Andsinceoursystemisneverthelesstopackthemallintothesamehouseandpretendthattheyarehappy，andthatthisparticularsortofhappinessisthefoundationofvirtue，itisfoundthatindiscussingfamilylifeweneverspeakofactualadultsoractualchildren，orofrealitiesofanysort，butalwaysofidealssuchasTheHome，aMother\'sInfluence，aFather\'sCare，FilialPiety，Duty，Affection，FamilyLife，etc。etc。，whicharenodoubtverycomfortingphrases，butwhichbegthequestionofwhatahomeandamother\'sinfluenceandafather\'scareandsoforthreallycometoinpractice。
Howmanyhoursaweekofthetimewhenhischildrenareoutofbeddoestheordinarybread-winningfatherspendinthecompanyofhischildrenoreveninthesamebuildingwiththem?Thehomemaybeathieves\'kitchen，themotheraprocuress，thefatheraviolentdrunkard；orthemotherandfathermaybefashionablepeoplewhoseetheirchildrenthreeorfourtimesayearduringtheholidays，andthennotoftenerthantheycanhelp，livingmeanwhileindailyandintimatecontactwiththeirvaletsandlady\'s-maids，whoseinfluenceandcareareoftendominantinthehousehold。Affection，asdistinguishedfromsimplekindliness，mayormaynotexist:whenitdoesiteitherdependsonqualitiesinthepartiesthatwouldproduceitequallyiftheywereofnokintooneanother，oritisamoreorlessmorbidsurvivalofthenursingpassion；foraffectionbetweenadults(iftheyarereallyadultinmindandnotmerelygrown-upchildren)andcreaturessorelatively
selfishandcruelaschildrennecessarilyarewithoutknowingitormeaningit，cannotbecallednatural:infacttheevidenceshewsthatitiseasiertolovethecompanyofadogthanofacommonplacechildbetweentheagesofsixandthebeginningsofcontrolledmaturity；forwomenwhocannotbeartobeseparatedfromtheirpetdogssendtheirchildrentoboardingschoolscheerfully。Theymaysayandevenbelievethatinallowingtheirchildrentoleavehometheyaresacrificingthemselvesfortheirchildren\'sgood；butthereareveryfewpetdogswhowouldnotbethebetterforamonthortwospentelsewherethaninalady\'slaporroastingonadrawingroomhearthrug。Besides，toallegethatchildrenarebettercontinuallyawayfromhomeistogiveupthewholepopularsentimentaltheoryofthefamily；yetthedogsarekeptandthechildrenarebanished。
ChildFanciersThereis，however，agooddealofspuriousfamilyaffection。Thereistheclannishnessthatwillmakeadozenbrothersandsisterswhoquarrelfuriouslyamongthemselvescloseuptheirranksandmakecommoncauseagainstabrother-in-laworasister-in-law。Andthereisastrongsenseofpropertyinchildren，whichoftenmakesmothersandfathersbitterlyjealousofallowinganyoneelsetointerferewiththeirchildren
whomtheymaynonethelesstreatverybadly。Andthereisanextremelydangerouscrazeforchildrenwhichleadscertainpeopletoestablishorphanagesandbabyfarmsandschools，seizinganypretextforfillingtheirhouseswithchildrenexactlyassomeeccentricoldladiesandgentlemenfilltheirswithcats。Insuchplacesthechildrenarethevictimsofallthecapricesofdotingaffectionandalltheexcessesoflasciviouscruelty。Yetthepeoplewhohavethismorbidcrazeseldomhaveanydifficultyinfindingvictims。Parentsandguardiansaresoworriedbychildrenandsoanxioustogetridofthemthatanyonewhoiswillingtotakethemofftheirhandsiswelcomedandwhitewashed。TheverypeoplewhoreadwithindignationofSqueersandCreakleinthenovelsofDickensarequitereadytohandovertheirownchildrentoSqueersandCreakle，andtopretendthatSqueersandCreaklearemonstersofthepast。ButreadtheautobiographyofStanleythetraveller，orsitinthecompanyofmentalkingabouttheirschool-days，andyouwillsoonfindthatfiction，whichmust，ifitistobesoldandread，stopshortofbeingpositivelysickening，darenottellthewholetruthaboutthepeopletowhomchildrenarehandedoveroneducationalpretexts。NotverylongagoaschoolmasterinIrelandwasmurderedbyhisboys
