CONTENTS
I。ALiberalEducationII。CordialRelationsIII。RetributionIV。ThePerversenessofItV。AMatterofDutyVI。MyLastChanceVII。TheLittleWretchVIII。AnExpensivePrivilegeIX。AVeryDullAffairX。StrangebutTrueXI。TheVeryLatestThingXII。AnUncountedHourXIII。AReminiscenceXIV。AFineDayXV。TheHouseOppositeXVI。AQuickChangeXVII。ASlightMistakeXVIII。TheOtherLadyXIX。WhatMightHaveBeenXX。OneWayInALIBERALEDUCATION
\"There’singratitudeforyou!\"MissDollyFosterexclaimedsuddenly。
\"Where!\"Iasked，rousingmyselffrommeditation。
Shepointedtoayoungmanwhohadjustpassedwherewesat。Hewasdressedverysmartly，andwaswalkingwithaladyattiredintheheightofthefashion。
\"Imadethatman，\"saidDolly，\"andnowhecutsmedeadbeforethewholeoftheRow!It’satrocious。Why，butforme，doyousupposehe’dbeatthismomentengagedtothreethousandayearand——andtheplainestgirlinLondon？\"
\"Notthat，\"Ipleaded；\"thinkof——\"
\"Well，veryplainanyhow。Iwasquitereadytobowtohim。
Ialmostdid。\"
\"Infactyoudid？\"
\"Ididn’t。IdeclareIdidn’t。\"
\"Oh，well，youdidn’tthen。Itonlylookedlikeit。\"
\"Imethim，\"saidMissDolly，\"threeyearsago。Atthattimehewas——oh，quiteunpresentable。Hewaseverythingheshouldn’tbe。
Hewasateetotaler，youknow，andhedidn’tsmoke，andhewasalwaysgoingtoconcerts。Oh，andheworehishairlong，andhistrousersshort，andhishatonthebackofhishead。Andhisumbrella——\"
\"Wheredidhewearthat？\"
\"Hecarriedthat，Mr。Carter。Don’tbesilly!Carrieditunrolled，youknow，andgenerallyapaperparcelintheotherhand；andhehadspectaclestoo。\"
\"Hehascertainlychanged，outwardlyatleast。
\"Yes，Iknow；well，Ididthat。Itookhiminhand，andIjusttaughthim，andnow——!\"
\"Yes，Iknowthat。Buthowdidyouteachhim？GivehimSaturdayeveninglectures，orwhat？\"
\"Oh，every—eveninglectures，andmost—morningwalks。AndI
taughthimtodance，andbrokehiswretchedfiddlewithmyownhands!\"
\"Whatveryarbitrarydistinctionsyoudraw!\"
\"Idon’tknowthatyoumean。Idolikeamantobesmart，anyhow。Don’tyou，Mr。Carter？You’renotsosmartasyoumightbe。Now，shallItakeyouinhand？\"Andshesmileduponme。
\"Let’shearyourmethod。Whatdidyoudotohim。？\"
\"ToPhilMeadows？Oh，nothing。Ijustslippedinaremarkhereandthere，wheneverhetalkednonsense。Iusedtospeakjustattherighttime，youknow。\"
\"Buthowhadyourwordssuchinfluence，MissFoster？\"
\"Oh，well，youknow，Mr。Carter，ImadeitaconditionthatheshoulddojustwhatIwantedinlittlethingslikethat。DidhethinkIwasgoingtowalkaboutwithamancarryingabrownpaperparcel——asifwehadbeentotheshopforapoundoftea？\"
\"Still，Idon’tseewhyheshouldalterallhis——\"
\"Oh，youarestupid!Ofcourse，helikedme，youknow。\"
\"Oh，didhe？Isee。\"
\"Youseemtothinkthatveryfunny。\"
\"Notthathedid——butthat，apparently，hedoesn’t。\"
\"Wellyougotoutofthatratherneatly——foryou。No，hedoesn’tnow。Yousee，hemisunderstoodmymotive。Hethought——well，I
dobelievehethoughtIcaredforhim，youknow。OfcourseI
didn’t。\"
\"Notabit？\"
\"Justasafriend——andapupil，youknow。Andwhenhe’dhadhishaircutandboughtafrockcoat（fancyhe’dneverhadone!），helookedquitenice。Hehasniceeyes。Didyounoticethem。\"
\"Lord，no!\"
\"Well，you’resounobservant。\"
\"Oh，notalways。I’veobservedthatyour——\"
\"Pleasedon’t!It’snouse，isit？\"
Ilookedveryunhappy。ThereisanunderstandingthatIamveryunhappysinceMissFoster’sengagementtotheEarlofMicklehamwasannounced。
\"WhatwasIsayingbefore——beforeyou——youknow——oh，aboutPhilMeadows，ofcourse。Ididlikehimverymuch，youknow，orI
shouldn’thavetakenallthattrouble。Why，hisownmotherthankedme!\"
\"Ihavenomoretosay，\"saidI。
\"Butshewrotemeahorridletterafterward。\"
\"You’resoveryelliptical。\"
\"Soverywhat，Mr。Carter？\"
\"Youleavesomuchout，Imean。Afterwhat？\"
\"Why，afterIsenthimaway。Didn’tItellyou？Oh，wehadthemostawfulscene。Heraved，Mr。Carter。Hecalledmethemosthorridnames，and——\"
\"Torehishair？\"
\"Itwasn’tlongenoughtogetholdof，\"shetittered。\"Butdon’tlaugh。Itwasreallydreadful。Andsounjust!Andthen，nextday，whenIthoughtitwascomfortablyover，youknow，hecameback，and——andapologized，andcalledhimselfthemostawfulnames，and——well，thatwasreallyworse。\"
\"Whatdidthefellowcomplainof？\"Iaskedinwonderingtones。
\"Oh，hesaidI’ddestroyedhisfaithinwomen，youknow，andthatI’dledhimon，andthatIwas——well，hewasveryrudeindeed。
Andhewentonwritingmeletterslikethatforawholeyear？Itmademequiteuncomfortable。\"
\"Buthedidn’tgobacktoshorttrousersandafiddle，didhe？\"I
askedanxiously。
\"Oh，no。Butheforgotallheowedme，andhetoldmethathisheartwasdead，andthatheshouldneverloveanyoneagain。\"
\"Buthe’sgoingtomarrythatgirl。\"
\"Oh，hedoesn’tcareabouther，\"saidMissDollyreassuringly。
\"It’sthemoney，youknow。Hehadn’tafarthingofhisown。
Nowhe’llbesetupforlife。\"
\"Andit’sallduetoyou!\"saidIadmiringly。
\"Well，itis，really。\"
\"Idon’tcallhersuchabad—lookinggirl，though。\"（Ihadn’tseenherface。）
\"Mr。Carter!She’shideous!\"
Idroppedthatsubject。
\"Andnow，\"saidMissDollyagain，\"hecutsmedead!\"
\"Itistheheightofingratitude。Why，toloveyouwasaliberaleducation!\"
\"Yes，wasn’tit？Hownicelyyouputthat。Aliberaleducation!’
