第4章

\"Why,ofcourse,Mrs。Deering。It\'sapublichouse,likeanyother,andyouhaveasmuchright——\"

\"ButIdidn\'twantyoutothinkthatIwoulddoitwithoutaskingyou,andifitisgoingtobetheleastbitoftroubletoyou。\"ThepoorthingwhileshetalkedstoodleaninganxiouslyovertowardMrs。

March,whohadrisen,andpressingthepointsofherfingersnervouslytogether。

\"Itwon\'t,Mrs。Deering。Itwillbenothingbutpleasure。Why,certainly。IshallbedelightedtohaveMissGagehere,andanythingthatMr。MarchandIcando——Why,wehadjustbeentalkingofit,andMr。Marchhasthisminutegotbackfromseeingtheclerk,andshecanhaveaveryniceroom。Wehadbeenintendingtospeaktoyouaboutitassoonaswesawyou。\"

Idonotknowwhetherthiswasquitetrueornot,butIwasgladMrs。Marchsaidit,fromtheeffectithaduponMrs。Deering。Tearsofreliefcameintohereyes,andshesaid:\"ThenIcangohomeinthemorning。Iwasgoingtostayonadayortwolonger,onJulia\'saccount,butIdidn\'tfeeljustrightaboutMr。Deering,andnowI

won\'thaveto。\"

Therefollowedaflutterofpoliteoffersandrefusals,acknowledgmentsanddisavowals,andanunderstandingthatIwouldarrangeitall,andthatwewouldcometoMrs。Deering\'shotelaftersupperandseeMissGageaboutthewhenandthehowofhercomingtous。\"

\"Well,Isabel,\"Isaid,afteritwasallover,andMrs。Deeringhadvanishedinamistofhappytears,\"Isupposethisiswhatyoucallperfectlyprovidential。DoyoureallybelievethatMissGagedidn\'tsendherback?\"

\"Iknowshedidn\'t。ButIknowthatsheHADtodoitjustthesameasifMissGagehaddrivenheratthepointofthebayonet。\"

Ilaughedatthistragicalimage。\"Canshebesuchaterror?\"

\"Sheisanideal。AndMrs。Deeringisasafraidasdeathofher。

Ofcourseshehastoliveuptoher。It\'sprobablybeenthestruggleofherlife,andIcanquiteimagineherlettingherhusbanddiebeforeshewouldtakeMissGageback,unlessshewentbacksatisfied。\"

\"Idon\'tbelieveIcanimaginesomuchasthatexactly,butIcanimagineherbeingafraidofMissGage\'stakingitoutofhersomehow。Nowshewilltakeitoutofus。Ihopeyourealisethatyou\'vedoneitnow,mydear。Tobesure,youwillhaveallyourlifetorepentofyourrashness。\"

\"Ishallneverrepent,\"Mrs。Marchretortedhardily。\"Itwastherightthing,theonlything。Wecouldn\'thaveletthatpoorcreaturestayon,whenshewassoanxioustogetbacktoherhusband。\"

\"No。\"

\"AndIconfess,Basil,thatIfeelalittlepityforthatpoorgirl,too。Itwouldhavebeencruel,itwouldhavebeenfairlywicked,tolethergohomesosoon,andespeciallynow。\"

\"Oh!AndIsupposethatbyESPECIALLYNOW,youmeanKendricks,\"I

said,andIlaughedmockingly,asthenovelistssay。\"HowsickIamofthisstaleoldlove-businessbetweenyoungpeople!Weoughttoknowbetter——we\'reoldenough;atleastYOUare。\"

Sheseemednottofeelthegibe。\"Why,Basil,\"sheaskeddreamily,\"haven\'tyouanyromanceleftinyou?\"

\"Romance?Bah!It\'sthemostridiculousunrealityintheworld。

Ifyouhadsomuchsympathyforthatstupidgirl,inthatpoorwomaninheranxietyaboutherdisappointment,whyhadn\'tyoualittleforhersickhusband?Butahusbandisnothing——whenyouhavegothim。\"

\"Ididsympathisewithher。\"

\"Youdidn\'tsayso。\"

\"Well,sheisonlyhissecondwife,andIdon\'tsupposeit\'sanythingserious。Didn\'tIreallysayanythingtoher?\"

\"Notaword。Itiscurious,\"Iwenton,\"howweletthisidioticlove-passionabsorbustotheverylast。Itiswhollyunimportantwhomarrieswho,orwhetheranybodymarriesatall。Andyetwenosoonerhavethemakingofalove-affairwithinreachthanwereverttothefollyofourownyouth,andabandonourselvestoitasifitwereoneofthegreatinterestsoflife。\"

\"Whoistalkingaboutlove?Itisn\'taquestionofthat。It\'saquestionofmakingagirlhaveapleasanttimeforafewdays;andwhatistheharmofit?Girlshaveadullenoughtimeattheverybest。Myheartachesforthem,andIshallneverletachancesliptohelpthem,Idon\'tcarewhatyousay。\"