andforreasonswhichwerenevermadepublicitwasatfirstdecidednottoprosecutethemurderers。Yetallthesefloggingschoolmastersandorphanagefiendsandbabyfarmersare\"loversofchildren。\"Theyarereallychildfanciers(likebirdfanciersordogfanciers)byirresistiblenaturalpredilection，neverhappyunlesstheyaresurroundedbytheirvictims，andalwayscertaintomaketheirlivingbyacceptingthecustodyofchildren，nomatterhowmanyalternativeoccupationsmaybeavailable。Andbearinmindthattheyareonlytheextremeinstancesofwhatiscommonlycallednaturalaffection，apparentlybecauseitisobviouslyunnatural。
Thereallynaturalfeelingofadultsforchildreninthelongprosaicintervalsbetweenthemomentsofaffectionateimpulseisjustthatfeelingthatleadsthemtoavoidtheircareandconstantcompanyasaburdenbeyondbearing，andtopretendthattheplacestheysendthemtoarewellconducted，beneficial，andindispensabletothesuccessofthechildreninafterlife。Thetruecryofthekindmotherafterherlittlerosaryofkissesis\"Runaway，darling。\"Itisnicerthan\"Holdyournoise，youyoungdevil；oritwillbetheworseforyou\"；
butfundamentallyitmeansthesamething:thatifyoucompelanadultandachildtoliveinoneanother\'scompanyeithertheadultorthechildwillbemiserable。Thereisnothingwhateverunnaturalorwrongorshockinginthisfact；andthereisnoharminitifonlyitbesensiblyfacedandprovidedfor。Themischiefthatitdoesatpresentisproducedbyoureffortstoignoreit，ortosmotheritunderaheapofsentimentalliesandfalsepretences。
ChildhoodasaStateofSinUnfortunatelyallthisnonsensetendstoaccumulateaswebecomemoresympathetic。Inmanyfamiliesitisstillthecustomtotreatchildhoodfranklyasastateofsin，andimpudentlyproclaimthemonstrousprinciplethatlittlechildrenshouldbeseenandnotheard，andtoenforceasetofprisonrulesdesignedsolelytomakecohabitationwithchildrenasconvenientaspossibleforadultswithoutthesmallestregardfortheinterests，eitherremoteorimmediate，ofthechildren。Thissystemtendstoproduceatough，ratherbrutal，stupid，unscrupulousclass，withafixedideathatallenjoymentconsistsinundetectedsinning；andincertainphasesofcivilizationpeopleofthiskindareapttogettheupperhandofmoreamiableandconscientiousracesandclasses。Theyhavetheferocityofachaineddog
andareproudofit。Buttheendofitisthattheyarealwaysinchains，evenattheheightoftheirmilitaryorpoliticalsuccess:theywineverythingonconditionthattheyareafraidtoenjoyit。Theircivilizationsrestonintimidation，whichissonecessarytothemthatwhentheycannotfindanybodybraveenoughtointimidatethemtheyintimidatethemselvesandliveinacontinualmoralandpoliticalpanic。Intheendtheygetfoundoutandbullied。Butthatisnotthepointthatconcernsushere，whichis，thattheyareinsomerespectsbetterbroughtupthanthechildrenofsentimentalpeoplewhoarealwaysanxiousandmiserableabouttheirdutytotheirchildren，andwhoendbyneithermakingtheirchildrenhappynorhavingatolerablelifeforthemselves。Aselfishtyrantyouknowwheretohave，andhe(orshe)atleastdoesnotconfuseyouraffections；butaconscientiousandkindlymeddlermayliterallyworryyououtofyoursenses。Itisfortunatethatonlyveryfewparentsarecapableofdoingwhattheyconceivetheirdutycontinuouslyorevenatall，andthatstillfeweraretoughenoughtorideroughshodovertheirchildrenathome。