IshalltellArchie。\"（ArchieisLordMickleham。）
\"What，aboutPhilMeadows？\"
\"Goodnessme，no，Mr。Carter。Justwhatyousaid，youknow。\"
\"ButwhynottellMicklehamaboutPhilMeadows？\"Iurged。\"It’salltoyourcredit，youknow。\"
\"Iknow，butmenaresofoolish。Yousee，Archiethinks——\"
\"Ofcoursehedoes。\"
\"Youmightletmefinish。\"
\"Archiethinksyouwereneverinlovebefore。\"
\"Yes，hedoes。Well，ofcourse，Iwasn’tinlovewithPhil——\"
\"Notalittlebit？\"
\"Oh，well——\"
\"Norwithanyoneelse？\"
MissDollylookedforaninstantinmydirection。
\"Norwithanyoneelse？saidI。
MissDollylookedstraightinfrontofher。
\"Norwith——\"Ibegan。
\"Hullo，oldchappie，wheredidyouspringfrom？\"
\"Why，Archie!\"criedMissDolly。
\"Oh，howareyou，Mickleham，oldman？Takethisseat；I’mjustoff——justoff。Yes，Iwas，uponmyhonor——gottomeetamanattheclub。Goodbye，MissFoster。Jove!I’mlate!\"
AndasIwentIheardMissDollysay，\"Ithoughtyouwerenevercoming，Archie，dear!\"Well，shedidn’tthinkhewascomingjustthen。NomoredidI。
CORDIALRELATIONS
TheotherdayIpaidacallonMissDollyFosterforthepurposeofpresentingtohermysmallofferingontheoccasionofhermarriagetoLordMickleham。Itwasaprettylittlebitofjewelry——apearlheart，broken（rubiesplayedthepartofblood）
andheldtogetherbyagoldpin，setwithdiamonds，thewholesurmountedbyanearl’scoronet。Ihadtakensometroubleaboutit，andwasgratefulwhenMissDollyaskedmetoexplainthesymbolism。
\"Itismyheart，\"Iobserved。\"Thefractureisyourmaking；thepin——\"
HereMissDollyinterrupted；totellthetruthIwasnotsorry，forIwasfairlygraveledforthemeaningofthepin。
\"Whatnonsense，Mr。Carter!\"shesaid；\"butit’sawfullypretty。
Thankssoveryverymuch。Aren’trelationsfunnypeople？\"
\"Ifyouwishtochangethesubject，praydo，\"saidI。\"I’llchangeanythingexceptmyaffections。\"
\"Lookhere，\"shepursued，holdingoutabundleofletters。\"Herearethecongratulatoryepistlesfromrelations。ShallIreadyouafew？\"
\"Itwillbeamostagreeablemodeofpassingthetime，\"saidI。
\"ThisisfromAuntGeorgiana——she’sawidow——livesatCheltenham。
’MydearestDorothea——’\"
\"Who？\"
\"Dorothea’smyname，Mr。Carter。Itmeansthegiftofheaven，youknow。\"
\"’MydearestDorothea，IhaveheardthenewsofyourengagementtoLordMicklehamwithdeepthankfulness。Toobtaintheloveofanhonestmanisagreatprize。Ihopeyouwillproveworthyofit。Marriageisatrialandanopportunity——’\"
\"Hear，hear!\"saidI。\"Atrialforthehusbandand——\"
\"Bequiet，Mr。Carter。’Atrialandanopportunity。Itsearchestheheartandaffordsasphereofusefulnesswhich——’Soshegoeson，youknow。Idon’tseewhyIneedbelecturedjustbecauseI’mgoingtobemarried，doyou，Mr。Carter？\"
\"Let’stryanother，\"saidI。\"Who’sthatonpinkpaper？\"
\"Oh，that’sGeorgyVane。She’sawfulfun。’DearoldDolly，——Soyou’vebroughtitoff。Heartycongrats。Ithoughtyouweregoingtobesillyandthrowaway——’There’snothingelsethere，Mr。Carter。Lookhere。Listentothis。It’sfromUncleWilliam。He’saclergyman，youknow。’MydearNiece，——Ihaveheardwithgreatgratificationofyourengagement。YourauntandIuniteinallgoodwishes。IrecollectLordMickleham’sfatherwhenIhadacuracynearWorcester。Hewasaregularattendantatchurchandasupporterofallgoodworksinthediocese。Ifonlyhissontakesafterhim（fancyArchie!）Youhavesecuredaprize。Ihopeyouhaveapropersenseoftheresponsibilitiesyouareundertaking。Marriageaffordsnosmallopportunities，italsoentailscertaintrials——’\"
\"Why，you’rereadingAuntGeorgianaagain。\"
\"AmI？No，it’sUncleWilliam。\"
\"Thenlet’stryafreshcast——unlessyou’llfinishGeorgyVane’s。\"
\"Well，here’sCousinSusan’s。She’sanoldmaid，youknow。It’sverylong。Here’sabit：’Womanhasitinherpowertoexerciseasacredinfluence。IhavenotthepleasureofknowingLordMickleham，butIhope，mydear，thatyouwilluseyourpoweroverhimforgood。Itisuselessformetodenythatwhenyoustayedwithme，Ithoughtyouwereaddictedtofrivolity。Doubtlessmarriagewillsoberyou。TrytomakeagooduseofitslessonsIamsendingyouabiscuittin’——andsoon。\"
\"Averyproperletter，\"saidI。
MissDollyindulgedinaslightgrimace，andtookupanotherletter。
\"This，\"shesaid，\"isfrommysister—in—law，Mrs。AlgernonFoster。\"
\"AdaughterofLordDoldrums，wasn’tshe？\"
\"Yes。’MydearDorothea，——Ihaveheardyournews。Idohopeitwillturnouthappily。Ibelievethatanywomanwhoconscientiouslydoesherdutycanfindhappinessinmarriedlife。
Herhusbandandchildrenoccupyallhertimeandallherthoughts，andifshecanlookforfewofthelighterpleasuresoflife，shehasatleasttheknowledgethatsheisofuseintheworld。Pleaseaccepttheaccompanyingvolumes（it’sBrowning）asasmall——’Isay，Mr。Carter，doyouthinkit’sreallylikethat？\"
\"Thereisstilltimetodrawback，\"Iobserved。
\"Oh，don’tbesilly。Here，thisismybrotherTom’s。’DearDol，——IthoughtMicklehamratheranasswhenImethim，butI
daresayyouknowbest。What’shisplacelike？Doeshetakeamoor？IthoughtIreadthathekeptayacht。Doeshe？Givehimmyloveandakiss。Goodluck，oldgirl。Tom。P。S。——I’mgladit’snotme，youknow。’\"
\"Adisgustingletter，\"Iobserved。
\"Notatall，\"saidMissDolly，dimpling。\"It’sjustlikedearoldTom。Listentograndpapa’s。’MydearGranddaughter，——Thealliance’（Iratherlikeit’sbeingcalledanalliance，Mr。
Carter。ItsoundsliketheRoyalFamily，doesn’tit？）’youareabouttocontractisinallrespectsasuitableone。Isendyoumyblessingandasmallchecktohelptowardsyourtrousseau。——Yoursaffectionately，Jno。Wm。Foster。’\"
\"That，\"saidI，\"isthebestuptonow。\"
\"Yes，it’s500，\"saidshe，smiling。\"Here’soldLadyM。’s。\"
\"Whose？\"Iexclaimed。
\"Archie’smother’s，youknow。’MydearDorothea（asIsupposeI