\"Now,Isabel,\"Ireturned,\"don\'tyoubeahumbug。Thisisaperfectlyplaincase,andyouaregoinginforaveryriskyaffairwithyoureyesopen。Youshallnotpretendyou\'renot。\"

\"Verywell,then,ifIamgoingintoitwithmyeyesopen,Ishalllookoutthatnothinghappens。\"

\"Andyouthinkprevisionwillavail!Iwish,\"Isaid,\"thatinsteadofcominghomethatnightandtellingyouaboutthisgirl,IhadconfinedmysentimentalisingtothatyoungFrench-Canadianmother,andherdirtylittleboywhoatethepea-nutshells。I\'venodoubtitwasreallyamoretragicalcase。Theylookeddreadfullypoorandsqualid。Whycouldn\'tIhaveamusedmyidlefancywiththeirfortunes——thesortofhusbandandfathertheyhad,theirshabbyhome,thestruggleoftheirlife?Thatistheappealthatagenuinepersonlistensto。NothingdoesmoretostampmeaposeurthanthefactthatIpreferredtobemoanmyselfforasulkygirlwhoseemednottobehavingagoodtime。\"

Therewastruthinmyjoking,butthetruthdidnotsaveme;itlostmerather。\"Yes,\"saidmywife;\"itwasyourfault。Ishouldneverhaveseenanythinginherifithadnotbeenforyou。Itwasyourcomingbackandworkingmeupaboutherthatbeganthewholething,andnowifanythinggoeswrongyouwillhaveyourselftothankforit。\"

Sheseizedtheopportunityofmyhavingjestinglytakenupthisloadtobuckleitonmetightandfast,claspingithere,tyingitthere,andgivingafinalpulltotheknotsthatleftmescarcelythepowertodrawmybreath,muchlessthebreathtoprotest。IwasforcedtohearhersayagainthatallherconcernfromthebeginningwasforMrs。Deering,andthatnow,ifshehadofferedtodosomethingforMissGage,itwasnotbecauseshecaredanythingforher,butbecauseshecaredeverythingforMrs。Deering,whocouldneverliftupherheadagainatDeWittPointifshewentbacksocompletelydefeatedinallthepurposesshehadinaskingMissGagetocomewithhertoSaratoga。

IdidnotobservethatthiswaveofcompassioncarriedMrs。MarchsofarastoleaveherstrandedwithMrs。DeeringthateveningwhenwecalledwithKendricks,andaskedherandMissGagetogowithustotheCongressParkconcert。Mrs。Deeringsaidthatshehadtopack,thatshedidnotfeeljustexactlylikegoing;andmytenderheartachedwithaknowledgeofherdistress。MissGagemadeafaint,falsepretenceofrefusingtocomewithus,too;butMrs。Deeringurgedhertogo,andputonthenewdress,whichhadjustcomehome,sothatMrs。Marchcouldseeit。Thegirlcamebacklookingradiant,divine,and——\"Willitdo?\"shepalpitatedundermywife\'scriticalglance。

\"Do?ItwillOUTdo!Ineversawanythinglikeit!\"Theconnoisseurpatteditalittlethiswayandalittlethat。\"Itisadream!Didthehatcometoo?\"

Itappearedthatthehathadcometoo。MissGagerematerialisedwithiton,afteramoment\'sevanescence,andlookedatmywifewiththeexpressionofbeingsomethingimpersonalwithahaton。

\"Simply,thereisnothingtosay!\"criedMrs。March。Thegirlputupherhandstoit。\"Goodgracious!Youmustn\'ttakeitoff!Yourcostumeisperfectfortheconcert。\"

\"Isit,really?\"askedthegirljoyfully;andsheseemedtofindthisthefirstfittingmomenttosay,forsolerecognitionofourself-sacrifice,\"I\'mmuchobligedtoyou,Mr。March,forgettingmethatroom。\"

Ibeggedhernottospeakofit,andturnedanironicaleyeuponmywife;butshewaslostinadmirationofthehat。

\"Yes,\"shesighed;\"it\'smuchbetterthantheoneIwantedyoutogetatfirst。\"Andsheafterwardexplainedthatthegirlseemedtohaveaperfectinstinctforwhatwentwithherstyle。

Kendrickskepthimselfdiscreetlyinthebackground,and,withhisunfailingrightfeeling,wastalkingtoMrs。Deering,inspiteofhernotpayingmuchattentiontohim。ImustownthatItoowasabsorbedinthespectacleofMissGage。

Shewentoffwithus,anddidnotsayanotherwordtoMrs。Deeringabouthelpinghertopack。Perhapsthiswasbest,thoughitseemedheartless;itmaynothavebeensoheartlessasitseemed。Idaresayitwouldhavebeenmoresufferingtothewomanifthegirlhadmissedthischance。

