’Friends，’continuedthePrince，’IamthatGiglio，Iam，infact，Paflagonia。Rise，Smith，andkneelnotinthepublicstreet。Jones，thoutrueheart!Myfaithlessuncle，whenI
wasababy，filchedfrommethatbravecrownmyfatherleftme，bredme，allyoungandcarelessofmyrights，likeuntohaplessHamlet，PrinceofDenmark；andhadIanythoughtsaboutmywrongs，soothedmewithpromisesofnearredress。Ishouldespousehisdaughter，youngAngelica；wetwoindeedshouldreigninPaflagonia。Hiswordswerefalse——falseasAngelica’sheart!——falseasAngelica’shair，colour，frontteeth!ShelookedwithherskeweyesuponyoungBulbo，CrimTartary’sstupidheir，andshepreferredhim。’TwasthenIturnedmyeyesuponBetsinda——Rosalba，asshenowis。AndIsawinhertheblushingsumofallperfection；thepinkofmaidenmodesty；
thenymphthatmyfondhearthadeverwoo’dindreams，’etc。
etc。
（Idon’tgivethisspeech，whichwasveryfine，butverylong；
andthoughSmithandJonesknewnothingaboutthecircumstances，mydearreaderdoes，soIgoon。）
ThePrinceandhisyoungfriendshastenedhometohisapartment，highlyexcitedbytheintelligence，asnodoubtbytheROYALNARRATOR’Sadmirablemannerofrecountingit，andtheyranuptohisroomwherehehadworkedsohardathisbooks。
Onhiswriting—tablewashisbag，grownsolongthatthePrincecouldnothelpremarkingit。Hewenttoit，openedit，andwhatdoyouthinkhefoundinit？
Asplendidlong，gold—handled，red—velvet—scabbarded，cut—and—thrustsword，andonthesheathwasembroidered’ROSALBAFOREVER!’
Hedrewoutthesword，whichflashedandilluminatedthewholeroom，andcalledout’Rosalbaforever!’SmithandJonesfollowinghim，butquiterespectfullythistime，andtakingthetimefromHisRoyalHighness。
Andnowhistrunkopenedwithasuddenpony，andouttherecamethreeostrichfeathersinagoldcrown，surroundingabeautifulshiningsteelhelmet，acuirass，apairofspurs，finallyacompletesuitofarmour。
ThebooksonGiglio’sshelveswereallgone。Wheretherehadbeensomegreatdictionaries，Giglio’sfriendsfoundtwopairsofjack—bootslabelled，’LieutenantSmith，’’——Jones，Esq。，’
whichfittedthemtoanicety。Besides，therewerehelmets，backandbreastplates，swords，etc。，justlikeinMr。G。P。R。
James’snovels；andthateveningthreecavaliersmighthavebeenseenissuingfromthegatesofBosforo，inwhomtheporters，proctors，etc。，neverthoughtofrecognisingtheyoungPrinceandhisfriends。
Theygothorsesataliverystable—keeper’s，andneverdrewbridleuntiltheyreachedthelasttownonthefrontierbeforeyoucometoCrimTartary。Here，astheiranimalsweretired，andthecavaliershungry，theystoppedandrefreshedatanhostel。IcouldmakeachapterofthisifIwerelikesomewriters，butIliketocrammymeasuretightdown，yousee，andgiveyouagreatdealforyourmoney，and，inaword，theyhadsomebreadandcheeseandaleupstairsonthebalconyoftheinn。Astheyweredrinking，drumsandtrumpetssoundednearerandnearer，themarketplacewasfilledwithsoldiers，andHisRoyalHighnesslookingforth，recognisedthePaflagonianbanners，andthePaflagoniannationalairwhichthebandswereplaying。
Thetroopsallmadeforthetavernatonce，andastheycameupGiglioexclaimed，onbeholdingtheirleader，’WhomdoIsee？
Yes!No!Itis，itis!Phoo!No，itcan’tbe!Yes!Itismyfriend，mygallantfaithfulveteran，CaptainHedzoff!Ho!
Hedzoff!KnowestthounotthyPrince，thyGiglio？GoodCorporal，methinksweoncewerefriends。Ha，Sergeant，an’mymemoryservesmeright，wehavehadmanyaboutatsinglestick。’
’I’faith，wehave，amany，goodmyLord，’saystheSergeant。
’Tellme，whatmeansthismightyarmament，’continuedHisRoyalHighnessfromthebalcony，’andwhithermarchmyPaflagonians？’
Hedzoff’sheadfell。’MyLord，’hesaid，’wemarchasthealliesofgreatPadella，CrimTartary’smonarch。’
’CrimTartary’susurper，gallantHedzoff!CrimTartary’sgrimtyrant，honestHedzoff!’saidthePrince，onthebalcony，quitesarcastically。
’Asoldier，Prince，mustneedsobeyhisorders：minearetohelpHisMajestyPadella。Andalso（thoughalackthatIshouldsayit!）toseizewhereverIshouldlightuponhim。’
’Firstcatchyourhare!ha，Hedzoff!’exclaimedHisRoyalHighness。
’——OnthebodyofGIGLIO，whilomePrinceofPaflagonia’Hedzoffwenton，withindescribableemotion。’MyPrince，giveupyourswordwithoutado。Look!wearethirtythousandmentoone!’
’Giveupmysword!Gigliogiveuphissword!’criedthePrince；
andsteppingwellforwardontothebalcony，theroyalyouth，WITHOUTPREPARATION，deliveredaspeechsomagnificent，thatnoreportcandojusticetoit。Itwasallinblankverse（inwhich，fromthistime，heinvariablyspoke，asmorebecominghismajesticstation）。Itlastedforthreedaysandthreenights，duringwhichnotasinglepersonwhoheardhimwastired，orremarkedthedifferencebetweendaylightanddark。
Thesoldiersonlycheeringtremendously，whenoccasionally，onceinninehours，thePrincepausedtosuckanorange，whichJonestookoutofthebag。Heexplained，intermswhichwesayweshallnotattempttoconvey，thewholehistoryoftheprevioustransaction，andhisdeterminationnotonlynottogiveuphissword，buttoassumehisrightfulcrown；andattheendofthisextraordinary，thistrulyGIGANTICeffort，CaptainHedzoffflunguphishelmet，andcried，’Hurray!Hurray!LongliveKingGiglio!’
SuchweretheconsequencesofhavingemployedhistimewellatCollege!