mustcallyounow）——Archibaldhasinformedusofhisengagement，andIandthegirls（therearefivegirls，Mr。Carter）hastentowelcomehisbride。IamsureArchiewillmakehiswifeveryhappy。Heisratherparticular（likehisdearfather），buthehasagoodheart，andisnotfidgetyabouthismeals。OfcourseweshallbedelightedtomoveoutofTheTowersatonce。Ihopeweshallseeagreatdealofyousoon。Archieisfullofyourpraises，andwethoroughlytrusthistaste。Archie——’It’sallaboutArchie，yousee。\"
\"Naturally，\"saidI。
\"Well，Idon’tknow。IsupposeIcountalittle，too。Oh，lookhere。Here’sCousinFred’s，buthe’salwayssosilly。Ishan’treadyouhis。\"
\"O，justabitofit，\"Ipleaded。
\"Well，here’sonebit。’IsupposeIcan’tmurderhim，soImustwishhimjoy。AllIcansayis，Dolly，thathe’stheluckiest（somethingIcan’tread——eitherfellowor——devil）Ieverheardof。Iwonderifyou’veforgottenthatevening——’\"
\"Well，goon。\"Forshestopped。
\"Oh，there’snothingelse。\"
\"Infact，youhaveforgottentheevening？\"
\"Entirely，\"saidMissDolly，tossingherhead。
\"Buthesendsmealoveofabracelet。Hecan’tpossiblypayforit，poorboy。\"
\"Youngknave!\"saidIseverely。（Ihadpaidformypearlheart。）
\"Thencomesalotfromgirls。Oh，there’sonefromMaudTottenham——she’sasecondcousin，youknow——it’sratheramusing。
’IusedtoknowyourFIANCEslightly。Heseemedverynice，butit’salongwhileago，andIneversawmuchofhim。Ihopeheisreallyfondofyou，andthatitisnotamerefancy。Sinceyoulovehimsomuch，itwouldbeapityifhedidnotcaredeeplyforyou。’\"
\"Interpret，MissDolly，\"saidI。
\"Shetriedtocatchhimherself，\"saidMissDolly。
\"Ah，Isee。Isthatall？\"
\"Theothersaren’tveryinteresting。\"
\"Thenlet’sfinishGeorgyVane’s。\"
\"Really？\"sheasked，smiling。
\"Yes。Really。\"
\"Oh，ifyoudon；’tmind，Idon’t，\"saidshe，laughing，andshehuntedoutthepinknoteandspreaditbeforeher。
\"Letmesee。WherewasI？Oh，here。’Ithoughtyouweregoingtobesillyandthrowawayyourchancesonsomeofthemenwhousedtoflirtwithyou。ArchieMicklehammaynotbeagenius，buthe’sagoodfellowandaswellandrich；andhe’snotapauper，likePhilMeadows，orasnoblikeCharlieDawson，or——’shallIgoon，Mr。Carter？No，Iwon’t。Ididn’tseewhatitwas。\"
\"Yes，youshallgoon。\"
\"O，no，Ican’t，\"andshefoldeduptheletter。\"ThenIwill，\"
andI’mashamedtosayIsnatchedtheletter。MissDollyjumpedtoherfeet。Ifledbehindthetable。Sheranround。Idodged。
\"’Or’\"Ibegantoread。
\"Stop!\"criedshe。
\"’Orayoungspendthriftlikethatman——Iforgethisname——whoyouusedtogoonwithatsuchapaceatMonteCarlolastwinter。’\"
\"Stop!\"shecried。\"Youmuststop，Mr。Carter。\"
SothenIstopped。Ifoldedtheletterandhandeditbacktoher。Hercheeksflushedredasshetookit。
\"Ithoughtyouwereagentleman，\"saidshe，bitingherlip。
\"IwasatMonteCarlolastwintermyself，\"saidI。
\"LordMickleham，\"saidthebutler，throwingopenthedoor。
RETRIBUTION
InfutureIamgoingtobecarefulwhatIdo。Iamalso——andthisisbynomeanslessimportant——goingtobeverycarefulwhatMissDollyFosterdoes。Everybodyknows（ifImayquoteherparticularfriendNelliePhaeton）thatdearDollymeansnoharm，butsheis\"justalittleharumscarum。\"IthankedMissPhaetonfortheexpression。
Thefactisthat\"oldladyM。\"（HereIquoteMissDolly）sentformetheotherday。IhavenotthehonorofknowingtheCountess，andIwentinsometrepidation。WhenIwasusheredin，LadyMicklehamputupher\"starers。\"（Youknowthoseabominations!
Pince—nezwithlongtorture——Imeantortoise——shellhandles。）
\"Mr。——er——Carter？\"saidshe。
Ibowed。IwouldhavedenieditifIcould。
\"Mydears!\"saidLadyMickleham。
Uponthisfiveyoungladieswhohadbeensittinginfivestraight—backedchairs，doingfivepiecesofembroidery，rose，bowed，andfiledoutoftheroom。Ifeltverynervous。
Apausefollowed。ThentheCountessobserved——anditseemedatfirstratherirrelevant——
\"I’vebeenreadinganunpleasantstory。\"
\"InthesedaysofFrenchinfluence，\"Ibeganapologetically（notthatIwritesuchstories，oranystories，butLadyMicklehaminvitesanapologeticattitude），andmyeyewanderedtothetable。Isawnothingworse（orbetter）thanthemorningpaperthere。
\"Containedinafriend’sletter，\"shecontinued，focusingthe\"starers\"fullonmyface。
Ididnotknowwhattodo，soIbowedagain。
\"Itmusthavebeenaspainfulforhertowriteasformetoread，\"LadyMicklehamwenton。\"Andthatissayingmuch。Beseated，pray。\"
Ibowed，andsatdowninoneofthestraight—backchairs。Ialsobegan，inmyfright，toplaywithoneofthepiecesofembroidery。
\"IsLadyJane’sworkinyourway？\"（LadyJaneisnamedafterJane，thefamousCountess，Lady—in—WaitingtoCarolineofAnspach。）
Idroppedtheembroidery，andputmyfootonmyhat。
\"Ibelieve，Mr。Carter，thatyouareacquaintedwithMissDorotheaFoster？\"
\"Ihavethatpleasure，\"saidI。
\"Whoisabouttobemarriedtomyson，theEarlofMickleham？\"
\"That，Ibelieve，isso，\"saidI。Iwasbeginningtopullmyselftogether。
\"Myson，Mr。Carter，isofasimpleandtrustingdisposition。
PerhapsIhadbettercometothepoint。Iaminformedbythisletterthat，inconversationwiththewritertheotherday，Archibaldmentioned，quiteincidentally，someverystartlingfacts。Thosefactsconcernyou，Mr。Carter。\"
\"MayIaskthenameofthewriter？\"
\"Idonotthinkthatisnecessary，\"saidshe。\"SheisaladyinwhomIhavetheutmostconfidence。\"
\"Thatis，ofcourse，enough，\"saidI。
\"Itappears，Mr。Carter——andyouwillexcusemeifIspeakplainly——（Isetmyteeth）thatyouhave，inthefirstplace，giventomyson’sbrideaweddingpresent，whichIcanonlydescribeas——\"
\"Apearlornament，\"Iinterposed；\"witharubyortwo，and——\"
\"Apearlheart，\"shecorrected；\"er——fractured，andthatyouexplainedthatthisabsurdarticlerepresentedyourheart。\"