SchoolButpleaseobservethelimitation\"athome。\"Whatprivateamateurparentalenterprisecannotdomaybedoneveryeffectivelybyorganizedprofessionalenterpriseinlargeinstitutionsestablishedforthepurpose。Anditistosuchprofessionalenterprisethatparentshandovertheirchildrenwhentheycanaffordit。Theysendtheirchildrentoschool；andthereis，onthewhole，nothingonearthintendedforinnocentpeoplesohorribleasaschool。Tobeginwith，itisaprison。Butitisinsomerespectsmorecruelthanaprison。
Inaprison，forinstance，youarenotforcedtoreadbookswrittenbythewardersandthegovernor(whoofcoursewouldnotbewardersandgovernorsiftheycouldwritereadablebooks)，andbeatenorotherwisetormentedifyoucannotremembertheirutterlyunmemorablecontents。
Intheprisonyouarenotforcedtositlisteningtoturnkeysdiscoursingwithoutcharmorinterestonsubjectsthattheydontunderstandanddontcareabout，andarethereforeincapableofmakingyouunderstandorcareabout。Inaprisontheymaytortureyourbody；
buttheydonottortureyourbrains；andtheyprotectyouagainstviolenceandoutragefromyourfellowprisoners。Inaschoolyouhavenoneoftheseadvantages。Withtheworld\'sbookshelvesloadedwithfascinatingandinspiredbooks，theverymannasentdownfromHeaventofeedyoursouls，youareforcedtoreadahideousimposturecalledaschoolbook，writtenbyamanwhocannotwrite:abookfromwhichnohumanbeingcanlearnanything:abookwhich，thoughyoumaydecipherit，youcannotinanyfruitfulsenseread，thoughtheenforcedattemptwillmakeyouloathethesightofabookalltherestofyourlife。Withmillionsofacresofwoodsandvalleysandhillsandwindandairandbirdsandstreamsandfishesandallsortsofinstructiveandhealthythingseasilyaccessible，orwithstreetsandshopwindowsandcrowdsandvehiclesandallsortsofcitydelightsatthedoor，youareforcedtosit，notinaroomwithsomehumangraceandcomfortorfurnitureanddecoration，butinastalledpoundwithalotofotherchildren，beatenifyoutalk，beatenifyoumove，beatenifyoucannotprovebyansweringidioticquestionsthatevenwhenyouescapedfromthepoundandfromtheeyeofyourgaoler，youwerestillagonizingoverhisdetestableshambooksinsteadofdaringtolive。
Andyourchildishhatredofyourgaolerandfloggerisnothingtohisadulthatredofyou；forheisaslaveforcedtoendureyoursocietyforhisdailybread。Youhavenoteventhesatisfactionofknowinghowyouaretorturinghimandhowheloathesyou；andyougiveyourselfunnecessarypainstoannoyhimwithfurtivetricksandspitefuldoingofforbiddenthings。Nowonderheissometimesprovokedtofiendishoutburstsofwrath。Nowondermenofdownrightsense，likeDrJohnson，admitthatundersuchcircumstanceschildrenwillnotlearnanythingunlesstheyaresocruellybeatenthattheymakedesperateeffortstomemorizewordsandphrasestoescapeflagellation。Itisaghastlybusiness，quitebeyondwords，thisschooling。
AndnowIhearcriesofprotestarisingallround。Firstmyownschoolmasters，ortheirghosts
askingwhetherIwascruellybeatenatschool?No；butthenIdidnotlearnanythingatschool。DrJohnson\'sschoolmasterpresumablydidcareenoughwhetherSamlearnedanythingtobeathimsavagelyenoughtoforcehimtolamehismind——forJohnson\'sgreatmind_was_lamed——bylearninghislessons。Noneofmyschoolmastersreallycaredarap(orperhapsitwouldbefairertothemtosaythattheiremployersdidnotcarearapandthereforedidnotgivethemthenecessarycaningpowers)whetherIlearntmylessonsornot，providedmyfatherpaidmyschoolingbill，thecollectionofwhichwastherealobjectoftheschool。ConsequentlyI
