第2章

MadanaAlas,thoudaughterofmortals!IstolefromthedivineStorehousethefragrantwineofheaven,filledwithitoneearthlynighttothebrim,andplaceditinthyhandtodrink——

yetstillIhearthiscryofanguish!

Chitra[bitterly]

Whodrankit?Therarestcompletionoflife’sdesire,thefirstunionoflovewasprofferedtome,butwaswrestedfrommygrasp?

Thisborrowedbeauty,thisfalsehoodthatenwrapsme,willslipfrommetakingwithittheonlymonumentofthatsweetunion,asthepetalsfallfromanoverblownflower;andthewomanashamedofhernakedpovertywillsitweepingdayandnight。LordLove,thiscursedappearancecompanionsmelikeademonrobbingmeofalltheprizesoflove——allthekissesforwhichmyheartisathirst。

MadanaAlas,howvainthysinglenighthadbeen!Thebarqueofjoycameinsight,butthewaveswouldnotletittouchtheshore。

ChitraHeavencamesoclosetomyhandthatIforgotforamomentthatithadnotreachedme。ButwhenIwokeinthemorningfrommydreamIfoundthatmybodyhadbecomemyownrival。Itismyhatefultasktodeckhereveryday,tosendhertomybelovedandseehercaressedbyhim。Ogod,takebackthyboon!

MadanaButifItakeitfromyouhowcanyoustandbeforeyourlover?

Tosnatchawaythecupfromhislipswhenhehasscarcelydrainedhisfirstdraughtofpleasure,wouldnotthatbecruel?Withwhatresentfulangerhemustregardtheethen?

ChitraThatwouldbebetterfarthanthis。Iwillrevealmytrueselftohim,anoblerthingthanthisdisguise。Ifherejectsit,ifhespurnsmeandbreaksmyheart,Iwillbeareventhatinsilence。

VasantaListentomyadvice。Whenwiththeadventofautumnthefloweringseasonisoverthencomesthetriumphoffruitage。A

timewillcomeofitselfwhentheheat—cloyedbloomofthebodywilldroopandArjunawillgladlyaccepttheabidingfruitfultruthinthee。Ochild,gobacktothymadfestival。

SCENEIV

ChitraWHYdoyouwatchmelikethat,mywarrior?

ArjunaIwatchhowyouweavethatgarland。Skillandgrace,thetwinbrotherandsister,aredancingplayfullyonyourfingertips。I

amwatchingandthinking。

ChitraWhatareyouthinking,sir?

ArjunaIamthinkingthatyou,withthissamelightnessoftouchandsweetness,areweavingmydaysofexileintoanimmortalwreath,tocrownmewhenIreturnhome。

ChitraHome!Butthisloveisnotforahome!

ArjunaNotforahome?

ChitraNo。Nevertalkofthat。Taketoyourhomewhatisabidingandstrong。Leavethelittlewildflowerwhereitwasborn;leaveitbeautifullytodieattheday’sendamongallfadingblossomsanddecayingleaves。Donottakeittoyourpalacehalltoflingitonthestonyfloorwhichknowsnopityforthingsthatfadeandareforgotten。

ArjunaIsoursthatkindoflove?

ChitraYes,noother!Whyregretit?Thatwhichwasmeantforidledaysshouldneveroutlivethem。Joyturnsintopainwhenthedoorbywhichitshoulddepartisshutagainstit。Takeitandkeepitaslongasitlasts。Letnotthesatietyofyoureveningclaimmorethanthedesireofyourmorningcouldearn……Thedayisdone。Putthisgarlandon。Iamtired。Takemeinyourarms,mylove。Letallvainbickeringsofdiscontentdieawayatthesweetmeetingofourlips。

ArjunaHush!Listen,mybeloved,thesoundofprayerbellsfromthedistantvillagetemplestealsupontheeveningairacrossthesilenttrees!

SCENEV

VasantaICANNOTkeeppacewiththee,myfriend!Iamtired。Itisahardtasktokeepalivethefirethouhastkindled。Sleepovertakesme,thefandropsfrommyhand,andcoldashescovertheglowofthefire。Istartupagainfrommyslumberandwithallmymightrescuethewearyflame。Butthiscangoonnolonger。

MadanaIknow,thouartasfickleasachild。Everrestlessisthyplayinheavenandonearth。Thingsthatthoufordaysbuildestupwithendlessdetailthoudostshatterinamomentwithoutregret。

Butthisworkofoursisnearlyfinished。Pleasure—wingeddaysflyfast,andtheyear,almostatitsend,swoonsinrapturousbliss。

SCENEVI

ArjunaIWOKEinthemorningandfoundthatmydreamshaddistilledagem。Ihavenocaskettoincloseit,noking’scrownwhereontofixit,nochainfromwhichtohangit,andyethavenotthehearttothrowitaway。MyKshatriya’srightarm,idlyoccupiedinholdingit,forgetsitsduties。

EnterCHITRA。

ChitraTellmeyourthoughts,sir!