\"Merebadinage，\"saidI。
\"Inexecrablybadtaste，\"saidshe。
Ibowed。
\"Infact，mostoffensive。Butthatisnottheworst。Frommyson’sfurtherstatementsitappearsthatononeoccasion，atleast，hefoundyouandMissFosterengagedinwhatIcanonlycall——\"
Iraisedmyhandinprotest。TheCountesstooknonotice。
\"WhatIcanonlycallromping。\"
\"Romping!\"Icried。
\"Athingnotonlyatrociouslyvulgaratalltimes，butunderthecircumstances——needIsaymore？Mr。Carter，youwereengagedinchasingmyson’sfuturebrideroundatable!\"
\"Pardonme，LadyMickleham。Yourson’sfuturebridewasengagedinchasingmeroundatable。\"
\"Itisthesamething，\"saidLadyMickleham。
\"Ishouldhavethoughttherewasadistinction，\"saidI。
\"Noneatall。\"
Ifellbackonasecondlineofdefense。
\"Ididn’tlethercatchme，LadyMickleham，\"Ipleaded。
LadyMicklehamgrewquitered。Thismademefeelmoreatmyease。
\"No，sir。Ifyouhad——\"
\"Goodnessknows!\"Imurmured，shakingmyhead。
\"Asithappened，however，mysonenteredinthemiddleofthisdisgraceful——\"
\"Itwasatthebeginning，\"saidI，witharegretfulsigh。
Uponthis——andIhavereallyneverbeensopleasedatanythinginallmylife——theCountess，theviolenceofheremotionspenetratingtoherveryfingers，grippedthehandleofher\"starers\"withsuchforcethatshebrokeitintwo!Shewasawomanoftheworld，andinamomentshelookedasifnothinghadhappened。Withmeitwasdifferent；andthatIamnotnowonLadyMickleham’svisitinglistisdueto（interaliaetenormia）
thefactthatIlaughed!ItwasoutbeforeIcouldhelpit。InasecondIwasasgraveasamute。Themischiefwasdone。TheCountessrose。Iimitatedherexample。
\"Youareamused？\"saidshe，andhertonesbanishedthelastofmymirth。Istumbledonmyhatanditrolledtoherfeet。
\"Itisnotprobable，\"sheobserved，\"thatafterMissFoster’smarriageyouwillmeetheroften。Youwillmovein——er——somewhatdifferentcircles。\"
\"Imaycatchaglimpseofherinhercarriagefromthetopofmy’bus，\"saidI。
LadyMicklehamrangthebell。Istoopedformyhat。Totellthetruth，Iwasratherafraidtoexposemyselfinsuchadefenselessattitude，buttheCountesspreservedherselfcontrol。Thebutleropenedthedoor。Ibowed，andlefttheCountessregardingmethroughthemaimed\"starers。\"ThenIfoundthebutlersmiling。Heprobablyknewthesignsoftheweather。Iwouldn’tbeLadyMickleham’sbutlerifyoumademeaduke。
AsIwalkedhomethroughthePark，ImetMissDollyandMickleham。Theystopped。
Iwalkedon。Micklehamseizedmebythecoattails。
\"Doyoumeantocutus？\"hecried。
\"Yes，\"saidI。
\"Why，whatthedeuce？——\"hebegan。
\"I’veseenyourmother，\"saidI。\"Iwish，Mickleham，thatwhenyoudohappentointrudeasyoudidtheotherday，youwouldn’trepeatwhatyousee。\"
\"Lord!\"hecried。\"She’snotheardofthat。IonlytoldAuntCynthia。\"
Isaidsomethingabout\"AuntCynthia。\"
\"Does——doessheknowitall？\"askedMissDolly。
\"Morethanall——muchmore。\"
\"Didn’tyousmoothitover？\"saidMissDollyreproachfully。
\"Onreflection，\"saidI，\"Idon’tknowthatIdid——much。\"（I
hadn’t，youknow。）
SuddenlyMicklehamburstoutlaughing。
\"Whatagame!\"heexclaimed。
\"That’sallverywellforyou，\"saidDolly。\"Butdoyouhappentorememberthatwedinetheretonight？\"Archiegrewgrave。
\"Ihopeyou’llenjoyyourselves，\"saidI。\"Ialwaysclingtothebeliefthatthewickedarepunished。\"AndIlookedatMissDolly。
\"Neveryoumind，littlewoman，\"saidArchie，drawingMissDolly’sarmthroughhis，\"I’llseeyouthrough。Afterall，everybodyknowsthatoldCarter’sanass。\"
Thatpieceofuniversalknowledgemayhelpmatters，butIdonotquiteseehow。Iwalkedon，forMissDollyhadquiteforgottenme，andwaslookingupatArchieMicklehamlike——well，hangit，inthewaytheydo，youknow。SoIjustwalkedon。
IbelieveMissDollyhasgotahusbandwhois（letussay）goodenoughforher。And，foronereasonandanother，Iamgladofit。AndIalsobelievethatsheknowsit。AndIam——I
suppose——gladofthat，too。Oh，yes，ofcourse，Iam。Ofcourse。
THEPERVERSENESSOFIT
\"Itellyouwhat，Mr。Carter，\"saidMissNelliePhaeton，touchingupRhinowithherwhip，\"loveinacottageis——\"
\"Lordforgiveus，cinders，ashes，dust，\"Iquoted。
WewerespankingroundtheParkbehindReadyandRhino。MissPhaeton’shorsesareverylarge；hergroomisverysmall，andhercourageisindomitable。Iamnogreathandatdrivingmyself，andIamnotalwaysquitecomfortable。Moreover，thestricterpartofmyacquaintanceconsider，Ibelieve，thatMissPhaeton’sattentionstomearesomewhatpronounced，andthatIoughtnottodrivewithherinthePark。
\"You’reright，\"shewenton。\"Whatagirlwantsisagoodhouseandlotsofcash，andsomeridin’andalittlehuntin’and——\"
\"Afewg’s!’\"Icriedinshudderingentreaty。\"Ifyouloveme，ag’ortwo。\"
\"Well，Isupposeso，\"saidshe。\"Youcan’tgoridin’withoutgees，canyou？\"
Apparentlyonecouldgodrivingwithoutany，butIdidnotpursuethesubject。
\"It’sonlyinstoriesthatpeopleareinlovewhentheymarry，\"
observedMissPhaetonreflectively。
\"Yes，andthenit’sgenerallywithsomebodyelse，\"saidI。
\"Oh，ifyoucountthat!\"saidshe，hittingReadyratherviciously。Weboundedforward，andIheardthelittlegroombumpingonthebackseat。Iamalwaysgladnottobeagroom——it’sacup—and—ballsortoflife，whichmustbeverywearying。
\"Wereyoueverinlove？\"sheasked，justavoidingabroughamwhichcontainedtheDuchessofDexminster。（If，bytheway，I
havetorunintoanyone，IlikeittobeaDuchess；yougetamuchhandsomerparagraph。）
\"Yes，\"saidI。
\"Often？\"
\"Oh，nottoooften，andIalwaystakegreatcare，youknow。\"
\"Whatof？\"
\"Thatitshallbequiteoutofthequestion，youknow。It’snotatalldifficult。Ionlyhavetoavoidpersonsofmoderatemeans。\"
\"Butaren’tyouapersonof——？\"