CHAPTERX

Wehadundertakenratheraqueeraffairbutitwasnotsoqueerafterall,whenMissGagewasfairlysettledwithus。Therewereotheryounggirlsinthatpleasanthousewhohadonlyoneanother\'sprotectionandthegeneralsafetyofthesocialatmosphere。Wecouldnotconcealfromourselves,ofcourse,thatwehaddonearatherromanticthing,and,inthelightofEurope,whichwehadmoreorlessuponouractions,ratheranabsurdthing;butitwasacomforttofindthatMissGagethoughtitneitherromanticnorabsurd。Shetooktheaffairwithanapparentignoranceofanythingunusualinit——withsomuchignorance,indeed,thatMrs。Marchhadheroccasionalquestionwhethershewasdulyimpressedwithwhatwasbeingdoneforher。Whetherthiswassoornot,itiscertainthatshewasasdocileandasbiddableasneedbe。Shedidnotalwaysaskwhatsheshoulddo;thatwouldnothavebeeninthetraditionofvillageindependence;butshealwaysdidwhatshewastold,anddidnotvaryfromherinstructionsahair\'s-breadth。Idonotsupposeshealwaysknewwhyshemightdothisandmightnotdothat;andI

donotsupposethatyounggirlsoftenunderstandthereasonsoftheproprieties。Theyaretoldthattheymust,andthattheymustnot,andthisinanastonishingdegreesufficesthemiftheyarenicegirls。

OfcoursetherewasprettyconstantquestionofKendricksinthemanagementofMissGage\'samusement,forthatwasreallywhatourenterpriseresolveditselfinto。Heshowedfromthefirstthesweetestdispositiontoforwardallourplansinregardtoher,and,infact,heevenanticipatedourwishes。IdonotmeantogivethenotionthathebehavedfromaninterestedmotiveingoingtothestationthemorningMrs。Deeringleft,andgettingherticketforher,andcheckingherbaggage,andpostingherinthechangesshewouldhavetomake。ThiswassomethingIoughttohavethoughtofmyself,butIdidnotthinkofit,andIamwillingthatheshouldhaveallthecredit。

Iknowthathediditoutofthelovelygenerosityofnaturewhichalwaystookmeinhim。MissGagewastherewithher,andsheremainedtobeconsoledafterMrs。Deeringdeparted。Theycamestraighttousfromthetrain,andthen,whenhehadconsignedMissGagetoMrs。March\'scare,heofferedtogoandseethatherthingsweretransferredfromherhoteltoours;theywereallready,shesaid,andthebillwaspaid。

Hedidnotcomebackthatday,and,infact,hedelicatelywaitedforsomesignfromusthathishelpwaswanted。ButwhenhedidcomehehadformulatedSaratogaverycompletely,andhadabetterconceptionofdoingitthanIhad,aftermyrepeatedsojourns。

WewentveryearlyinourexplorationstotheHouseofPansa,whichyoufindinverymuchbetterrepairatSaratogathanyoudoatPompeii,andwecontrivedtopassawholeafternoonthere。MywifeandIhadbeentherebeforemorethanonce;butitalwayspleasantlyrecalledourwander-years,whenwefirstmetinEurope,andwesufferedroundafterthoseyoungthingswithapatiencewhichIhopewillnotbeforgottenatthedayofjudgment。Whenwecametoaseatwesatdown,andletthemgooffbythemselves;butmyrecollectionisthatthereisnotmuchfurnitureintheHouseofPansathatyoucansitdownon,andforthemostpartweallkepttogether。

KendricksandIthoughtalikeaboutthePompeianhouseasamodelofsomethingthatmightbedoneinthewayofaseasidecottageinourowncountry,andwetalkedupalittlepaperthatmightbedoneforEveryOtherWeek,withprettyarchitecturaldrawings,givinganaccountofourimaginaryrealisationofthenotion。

\"Havesomebody,\"hesaid,\"visitpeoplewhohadbeenboringhimtocomedown,orup,orout,andseethem,andfindtheminaPompeianhouse,withtheseainfrontandablue-greengroveoflowpinesbehind。Mighthaveathreadofstory,butmostlytalkabouthowtheycametodoit,andhowdelightfullylivabletheyfoundit。Youcouldworkitupwithsomearchitect,whowouldhelpyouto\'keepoffthegrass\'inthewayoftechnicalblunders。Withallthistendencytotheclassicinpublicarchitecture,Idon\'tseewhythePompeianvillashouldn\'tbethenextwordforsummercottages。\"

\"Well,we\'llseewhatFulkersonsays。Hemayseeanad。init。

Wouldyouliketodoit?\"

\"Whynotdoityourself?Nobodyelsecoulddoitsowell。\"

\"Thanksforthetaffy;buttheideawasyours。\"

\"I\'lldoit,\"saidKendricksafteramoment,\"ifyouwon\'t。\"

\"We\'llsee。\"

MissGagestared,andMrs。Marchsaid-

\"Ididn\'tsupposetheHouseofPansawouldleadtoshopwithyoutwo。\"