Whentheexcitementhadceased，beerwasorderedoutforthearmy，andtheirSovereignhimselfdidnotdisdainalittle!AndnowitwaswithsomealarmthatCaptainHedzofftoldhimhisdivisionwasonlytheadvancedguardofthePaflagoniancontingent，hasteningtoKingPadella’said；themainforcebeingaday’smarchintherearunderHisRoyalHighnessPrinceBulbo。
’Wewillwaithere，goodfriend，tobeatthePrince，’HisMajestysaid，’andTHENwillmakehisroyalfatherwince。’
XV。WERETURNTOROSALBA
KingPadellamadeverysimilarproposalstoRosalbatothosewhichshehadreceivedfromthevariousprinceswho，aswehaveseen，hadfalleninlovewithher。HisMajestywasawidower，andofferedtomarryhisfaircaptivethatinstant，butshedeclinedhisinvitationinherusualpolitegentlemanner，statingthatPrinceGigliowasherlove，andthatanyotherunionwasoutofthequestion。Havingtriedtearsandsupplicationsinvain，thisviolent—temperedmonarchmenacedherwiththreatsandtortures；butshedeclaredshewouldrathersufferallthesethanacceptthehandofherfather’smurderer，wholeftherfinally，utteringthemostawfulimprecations，andbiddingherpreparefordeathonthefollowingmorning。
AllnightlongtheKingspentinadvisinghowheshouldgetridofthisobdurateyoungcreature。Cuttingoffherheadwasmuchtooeasyadeathforher；hangingwassocommoninHisMajesty’sdominionsthatitnolongeraffordedhimanysport；
finally，hebethoughthimselfofapairoffiercelionswhichhadlatelybeensenttohimaspresents，andhedetermined，withtheseferociousbrutes，tohuntpoorRosalbadown。
AdjoininghiscastlewasanamphitheatrewherethePrinceindulgedinbull—baiting，rat—hunting，andotherferocioussports。Thetwolionswerekeptinacageunderthisplace；
theirroaringmightbeheardoverthewholecity，theinhabitantsofwhich，Iamsorrytosay，throngedinnumberstoseeapooryoungladygobbledupbytwowildbeasts。
TheKingtookhisplaceintheroyalbox，havingtheofficersofhisCourtaroundandtheCountHogginarmobyhisside，uponwhomHisMajestywasobservedtolookveryfiercely；thefactis，royalspieshadtoldthemonarchofHogginarmo’sbehaviour，hisproposalstoRosalba，andhisoffertofightforthecrown。
BlackasthunderlookedKingPadellaatthisproudnoble，astheysatinthefrontseatsofthetheatrewaitingtoseethetragedywhereofpoorRosalbawastobetheheroine。
AtlengththatPrincesswasbroughtoutinhernightgown，withallherbeautifulhairfallingdownherback，andlookingsoprettythateventhebeef—eatersandkeepersofthewildanimalsweptplentifullyatseeingher。Andshewalkedwithherpoorlittlefeet（onlyluckilythearenawascoveredwithsawdust），andwentandleanedupagainstagreatstoneinthecentreoftheamphitheatre，roundwhichtheCourtandthepeoplewereseatedinboxes，withbarsbeforethem，forfearofthegreat，fierce，red—maned，black—throated，long—tailed，roaring，bellowing，rushinglions。Andnowthegateswereopened，andwithawurrawarrurawarartwogreatlean，hungry，roaringlionsrushedoutoftheirden，wheretheyhadbeenkeptforthreeweeksonnothingbutalittletoast—and—water，anddashedstraightuptothestonewherepoorRosalbawaswaiting。
Commendhertoyourpatronsaints，allyoukindpeople，forsheisinadreadfulstate!
Therewasahumandabuzzallthroughthecircus，andthefierceKingPadellaevenfeltalittlecompassion。ButCountHogginarmo，seatedbyHisMajesty，roaredout’Hurray!Nowforit!Soo—soo—soo!’thatnoblemanbeinguncommonlyangrystillatRosalba’srefusalofhim。
ButOstrangeevent!Oremarkablecircumstance!O
extraordinarycoincidence，whichIamsurenoneofyoucouldBY
ANYPOSSIBILITYhavedivined!WhenthelionscametoRosalba，insteadofdevouringherwiththeirgreatteeth，itwaswithkissestheygobbledherup!Theylickedherprettyfeet，theynuzzledtheirnosesinherlap，theymoo’d，theyseemedtosay，’Dear，dearsisterdon’tyourecollectyourbrothersintheforest？’Andsheputherprettywhitearmsroundtheirtawnynecks，andkissedthem。
KingPadellawasimmenselyastonished。TheCountHogginarmowasextremelydisgusted。’Pooh!’theCountcried。’Gammon!’
exclaimedhisLordship。’TheselionsaretamebeastscomefromWombwell’sorAstley’s。Itisashametoputpeopleoffinthisway。Ibelievetheyarelittleboysdressedupindoor—mats。Theyarenolionsatall。’
’Ha!’saidtheKing，’youdaretosay\"gammon\"toyourSovereign，doyou？Theselionsarenolionsatall，aren’tthey？Ho!mybeef—eaters!Ho!mybodyguard!TakethisCountHogginarmoandflinghimintothecircus!Givehimaswordandbuckler，lethimkeephisarmouron，andhisweather—eyeout，andfighttheselions。’
ThehaughtyHogginarmolaiddownhisopera—glass，andlookedscowlingroundattheKingandhisattendants。’Touchmenot，dogs!’hesaid，’orbySt。NicholastheElder，Iwillgoreyou!
YourMajestythinksHogginarmoisafraid？No，notofahundredthousandlions!Followmedownintothecircus，KingPadella，andmatchthyselfagainstoneofyonbrutes。Thoudarestnot。
Letthembothcomeon，then!’Andopeningagratingofthebox，hejumpedlightlydownintothecircus。
WURRAWURRAWURRAWUR—AW—AW—AW!!!
InabouttwominutesTheCountHogginarmowasGOBBLEDUP
bythoselions，bones，boots，andall，andTherewasanEndofhim。
Atthis，theKingsaid，’Servehimright，therebelliousruffian!Andnow，asthoselionswon’teatthatyoungwoman——’
’Letheroff!——letheroff!’criedthecrowd。
’NO!’roaredtheKing。’Letthebeef—eatersgodownandchopherintosmallpieces。Ifthelionsdefendher，letthearchersshootthemtodeath。Thathussyshalldieintortures!’
’A—a—ah!’criedthecrowd。’Shame!shame!’
’Whodarescryoutshame？’criedthefuriouspotentate（solittlecantyrantscommandtheirpassions）。’Flinganyscoundrelwhosaysaworddownamongthelions!’
Iwarrantyoutherewasadeadsilencethen，whichwasbrokenbyaPangarangpangpangkarangpang，andaKnightandaHeraldrodeinatthefurtherendofthecircus：theKnight，infullarmour，withhisvizorup，andbearingaletteronthepointofhislance。
’Ha!’exclaimedtheKing，’bymyfey，’tisElephantandCastle，pursuivantofmybrotherofPaflagonia；andtheKnight，an’mymemoryservesme，isthegallantCaptainHedzoff!WhatnewsfromPaflagonia，gallantHedzoff？ElephantandCastle，beshrewme，thytrumpetingmusthavemadetheethirsty。Whatwillmytrustyheraldliketodrink？’
’BespeakingfirstsafeconductfromyourLordship，’saidCaptainHedzoff，’beforewetakeadrinkofanything，permitustodeliverourKing’smessage。’
’MyLordship，ha!’saidCrimTartary，frowningterrifically。
’ThattitlesoundethstrangeintheanointedearsofacrownedKing。Straightwayspeakoutyourmessage，KnightandHerald!’
