Chapter21
\"Atlastyouhavecome，\"shesaid，throwingherarmsroundmyneck。\"Buthowpaleyouare！\"
Itoldherofthescenewithmyfather。
\"MyGod！Iwasafraidofit，\"shesaid。\"WhenJosephcametotellyouofyourfather\'sarrivalItrembledasifhehadbroughtnewsofsomemisfortune。Mypoorfriend，Iamthecauseofallyourdistress。Youwillbebetteroff，perhaps，ifyouleavemeanddonotquarrelwithyourfatheronmyaccount。Heknowsthatyouaresuretohaveamistress，andheoughttobethankfulthatitisI，sinceIloveyouanddonotwantmoreofyouthanyourpositionallows。Didyoutellhimhowwehadarrangedourfuture？\"
\"Yes；thatiswhatannoyedhimthemost，forhesawhowmuchwereallyloveoneanother。\"
\"Whatarewetodo，then？\"
\"Holdtogether，mygoodMarguerite，andletthestormpassover。\"
\"Willitpass？\"
\"Itwillhaveto。\"
\"Butyourfatherwillnotstopthere。\"
\"Whatdoyousupposehecando？\"
\"HowdoIknow？Everythingthatafathercandotomakehissonobeyhim。Hewillremindyouofmypastlife，andwillperhapsdomethehonourofinventingsomenewstory，sothatyoumaygivemeup。\"
\"YouknowthatIloveyou。\"
\"Yes，butwhatIknow，too，isthat，soonerorlater，youwillhavetoobeyyourfather，andperhapsyouwillendbybelievinghim。\"
\"No，Marguerite。ItisIwhowillmakehimbelieveme。Someofhisfriendshavebeentellinghimtaleswhichhavemadehimangry；butheisgoodandjust，hewillchangehisfirstimpression；andthen，afterall，whatdoesitmattertome？\"
\"Donotsaythat，Armand。Iwouldratheranythingshouldhappenthanthatyoushouldquarrelwithyourfamily；waittillafterto-day，andto-morrowgobacktoParis。Yourfather，too，willhavethoughtitoveronhisside，andperhapsyouwillbothcometoabetterunderstanding。Donotgoagainsthisprinciples，pretendtomakesomeconcessionstowhathewants；seemnottocaresoverymuchaboutme，andhewillletthingsremainastheyare。Hope，myfriend，andbesureofonething，thatwhateverhappens，Margueritewillalwaysbeyours。\"
\"Youswearit？\"
\"DoIneedtoswearit？\"
Howsweetitistoletoneselfbepersuadedbythevoicethatoneloves！MargueriteandIspentthewholedayintalkingoverourprojectsforthefuture，asifwefelttheneedofrealizingthemasquicklyaspossible。Ateverymomentweawaitedsomeevent，butthedaypassedwithoutbringingusanynewtidings。
NextdayIleftatteno\'clock，andreachedthehotelabouttwelve。Myfatherhadgoneout。
Iwenttomyownrooms，hopingthathehadperhapsgonethere。Noonehadcalled。Iwenttothesolicitor\'s。Noonewasthere。I
wentbacktothehotel，andwaitedtillsix。M。Duvaldidnotreturn，andIwentbacktoBougival。
IfoundMargueritenotwaitingforme，asshehadbeenthedaybefore，butsittingbythefire，whichtheweatherstillmadenecessary。ShewassoabsorbedinherthoughtsthatIcameclosetoherchairwithoutherhearingme。WhenIputmylipstoherforeheadshestartedasifthekisshadsuddenlyawakenedher。
\"Youfrightenedme，\"shesaid。\"Andyourfather？\"
\"Ihavenotseenhim。Idonotknowwhatitmeans。Hewasnotathishotel，noranywherewheretherewasachanceofmyfindinghim。\"
\"Well，youmusttryagainto-morrow。\"
\"Iamverymuchinclinedtowaittillhesendsforme。IthinkI
havedoneallthatcanbeexpectedofme。\"
\"No，myfriend，itisnotenough；youmustcallonyourfatheragain，andyoumustcallto-morrow。\"