\"Younevercantellwhichwaycopylies,\"Ireturned;andIaskedthegirl,\"WhatshouldYOUthink,MissGage,ofalittlepaperwithathreadofstory,butmostlytalk,onasupposititiousPompeiancottage?\"

\"Idon\'tbelieveIunderstand,\"saidshe,fartooremotefromourliteraryinterests,asIsaw,tobeashamedofherignorance。

\"There!\"IsaidtoKendricks。\"Doyouthinkthegeneralpublicwould?\"

\"MissGageisn\'tthegeneralpublic,\"saidmywife,whohadfollowedthecourseofmythought;hertoneimpliedthatMissGagewaswiserandbetter。

\"Wouldyouallowyourselftobedrawn,\"Iasked,\"dreamilyissuingfromanaisleofthepinegroveasthetutelarygoddessofaPompeiancottage?\"

Thegirlcastabewilderedglanceatmywife,whosaid,\"Youneedn\'tpayanyattentiontohim,MissGage。Hehasanideathatheismakingajoke。\"

Wefeltthatwehaddoneenoughforoneafternoon,whenwehaddonetheHouseofPansa,andIproposedthatweshouldgoandsitdowninCongressParkandlistentotheTroyband。Iwasnotwithoutthehopethatitwouldplay\"WashingtonPost。\"

Mywifecontrivedthatweshouldfallinbehindtheyoungpeopleaswewent,andsheasked,\"WhatDOyousupposeshemadeofitall?\"

\"ProbablyshethoughtitwasthehouseofSanchoPanza。\"

\"No;shehasn\'treadenoughtobesoignorantevenasthat。It\'sastonishinghowmuchshedoesn\'tknow。Whatcanherhomelifehavebeenlike?\"

\"Philistinetothelastdegree。Wepeoplewhoareneartoliteraturehavenoconceptionhowfarfromitmostpeopleare。Theimmensemajorityof\'homes,\'asthenewspaperscallthem,havenobooksinthemexcepttheBibleandasemi-religiousvolumeortwo——

thingsyouneverseeoutofsuch\'homes\'——andtheStatebusinessdirectory。IwasastonishedwhenitcameoutthatsheknewaboutEveryOtherWeek。Itmusthavebeenbyaccident。Thesordidnessofherhomelifemustbesomethingunimaginable。Thedaughterofavillagecapitalist,who\'sputtogetherhismoneydollarbydollar,astheydoinsuchplaces,fromthenecessitiesandfolliesofhisneighbours,andhashalfthefarmersoftheregionbythethroatthroughhismortgages——Idon\'tthinkthatshe\'s\'onetobedesired\'

anymorethan\'thedaughterofahundredearls,\'ifsomuch。\"

\"Shedoesn\'tseemsordidherself。\"

\"Oh,thetaintdoesn\'tshowitselfatonce——

\'IfnatureputnotforthherpowerAbouttheopeningoftheflower,Whoisitthatwouldliveanhour?\'

andsheisaflower,beautiful,exquisite\"

\"Yes,andshehadamotheraswellasthisfatherofhers。Whyshouldn\'tshebelikehermother?\"

Ilaughed。\"Thatistrue!Iwonderwhywealwaysleavethemotheroutofthecountwhenwesumupthehereditarytendencies?I

supposethemotherisasmuchaparentasthefather。\"

\"Quite。Andthereisnoreasonwhythisgirlshouldn\'thavehermother\'snature。\"

\"Wedon\'tactuallyKNOWanythingagainstherfather\'snatureyet,\"I

suggested;\"butifhermotherlivedastarvedandstuntedlifewithhim,itmayaccountforthateffectofdisappointedgreedwhichI

fanciedinherwhenIfirstsawher。\"

\"Idon\'tcallitgreedinayounggirltowanttoseesomethingoftheworld。\"

\"Whatdoyoucallit?\"

Kendricksandthegirlwerestoppingatthegateofthepavilion,andlookingroundatus。\"Ah,he\'sgotenoughforoneday!He\'sgoingtoleavehertousnow。\"

Whenwecameuphesaid,\"I\'mgoingtorunoffamoment;I\'mgoinguptothebook-storethere,\"andhepointedtowardonethathadspreadacrossthesidewalkjustbelowtheCongressHallverandah,withbanksandshelvesofnovels,andacryofbargainsinthemonsignsstickingupfromtheirrows。\"IwanttoseeiftheyhavetheLastDaysofPompeii。\"

\"Wewillfindtheladiesinsidethepark,\"Isaid。\"Iwillgowithyou——\"

\"Mr。MarchwantstoseeiftheyhavethelastnumberofEveryOtherWeek,\"mywifemockedafterus。Thiswas,indeed,commonlyafoibleofmine。Ihadnewlybecomeoneoftheownersoftheperiodicalaswellastheeditor,andIwasallthetimelookingoutforitatthenews-standsandbook-stores,andjudgingtheirenterprisebyitspresenceorabsence。ButthistimeIhadanothermotive,thoughI

didnotallegeit。

\"Isupposeit\'sforMissGage?\"Iventuredtosay,bywayofprefacingwhatIwishedtosay。\"Kendricks,I\'mafraidwe\'reabusingyourgoodnature。Iknowyou\'reupheretolookabout,andyou\'relettingususeallyourtime。Youmustn\'tdoit。Womenhavenoconscienceaboutthesethings,andyoucan\'texpectawomanwhohasayoungladyonherhandstospareyou。Igiveyouthehint。