\"Exactly。That’swhy。SoIchooseeitherapauper——whenit’simpossible——oranheiress——whenit’spreposterous。See？\"
\"Butdon’tyoueverwanttoget——？\"beganMissPhaeton。
\"Let’stalkaboutsomethingelse，\"saidI。
\"Ibelieveyou’rehumbuggin’me，\"saidMissPhaeton。
\"Iamofferingaveiledapology，\"saidI。
\"Stuff!\"saidshe。\"YouknowyoutoldDollyFosterthatIshouldmakeanexcellentwifeforatrainer。\"
Oh，thesewomen!Amanhadbettertalktoaphonograph。
\"Oranybodyelse，\"saidIpolitely。
MissPhaetonwhippedupherhorses。
\"Lookout!There’sthemountedpoliceman，\"Icried。
\"No，heisn’t。Areyouafraid？\"sheretorted。
\"I’mnotfittodie，\"Ipleaded。
\"Idon’tcareapinforyouropinion，youknow，\"shecontinued（I
hadneversupposedthatshedid）；\"butwhatdidyoumeanbyit？\"
\"Ineversaidit。\"
\"Oh!\"
\"Allright——Ineverdid。\"
\"ThenDollyinventedit？\"
\"Ofcourse，\"saidIsteadily。
\"Onyourhonor？\"
\"Oh，come，MissPhaeton!\"
\"Would——wouldotherpeoplethinkso？\"sheasked，withahighlysurprisingtouchoftimidity。
\"Nobodywould，\"Isaid。\"Onlyasnarlingoldwretchwouldsayso，justbecausehethoughtitsmart。\"
Therewasalongpause。ThenMissPhaetonaskedmeabruptly：
\"Younevermethim，didyou？\"
\"No。\"
Apauseensued。WepassedtheDuchessagain，andscratchedthenoseofherpoodle，whichwaslookingoutofthecarriagewindow。
MissPhaetonflickedRhino，andthegroombehindwentplop—plopontheseat。
\"Helivesintown，youknow，\"remarkedMissPhaeton。
\"Theymostlydo——andwriteaboutthecountry，\"saidI。
\"Whyshouldn’tthey？\"sheaskedfiercely。
\"MydearMissPhaeton，byallmeansletthem，\"saidI。
\"He’sawfullyclever，youknow，\"shecontinued；\"buthewouldn’talwaystalk。Sometimeshejustsatandsaidnothin’，orreadabook。\"
AsuddenintuitiondiscoveredMr。Gay’sfeelingstome。
\"Youweretalkingabouttherun，orsomething，Isuppose？\"
\"Yes，orthebag，youknow。\"
AsshespokeshepulledupReadyandRhino。Thelittlegroomjumpeddownandstoodunder（notat）theirheads。Ileantbackandsurveyedthecrowdsittingandwalking。MissPhaetonflickedaflyoffRhino’sear，putherwhipinthesocket，andleantbackalso。
\"ThenIsupposeyoudidn’tcaremuchabouthim？\"Iasked。
\"Oh，Ilikedhimprettywell，\"sheansweredverycarelessly。
Atthismoment，lookingalongthewalk，Isawamancomingtowardus。Hewasahandsomefellow，withjustatouchof\"softness\"inhisface。Hewasdressedincorrectfashion，savethathishairwasatriflelonger，hiscoatatriflefuller，hishatatriflelarger，histieatriflelooserthantheywerewornbymost。Hecaughtmyattention，andIwentonlookingathimforalittlewhile，tillalightmovementofmycompanion’smademeturnmyhead。
MissPhaetonwassittingboltupright；shefidgetedwiththereins；shetookherwhipoutofthesocketandputitbackagain；
and，tomyamazement，hercheekswereveryred。
Presentlythemancameoppositethecarriage。MissPhaetonbowed。Heliftedhishat，smiled，andmadeasiftopasson。
MissPhaetonheldoutherhand。Icouldseeamomentarygleamofsurpriseinhiseyes，asthoughhethoughthercordialitymorethanhemighthavelookedfor——possiblyevenmorethanhecaredabout。Buthestoppedandshookhands。
\"Howareyou，Mr。Gay？\"shesaid，notintroducingme。
\"Stillwithyourinseparables!\"hesaidgayly，withawaveofhishandtowardsthehorses。\"Ihope，MissPhaeton，thatinthenextworldyourfaithfulsteedswillbeallowedtobearyoucompany，orwhatwillyoudo？\"
\"O，youthinkIcarefornothin’buthorses？\"saidshepetulantly，butsheleanttowardshim，andgavemehershoulder。
\"O，no，\"helaughed。\"Dogs，also，and，I’mafraid，onedayitwasferrets，wasn’tit？\"
\"Have——haveyouwrittenanypoetrylately？\"sheasked。
\"Howconscientiousofyoutoinquire!\"heexclaimed，hiseyestwinkling。\"O，yes，ahundredthings。Haveyou——killed——anythinglately？\"
Icouldswearsheflushedagain。Hervoicetrembledassheanswered：
\"No，notlately。\"
IcaughtsightofhisfacebehindherbackandIthoughtIsawatraceofpuzzle——nothingmore。Heheldouthishand。
\"Well，sogladtohaveseenyou，MissPhaeton，\"saidhe，\"butI
mustrunon。Goodbye。\"
\"Goodbye，Mr。Gay，\"saidshe。
And，liftinghishatagain，smilingagaingayly，hewasgone。
ForamomentortwoIsaidnothing。ThenIremarked：
\"Sothat’syourfriendGay，isit？He’snotabad—lookingfellow。\"
\"Yes，that’shim，\"saidshe，and，asshespoke，shesankbackinherseatforamoment。Ididnotlookatherface。Thenshesatupstraightagainandtookthewhip。
\"Wanttostayanylonger？\"sheasked。
\"No，\"saidI。
Thelittlegroomsprangaway，RhinoandReadydashedahead。
\"ShallIdropyouattheclub？\"sheasked。\"I’mgoin’home。\"
\"I’llgetouthere，\"saidI。
Wecametoastandagain，andIgotdown。
\"Goodbye，\"Isaid。
Shenoddedatme，butsaidnothing。Asecondlaterthecarriagewastearingdowntheroad，andthelittlegroomhangingonfordearlife。
Ofcourse，it’sallnonsense。She’snottheleastsuitedtohim；
she’dmakehimmiserable，andthenbemiserableherself。Butitseemsalittleperverse，doesn’tit？Infact，twiceatleastbetweenthecoursesatdinnerIcaughtmyselfbeingsorryforher。Itis，whenyouthinkofit，soremarkablyperverse。
AMATTEROFDUTY
LadyMicklehamisbackfromherhoneymoon。ImeanyoungLadyMickleham——DollyFoster（well，ofcourseIdo。FancytheDowageronahoneymoon!）Shesignifiedthefacttomebyorderingmetocallonheratteatime；shehad，shesaid，somethingwhichshewishedtoconsultmeaboutconfidentially。Iwent。
\"Ididn’tknowyouwereback，\"Iobserved。
\"Oh，we’vebeenbackafortnight，butwewentdowntoTheTowers。
Theywereallthere，Mr。Carter。\"
\"Allwho？\"
\"AllArchie’speople。Thedowagersaidwemustgetreallytoknowoneanotherassoonaspossible。I’mnotsureIlikereallyknowingpeople。Itmeansthattheysaywhatevertheyliketoyou，anddon’tgetupoutofyourfavoritechairwhenyoucomein。\"