didnotlearnmyschoollessons，havingmuchmoreimportantonesinhand，withtheresultthatIhavenotwastedmylifetriflingwithliteraryfoolsintavernsasJohnsondidwhenheshouldhavebeenshakingEnglandwiththethunderofhisspirit。Myschoolingdidmeagreatdealofharmandnogoodwhatever:itwassimplydraggingachild\'ssoulthroughthedirt；butIescapedSqueersandCreaklejustasIescapedJohnsonandCarlyle。Andthisiswhathappenstomostofus。Wearenoteffectivelycoercedtolearn:westaveoffpunishmentasfaraswecanbylyingandtrickeryandguessingandusingourwits；andwhenthisdoesnotsufficewescribbleimpositions，orsufferextraimprisonments——\"keepingin\"wasthephraseinmytime——orletamasterstrikeuswithacaneandfallbackonourprideatbeingabletohearitphysically(henotbeingallowedtohitustoohard)
tooutfacethedishonorweshouldhavebeentaughttodieratherthanendure。Andsoidlenessandworthlessnessontheonehandandapretenceofcoercionontheotherbecameadespicableroutine。Ifmyschoolmastershadbeenreallyengagedineducatingmeinsteadofpainfullyearningtheirbreadbykeepingmefromannoyingmyelderstheywouldhaveturnedmeoutoftheschool，tellingmethatIwasthoroughlydisloyaltoit；thatIhadnointentionoflearning；thatI
wasmockinganddistractingtheboyswhodidwishtolearn；thatIwasaliarandashirkerandaseditiouslittlenuisance；andthatnothingcouldinjuremeincharacteranddegradetheiroccupationmorethanallowingme(muchlessforcingme)toremainintheschoolundersuchconditions。Butinordertogetexpelled，itwasnecessarycommitacrimeofsuchatrocitythattheparentsofotherboyswouldhavethreatenedtoremovetheirsonssoonerthanallowthemtobeschoolfellowswiththedelinquent。Icanrememberonlyonecaseinwhichsuchapenaltywasthreatened；andinthatcasetheculprit，aboarder，hadkissedahousemaid，orpossibly，beingahandsomeyouth，beenkissedbyher。Shedidnotkissme；andnobodyeverdreamtofexpellingme。Thetruthwas，aboymeantjustsomuchayeartotheinstitution。Thatwaswhyhewaskeptthereagainsthiswill。Thatwaswhyhewaskepttherewhenhisexpulsionwouldhavebeenanunspeakablereliefandbenefitbothtohisteachersandhimself。
Itmaybearguedthatiftheuncommercialattitudehadbeentaken，andallthedisloyalwastersandidlersshewnsternlytothedoor，theschoolwouldnothavebeenemptied，butfilled。Butsohonestanattitudewasimpossible。Themastersmusthavehatedtheschoolmuchmorethantheboysdid。Justasyoucannotimprisonamanwithoutimprisoningawardertoseethathedoesnotescape，thewarderbeingtiedtotheprisonaseffectuallybythefearofunemploymentandstarvationastheprisonerisbytheboltsandbars，sothesepoorschoolmasters，withtheirsmallsalariesandlargeclasses，wereasmuchprisonersaswewere，andmuchmoreresponsibleandanxiousones。
Theycouldnotimposetheheroicattitudeontheiremployers；norwouldtheyhavebeenabletoobtainplacesasschoolmastersiftheirhabitshadbeenheroic。Forthebestofthemtheiremploymentwasprovisional:theylookedforwardtoescapingfromitintothepulpit。
Theablestandmostimpatientofthemwereoftensoirritatedbytheawkward，slow-witted，slovenlyboys:thatis，theonesthatrequiredspecialconsiderationandpatienttreatment，thattheyventedtheirirritationonthemruthlessly，nothingbeingeasierthantoentraporbewildersuchaboyintogivingapretextforpunishinghim。
MyScholasticAcquirementsTheresults，asfarasIwasconcerned，werewhatmighthavebeenexpected。MyschoolmadeonlythethinnestpretenceofteachinganythingbutLatinandGreek。WhenIwentthereasaverysmallboyI