Don\'tcountuponMrs。Marchinthismatter。\"

\"Oh,Ithinkyouareverygoodtoallowmetobotherround,\"saidtheyoungfellow,withthatindefatigablepolitenessofhis。Headdedvaguely,\"It\'sveryinteresting。\"

\"Seeingitthroughsuchafreshmind?\"Isuggested。\"Well,I\'llownthatIdon\'tthinkyoucouldhavefoundamuchfresherone。HasshereadtheLastDaysofPompeii?\"

\"Shethoughtshehadatfirst,butitwastheFallofGranada。\"

\"Howdelightful!Don\'tyouwishwecouldreadbookswiththatutterlyunliterarysenseofthem?\"

\"Don\'tyouthinkwomengenerallydo?\"heaskedevasively。

\"IdaresaytheydoatDeWittPoint。\"

Hedidnotanswer;Isawthathewasnotwillingtotalktheyoungladyover,andIcouldnothelppraisinghistastetomyselfatthecostofmyown。Hisdelicacyforbadehimtheindulgencewhichmyownprotestedagainstinvain。Heshowedhistasteagaininbuyingacheapcopyofthebook,whichhemeanttogiveher,andofcoursehehadtobeallthemoreattentivetoherbecauseofmydeprecatinghisself-devotion。

CHAPTERXI

IntheintimacythatgrewupbetweenmywifeandMissGageIfoundmyselflessandlessincluded。ItseemedtomeattimesthatI

mighthavegoneawayfromSaratogaandnotbeenseriouslymissedbyanyone,butperhapsthiswasnottakingsufficientaccountofmyvalueasaspectator,bywhomMrs。Marchcouldverifyherownimpressions。

Thegirlhadneverknownamother\'scare,anditwasaffectingtoseehowwillingshewastobemotheredbythechancekindnessofastranger。SheprobablyfeltmoreandmoreherignoranceoftheworldasitunfoldeditselftoherintermssoaltogetherstrangetothelifeofDeWittPoint。Iwasnotsurethatshewouldhavebeensogratefulfortheeffortsmadeforherenjoymentiftheyhadfailed,butasthecasestoodshewascertainlygrateful;mywifesaidthat,andIsawit。Sheseemedtohavewrittenhomeaboutustoherfather,forshereadmywifepartofaletterfromhimconveyinghis\"respects,\"andaskinghertothankusforhim。Shecametomewiththechequeitenclosed,andaskedmetogetitcashedforher;itwasforahandsomeamount。Butshecontinuedtogoaboutatourcost,quiteunconsciously,tillonedayshehappenedtowitnessacontestofcivilitybetweenKendricksandmyselfastowhichshouldpaythecarriageweweredismissing。ThatnightshecametoMrs。March,and,withmanyblushes,askedtobeallowedtopayforthepastandfutureherfullshareoftheexpenseofourjointpleasures。Shesaidthatshehadneverthoughtofitbefore,andshefeltsomuchashamed。Shecouldnotbeconsoledtillshewaspromisedthatsheshouldbeindulgedforthefuture,andthatI

shouldbeobligedtoaveragetheoutlayalreadymadeandletherpayafourth。Whenshehadgainedherpoint,Mrs。Marchsaidthatsheseemedalittlescared,andsaid,\"Ihaven\'toffendedyou,Mrs。

March,haveI?Becauseifitisn\'trightformetopay——\"

\"It\'squiteright,mydear,\"saidmywife,\"andit\'sveryniceofyoutothinkofit。\"

\"Youknow,\"thegirlexplained,\"I\'veneverbeenoutagreatdealathomeeven;andit\'salwaysthecustomthereforthegentlementopayforaride——ordance——oranything;butthisisdifferent。\"

MrsMarchsaid\"Yes,\"and,intheinterestofcivilisation,shedidalittlemissionarywork。ShetoldherthatinBostontheyoungladiespaidfortheirticketstotheHarvardassemblies,andpreferredtodoit,becauseitleftthemwithoutevenatacitobligation。

MissGagesaidshehadneverheardofsuchathingbefore,butshecouldseehowmuchbetteritwas。

IdonotthinkshegotonwiththeLastDaysofPompeiiveryrapidly;itsimmediateinterestwassupersededbyotherthings。Butshealwayshadthebookaboutwithher,andIfanciedthatshetriedtoreaditinthosemomentsofrelaxationfromourpleasuringwhenshemightbetterhavebeenday-dreaming,thoughIdaresayshedidenoughofthattoo。