ReininguphischargerinamostelegantmannercloseundertheKing’sbalcony，HedzoffturnedtotheHerald，andbadehimbegin。
ElephantandCastle，droppinghistrumpetoverhisshoulder，tookalargesheetofpaperoutofhishat，andbegantoread：——
’OYes!OYes!OYes!Knowallmenbythesepresents，thatwe，Giglio，KingofPaflagonia，GrandDukeofCappadocia，SovereignPrinceofTurkeyandtheSausageIslands，havingassumedourrightfulthroneandtitle，longtimefalselybornebyourusurpingUncle，stylinghimselfKingofPaflagonia——’
’Ha!’growledPadella。
’Herebysummonthefalsetraitor，Padella，callinghimselfKingofCrimTartary——’
TheKing’scursesweredreadful。’Goon，ElephantandCastle!’
saidtheintrepidHedzoff。
’——ToreleasefromcowardlyimprisonmenthisliegeladyandrightfulSovereign，ROSALBA，QueenofCrimTartary，andrestorehertoherroyalthrone：indefaultofwhich，I，Giglio，proclaimthesaidPadellasneak，traitor，humbug，usurper，andcoward。Ichallengehimtomeetme，withfistsorwithpistols，withbattle—axeorsword，withblunderbussorsinglestick，aloneorattheheadofhisarmy，onfootoronhorseback；andwillprovemywordsuponhiswickeduglybody!’
’GodsavetheKing!’saidCaptainHedzoff，executingademivolte，twosemilunes，andthreecaracols。
’Isthatall？’saidPadella，withtheterrificcalmofconcentratedfury。
’That，sir，isallmyroyalmaster’smessage。HereisHisMajesty’sletterinautograph，andhereishisglove，andifanygentlemanofCrimTartarychoosestofindfaultwithHisMajesty’sexpressions，I，TuffskinHedzoff，CaptainoftheGuard，amverymuchathisservice，’andhewavedhislance，andlookedattheassemblyallround。
’AndwhatsaysmygoodbrotherofPaflagonia，mydearson’sfather—in—law，tothisrubbish？’askedtheKing。
’TheKing’sunclehathbeendeprivedofthecrownheunjustlywore，’saidHedzoffgravely。’Heandhisaxminister，Glumboso，arenowinprisonwaitingthesentenceofmyroyalmaster。
AfterthebattleofBombardaro——’
’Ofwhat？’askedthesurprisedPadella。
’OfBombardaro，wheremyliege，hispresentMajesty，wouldhaveperformedprodigiesofvelour，butthatthewholeofhisuncle’sarmycameovertoourside，withtheexceptionofPrinceBulbo。’
’Ah!myboy，myboy，myBulbowasnotraitor!’criedPadella。
’PrinceBulbo，farfromcomingovertous，ranaway，sir；butI
caughthim。ThePrinceisaprisonerinourarmy，andthemostterrifictorturesawaithimifahairofthePrincessRosalba’sheadisinjured。’
’Dothey？’exclaimedthefuriousPadella，whowasnowperfectlyLIVIDwithrage。’Dotheyindeed？SomuchtheworseforBulbo。
I’vetwentysonsaslovelyeachasBulbo。NotonebutisasfittoreignasBulbo。Whip，whack，flog，starve，rack，punish，tortureBulbo——breakallhisbones——roasthimorflayhimalive——pullallhisprettyteethoutonebyone!ButjustlydearasBulboistome，——joyofmyeyes，fondtreasureofmysoul!——Ha，ha，ha，ha!revengeisdearerstill。Ho!
tortures，rack—men，executioners——lightupthefiresandmakethepincershot!getlotsofboilinglead!——BringoutROSALBA!’
XVI。HOWHEDZOFFRODEBACKAGAINTOKINGGIGLIO
CaptainHedzoffrodeawaywhenKingPadellautteredthiscruelcommand，havingdonehisdutyindeliveringthemessagewithwhichhisroyalmasterhadentrustedhim。OfcoursehewasverysorryforRosalba，butwhatcouldhedo？
SohereturnedtoKingGiglio’scamp，andfoundtheyoungmonarchinadisturbedstateofmind，smokingcigarsintheroyaltent。HisMajesty’sagitationwasnotappeasedbythenewsthatwasbroughtbyhisambassador。’Thebrutalruthlessruffianroyalwretch!’Giglioexclaimed。’AsEngland’spoesyhaswellremarked，\"Themanthatlayshishanduponawoman，saveinthewayofkindness，isavillain。\"Ha，Hedzoff!’
’Thatheis，yourMajesty，’saidtheattendant。
’Anddidstthouseeherflungintotheoil？anddidn’tthesoothingoil——theemollientoil，refusetoboil，goodHedzoff——andtospoilthefairestladyevereyesdidlookon？’
’Faith，goodmyliege，Ihadnohearttolookandseeabeauteousladyboilingdown；ItookyourroyalmessagetoPadella，andborehisbacktoyou。ItoldhimyouwouldholdPrinceBulboanswerable。HeonlysaidthathehadtwentysonsasgoodasBulbo，andforthwithhebadetheruthlessexecutionersproceed。’
’Ocruelfather——Ounhappyson!’criedtheKing。’Go，someofyou，andbringPrinceBulbohither。’
Bulbowasbroughtinchains，lookingveryuncomfortable。
Thoughaprisoner，hehadbeentolerablyhappy，perhapsbecausehismindwasatrest，andallthefightingwasover，andhewasplayingatmarbleswithhisguardswhentheKingsentforhim。
’Oh，mypoorBulbo，’saidHisMajesty，withlooksofinfinitecompassion，’hastthouheardthenews？’（foryouseeGigliowantedtobreakthethinggentlytothePrince），’thybrutalfatherhascondemnedRosalba——p—p—p—uthertodeath，P—p—p—princeBulbo!’
’What，killedBetsinda!Boo—hoo—hoo，’criedoutBulbo。
’Betsinda!prettyBetsinda!dearBetsinda!Shewasthedearestlittlegirlintheworld。IloveherbettertwentythousandtimeseventhanAngelica，’andhewentonexpressinghisgriefinsoheartyandunaffectedamannerthattheKingwasquitetouchedbyit，andsaid，shakingBulbo’shand，thathewishedhehadknownBulbosooner。
Bulbo，quiteunconsciously，andmeaningforthebest，offeredtocomeandsitwithHisMajesty，andsmokeacigarwithhim，andconsolehim。TheROYALKINDNESSsuppliedBulbowithacigar；hehadnothadone，hesaid，sincehewastakenprisoner。
AndnowthinkwhatmusthavebeenthefeelingsofthemostMERCIFULOFMONARCHS，whenheinformedhisprisonerthat，inconsequenceofKingPadella’scruelandDASTARDLYBEHAVIOURtoRosalba，PrinceBulbomustinstantlybeexecuted!ThenobleGigliocouldnotrestrainhistears，norcouldtheGrenadiers，northeofficers，norcouldBulbohimself，whenthematterwasexplainedtohim，andhewasbroughttounderstandthatHisMajesty’spromise，ofcourse，wasABOVEEVERYTHING，andBulbomustsubmit。SopoorBulbowasledout，Hedzofftryingtoconsolehim，bypointingoutthatifhehadwonthebattleofBombardaro，hemighthavehangedPrinceGiglio。’Yes!Butthatisnocomforttomenow!’saidpoorBulbo；norindeedwasit，poorfellow!