ArjunaMymindisbusywiththoughtsofhuntingtoday。See,howtherainpoursintorrentsandfiercelybeatsuponthehillside。Thedarkshadowofthecloudshangsheavilyovertheforest,andtheswollenstream,likerecklessyouth,overleapsallbarrierswithmockinglaughter。OnsuchrainydayswefivebrotherswouldgototheChitrakaforesttochasewildbeasts。Thoseweregladtimes。Ourheartsdancedtothedrumbeatofrumblingclouds。Thewoodsresoundedwiththescreamsofpeacocks。Timiddeercouldnothearourapproachingstepsforthepatterofrainandthenoiseofwaterfalls;theleopardswouldleavetheirtracksonthewetearth,betrayingtheirlairs。Oursportover,wedaredeachothertoswimacrossturbulentstreamsonourwaybackhome。Therestlessspiritisonme。Ilongtogohunting。

ChitraFirstrundownthequarryyouarenowfollowing。Areyouquitecertainthattheenchanteddeeryoupursuemustneedsbecaught?

No,notyet。Likeadreamthewildcreatureeludesyouwhenitseemsmostnearlyyours。Lookhowthewindischasedbythemadrainthatdischargesathousandarrowsafterit。Yetitgoesfreeandunconquered。Oursportislikethat,mylove!Yougivechasetothefleet—footedspiritofbeauty,aimingathereverydartyouhaveinyourhands。Yetthismagicdeerrunseverfreeanduntouched。

ArjunaMylove,haveyounohomewherekindheartsarewaitingforyourreturn?Ahomewhichyouoncemadesweetwithyourgentleserviceandwhoselightwentoutwhenyouleftitforthiswilderness?

ChitraWhythesequestions?Arethehoursofunthinkingpleasureover?

DoyounotknowthatIamnomorethanwhatyouseebeforeyou?

Formethereisnovistabeyond。ThedewthathangsonthetipofaKinsukapetalhasneithernamenordestination。Itoffersnoanswertoanyquestion。Shewhomyouloveislikethatperfectbeadofdew。

ArjunaHasshenotiewiththeworld?Canshebemerelylikeafragmentofheavendroppedontheearththroughthecarelessnessofawantongod?

ChitraYes。

ArjunaAh,thatiswhyIalwaysseemabouttoloseyou。Myheartisunsatisfied,mymindknowsnopeace。Comeclosertome,unattainableone!Surrenderyourselftothebondsofnameandhomeandparentage。Letmyheartfeelyouonallsidesandlivewithyouinthepeacefulsecurityoflove。

ChitraWhythisvainefforttocatchandkeepthetintsoftheclouds,thedanceofthewaves,thesmelloftheflowers?

ArjunaMistressmine,donothopetopacifylovewithairynothings。

Givemesomethingtoclasp,somethingthatcanlastlongerthanpleasure,thatcanendureeventhroughsuffering。

ChitraHeromine,theyearisnotyetfull,andyouaretiredalready!

NowIknowthatitisHeaven’sblessingthathasmadetheflower’stermoflifeshort。Couldthisbodyofminehavedroopedanddiedwiththeflowersoflastspringitsurelywouldhavediedwithhonour。Yet,itsdaysarenumbered,mylove。

Spareitnot,pressitdryofhoney,forfearyourbeggar’sheartcomebacktoitagainandagainwithunsateddesire,likeathirstybeewhensummerblossomsliedeadinthedust。

SCENEVII

MadanaTONIGHTisthylastnight。

VasantaThelovelinessofyourbodywillreturntomorrowtotheinexhaustiblestoresofthespring。TheruddytintofthylipsfreedfromthememoryofArjuna’skisses,willbudanewasapairoffreshasokaleaves,andthesoft,whiteglowofthyskinwillbebornagaininahundredfragrantjasmineflowers。

ChitraOgods,grantmethismyprayer!Tonight,initslasthourletmybeautyflashitsbrightest,likethefinalflickerofadyingflame。

MadanaThoushalthavethywish。

SCENEVIII

VillagersWHOwillprotectusnow?

ArjunaWhy,bywhatdangerareyouthreatened?

VillagersTherobbersarepouringfromthenorthernhillslikeamountainfloodtodevastateourvillage。

ArjunaHaveyouinthiskingdomnowarden?