Whatamusedmeintheaffairwastheceleritywithwhichittookitselfoutofourhands。InanincrediblyshorttimewehadnolongerthetroubleofthinkingwhatweshoulddoforMissGage;thatwasprovidedforbytheforethoughtofKendricks,andourconcernwashoweachcouldmaketheothergowiththeyoungpeopleontheirexcursionsandexpeditions。Wehadseenanddoneallthethingsthattheyweredoing,anditpresentlyboredustochaperonthem。

Afteragooddealoftalkingwearrivedataroughdivisionofduty,andIwentwiththemwalkingandeatinganddrinking,andforanythinginvolvinglatehours,andMrs。Marchpresidedatsuchthingsascarriageexercise,concerts,andshopping。

TherearenotmanypublicentertainmentsatSaratoga,exceptsuchasthehotelssupply;butaseriesofSalvationArmymeetingsdiddutyasamusements,andtherewasonetheatricalperformance——aperformanceofEastLynneentirelybypeopleofcolour。Thesentimentsandincidentsoftheheart-breakingmelodrama,asthecolouredmindinterpretedthem,wereofverycuriouseffect。Itwasasiftheversionweredyedwiththesamepigmentthatdarkenedtheplayers\'skins:itallcameoutnegro。Yettheyhadtriedtomakeitwhite;Icouldperceivehowtheyaimednotattheimitationofournature,butattheimitationofourconvention;itwasliketheplayofchildreninthat。Ishouldhavesaidthatnothingcouldbemorefalsethanthemotivesandemotionsofthedramaastheauthorimaginedthem,butIhadtoownthattheirrenditionbythesesinceresoulswasyetmoreartificial。Therewasnothingtraditional,nothingarchaic,nothingautochthonicintheirpoorart。Ifthescenecouldatanymomenthaveresolvedmyselfintoawalk-round,withaninterspersionofspirituals,itwouldhavehadthecharmofthese;itwouldhaveconsoledandedified;butasitwasIhaveseldombeensobored。Ibegantomakesomesadreflections,asthatourAmericansociety,initsendeavourfortheeffectofEuropeansociety,wasofnotrueridealthanthesecolouredcomedians,andIaccusedmyselfofafinalabsurdityinhavingcometherewiththeseyoungpeople,who,accordingtoourgoodnativeusage,couldhavecomeperfectlywellwithoutme。AttheendofthefirstactIbrokeintotheirtalkwithmyconclusionthatwemustnotcountthehistrionictalentamongthegiftsoftheAfricanracejustyet。Wecouldconcedethemmusic,Isupposed,andthereseemedtobehopeforthem,fromwhattheyhadsomeofthemdone,intheregionoftheplasticarts;butapparentlythestagewasnotforthem,andthiswasallthestrangerbecausetheyweresoimitative。Perhaps,Isaid,itwasanexcessofself-consciousnesswhichpreventedtheirgivingthemselveswhollytotheart,andI

begantospeakofthesubjectiveandtheobjective,oftherealandtheideal;andwhetheritwasthatIbecameunintelligibleasI

becamemetaphysical,IfoundKendricksobviouslynotfollowingmeintheincoherentreplieshegave。MissGagehadhonestlymadenoattempttofollowme。Heasked,Why,didn\'tIthinkitwasprettywelldone?Theyhadenjoyeditverymuch,hesaid。Icouldonlystareinanswer,andwonderwhathadbecomeoftheman\'stastesorhisprinciples;hewaseitherhumbugginghimselforhewashumbuggingme。AfterthatIleftthemalone,andsufferedthroughtherestoftheplaywithwhatreliefIcouldgetfromlaughingwhenthepatheticemotionsofthedramabecametoopoignant。IdecidedthatKendrickswasabsorbedinthestudyofhiscompanion\'smind,whichmustbeopentohiscontemporaneouseyeasitcouldneverhavebeentomyold-sightedglasses,andIenviedhimtheknowledgehewasgainingofthattypeofAmericangirl。Itsuddenlycametomethathemustbefindinghisaccountinthis,andIfeltalittlelessregretforthewasteofcivilities,ofattentions,whichsometimesseemedtomebeyondherappreciation。

I,formypart,gavemyselftothestudyofthetypesaboutme,andIdweltlongandluxuriouslyuponthevisionofafloridandmassivematronindiaphanouseveningdress,whomIimaginedtoberevisitingtheglimpsesofhergirlhoodintheancientwatering-place,andtobegettingallthegaietyshecouldoutofit。ThesearethefiguresonemostlyseesatSaratoga;thereisverylittleyouthofthepresentdaythere,buttheyouthofthepastabounds,withthebelatedyellowhairandthepurplemoustaches,whichgaveanotionofgreaterwickednessinaformergeneration。

Imademyobservationthatthedress,eveninextremecasesofelderlyprime,wasverygood——inthecaseofthewomen,Imean;thementhere,aseverywherewithus,weremostlyslovens;andIwasgladtofindthatthegoodtasteandthecorrectfashionwerewithoutacolour-line;thereweresomemulattoladiespresentasstylishastheirwhitesisters,orstep-sisters。