Hewastoldthebusinesswouldbedonethenextmorningateight，andwastakenbacktohisdungeon，whereeveryattentionwaspaidtohim。Thegaoler’swifesenthimtea，andtheturnkey’sdaughterbeggedhimtowritehisnameinheralbum，whereamanygentlemenhadwrittenitonlikeoccasions!
’Botheryouralbum!’saysBulbo。TheUndertakercameandmeasuredhimforthehandsomestcoffinwhichmoneycouldbuy——eventhisdidn’tconsoleBulbo。TheCookbroughthimdisheswhichheonceusedtolike；buthewouldn’ttouchthem：hesatdownandbeganwritinganadieutoAngelica，astheclockkeptalwaysticking，andthehandsdrawingnearertonextmorning。
TheBarbercameinatnight，andofferedtoshavehimforthenextday。PrinceBulbokickedhimaway，andwentonwritingafewwordstoPrincessAngelica，astheclockkeptalwaysticking，andthehandshoppingnearerandnearertonextmorning。Hegotuponthetopofahatbox，onthetopofachair，onthetopofhisbed，onthetopofhistable，andlookedouttoseewhetherhemightescapeastheclockkeptalwaystickingandthehandsdrawingnearer，andnearer，andnearer。
Butlookingoutofthewindowwasonething，andjumpinganother：andthetownclockstruckseven。Sohegotintobedforalittlesleep，butthegaolercameandwokehim，andsaid，’Gitup，yourRoyalIghness，ifyouplease，it’sTENMINUTESTO
EIGHT!’
SopoorBulbogotup：hehadgonetobedinhisclothes（thelazyboy），andheshookhimself，andsaidhedidn’tmindaboutdressing，orhavinganybreakfast，thankyou；andhesawthesoldierswhohadcomeforhim。’Leadon!’hesaid；andtheyledtheway，deeplyaffected；andtheycameintothecourtyard，andoutintothesquare，andtherewasKingGigliocometotakeleaveofhim，andHisMajestymostkindlyshookhandswithhim，andthe’Takeoffthatmarchedon：——whenhark!
Haw——wurraw——wurraw——aworr!
Aroarofwildbeastswasheard。Andwhoshouldcomeridingintothetown，frighteningawaytheboys，andeventhebeadleandpoliceman，butROSALBA!
Thefactis，thatwhenCaptainHedzoffenteredintothecourtofSnapdragonCastle，andwasdiscoursingwithKingPadella，thelionsmadeadashattheopengate，gobbledupthesixbeef—eatersinajiffy，andawaytheywentwithRosalbaonthebackofoneofthem，andtheycarriedher，turnandturnabout，tilltheycametothecitywherePrinceGiglio’sarmywasencamped。
WhentheKINGheardoftheQUEEN’Sarrival，youmaythinkhowherushedoutofhisbreakfast—roomtohandHerMajestyoffherlion!Thelionsweregrownasfataspigsnow，havinghadHogginarmoandallthosebeefeaters，andweresotame，anybodymightpatthem。
WhileGiglioknelt（mostgracefully）andhelpedthePrincess，Bulbo，forhispart，rushedupandkissedthelion。Heflunghisarmsroundtheforestmonarch；hehuggedhim，andlaughedandcriedforjoy。’Oh，youdarlingoldbeast，oh，howgladI
amtoseeyou，andthedear，dearBets——thatis，Rosalba。’
’What，isityou？poorBulbo!’saidtheQueen。’Oh，howgladI
amtoseeyou，’andshegavehimherhandtokiss。KingGiglioslappedhimmostkindlyontheback，andsaid，’Bulbo，myboy，Iamdelighted，foryoursake，thatHerMajestyhasarrived。’
’SoamI，’saidBulbo；’andYOUKNOWWHY。’CaptainHedzoffherecameup。’Sire，itishalf—pasteight：shallweproceedwiththeexecution？’
’Execution!whatfor？’askedBulbo。
’Anofficeronlyknowshisorders，’repliedCaptainHedzoff，showinghiswarrant，onwhichHisMajestyKingGigliosmilinglysaid，’PrinceBulbowasreprievedthistime，’andmostgraciouslyinvitedhimtobreakfast。
XVII。HOWATREMENDOUSBATTLETOOKPLACE，ANDWHOWONIT
AssoonasKingPadellaheard，whatweknowalready，thathisvictim，thelovelyRosalba，hadescapedhim，HisMajesty’sfuryknewnobounds，andhepitchedtheLordChancellor，LordChamberlain，andeveryofficeroftheCrownwhomhecouldseteyeson，intothecauldronofboilingoilpreparedforthePrincess。Thenheorderedouthiswholearmy，horse，foot，andartillery；andsetforthattheheadofaninnumerablehost，andIshouldthinktwentythousanddrummers，trumpeters，andfifers。
KingGiglio’sadvanceguard，youmaybesure，keptthatmonarchacquaintedwiththeenemy’sdealings，andhewasinnowisedisconcerted。HewasmuchtoopolitetoalarmthePrincess，hislovelyguest，withanyunnecessaryrumoursofbattlesimpending；onthecontrary，hedideverythingtoamuseanddiverther；gaveheramostelegantbreakfast，dinner，lunch，andgotupaballforherthatevening，whenhedancedwithhereverysingledance。
PoorBulbowastakenintofavouragain，andallowedtogoquitefreenow。Hehadnewclothesgivenhim，wascalled’Mygoodcousin’byHisMajesty，andwastreatedwiththegreatestdistinctionbyeverybody。Butitwaseasytoseehewasverymelancholy。Thefactis，thesightofBetsinda，wholookedperfectlylovelyinanelegantnewdress，setpoorBulbofranticinlovewithheragain。AndheneverthoughtaboutAngelica，nowPrincessBulbo，whomhehadleftathome，andwho，asweknow，didnotcaremuchabouthim。
TheKing，dancingthetwenty—fifthpolkawithRosalba，remarkedwithwondertheringshewore；andthenRosalbatoldhimhowshehadgotitfromGruffanuff，whonodoubthadpickeditupwhenAngelicaflungitaway。
’Yes，’saystheFairyBlackstick，whohadcometoseetheyoungpeople，andwhohadverylikelycertainplansregardingthem。
’ThatringIgavetheQueen，Giglio’smother，whowasnot，savingyourpresence，averywisewoman；itisenchanted，andwhoeverwearsitlooksbeautifulintheeyesoftheworld，I
madepoorPrinceBulbo，whenhewaschristened，thepresentofarosewhichmadehimlookhandsomewhilehehadit；buthegaveittoAngelica，whoinstantlylookedbeautifulagain，whilstBulborelapsedintohisnaturalplainness。’
’Rosalbaneedsnoring，Iamsure，’saysGiglio，withalowbow。’Sheisbeautifulenough，inmyeyes，withoutanyenchantedaid。’
’Oh，sir!’saidRosalba。
’Takeofftheringandtry，’saidtheKing，andresolutelydrewtheringoffherfinger。InHISeyesshelookedjustashandsomeasbefore!