\"Iagree，\"saidI，\"thatasoupconofunfamiliarityisnotamiss。\"
\"Ofcourseit’snicetobeoneofthefamily，\"shecontinued。
\"Thecatisthat，\"saidI。\"Iwouldnotgiveafigforit。\"
\"AndtheDowagertaughtmethewaysofthehouse。\"
\"Ah，shetaughtmethewayoutofit。\"
\"Andshowedmehowtobemostdisagreeabletotheservants。\"
\"Itisthefirstlessonofahousekeeper。\"
\"AndtoldmewhatArchieparticularlyliked，andhowbaditwasforhim，poorboy。\"
\"Whatshouldwedowithoutourmothers？Idonot，however，seehowIcanhelpinallthis，LadyMickleham。\"
\"Howfunnythatsounds!\"
\"Aren’tyouaccustomedtoyourdignityyet？\"
\"Imeantfromyou，Mr。Carter。\"
Ismiled。ThatisDolly’sway。AsMissPhaetonsays，shemeansnoharm，anditisadmirablyconducivetothepleasureofatete—a—tete。
\"Itwasn’tthatIwantedtoaskyouabout，\"shecontinued，aftershehadindulgedinapensivesigh（withadutifullybrightsmileandaglanceatArchie’sphotographtofollow。Herbehavioralwaysremindsmeofavariedandwellassortedmenu）。\"Itwasaboutsomethingmuchmoredifficult。Youwon’ttellArchie，willyou？\"
\"Thisbecomesinteresting，\"Iremarked，puttingmyhatdown。
\"Youknow，Mr。Carter，thatbeforeIwasmarried——oh，howlongagoitseems!\"
\"Notatall。\"
\"Don’tinterrupt。ThatbeforeIwasmarriedIhadseveral——thatistosay，several——well，several——\"
\"Startquiteafresh，\"Isuggestedencouragingly。
\"Well，then，severalmenweresillyenoughtothinkthemselves——youknow。\"
\"Noonebetter，\"Iassentedcheerfully。
\"Oh，ifyouwon’tbesensible!——Well，yousee，manyofthemareArchie’sfriendsaswellasmine；and，ofcourse，they’vebeentocall。\"
\"Itisbutgoodmanners，\"saidI。
\"Oneofthemwaitedtobesentfor，though。\"
\"Leavethatfellowout，\"saidI。
\"WhatIwanttoaskyouisthis——andIbelieveyou’renotsilly，really，youknow，exceptwhenyouchoosetobe。\"
\"WalkintheRowanyafternoon，\"saidI，\"andyouwon’tfindtenwisermen。\"
\"It’sthis。OughtItotellArchie？\"
\"Goodgracious!Here’saproblem!\"
\"Ofcourse，\"pursuedLadyMickleham，openingherfan，\"it’sinsomewaysmorecomfortablethatheshouldn’tknow。\"
\"Forhim？\"
\"Yes——andforme。Butthenitdoesn’tseemquitefair。\"
\"Tohim？\"
\"Yes——andtome。Becauseifhecametoknowfromanybodyelse，hemightexaggeratethethings，youknow。\"
\"Impossible!\"
\"Mr。Carter!\"
\"I——er——meanheknowsyoutoowelltodosuchathing。\"
\"Oh，Isee。Thankyou。Yes。Whatdoyouthink？\"
\"WhatdoestheDowagersay？\"
\"Ihaven’tmentionedittotheDowager。\"
\"Butsurely，onsuchapoint，herexperience——\"
\"Shecan’thaveany，\"saidLadyMicklehamdecisively。\"Ibelieveinherhusband，becauseImust。Butnobodyelse!You’renotgivingmeyouropinion。\"
Ireflectedforamoment。
\"Haven’tweleftoutonepointtoview？\"Iventuredtosuggest。
\"I’vethoughtitalloververycarefully，\"saidshe；\"bothasitwouldaffectmeandasitwouldaffectArchie。\"
\"Quiteso。Nowsupposeyouthinkhowitwouldaffectthem？\"
\"Who？\"
\"Why，themen。\"
LadyMicklehamputdownhercupoftea。\"Whataverycuriousidea!\"sheexclaimed。
\"Giveittimetosinkin，\"saidI，helpingmyselftoanotherpieceoftoast。Shesatsilentforafewmoments——presumablytoallowofthepermeationIsuggested。Ifinishedmyteaandleantbackcomfortably。ThenIsaid：
\"Letmetakemyowncase。Shouldn’tIfeelratherawkward——？\"
\"Oh，it’snogoodtakingyourcase，\"sheinterrupted。
\"Whynotmineaswellasanother？\"
\"BecauseItoldhimaboutyoulongago。\"
Iwasnotsurprised。ButIcouldnotpermitLadyMicklehamtolaughatmeintheunconscionablemannerinwhichsheproceededtolaugh。Ispreadoutmyhandsandobservedblandly：
\"Whynotbeguided——astotheothers，Imean——byyourhusband’sexample？\"
\"Archie’sexample？What’sthat？\"
\"Idon’tknow；butyoudo，Isuppose。\"
\"Whatdoyoumean，Mr。Carter？\"sheasked，sittingupright。
\"Well，hasheevertoldyouaboutMaggieAdeane？\"
\"Ineverheardofher。\"
\"OrLillyCourtenay？\"
\"Thatgirl!\"
\"OrAliceLayton？\"
\"Thered—hairedLayton？\"
\"OrFlorenceCunliffe？\"
\"Whowasshe？\"
\"OrMillieTrehearne？\"
\"Shesquints，Mr。Carter。\"
\"Or——\"
\"Stop，stop!Whatdoyoumean？Whatshouldhetellme？\"
\"Oh，Iseehehasn’t。Nor，Isuppose，aboutSylviaFenton，orthatlittleDelancygirl，orhandsomeMiss——whatwashername？\"
\"Holdyourtongue——andtellmewhatyoumean。\"
\"LadyMickleham，\"saidIgravely，\"ifyourhusbandhasnotthoughtfittomentiontheseladies——andotherswhomIcouldname——toyou，howcouldIpresume——？\"
\"DoyoumeantotellmethatArchie——？\"
\"He’donlyknownyouthreeyears，yousee。\"
\"Thenitwasbefore——？\"
\"Someofthemwerebefore，\"saidI。
LadyMicklehamdrewalongbreath。
\"Archiewillbeinsoon，\"saidshe。
Itookmyhat。
\"Itseemstome，\"Iobserved，\"thatwhatissauce——that，Ishouldsay，husbandandwifeoughttostandonanequalfootinginthesematters。Sincehehas——nodoubtforgoodreasons——notmentionedtoyou——\"
\"AliceLaytonwasapositivefright。\"
\"Shecamelast，\"saidI。\"Justbeforeyou，youknow。However，asIwassaying——\"
\"AndthathorribleSylviaFenton——\"
\"Oh，hecouldn’thaveknownyoulongthen。AsIwassaying，I
should，ifIwereyou，treathimashehastreatedyou。Inmycaseitseemstobetoolate。\"
\"I’msorryItoldhimthat。\"
\"Oh，praydon’tmind，it’sofnoconsequence。Astotheothers——\"
\"IshouldneverhavethoughtitofArchie!\"
\"Oneneverknows，\"saidI，withanapologeticsmile。\"Idon’tsupposehethinksitofyou。\"
\"Iwon’ttellhimasingleword。Hemayfindoutifhelikes。
Whowasthelastgirlyoumentioned？\"
\"Isitanyusetryingtorememberalltheirnames？\"Iaskedinasoothingtone。\"Nodoubthe’sforgottenthembynow——justasyou’veforgottentheothers。\"
\"AndtheDowagertoldmethathehadneverhadanattachmentbefore。\"