knewagooddealofLatingrammarwhichIhadbeentaughtinafewweeksprivatelybymyuncle。WhenIhadbeenseveralyearsatschoolthissameuncleexaminedmeanddiscoveredthatthenetresultofmyschoolingwasthatIhadforgottenwhathehadtaughtme，andhadlearntnothingelse。Tothisday，thoughIcanstilldeclineaLatinnounandrepeatsomeoftheoldparadigmsintheoldmeaninglessway，becausetheirrhythmstickstome，IhaveneveryetseenaLatininscriptiononatombthatIcouldtranslatethroughout。OfGreekI
candecipherperhapsthegreaterpartoftheGreekalphabet。Inshort，Iam，astoclassicaleducation，anotherShakespear。IcanreadFrenchaseasilyasEnglish；andunderpressureofnecessityI
canturntoaccountsomescrapsofGermanandalittleoperaticItalian；buttheseIwasnevertaughtatschool。Instead，Iwastaughtlying，dishonorablesubmissiontotyranny，dirtystories，ablasphemoushabitoftreatingloveandmaternityasobscenejokes，hopelessness，evasion，derision，cowardice，andalltheblackguard\'sshiftsbywhichthecowardintimidatesothercowards。AndifIhadbeenaboarderatanEnglishpublicschoolinsteadofadayboyatanIrishone，Imighthavehadtoaddtothese，deepershamesstill。
SchoolmastersofGeniusAndnow，ifIhavereducedtheghostsofmyschoolmasterstomelancholyacquiescenceinallthis(whicheverybodywhohasbeenatanordinaryschoolwillrecognizeastrue)，Ihavestilltomeetthemuchmoresincereprotestsofthehandfulofpeoplewhohaveanaturalgeniusfor\"bringingup\"children。IshallbeaskedwithkindlyscornwhetherIhaveheardofFroebelandPestalozzi，whetherIknowtheworkthatisbeingdonebyMissMasonandtheDottoressaMontessorior，bestofallasIthink，theEurythmicsSchoolofJacquesDalcrozeatHelleraunearDresden。JacquesDalcroze，likePlato，believesinsaturatinghispupilswithmusic。Theywalktomusic，playtomusic，worktomusic，obeydrillcommandsthatwouldbewilderaguardsmantomusic，thinktomusic，livetomusic，getsoclearheadedaboutmusicthattheycanmovetheirseverallimbseachinadifferentmetreuntiltheybecomecomplicatedlivingmagazinesofcrossrhythms，and，whatismore，makemusicforotherstodoallthesethingsto。Strangerstill，thoughJacquesDalcroze
likeallthesegreatteachers，isthecompletestoftyrants，knowingwhatisrightandthathemustandwillhavethelessonjustsoorelsebreakhisheart(notsomebodyelse\'s，observe)，yethisschoolissofascinatingthateverywomanwhoseesitexclaims\"Oh，whywasInottaughtlikethis!\"andelderlygentlemenexcitedlyenrolthemselvesasstudentsanddistractclassesofinfantsbytheirdesperateendeavorstobeattwoinabarwithonehandandthreewiththeother，andstartoffonearnestwalksroundtheroom，takingtwostepsbackwardwheneverMonsieurDalerozecallsout\"Hop!\"Ohyes:Iknowallaboutthesewonderfulschoolsthatyoucannotkeepchildrenorevenadultsoutof，andtheseteacherswhomtheirpupilsnotonlyobeywithoutcoercion，butadore。AndifyouwilltellmeroughlyhowmanyMasonsandMontessorisandDalcrozesyouthinkyoucanpickupinEuropeforsalariesoffromthirtyshillingstofivepoundsaweek，Iwillestimateyourchancesofconvertingyourmillionsoflittlescholastichellsintolittlescholasticheavens。
Ifyouareadistressedgentlewomanstartingtomakealiving，youcanstillopenalittleschool；andyoucaneasilybuyasecondhandbrassplateinscribedPESTALOZZIANINSTITUTEandnailittoyourdoor，thoughyouhavenomoreideaofwhoPestalozziwasandwhatheadvocatedorhowhediditthanthemanagerofahotelwhichbeganasaHydropathichasofthewatercure。OryoucanbuyacheaperplateinscribedKINDERGARTEN，andimagine，orleaveotherstoimagine，thatFroebelisthegoverninggeniusofyourlittle_creche_。NodoubtthenewbrassplatesarebeinginscribedMontessoriInstitute，andwillbeusedwhentheDotteressaisnolongerwithusbyalltheMrsPipchinsandMrsWilfersthroughoutthisunhappyland。