ThemostamiableofthehumanraceisingreatforceatSaratoga,wherethevasthotelserviceiswhollyinitshands,andithadhonouredtheeffortofthecomediansthatnightwithafullhouseoftheirowncomplexion。Wewhowerenotofitshowedstrangelyenoughinthedarkmass,wholetusleadtheapplause,however,asifdoubtfulthemselveswhereitoughttocomein,andwhomIfoundwillingeventosharesomemisplacedlaughterofmine。Theyformedtwo-thirdsoftheaudienceonthefloor,andtheywereacloudinthegallery,scarcelybrokenbyagleamofwhite。

Ientertainedmyselfwiththemagooddeal,andIthoughthowmuchmoredelightfultheywereintheirownkindlycharacterthanintheirassumptionofwhitecharacter,andItriedtodefinemysufferingfromtheperformanceasaneffectfrommytormentedsympathiesratherthanfrommyoffendedtastes。Whenthelongstresswasover,andweroseandstoodtoletthecrowdgetout,I

askedMissGageifshedidnotthinkthismustbethecase。Idonotsupposeshewasreallymuchmoreexperiencedinthetheatrethanthepeopleonthestage,someofwhomIdoubtedtohaveeverseenaplaytilltheytookpartinEastLynne。ButIthoughtIwouldaskherthatinordertohearwhatshewouldsay;andshesaidverysimplythatshehadseensofewplaysshedidnotknowwhattothinkofit,andIcouldseethatshewasabashedbythefact。Kendricksmusthaveseenittoo,forhebeganatoncetosaveherfromherself,withallhissubtlegenerosity,andtoturnhershametopraise。Myheart,whichremainedsufficientlycoldtoher,warmedmorethanevertohim,andIshouldhavelikedtotellherthatherewasthefinestandraresthumanporcelainusingitselflikecommonclayinherbehalf,andtodemandwhethershethoughtshewasworthit。

Ididnotthinkshewas,andIhadaluridmomentwhenIwastemptedtopushonandmakehershowherselfsomehowatherworst。Wehadundertakenapreposterousthinginbefriendingheraswehaddone,andourcourseinbringingKendricksinwaswhollyunjustifiable。

HowcouldIleadherontosomebetrayalofheressentialPhilistinism,andmakehersoimpossibleinhiseyesthatevenhe,withallhissweetnessandgoodness,musttakethefirsttrainfromSaratogainthemorning?

Wehadofcoursejoinedthecrowdinpushingforward;peoplealwaysdo,thoughtheypromisethemselvestowaittillthelastoneisout。

Igotcaughtinadarkeddyonthefirststair-landing;butIcouldseethemfartherdown,andIknewtheywouldwaitformeoutsidethedoor。

WhenIreacheditatlasttheywerenowheretobeseen;Ilookedupthisstreetanddownthat,buttheywerenotinsight。

CHAPTERXII

Ididnotafflictmyselfverymuch,norpretendtodoso。Theyknewthewayhome,andafterIhadblunderedaboutinsearchofthemthroughthelampshotdarkness,Isettledmyselftowalkbackatmyleisure,comfortablysurethatIshouldfindthemontheverandahwaitingformewhenIreachedthehotel。Itwasquiteathicknight,andIalmostranintoacoupleatacornerofourquieterstreetwhenIhadgottoitoutofBroadway。Theyseemedtobestandingandlookingabout,andwhenthemansaid,\"Hemusthavethoughtwetookthefirstturn,\"andthewoman,\"Yes,thatmusthavebeentheway,\"Irecognisedmyestrays。

IthoughtIwouldnotdiscovermyselftothem,butfollowon,andsurprisethembyarrivingatourstepsatthesamemomenttheydid,andIpreparedmyselftohurryafterthem。Buttheyseemedinnohurry,andIhadevensomedifficultyinaccommodatingmypacetotheslownessoftheirs。

\"Won\'tyoutakemyarm,MissGage?\"heaskedastheymovedon。

\"It\'ssoVERYdark,\"sheanswered,andIknewshehadtakenit。\"I

canhardlyseeastep,andpoorMr。Marchwithhisglasses——Idon\'tknowwhathe\'lldo。\"

\"Oh,heonlyusesthemtoreadwith;hecanseeaswellaswecaninthedark。\"

\"He\'sveryyounginhisfeelings,\"saidthegirl;\"heputsmeinmindofmyownfather。\"

\"He\'sveryyounginhisthoughts,\"saidKendricks;\"andthat\'smuchmoretothepurposeforamagazineeditor。Thereareveryfewmenofhisagewhokeepintouchwiththetimesashedoes。\"

\"Still,Mrs。Marchseemsagooddealyounger,don\'tyouthink?I

wonderhowsoontheybegintofeelold?\"

\"Oh,nottillalongintheforties,Ishouldsay。It\'sagooddealintemperament。Idon\'tsupposethateitherofthemrealisesyetthatthey\'reold,andtheymustbenearlyfifty。\"