VillagersPrincessChitrawastheterrorofallevildoers。Whileshewasinthishappylandwefearednaturaldeaths,buthadnootherfears。Nowshehasgoneonapilgrimage,andnoneknowswheretofindher。

ArjunaIsthewardenofthiscountryawoman?

VillagersYes,sheisourfatherandmotherinone。

[Exeunt。

EnterCHITRA。

ChitraWhyareyousittingallalone?

ArjunaIamtryingtoimaginewhatkindofwomanPrincessChitramaybe。

Ihearsomanystoriesofherfromallsortsofmen。

ChitraAh,butsheisnotbeautiful。Shehasnosuchlovelyeyesasmine,darkasdeath。Shecanpierceanytargetshewill,butnotourhero’sheart。

ArjunaTheysaythatinvaloursheisaman,andawomanintenderness。

ChitraThat,indeed,ishergreatestmisfortune。Whenawomanismerelyawoman;whenshewindsherselfroundandroundmen’sheartswithhersmilesandsobsandservicesandcaressingendearments;thensheishappy。Ofwhatusetoherarelearningandgreatachievements?CouldyouhaveseenheronlyyesterdayinthecourtoftheLordShiva’stemplebytheforestpath,youwouldhavepassedbywithoutdeigningtolookather。Buthaveyougrownsowearyofwoman’sbeautythatyouseekinherforaman’sstrength?

Withgreenleaveswetfromthesprayofthefoamingwaterfall,I

havemadeournoondaybedinacaverndarkasnight。Therethecoolofthesoftgreenmossesthickontheblackanddrippingstone,kissesyoureyestosleep。Letmeguideyouthither。

ArjunaNottoday,beloved。

ChitraWhynottoday?

ArjunaIhaveheardthatahordeofrobbershasnearedtheplains。

NeedsmustIgoandpreparemyweaponstoprotectthefrightenedvillagers。

ChitraYouneedhavenofearforthem。Beforeshestartedonherpilgrimage,PrincessChitrahadsetstrongguardsatallthefrontierpasses。

ArjunaYetpermitmeforashortwhiletosetaboutaKshatriya’swork。

WithnewglorywillIennoblethisidlearm,andmakeofitapillowmoreworthyofyourhead。

ChitraWhatifIrefusetoletyougo,ifIkeepyouentwinedinmyarms?Wouldyourudelysnatchyourselffreeandleaveme?Gothen!Butyoumustknowthattheliana,oncebrokenintwo,neverjoinsagain。Go,ifyourthirstisquenched。But,ifnot,thenrememberthatthegoddessofpleasureisfickle,andwaitsfornoman。Sitforawhile,mylord!Tellmewhatuneasythoughtsteaseyou。Whooccupiedyourmindtoday?IsitChitra?

ArjunaYes,itisChitra。Iwonderinfulfilmentofwhatvowshehasgoneonherpilgrimage。Ofwhatcouldshestandinneed?

ChitraHerneeds?Why,whathassheeverhad,theunfortunatecreature?

Herveryqualitiesareasprisonwalls,shuttingherwoman’sheartinabarecell。Sheisobscured,sheisunfulfilled。Herwomanlylovemustcontentitselfdressedinrags;beautyisdeniedher。Sheislikethespiritofacheerlessmorning,sittinguponthestonymountainpeak,allherlightblottedoutbydarkclouds。Donotaskmeofherlife。Itwillneversoundsweettoman’sear。

ArjunaIameagertolearnallabouther。Iamlikeatravellercometoastrangecityatmidnight。Domesandtowersandgarden—treeslookvagueandshadowy,andthedullmoanoftheseacomesfitfullythroughthesilenceofsleep。Wistfullyhewaitsforthemorningtorevealtohimallthestrangewonders。Oh,tellmeherstory。

ChitraWhatmoreistheretotell?

ArjunaIseemtoseeher,inmymind’seye,ridingonawhitehorse,proudlyholdingthereinsinherlefthand,andinherrightabow,andliketheGoddessofVictorydispensinggladhopeallroundher。Likeawatchfullionesssheprotectsthelitteratherdugswithafiercelove。Woman’sarms,thoughadornedwithnaughtbutunfetteredstrength,arebeautiful!Myheartisrestless,fairone,likeaserpentrevivingfromhislongwinter’ssleep。Come,letusbothraceonswifthorsessidebyside,liketwinorbsoflightsweepingthroughspace。Outfromthisslumbrousprisonofgreengloom,thisdank,densecoverofperfumedintoxication,chokingbreath。