Iwillgofurther，andadmitthatthebrassplatesmaynotallbefrauds。IwilltellyouthatoneofmyfriendswasledtogenuineloveandconsiderableknowledgeofclassicalliteraturebyanIrishschoolmasterwhomyouwouldcallahedgeschoolmaster(hewouldnotbeallowedtoteachanythingnow)andthatittookfouryearsofHarrowtoobliteratethatknowledgeandchangetheloveintoloathing。
Anotherfriendofminewhokeepsaschoolinthesuburbs，andwhodeeplydeploresmy\"prejudiceagainstschoolmasters，\"hasofferedtoacceptmychallengetotellhispupilsthattheyareasfreetogetupandgooutoftheschoolatanymomentastheirparentsaretogetupandgooutofatheatrewheremyplaysarebeingperformed。EvenamongmyownschoolmastersIcanrecollectafewwhoseclassesinterestedme，andwhomIshouldcertainlyhavepesteredforinformationandinstructionifIcouldhavegotintoanydecenthumanrelationshipwiththem，andiftheyhadnotbeencompelledbytheirpositiontodefendthemselvesascarefullyagainstsuchadvancesasagainstfurtiveattemptstohurtthemaccidentallyinthefootballfieldorsmashtheirhatswithaclodfrombehindawall。Buttheserarecasesactuallydomoreharmthangood；fortheyencourageustopretendthatallschoolmastersarelikethat。Ofwhatuseisittousthattherearealwayssomewheretwoorthreeteachersofchildrenwhosespecificgeniusfortheiroccupationtriumphsoverourtyrannoussystemandevenfindsinititsopportunity?Forthatmatter，itispossible，ifdifficult，tofindasolicitor，orevenajudge，whohassomenotionofwhatlawmeans，adoctorwithaglimmeringofscience，anofficerwhounderstandsdutyanddiscipline
andaclergymanwithaninklingofreligion，thoughtherearenothinglikeenoughofthemtogoround。Buteventhefewwho，likeIbsen\'sMrsSolness，have\"ageniusfornursingthesoulsoflittlechildren\"arelikeangelsforcedtoworkinprisonsinsteadofinheaven；andevenatthattheyaremostlyunderpaidanddespised。ThatfriendofminewhowentfromthehedgeschoolmastertoHarrowoncesawaschoolmasterrushfromanelementaryschoolinpursuitofaboyandstrikehim。Myfriend，notconsideringthattheunfortunatemanwasprobablygoadedbeyondendurance，smotetheschoolmasterandblackenedhiseye。Theschoolmasterappealedtothelaw；andmyfriendfoundhimselfwaitingnervouslyintheHammersmithPoliceCourttoanswerforhisbreachofthepeace。Inhisanxietyheaskedapoliceofficerwhatwouldhappentohim。\"Whatdidyoudo?\"saidtheofficer。\"Igaveamanablackeye\"saidmyfriend。\"Sixpoundsifhewasagentleman:twopoundsifhewasnt，\"saidtheconstable。\"Hewasaschoolmaster\"saidmyfriend。\"Twopounds\"saidtheofficer；andtwopounds
itwas。Thebloodmoneywaspaidcheerfully；andIhaveeversinceadvisedelementaryschoolmasterstoqualifythemselvesintheartofself-defence，astheBritishConstitutionexpressesournationalestimateofthembyallowingustoblackenthreeoftheireyesforthesamepriceasoneofanordinaryprofessionalman。HowmanyFroebelsandPestalozzisandMissMasonsandDoctoressMontessoriswouldyoubelikelytogetonthesetermseveniftheyoccurredmuchmorefrequentlyinnaturethantheyactuallydo?
No:Icannotbeputoffbythenewsthatoursystemwouldbeperfectifitwereworkedbyangels。Idonotadmititevenatthat，justasIdonotadmitthatiftheskyfellweshouldallcatchlarks。ButI