\"Oh，iftheDowagersaidthat!Ofcourse，theDowagerwouldknow!\"
\"Don’tbesosilly，forgoodnesssake!Areyougoing？\"
\"CertainlyIam。ItmightannoyArchietofindmeherewhenhewantstotalktoyou。\"
\"Well，Iwanttotalktohim。\"
\"Ofcourseyouwon’trepeatwhatI’ve——\"
\"Ishallfindoutformyself，\"shesaid。
\"Goodbye。IhopeI’veremovedallyourtroubles？\"
\"O，yes，thankyou。Iknowwhattodonow，Mr。Carter。\"
\"Alwayssendformeifyou’reinanytrouble。Ihavesomeexp——\"
\"Goodbye，Mr。Carter。\"
\"Goodbye，LadyMickleham。AndrememberthatArchie，likeyou——\"
\"Yes，yes；Iknow。Mustyougo？\"
I’mafraidImust。I’veenjoyedourtalkso——\"
\"There’sArchie’sstep。\"
Ilefttheroom。OnthestairsImetArchie。Ishookhandssympathetically。IwassorryforArchie。Butingreatcausestheindividualcannotbeconsidered。Ihaddonemydutytomysex。
MYLASTCHANCE
\"Nowmind，\"saidMrs。HilaryMusgrave，impressively，\"thisisthelasttimeIshalltakeanytroubleaboutyou。She’saverynicegirl，quitepretty，andshe’llhavealotofmoney。Youcanbeverypleasantwhenyoulike——\"
\"Thisunsolicitedtestimonial——\"
\"Whichisn’toften——andifyoudon’tdoitthistimeIwashmyhandsofyou。Why，howoldareyou？\"
\"Hush，Mrs。Hilary，\"
\"Youmustbenearly——\"
\"It’sfalse——false——false!\"
\"Comealong，\"saidMrs。Hilary，andsheaddedoverhershoulder，\"shehasaslightnorth—countryaccent。\"
\"ItmighthavebeenScotch，\"saidI。
\"Sheplaysthepianoagooddeal。\"
\"Itmighthavebeenthefiddle，\"saidI。
\"She’sveryfondofBrowning。\"
\"ItmighthavebeenIbsen，\"saidI。
Mrs。Hilary，seeingthatIwasdeterminedtolookonthebrightside，smiledgraciouslyonmeandintroducedmetotheyounglady。Shewasdecidedlygood—looking，freshandsincereofaspect，withlargeinquiringeyes——eyeswhichIfeltwoulddemandalittletoomuchofmeatbreakfast——butthenalargetea—urnputsthatallright。
\"MissSophiaMilton——Mr。Carter，\"saidMrs。Hilary，andleftus。
Well，wetriedthetheatersfirst；butasshehadonlybeentotheLyceumandIhadonlybeentotheGaioety，wesoongottotheendofthat。ThenwetriedArt：sheaskedmewhatIthoughtofDegas：Ievadedthequestionbycriticizingadrawingofahorseinlastweek’sPunch——whichshehadn’tseen。Uponthisshestartedliterature。Shesaid\"SomeQualmsandaShiver\"wasthebookoftheseason。Iputmymoneyon\"TheQueenoftheQuorn。\"
Deadstopagain!AndIsawMrs。Hilary’seyeuponme；therewaswrathinherface。Somethingmustbedone。Abrilliantideaseizedme。Ihadreadthatfour—fifthsofthecultureofEnglandwereConservative。IalsowasaConservative。Itwasfourtooneon!Istartedpolitics。IcouldhavewhoopedforjoywhenI
elicitedsomethingparticularlyincisiveabouttheignoranceofthemasses。
\"Idohopeyouagreewithme，\"saidMissMilton。\"Themoreonereadsandthinks，themoreoneseeshowfatallyfalseatheoryitisthattheignorantmasses——peoplesuchasIhavedescribed——caneverruleagreatEmpire。\"
\"TheEmpirewantsgentlemen；that’swhatitwants，\"saidI，noddingmyheadandglancingtriumphantlyatMrs。Hilary。
\"Menandwomen，\"saidshe，\"whoareacquaintedwiththebestthathasbeensaidandthoughtonallimportantsubjects。\"
AtthetimeIbelievedthisobservationtobeoriginal，butI
havesincebeentoldthatitwasborrowed。Iwasdelightedwithit。
\"Yes，\"saidI，\"andhavegotastakeinthecountry，youknow，andknowhowtobehaveemselvesintheHouse，don’tyouknow？\"
\"Whatwehavetodo，\"pursuedMissMilton，\"istoguidethevoters。Thesepoorrusticsneedtobeinformed——\"
\"Justso，\"Ibrokein。\"Theyhavetobetold——\"
\"Oftherealnatureofthequestions——\"
\"Andwhichcandidatetosupport。\"
\"Ortheymustinfallibly\"——sheexclaimed。
\"Gettheirmarchingorders，\"Icried，inrapture。ItwasexactlywhatIalwaysdidonmysmallproperty。
\"Oh，Ididn’tquitemeanthat，\"shesaidreproachfully。
\"Oh，well，neitherdidI——quite，\"Irespondedadroitly。Whatwaswrongwiththegirlnow？
\"ButwiththehelpoftheLeague——\"shewenton。
\"Doyoubelong？\"Icried，moredelightedthanever。
\"O，yes，\"saidshe。\"Ithinkit’saduty。Iworkedveryhardatthelastelection。Ispentdaysdistributingpackagesof——\"
ThenImade，I’msorrytosay，afalsestep。Iobserved，interrupting：
\"Butit’sticklishworknow，eh？Sixmonths’’hard’wouldn’tbepleasant，wouldit？\"
\"Whatdoyoumean，Mr。——erCarter？\"sheasked。
Iwasstillblind。IbelieveIwinked，andI’msureIwhispered，\"Tea。\"
MissMiltondrewherselfupverystraight。
\"Idonotbribe，\"shesaid。\"WhatIdistributeispamphlets。\"
NowIsupposethat\"pamphlets\"and\"blanketsdon’treallysoundmuchalike，butIwasagitated。
\"Quiteright，\"saidI。\"Pooroldthings!Theycan’taffordproperfuel。\"
Sherosetoherfeet。
\"Iwasnotjoking，\"shesaidwithhorribleseverity。
\"NeitherwasI，\"Ideclaredinhumbleapology。\"Didn’tyousayblankets？’\"
\"Pamphlets。\"
\"Oh!\"
Therewasalongpause。IglancedatMrs。Hilary。Thingshadnotfallenoutashappilyastheymight，butIdidnotmeantogiveupyet。
\"Iseeyou’reright，\"Isaid，stillhumbly。\"TodescendtosuchmeansasIhadinmymindis——\"
\"Tothrowawayourtrueweapons，\"saidsheearnestly。（Shesatdownagain——goodsign。）
\"Whatwereallyneed——\"Ibegan。
\"Isareformoftheupperclasses，\"saidshe。
\"Letthemgiveanexampleofduty，ofself—denial，offrugality。\"
Iwasnottobecaughtoutagain。
\"JustwhatIalwayssay，\"Iobserved，impressively。
\"Letthemputawaytheirhorseracing，theirbetting，theirluxuriousliving，their——\"
\"You’reright，MissMilton，\"saidI。
\"Letthemsetanexampleofmorality。\"
\"Theyshould，\"Iassented。
MissMiltonsmiled。
\"Ithoughtweagreedreally，\"saidshe。
\"I’msurewedo，\"criedI；andIwinkedwithmy\"off\"eyeatMrs。
HilaryasIsatdownbesideMissMilton。