\"Howstrangeitmustbe,\"saidthegirl,\"fiftyyearsold!Twentyseemsoldenough,goodnessknows。\"

\"Howshouldyouliketobeadotardoftwenty-seven?\"Kendricksasked,andshelaughedathisjoke。

\"Idon\'tsupposeIshouldminditsomuchifIwereaman。\"

IhadpromisedmyselfthatifthetalkbecameatallconfidentialI

woulddropbehindoutofearshot;butthoughitwascuriouslyintimateformetobeputapartinthemindsoftheseyoungpeopleonaccountofmyyearsasnotofthesameraceorfateasthemselves,therewasnothinginwhattheysaidthatImightnotinnocentlyoverhear,asfarastheywereconcerned,andIlistenedon。

Buttheyhadapparentlygivenmequiteenoughattention。Aftersomemutuallaughteratwhatshesaidlast,theyweresilentamoment,andthenhesaidsoberly,\"There\'ssomethingfineinthisisolationthedarkgivesyou,isn\'tthere?You\'reasremoteinitfromourowntimeandplaceasifyouwerewanderingininterplanetaryspace。\"

\"IsupposeweAREdoingthatallthetime——ontheearth,\"shesuggested。

\"Yes;buthowharditistorealisethatweareontheearthnow。

SometimesIhaveasenseofit,though,whenthemoonbreaksfromoneflyingcloudtoanother。ThenitseemsasifIwereapassengeronsomevast,shapelessshipsailingthroughtheair。What,\"heasked,withnorelevancythatIcouldperceive,\"wasthestrangestfeelingYOUeverhad?\"IrememberedaskinggirlssuchquestionswhenIwasyoung,andtheirnotapparentlythinkingitatallodd。

\"Idon\'tknow,\"shereturnedthoughtfully。\"TherewasonetimewhenIwaslittle,andithadsleeted,andthesuncameoutjustbeforeitset,andseemedtosetallthewoodsonfire。Ithoughttheworldwasburningup。\"

\"Itmusthavebeenveryweird,\"saidKendricks;andIthought,\"Oh,goodheavens!Hashegottotalkingofweirdthings?\"

\"It\'sstrange,\"headded,\"howweallhavethatbeliefwhenwearechildrenthattheworldisgoingtoburnup!Idon\'tsupposeanychildescapesit。DoyourememberthatpoemofThompson\'s——theCityofDreadfulNightman——wherehedescribestheendoftheworld?\"

\"No,Ineverreadit。\"

\"Well,merely,hesayswhentheconflagrationbeganthelittleflameslookedlikecrocusesbreakingthroughthesod。IfiteverhappenedIfancyitwouldbequiteassimpleasthat。Butperhapsyoudon\'tlikegloomypoetry?\"

\'Yes,yes,Ido。It\'stheonlykindthatIcareabout。\"

\"Thenyouhatefunnypoetry?\"

\"Ithinkit\'sdisgusting。Papaisalwayscuttingitoutofthepapersandwantingtosendittome,andwehavethegreatestTIMES!\"

\"Isuppose,\"saidKendricks,\"itexpressessomemoods,though。\"

\"Ohyes;itexpressessomemoods;andsometimesitmakesmelaughinspiteofmyself,andashamedofanythingserious。\"

\"That\'salwaystheeffectofafarcewithme。\"

\"ButthenI\'mashamedofbeingashamedafterward,\"saidthegirl。

\"IsupposeyougotothetheatreagreatdealinNewYork。\"

\"It\'saschooloflife,\"saidKendricks。\"Imeantheaudience。\"

\"Iwouldliketogototheoperaonce。Iamgoingtomakepapatakemeinthewinter。\"Shelaughedwithagaysenseofpower,andhesaid-

\"Youseemtobegreatfriendswithyourfather。\"

\"Yes,we\'realwaystogether。Ialwayswenteverywherewithhim;

thisisthefirsttimeI\'vebeenawaywithouthim。ButIthoughtI\'dcomewithMrs。DeeringandseewhatSaratogawaslike;Ihadneverbeenhere。\"

\"Andisitlikewhatyouthought?\"

\"No。Thefirstweekwedidn\'tdoanything。ThenwegotacquaintedwithMr。andMrs。March,andIbegantoreallyseesomething。ButI

supposeditwasallballsandgaiety。\"

\"Wemustgetupafewifyou\'resofondofthem,\"Kendricksplayfullysuggested。

\"Oh,Idon\'tknowasIam。Ineverwentmuchathome。Papadidn\'tcaretohaveme。\"

\"Ah,doyouthinkitwasrightforhimtokeepyoualltohimself?\"

Thegirldidnotanswer,andtheyhadbothhaltedsoabruptlythatI

almostranintothem。\"Idon\'tquitemakeoutwhereweare。\"

Kendricksseemedtobepeeringabout。Iplungedacrossthestreetlestheshouldaskme。Iheardhimadd,\"Ohyes;Iknownow,\"andthentheypressedforward。