TheKingwasthinkingofthrowingtheringaway，asitwassodangerousandmadeallthepeoplesomadaboutRosalba；butbeingaPrinceofgreathumour，andgoodhumourtoo，hecasteyesuponapooryouthwhohappenedtobelookingonverydisconsolately，andsaid——
’Bulbo，mypoorlad!comeandtryonthisring。ThePrincessRosalbamakesitapresenttoyou。’
Themagicpropertiesofthisringwereuncommonlystrong，fornosoonerhadBulboputiton，butloandbehold，heappearedapersonable，agreeableyoungPrinceenough——withafinecomplexion，fairhair，ratherstout，andwithbandylegs；butthesewereencasedinsuchabeautifulpairofyellowmoroccobootsthatnobodyremarkedthem。AndBulbo’sspiritsroseupalmostimmediatelyafterhehadlookedintheglass，andhetalkedtotheirMajestiesinthemostlively，agreeablemanner，anddancedoppositetheQueenwithoneoftheprettiestmaidsofhonour，andafterlookingatHerMajesty，couldnothelpsaying——
’Howveryodd!sheisverypretty，butnotsoEXTRAORDINARILY
handsome。’
’Ohno，bynomeans!’saystheMaidofHonour。
’ButwhatcareI，dearsir，’saystheQueen，whooverheardthem，’ifYOUthinkIamgood—lookingenough？’
HisMajesty’sglanceinreplytothisaffectionatespeechwassuchthatnopaintercoulddrawit。AndtheFairyBlacksticksaid，’Blessyou，mydarlingchildren!Nowyouareunitedandhappy；andnowyouseewhatIsaidfromthefirst，thatalittlemisfortunehasdoneyoubothgood。YOU，Giglio，hadyoubeenbredinprosperity，wouldscarcelyhavelearnedtoreadorwrite——youwouldhavebeenidleandextravagant，andcouldnothavebeenagoodKingasnowyouwillbe。You，Rosalba，wouldhavebeensoflattered，thatyourlittleheadmighthavebeenturnedlikeAngelica’s，whothoughtherselftoogoodforGiglio。’
’AsifanybodycouldbegoodenoughforHIM，’criedRosalba。
’Oh，you，youdarling!’saysGiglio。Andsoshewas；andhewasjustholdingouthisarmsinordertogiveherahugbeforethewholecompany，whenamessengercamerushingin，andsaid，’MyLord，theenemy!’
’Toarms!’criesGiglio。
’Oh，mercy!’saysRosalba，andfaintedofcourse。
Hesnatchedonekissfromherlips，andrushedFORTHTOTHE
FIELDofbattle!
TheFairyhadprovidedKingGigliowithasuitofarmour，whichwasnotonlyembroideredalloverwithjewels，andblindingtoyoureyestolookat，butwaswater—proof，gun—proof，andsword—proof；sothatinthemidstoftheveryhottestbattlesHisMajestyrodeaboutascalmlyasifhehadbeenaBritishGrenadieratAlma。WereIengagedinfightingformycountry，_I_shouldlikesuchasuitofarmourasPrinceGigliowore；
but，youknow，hewasaPrinceofafairytale，andtheyalwayshavethesewonderfulthings。
Besidesthefairyarmour，thePrincehadafairyhorse，whichwouldgallopatanypaceyoupleased；andafairysword，whichwouldlengthenandrunthroughawholeregimentofenemiesatonce。Withsuchaweaponatcommand，Iwonder，formypart，hethoughtoforderinghisarmyout；butforththeyallcame，inmagnificentnewuniforms，HedzoffandthePrince’stwocollegefriendseachcommandingadivision，andHisMajestyprancinginpersonattheheadofthemall。
Ah!ifIhadthepenofaSirArchibaldAlison，mydearfriends，wouldInotnowentertainyouwiththeaccountofamosttremendousshindy？Shouldnotfineblowsbestruck？
dreadfulwoundsbedelivered？arrowsdarkentheair？cannonballscrashthroughthebattalions？cavalrychargeinfantry？
infantrypitchintocavalry？buglesblow；drumsbeat；horsesneigh；fifessing；soldiersroar，swear，hurray；officersshoutout’Forward，mymen!’’Thisway，lads!’’Giveit’em，boys!’
’FightforKingGiglio，andthecauseofright!’’KingPadellaforever!’WouldInotdescribeallthis，Isay，andintheveryfinestlanguagetoo？Butthishumblependoesnotpossesstheskillnecessaryforthedescriptionofcombats。Inaword，theoverthrowofKingPadella’sarmywassocomplete，thatiftheyhadbeenRussiansyoucouldnothavewishedthemtobemoreutterlysmashedandconfounded。
Asforthatusurpingmonarch，havingperformedactsofvelourmuchmoreconsiderablethancouldbeexpectedofaroyalruffianandusurper，whohadsuchabadcause，andwhowassocrueltowomen，——asforKingPadella，Isay，whenhisarmyranaway，theKingranawaytoo，kickinghisfirstgeneral，PrincePunchikoff，fromhissaddle，andgallopingawayonthePrince’shorse，having，indeed，hadtwenty—fiveortwenty—sixofhisownshotunderhim。Hedzoffcomingup，andfindingPunchikoffdown，asyoumayimagine，veryspeedilydisposedofHIM。
MeanwhileKingPadellawasscamperingoffashardashishorsecouldlaylegstoground。Fastashescampered，Ipromiseyousomebodyelsegallopedfaster；andthatindividual，asnodoubtyouareaware，wastheRoyalGiglio，whokeptbawlingout，’Stay，traitor!Turn，miscreant，anddefendthyself!Stand，tyrant，coward，ruffian，royalwretch，tillIcutthyuglyheadfromthyusurpingshoulders!’And，withhisfairysword，whichelongateditselfatwill，HisMajestykeptpokingandproddingPadellaintheback，untilthatwickedmonarchroaredwithanguish。
Whenhewasfairlybroughttobay，PadellaturnedanddealtPrinceGiglioaprodigiouscrackoverthesconcewithhisbattle—axe，amostenormousweapon，whichhadcutdownIdon’tknowhowmanyregimentsinthecourseoftheafternoon。But，Lawblessyou!thoughtheblowfellrightdownonHisMajesty’shelmet，itmadenomoreimpressionthanifPadellahadstruckhimwithapatofbutter：hisbattle—axecrumpledupinPadella’shand，andtheRoyalGigliolaughedforveryscornattheimpotenteffortsofthatatrocioususurper。
AttheillsuccessofhisblowtheCrimTartarmonarchwasjustlyirritated。’If，’sayshetoGiglio，’yourideafairyhorse，andwearfairyarmour，whatonearthistheuseofmyhittingyou？Imayaswellgivemyselfupaprisoneratonce。
YourMajestywon’t，Isuppose，besomeanastostrikeapoorfellowwhocan’tstrikeagain？’
ThejusticeofPadella’sremarkstruckthemagnanimousGiglio。
’Doyouyieldyourselfaprisoner，Padella？’sayshe。
’OfcourseIdo，’saysPadella。
’DoyouacknowledgeRosalbaasyourrightfulQueen，andgiveupthecrownandallyourtreasurestoyourrightfulmistress？’
’IfImust，Imust，’saysPadella，whowasnaturallyverysulky。
BythistimeKingGiglio’saides—de—camphadcomeup，whomHisMajestyorderedtobindtheprisoner。Andtheytiedhishandsbehindhim，andboundhislegstightunderhishorse，havingsethimwithhisfacetothetail；andinthisfashionhewasledbacktoKingGiglio’squarters，andthrustintotheverydungeonwhereyoungBulbohadbeenconfined。