\"NowIheardofamantheotherday，\"saidshe，\"who’snearly40。
He’sgotanestateinthecountry。Henevergoesthere，exceptforafewdays’shooting。Helivesintown。Hespendstoomuch。
Hepassesanabsolutelyvacantexistenceinaroundofemptygaiety。Hehasbynomeansagoodreputation。Hedanglesabout，wastinghistimeandhismoney。Isthatthesortofexample——？\"
\"He’satraitortohisclass，\"saidIwarmly。
\"Ifyouwanthim，youmustlookonaracecourse，oratatailor’s，orinsomefashionablewoman’sboudoir。Andhisestatelooksafteritself。He’stooselfishtomarry，tooidletowork，toosillytothink。\"
Ibegantobesorryforthisman，inspiteofhispeccadilloes。
\"IwonderifI’vemethim，\"saidI。\"I’moccasionallyintown，whenIcangettimetorunup。What’shisname？\"
\"Idon’tthinkIheard——orI’veforgotten。Buthe’sgottheplacenexttoafriendofmineinthecountry，andshetoldmeallabouthim。She’sexactlytheoppositesortofperson——orshewouldn’tbemyfriend。\"
\"Ishouldthinknot，MissMilton，\"saidIadmiringly。
\"Oh，Ishouldliketomeetthatman，andtellhimwhatIthinkofhim!\"saidshe。\"Suchmenashedomoreharmthanadozenagitators。Socontemptible，too!\"
\"It’srevoltingtothinkof，\"saidI。
\"I’msogladyou——\"beganMissMilton，quiteconfidentially；I
pulledmychairatriflecloser，andcastanapparentlycarelessglancetowardsMrs。Hilary。SuddenlyIheardavoicebehindme。
\"Eh，what？Uponmyhonoritis!Why，Carter，myboy，howareyou？Eh，what？MissMilton，too，Ideclare!Well，now，whatapityAnniedidn’tcome!\"
Idisagreed。IhateAnnie。ButIwasverygladtoseemyfriendandneighbor，RobertDinnerly。He’sasensibleman——hiswife’salittleprig。
\"Oh，Mr。Dinnerly，\"criedMissMilton，\"howfunnythatyoushouldcomejustnow？IwasjusttryingtorememberthenameofamanMrs。Dinnerlytoldmeabout。IwastellingMr。Carterabouthim。
Youknowhim。\"
\"Well，MissMilton，perhapsIdo。Describehim。\"
\"Idon’tbelieveAnnieevertoldmehisname，butshewastalkingabouthimatourhouseyesterday。\"
\"ButIwasn’tthere，MissMilton。\"
\"No，\"saidMissMilton，\"buthe’sgotthenextplacetoyoursinthecountry。\"
Ipositivelyleapedfrommyseat。
\"Why，goodgracious，Carterhimself，youmean？\"criedDinnerly，laughing。\"Well，thatisagoodun——ha—ha—ha!\"
Sheturnedastonyglareonme。
\"DoyoulivenexttoMr。Dinnerlyinthecountry？\"sheasked。
IwouldhavedenieditifDinnerlyhadnotbeenthere。Asitwas，Iblewmynose。
\"Iwonder，\"saidMissMilton，\"whathasbecomeofAuntEmily。\"
\"MissMilton，\"saidI，\"byahappychanceyouhaveenjoyedaluxury。Youhavetoldthemanwhatyouthinkofhim。\"
\"Yes，\"saidshe；\"andIhaveonlytoaddthatheisalsoahypocrite。\"
Pleasant，wasn’tit？YetMrs。Hilarysaysitwasmyfault。
That’sawomanallover!
THELITTLEWRETCH
SeeingthatlittleJohnnyTompkinswassafelyoutofthecountry，underinjunctionstomakeanewmanofhimself，andtokeepthatnewman，whenmade，attheAntipodes，IcouldnotseeanythingindiscreetintouchingonthematterinthecourseofconversationwithMrs。HilaryMusgrave。Inpointoffact，Iwascurioustofindoutwhatsheknew，andsupposingsheknew，whatshethought。SoImentionedlittleJohnnyTompkins。
\"Oh，thelittlewretch!\"criedMrs。Hilary。\"Youknowhecameheretwoorthreetimes？AnybodycanimposeonHilary。\"
\"HappywomanI——Imeanunhappyman，Mrs。Hilary。\"
\"Andhowmuchwasithestole？\"
\"Hardonathousand，\"saidI。\"Foratime，youknow，hewasquiteamanoffashion。\"
\"Oh，Iknow。Hecamehereinhisownhansom，perfectlydressed，and——\"
\"Behavedallright，didn’the？\"
\"Yes。Ofcoursetherewasasomething。\"
\"Oryouwouldn’thavebeendeceived!\"saidI，withasmile。
\"Iwasn’tdeceived，\"saidMrs。Hilary，anadmirableflushappearingonhercheeks。
\"Thatistosay，Hilarywouldn’t。\"
\"Oh，Hilary!Whydidn’thisemployersprosecutehim，Mr。
Carter？\"
\"Inthefirstplace，hehadthatinestimableadvantageinacareerofdishonesty——respectablerelations。\"
\"Well，butstill——\"
\"Hiswidowedmotherwasatrump，youknow。\"
\"Doyoumeanagoodwoman。\"
\"Doubtlessshewas；butImeanagoodcard。However，therewasanotherreason。\"
\"Ican’tseeany，\"declaredMrs。Hilary。
\"I’mgoingtosurpriseyou，\"saidI。\"Hilaryintercededforhim。\"
\"Hilary？\"
\"Youdidn’tknowit？Ithoughtnot。Well，hedid。\"
\"Why，healwayspretendedtowanthimtobeconvicted。\"
\"CunningHilary!\"saidI。
\"Heusedtospeakmoststronglyagainsthim。\"
\"Thatwashisguile，\"saidI。
\"Oh，butwhyintheworld——？\"shebegan；thenshepaused，andwentonagain：\"ItwasnothingtodowithHilary。\"
\"Hilarywentwithmetoseehim，youknow，whiletheyhadhimunderlockandkeyatthefirm’soffices。\"
\"Didhe？Ineverheardthat。\"
\"Andhewasmuchimpressedwithhisbearing。\"
\"Well，Isuppose，Mr。Carter，thatifhewasreallypenitent——\"
\"Neversawamanlesspenitent，\"Iinterrupted。\"Hegloriedinhiscrime；ifIrememberhisexactexpression，itwasthatthejamwasjollywellworththepowder，andiftheylikedtosendhimtochokeetheycouldandbe——andsufferaccordingly，youknow。\"
\"Andafterthat，Hilary——!\"
\"Oh，anybodycanimposeonHilary，youknow。Hilaryonlyaskedwhatthejamwas。\"
\"It’sahorridexpression，butIsupposeitmeantactingthepartofagentleman，didn’tit？\"
\"Notentirely。AccordingtowhathetoldHilary，Johnnywasinlove。\"
\"Oh，andhestoleforsomewretched——？\"
\"Nowdobecareful。Whatdoyouknowaboutthelady？\"
\"Thelady!IcanimagineJohnnyTompkin’s’sideal？\"
\"SocanI，ifyoucometothat。\"
\"Andshemusthaveknownhismoneywasn’thisown。\"
\"Whymustshe？\"Iasked。\"AccordingtowhathetoldHilary，shedidn’t。\"
\"Idon’tbelieveit，\"saidMrs。Hilary，withdecision。
\"Hilarybelievedit!\"
\"Oh，Hilary!\"
\"But，thenHilaryknewthegirl。\"
\"Hilaryknew——!YoumeantosayHilaryknew——？
\"Noonebetter，\"saidIcomposedly。