\"Whyto-morrowratherthananyotherday？\"
\"Because，\"saidMarguerite，anditseemedtomethatsheblushedslightlyatthisquestion，\"becauseitwillshowthatyouarethemorekeenaboutit，andhewillforgiveusthesooner。\"
FortheremainderofthedayMargueritewassadandpreoccupied。
IhadtorepeattwiceovereverythingIsaidtohertoobtainananswer。Sheascribedthispreoccupationtoheranxietyinregardtotheeventswhichhadhappenedduringthelasttwodays。I
spentthenightinreassuringher，andshesentmeawayinthemorningwithaninsistentdisquietudethatIcouldnotexplaintomyself。
Againmyfatherwasabsent，buthehadleftthisletterforme：
\"Ifyoucallagainto-day，waitformetillfour。IfIamnotinbyfour，comeanddinewithmeto-morrow。Imustseeyou。\"
Iwaitedtillthehourhehadnamed，buthedidnotappear。I
returnedtoBougival。
ThenightbeforeIhadfoundMargueritesad；thatnightIfoundherfeverishandagitated。Onseeingme，sheflungherarmsaroundmyneck，butshecriedforalongtimeinmyarms。I
questionedherastothissuddendistress，whichalarmedmebyitsviolence。Shegavemenopositivereason，butputmeoffwiththoseevasionswhichawomanresortstowhenshewillnottellthetruth。
Whenshewasalittlecalmeddown，Itoldhertheresultofmyvisit，andIshowedhermyfather\'sletter，fromwhich，Isaid，wemightaugurwell。Atthesightoftheletterandonhearingmycomment，hertearsbegantoflowsocopiouslythatIfearedanattackofnerves，and，callingNanine，Iputhertobed，wheresheweptwithoutaword，butheldmyhandsandkissedthemeverymoment。
IaskedNanineif，duringmyabsence，hermistresshadreceivedanyletterorvisitwhichcouldaccountforthestateinwhichI
foundher，butNaninerepliedthatnoonehadcalledandnothinghadbeensent。
Something，however，hadoccurredsincethedaybefore，somethingwhichtroubledmethemorebecauseMargueriteconcealeditfromme。
Intheeveningsheseemedalittlecalmer，and，makingmesitatthefootofthebed，shetoldmemanytimeshowmuchshelovedme。Shesmiledatme，butwithaneffort，forinspiteofherselfhereyeswereveiledwithtears。
Iusedeverymeanstomakeherconfesstherealcauseofherdistress，butshepersistedingivingmenothingbutvaguereasons，asIhavetoldyou。Atlastshefellasleepinmyarms，butitwasthesleepwhichtiresratherthanreststhebody。Fromtimetotimesheutteredacry，startedup，and，afterassuringherselfthatIwasbesideher，mademeswearthatIwouldalwaysloveher。
Icouldmakenothingoftheseintermittentparoxysmsofdistress，whichwentontillmorning。ThenMargueritefellintoakindofstupor。Shehadnotsleptfortwonights。
Herrestwasofshortduration，fortowardelevensheawoke，and，seeingthatIwasup，shelookedabouther，crying：
\"Areyougoingalready？\"
\"No，\"saidI，holdingherhands；\"butIwantedtoletyousleepon。Itisstillearly。\"
\"WhattimeareyougoingtoParis？\"
\"Atfour。\"
\"Sosoon？Butyouwillstaywithmetillthen？\"
\"Ofcourse。DoInotalways？\"
\"Iamsoglad！Shallwehavelunch？\"shewentonabsentmindedly。
\"Ifyoulike。\"
\"Andthenyouwillbenicetometilltheverymomentyougo？\"
\"Yes；andIwillcomebackassoonasIcan。\"
\"Youwillcomeback？\"shesaid，lookingatmewithhaggardeyes。
\"Naturally。\"