Padella（whowasaverydifferentpersoninthedepthofhisdistress，toPadella，theproudweareroftheCrimTartarcrown），nowmostaffectionatelyandearnestlyaskedtoseehisson——hisdeareldestboy——hisdarlingBulbo；andthatgood—naturedyoungmanneveroncereproachedhishaughtyparentforhisunkindconductthedaybefore，whenhewouldhaveleftBulbotobeshotwithoutanypity，butcametoseehisfather，andspoketohimthroughthegratingofthedoor，beyondwhichhewasnotallowedtogo；andbroughthimsomesandwichesfromthegrandsupperwhichHisMajestywasgivingabovestairs，inhonourofthebrilliantvictorywhichhadjustbeenachieved。
’Icannotstaywithyoulong，sir，’saysBulbo，whowasinhisbestballdress，ashehandedhisfatherintheprog，’IamengagedtodancethenextquadrillewithHerMajestyQueenRosalba，andIhearthefiddlesplayingatthisverymoment。’
SoBulbowentbacktotheball—roomandthewretchedPadellaatehissolitarysupperinsilenceandtears。
AllwasnowjoyinKingGiglio’scircle。Dancing，feasting，fun，illuminations，andjollificationsofallsortsensued。
Thepeoplethroughwhosevillagestheypassedwereorderedtoilluminatetheircottagesatnight，andscatterflowersontheroadsduringtheday。Theywererequested，andIpromiseyoutheydidnotliketorefuse，toservethetroopsliberallywitheatablesandwine；besides，thearmywasenrichedbytheimmensequantityofplunderwhichwasfoundinKingPadella’scamp，andtakenfromhissoldiers；who（aftertheyhadgivenupeverything）wereallowedtofraternisewiththeconquerors；andtheunitedforcesmarchedbackbyeasystagestowardsKingGiglio’scapital，hisroyalbannerandthatofQueenRosalbabeingcarriedinfrontofthetroops。HedzoffwasmadeaDukeandaFieldMarshal。SmithandJoneswerepromotedtobeEarls；
theCrimTartarOrderofthePumpkinandthePaflagoniandecorationoftheCucumberwerefreelydistributedbytheirMajestiestothearmy。QueenRosalbaworethePaflagonianRibbonoftheCucumberacrossherriding—habit，whilstKingGiglioneverappearedwithoutthegrandCordonofthePumpkin。
Howthepeoplecheeredthemastheyrodealongsidebyside!
Theywerepronouncedtobethehandsomestcoupleeverseen：
thatwasamatterofcourse；buttheyreallyWEREveryhandsome，and，hadtheybeenotherwise，wouldhavelookedso，theyweresohappy!TheirMajestieswereneverseparatedduringthewholeday，butbreakfasted，dined，andsuppedtogetheralways，androdesidebyside，interchangingelegantcompliments，andindulginginthemostdelightfulconversation。
Atnight，HerMajesty’sladiesofhonour（whohadallralliedroundherthedayafterKingPadella’sdefeat）cameandconductedhertotheapartmentspreparedforher；whilstKingGiglio，surroundedbyhisgentlemen，withdrewtohisownRoyalquarters。Itwasagreedtheyshouldbemarriedassoonastheyreachedthecapital，andordersweredispatchedtotheArchbishopofBlombodinga，toholdhimselfinreadinesstoperformtheinterestingceremony。DukeHedzoffcarriedthemessage，andgaveinstructionstohavetheRoyalCastlesplendidlyrefurnishedandpaintedafresh。TheDukeseizedGlumboso，theEx—PrimeMinister，andmadehimrefundthatconsiderablesumofmoneywhichtheoldscoundrelhadsecretedoutofthelateKing’streasure。HealsoclappedValorosointoprison（who，bytheway，hadbeendethronedforsomeconsiderableperiodpast），andwhentheEx—Monarchweaklyremonstrated，Hedzoffsaid，’Asoldier，sir，knowsbuthisduty；myordersaretolockyouupalongwiththeEx—KingPadella，whomIhavebroughthitheraprisonerunderguard。’
SothesetwoEx—RoyalpersonagesweresentforayeartotheHouseofCorrection，andthereafterwereobligedtobecomemonksoftheseverestOrderofFlagellants，inwhichstate，byfasting，byvigils，byflogging（whichtheyadministeredtooneanother，humblybutresolutely），nodoubttheyexhibitedarepentancefortheirpastmisdeeds，usurpations，andprivateandpubliccrimes。
AsforGlumboso，thatroguewassenttothegalleys，andneverhadanopportunitytostealanymore。
XVIII。HOWTHEYALLJOURNEYEDBACKTOTHECAPITAL
TheFairyBlackstick，bywhosemeansthisyoungKingandQueenhadcertainlywontheirrespectivecrownsback，wouldcomenotunfrequently，topaythemalittlevisit——astheywereridingintheirtriumphalprogresstowardsGiglio’scapital——changeherwandintoapony，andtravelbytheirMajesties’side，givingthemtheverybestadvice。IamnotsurethatKingGigliodidnotthinktheFairyandheradviceratherabore，fancyingitwashisownvelourandmeritswhichhadputhimonhisthrone，andconqueredPadella：and，infine，Ifearherathergavehimselfairstowardshisbestfriendandpatroness。
Sheexhortedhimtodealjustlybyhissubjects，todrawmildlyonthetaxes，nevertobreakhispromisewhenhehadoncegivenit——andinallrespectstobeagoodKing。
’AgoodKing，mydearFairy!’criesRosalba。’Ofcoursehewill。Breakhispromise!canyoufancymyGigliowouldeverdoanythingsoimproper，sounlikehim？No!never!’AndshelookedfondlytowardsGiglio，whomshethoughtapatternofperfection。
’WhyisFairyBlackstickalwaysadvisingme，andtellingmehowtomanagemygovernment，andwarningmetokeepmyword？DoesshesupposethatIamnotamanofsense，andamanofhonour？’
asksGigliotestily。’Methinkssheratherpresumesuponherposition。’
’Hush!dearGiglio，’saysRosalba。’YouknowBlackstickhasbeenverykindtous，andwemustnotoffendher。’ButtheFairywasnotlisteningtoGiglio’stestyobservations，shehadfallenback，andwastrottingonherponynow，byMasterBulbo’sside，whorodeadonkey，andmadehimselfgenerallybelovedinthearmybyhischeerfulness，kindness，andgood—humourtoeverybody。HewaseagertoseehisdarlingAngelica。Hethoughtthereneverwassuchacharmingbeing。
BlackstickdidnottellhimitwasthepossessionofthemagicrosethatmadeAngelicasolovelyinhiseyes。Shebroughthimtheverybestaccountsofhislittlewife，whosemisfortunesandhumiliationshadindeedverygreatlyimprovedher；and，yousee，shecouldwhiskoffonherwandahundredmilesinaminute，andbebackinnotime，andsocarrypolitemessagesfromBulbotoAngelica，andfromAngelicatoBulbo，andcomfortthatyoungmanuponhisjourney。
WhentheRoyalpartyarrivedatthelaststagebeforeyoureachBlombodinga，whoshouldbeinwaiting，inhercarriagetherewithherladyofhonourbyherside，butthePrincessAngelica!