ChitraArjuna,tellmetrue,if,nowatonce,bysomemagicIcouldshakemyselffreefromthisvoluptuoussoftness,thistimidbloomofbeautyshrinkingfromtherudeandhealthytouchoftheworld,andflingitfrommybodylikeborrowedclothes,wouldyoubeabletobearit?IfIstandupstraightandstrongwiththestrengthofadaringheartspurningthewilesandartsoftwiningweakness,ifIholdmyheadhighlikeatallyoungmountainfir,nolongertrailinginthedustlikealiana,shallIthenappealtoman’seye?No,no,youcouldnotendureit。ItisbetterthatIshouldkeepspreadaboutmeallthedaintyplaythingsoffugitiveyouth,andwaitforyouinpatience。Whenitpleasesyoutoreturn,Iwillsmilinglypouroutforyouthewineofpleasureinthecupofthisbeauteousbody。Whenyouaretiredandsatiatedwiththiswine,youcangotoworkorplay;andwhenIgrowoldIwillaccepthumblyandgratefullywhatevercornerisleftforme。Woulditpleaseyourheroicsouliftheplaymateofthenightaspiredtobethehelpmeetoftheday,iftheleftarmlearnttosharetheburdenoftheproudrightarm?

ArjunaIneverseemtoknowyouaright。Youseemtomelikeagoddesshiddenwithinagoldenimage。Icannottouchyou,Icannotpayyoumyduesinreturnforyourpricelessgifts。Thusmyloveisincomplete。Sometimesintheenigmaticdepthofyoursadlook,inyourplayfulwordsmockingattheirownmeaning,Igainglimpsesofabeingtryingtorendasunderthelanguorousgraceofherbody,toemergeinachastefireofpainthroughavaporousveilofsmiles。IllusionisthefirstappearanceofTruth。Sheadvancestowardsherloverindisguise。Butatimecomeswhenshethrowsoffherornamentsandveilsandstandsclothedinnakeddignity。Igropeforthatultimateyou,thatbaresimplicityoftruth。

Whythesetears,mylove?Whycoveryourfacewithyourhands?

HaveIpainedyou,mydarling?ForgetwhatIsaid。Iwillbecontentwiththepresent。Leteachseparatemomentofbeautycometomelikeabirdofmysteryfromitsunseennestinthedarkbearingamessageofmusic。Letmeforeversitwithmyhopeonthebrinkofitsrealization,andthusendmydays。

SCENEIX

CHITRAandARJUNA

Chitra[cloaked]

Mylord,hasthecupbeendrainedtothelastdrop?Isthis,indeed,theend?No,whenallisdonesomethingstillremains,andthatismylastsacrificeatyourfeet。

Ibroughtfromthegardenofheavenflowersofincomparablebeautywithwhichtoworshipyou,godofmyheart。Iftheritesareover,iftheflowershavefaded,letmethrowthemoutofthetemple[unveilinginheroriginalmaleattire]。Now,lookatyourworshipperwithgraciouseyes。

IamnotbeautifullyperfectastheflowerswithwhichI

worshipped。Ihavemanyflawsandblemishes。Iamatravellerinthegreatworld—path,mygarmentsaredirty,andmyfeetarebleedingwiththorns。WhereshouldIachieveflower—beauty,theunsulliedlovelinessofamoment’slife?ThegiftthatIproudlybringyouistheheartofawoman。Herehaveallpainsandjoysgathered,thehopesandfearsandshamesofadaughterofthedust;herelovespringsupstrugglingtowardimmortallife。Hereinliesanimperfectionwhichyetisnobleandgrand。Iftheflower—serviceisfinished,mymaster,acceptthisasyourservantforthedaystocome!

IamChitra,theking’sdaughter。PerhapsyouwillrememberthedaywhenawomancametoyouinthetempleofShiva,herbodyloadedwithornamentsandfinery。Thatshamelesswomancametocourtyouasthoughshewereaman。Yourejectedher;youdidwell。Mylord,Iamthatwoman。Shewasmydisguise。ThenbytheboonofgodsIobtainedforayearthemostradiantformthatamortaleverwore,andweariedmyhero’sheartwiththeburdenofthatdeceit。MostsurelyIamnotthatwoman。

IamChitra。Nogoddesstobeworshipped,noryettheobjectofcommonpitytobebrushedasidelikeamothwithindifference。Ifyoudeigntokeepmebyyoursideinthepathofdangeranddaring,ifyouallowmetosharethegreatdutiesofyourlife,thenyouwillknowmytrueself。Ifyourbabe,whomIamnourishinginmywombbebornason,IshallmyselfteachhimtobeasecondArjuna,andsendhimtoyouwhenthetimecomes,andthenatlastyouwilltrulyknowme。TodayIcanonlyofferyouChitra,thedaughterofaking。

ArjunaBeloved,mylifeisfull。