Sherushedintoherhusband’sarms，scarcelystoppingtomakeapassingcurtseytotheKingandQueen。ShehadnoeyesbutforBulbo，whoappearedperfectlylovelytoheronaccountofthefairyringwhichhewore；whilstsheherself，wearingthemagicroseinherbonnet，seemedentirelybeautifultotheenrapturedBulbo。
AsplendidluncheonwasservedtotheRoyalparty，ofwhichtheArchbishop，theChancellor，DukeHedzoff，CountessGruffanuff，andallourfriendspartook，theFairyBlackstickbeingseatedontheleftofKingGiglio，withBulboandAngelicabesideher。
Youcouldhearthejoy—bellsringinginthecapital，andthegunswhichthecitizenswerefiringoffinhonouroftheirMajesties。
’WhatcanhaveinducedthathideousoldGruffanufftodressherselfupinsuchanabsurdway？Didyouaskhertobeyourbridesmaid，mydear？’saysGigliotoRosalba。’WhatafigureoffunGruffyis!’
GruffywasseatedoppositetheirMajesties，betweentheArchbishopandtheLordChancellor，andafigureoffunshecertainlywas，forshewasdressedinalowwhitesilkdress，withlaceover，awreathofwhiterosesonherwig，asplendidlaceveil，andheryellowoldneckwascoveredwithdiamonds。
SheogledtheKinginsuchamannerthatHisMajestyburstoutlaughing。
’Eleveno’clock!’criesGiglio，asthegreatCathedralbellofBlombodingatolledthathour。’Gentlemenandladies，wemustbestarting。Archbishop，youmustbeatchurch，Ithink，beforetwelve？’
’Wemustbeatchurchbeforetwelve，’sighsoutGruffanuffinalanguishingvoice，hidingheroldfacebehindherfan。
’AndthenIshallbethehappiestmaninmydominions，’criesGiglio，withanelegantbowtotheblushingRosalba。
’Oh，myGiglio!Oh，mydearMajesty!’exclaimsGruffanuff；’andcanitbethatthishappymomentatlengthhasarrived——’
’Ofcourseithasarrived，’saystheKing。
’——andthatIamabouttobecometheenrapturedbrideofmyadoredGiglio!’continuesGruffanuff。’Lendmeasmelling—bottle，somebody。Icertainlyshallfaintwithjoy。’
’YOUmybride？’roarsoutGiglio。
’YOUmarrymyPrince？’criedpoorlittleRosalba。
’Pooh!Nonsense!Thewoman’smad!’exclaimstheKing。Andallthecourtiersexhibitedbytheircountenancesandexpressions，marksofsurprise，orridicule，orincredulity，orwonder。
’Ishouldliketoknowwhoelseisgoingtobemarried，ifIamnot？’shrieksoutGruffanuff。’IshouldliketoknowifKingGiglioisagentleman，andifthereissuchathingasjusticeinPaflagonia？LordChancellor!myLordArchbishop!willyourLordshipssitbyandseeapoor，fond，confiding，tendercreatureputupon？HasnotPrinceGigliopromisedtomarryhisBarbara？IsnotthisGiglio’ssignature？Doesnotthispaperdeclarethatheismine，andonlymine？’AndshehandedtohisGracetheArchbishopthedocumentwhichthePrincesignedthateveningwhensheworethemagicring，andGigliodranksomuchchampagne。AndtheoldArchbishop，takingouthiseyeglasses，read——\"’Thisistogivenotice，thatI，Giglio，onlysonofSavio，KingofPaflagonia，herebypromisetomarrythecharmingBarbaraGriselda，CountessGruffanuff，andwidowofthelateJenkinsGruffanuff，Esq。\"
’H’m，’saystheArchbishop，’thedocumentiscertainlya——adocument。’
’Phoo!’saystheLordChancellor，’thesignatureisnotinHisMajesty’shandwriting。’Indeed，sincehisstudiesatBosforo，Gigliohadmadeanimmenseimprovementincaligraphy。
’Isityourhandwriting，Giglio？’criestheFairyBlackstick，withanawfulseverityofcountenance。
’Y——y——y——es，’poorGigliogaspsout，’Ihadquiteforgottentheconfoundedpaper：shecan’tmeantoholdmebyit。Youoldwretch，whatwillyoutaketoletmeoff？HelptheQueen，someone——HerMajestyhasfainted。’
’Chopherheadoff!’}exclaimtheimpetuous’Smothertheoldwitch!’}Hedzoff，theardentSmith，and’Pitchherintotheriver!’}thefaithfulJones。
ButGruffanuffflungherarmsroundtheArchbishop’sneck，andbellowedout，’Justice，justice，myLordChancellor!’soloudly，thatherpiercingshriekscausedeverybodytopause。
AsforRosalba，shewasborneawaylifelessbyherladies；andyoumayimaginethelookofagonywhichGigliocasttowardsthatlovelybeing，ashishope，hisjoy，hisdarling，hisallinall，wasthusremoved，andinherplacethehorridoldGruffanuffrusheduptohisside，andoncemoreshriekedout，’Justice，justice!’
’Won’tyoutakethatsumofmoneywhichGlumbosohid？’saysGiglio；’twohundredandeighteenthousandmillions，orthereabouts。It’sahandsomesum。’
’Iwillhavethatandyoutoo!’saysGruffanuff。
’Letusthrowthecrownjewelsintothebargain，’gaspsoutGiglio。
’IwillwearthembymyGiglio’sside!’saysGruffanuff。
’Willhalf，three—quarters，five—sixths，nineteen—twentieths，ofmykingdomdo，Countess？’asksthetremblingmonarch。
’WhatwereallEuropetomewithoutYOU，myGiglio？’criesGruff，kissinghishand。
’Iwon’t，Ican’t，Ishan’t，——I’llresignthecrownfirst，’
shoutsGiglio，tearingawayhishand；butGruffclungtoit。
’Ihaveacompetency，mylove，’shesays，’andwiththeeandacottagethyBarbarawillbehappy。’
Gigliowashalfmadwithragebythistime。’Iwillnotmarryher，’sayshe。’Oh，Fairy，Fairy，givemecounsel？’AndashespokehelookedwildlyroundattheseverefaceoftheFairyBlackstick。
\"’WhyisFairyBlackstickalwaysadvisingme，andwarningmetokeepmyword？DoesshesupposethatIamnotamanofhonour？\"’saidtheFairy，quotingGiglio’sownhaughtywords。
Hequailedunderthebrightnessofhereyes；hefeltthattherewasnoescapeforhimfromthatawfulinquisition。
’Well，Archbishop，’saidheinadreadfulvoice，thatmadehisGracestart，’sincethisFairyhasledmetotheheightofhappinessbuttodashmedownintothedepthsofdespair，sinceIamtoloseRosalba，letmeatleastkeepmyhonour。Getup，Countess，andletusbemarried；Icankeepmyword，butIcandieafterwards。’
’Oh，dearGiglio，’criesGruffanuff，skippingup，’Iknew，I
knewIcouldtrustthee——IknewthatmyPrincewasthesoulofhonour。Jumpintoyourcarriages，ladiesandgentlemen，andletusgotochurchatonce；andasfordying，dearGiglio，no，no：——thouwiltforgetthatinsignificantlittlechambermaidofaQueen——thouwiltlivetobeconsoledbythyBarbara!ShewishestobeaQueen，andnotaQueenDowager，mygraciousLord!’AndhanginguponpoorGiglio’sarm，andleeringandgrinninginhisfaceinthemostdisgustingmanner，thisoldwretchtrippedoffinherwhitesatinshoes，andjumpedintotheverycarriagewhichhadbeengotreadytoconveyGiglioandRosalbatochurch。Thecannonsroaredagain，thebellspealedtriple—bobmajors，thepeoplecameoutflingingflowersuponthepathoftheroyalbrideandbridegroom，andGrufflookedoutofthegiltcoachwindowandbowedandgrinnedtothem。Phoo!thehorridoldwretch!
XIX。ANDNOWWECOMETOTHELASTSCENEINTHEPANTOMIME
ThemanyupsanddownsofherlifehadgiventhePrincessRosalbaprodigiousstrengthofmind，andthathighlyprincipledyoungwomanpresentlyrecoveredfromherfainting—fit，outofwhichFairyBlackstick，byapreciousessencewhichtheFairyalwayscarriedinherpocket，awakenedher。Insteadoftearingherhair，crying，andbemoaningherself，andfaintingagain，asmanyyoungwomenwouldhavedone，Rosalbarememberedthatsheowedanexampleoffirmnesstohersubjects；andthoughshelovedGigliomorethanherlife，wasdetermined，asshetoldtheFairy，nottointerferebetweenhimandjustice，ortocausehimtobreakhisroyalword。
’Icannotmarryhim，butIshalllovehimalways，’saysshetoBlackstick；’IwillgoandbepresentathismarriagewiththeCountess，andsignthebook，andwishthemhappywithallmyheart。Iwillsee，whenIgethome，whetherIcannotmakethenewQueensomehandsomepresents。TheCrimTartarycrowndiamondsareuncommonlyfine，andIshallneverhaveanyuseforthem。IwillliveanddieunmarriedlikeQueenElizabeth，and，ofcourse，IshallleavemycrowntoGigliowhenIquitthisworld。Letusgoandseethemmarried，mydearFairy，letmesayonelastfarewelltohim；andthen，ifyouplease，I
willreturntomyowndominions。’
SotheFairykissedRosalbawithpeculiartenderness，andatoncechangedherwandintoaverycomfortablecoach—and—four，withasteadycoachman，andtworespectablefootmenbehind，andtheFairyandRosalbagotintothecoach，whichAngelicaandBulboenteredafterthem。AsforhonestBulbo，hewasblubberinginthemostpatheticmanner，quiteovercomebyRosalba’smisfortune。Shewastouchedbythehonestfellow’ssympathy，promisedtorestoretohimtheconfiscatedestatesofDukePadellahisfather，andcreatedhim，ashesatthereinthecoach，Prince，Highness，andFirstGrandeeoftheCrimTartarEmpire。Thecoachmovedon，and，beingafairycoach，sooncameupwiththebridalprocession。
BeforetheceremonyatchurchitwasthecustominPaflagonia，asitisinothercountries，forthebrideandbridegroomtosigntheContractofMarriage，whichwastobewitnessedbytheChancellor，Minister，LordMayor，andprincipalofficersofstate。Now，astheroyalpalacewasbeingpaintedandfurnishedanew，itwasnotreadyforthereceptionoftheKingandhisbride，whoproposedatfirsttotakeuptheirresidenceatthePrince’spalace，thatonewhichValorosooccupiedwhenAngelicawasborn，andbeforeheusurpedthethrone。
Sothemarriagepartydroveuptothepalace：thedignitariesgotoutoftheircarriagesandstoodaside：poorRosalbasteppedoutofhercoach，supportedbyBulbo，andstoodalmostfaintingupagainsttherailingssoastohavealastlookofherdearGiglio。AsforBlackstick，she，accordingtohercustom，hadflownoutofthecoachwindowinsomeinscrutablemanner，andwasnowstandingatthepalacedoor。
Gigliocameupthestepswithhishorriblebrideonhisarm，lookingaspaleasifhewasgoingtoexecution。HeonlyfrownedattheFairyBlackstick——hewasangrywithher，andthoughtshecametoinsulthismisery。
’Getoutoftheway，pray，’saysGruffanuffhaughtily。’I
wonderwhyyouarealwayspokingyournoseintootherpeople’saffairs？’
’Areyoudeterminedtomakethispooryoungmanunhappy？’saysBlackstick。
’Tomarryhim，yes!Whatbusinessisitofyours？Pray，madam，don’tsay\"you\"toaQueen，’criesGruffanuff。
’Youwon’ttakethemoneyheofferedyou？’
’No。’
’Youwon’tlethimoffhisbargain，thoughyouknowyoucheatedhimwhenyoumadehimsignthepaper？’
’Impudence!Policemen，removethiswoman!’criesGruffanuff。
Andthepolicemenwererushingforward，butwithawaveofherwandtheFairystruckthemalllikesomanystatuesintheirplaces。
’Youwon’ttakeanythinginexchangeforyourbond，Mrs。
Gruffanuff，’criestheFairy，withawfulseverity。’Ispeakforthelasttime。’
’No!’shrieksGruffanuff，stampingwithherfoot。’I’llhavemyhusband，myhusband，myhusband!’
’YOUSHALLHAVEYOURHUSBAND!’theFairyBlackstickcried；andadvancingastep，laidherhanduponthenoseoftheKNOCKER。
Asshetouchedit，thebrassnoseseemedtoelongate，theopenmouthopenedstillwider，andutteredaroarwhichmadeeverybodystart。Theeyesrolledwildly；thearmsandlegsuncurledthemselves，writhedabout，andseemedtolengthenwitheachtwist；theknockerexpandedintoafigureinyellowlivery，sixfeethigh；thescrewsbywhichitwasfixedtothedoorunloosedthemselves，andJENKINSGRUFFANUFFoncemoretrodthethresholdoffwhichhehadbeenliftedmorethantwentyyearsago!
’Master’snotathome，’saysJenkins，justinhisoldvoice；
andMrs。Jenkins，givingadreadfulYOUP，felldowninafit，inwhichnobodymindedher。
Foreverybodywasshouting，’Huzzay!huzzay!’’Hip，hip，hurray!’’LonglivetheKingandQueen!’’Weresuchthingseverseen？’’No，never，never，never!’’TheFairyBlackstickforever!’
Thebellswereringingdoublepeals，thegunsroaringandbangingmostprodigiously。Bulbowasembracingeverybody；theLordChancellorwasflinginguphiswigandshoutinglikeamadman；HedzoffhadgottheArchbishoproundthewaist，andtheyweredancingajigforjoy；andasforGiglio，IleaveyoutoimaginewhatHEwasdoing，andifhekissedRosalbaonce，twice——twentythousandtimes，I’msureIdon’tthinkhewaswrong。
SoGruffanuffopenedthehalldoorwithalowbow，justashehadbeenaccustomedtodo，andtheyallwentinandsignedthebook，andthentheywenttochurchandweremarried，andtheFairyBlacksticksailedawayonhercane，andwasnevermoreheardofinPaflagonia。
andhereendstheFiresidePantomime。