\"Oh，yes，youwillcomebackto-night。Ishallwaitforyou，asI
alwaysdo，andyouwillloveme，andweshallbehappy，aswehavebeeneversincewehaveknowneachother。\"
Allthesewordsweresaidinsuchastrainedvoice，theyseemedtohidesopersistentandsosorrowfulathought，thatItrembledeverymomentlestMargueriteshouldbecomedelirious。
\"Listen，\"Isaid。\"Youareill。Icannotleaveyoulikethis。I
willwriteandtellmyfathernottoexpectme。\"
\"No，no，\"shecriedhastily，\"don\'tdothat。Yourfatherwillaccusemeofhinderingyouagainfromgoingtoseehimwhenhewantstoseeyou；no，no，youmustgo，youmust！Besides，Iamnotill。Iamquitewell。Ihadabaddreamandamnotyetfullyawake。\"
FromthatmomentMargueritetriedtoseemmorecheerful。Therewerenomoretears。
Whenthehourcameformetogo，Iembracedherandaskedherifshewouldcomewithmeasfarasthetrain；Ihopedthatthewalkwoulddistractherandthattheairwoulddohergood。Iwantedespeciallytobewithheraslongaspossible。
Sheagreed，putonhercloakandtookNaninewithher，soasnottoreturnalone。TwentytimesIwasonthepointofnotgoing。
Butthehopeofaspeedyreturn，andthefearofoffendingmyfatherstillmore，sustainedme，andItookmyplaceinthetrain。
\"Tillthisevening！\"IsaidtoMarguerite，asIlefther。Shedidnotreply。
Oncealreadyshehadnotrepliedtothesamewords，andtheComtedeG。，youwillremember，hadspentthenightwithher；butthattimewassofarawaythatitseemedtohavebeeneffacedfrommymemory，andifIhadanyfear，itwascertainlynotofMargueritebeingunfaithfultome。ReachingParis，IhastenedofftoseePrudence，intendingtoaskhertogoandkeepMargueritecompany，inthehopethathermirthandlivelinesswoulddistracther。I
enteredwithoutbeingannounced，andfoundPrudenceathertoilet。
\"Ah！\"shesaid，anxiously；\"isMargueritewithyou？\"
\"No。\"
\"Howisshe？\"
\"Sheisnotwell。\"
\"Isshenotcoming？\"
\"Didyouexpecther？\"
MadameDuvernoyreddened，andreplied，withacertainconstraint：
\"IonlymeantthatsinceyouareatParis，isshenotcomingtojoinyou？\"
\"No。\"
IlookedatPrudence；shecastdownhereyes，andIreadinherfacethefearofseeingmyvisitprolonged。
\"Ievencametoaskyou，mydearPrudence，ifyouhavenothingtodothisevening，togoandseeMarguerite；youwillbecompanyforher，andyoucanstaythenight。Ineversawherasshewasto-day，andIamafraidsheisgoingtobeill。\"
\"Iamdiningintown，\"repliedPrudence，\"andIcan\'tgoandseeMargueritethisevening。Iwillseehertomorrow。\"
ItookleaveofMme。Duvernoy，whoseemedalmostaspreoccupiedasMarguerite，andwentontomyfather\'s；hisfirstglanceseemedtostudymeattentively。Heheldouthishand。
\"Yourtwovisitshavegivenmepleasure，Armand，\"hesaid；\"theymakemehopethatyouhavethoughtoverthingsonyoursideasI
haveonmine。\"
\"MayIaskyou，father，whatwastheresultofyourreflection？\"
\"Theresult，mydearboy，isthatIhaveexaggeratedtheimportanceofthereportsthathadbeenmadetome，andthatI
havemadeupmymindtobelessseverewithyou。\"
\"Whatareyousaying，father？\"Icriedjoyously。
\"Isay，mydearchild，thateveryyoungmanmusthavehismistress，andthat，fromthefreshinformationIhavehad，I
wouldratherseeyoutheloverofMlle。Gautierthanofanyoneelse。\"
\"Mydearfather，howhappyyoumakeme！\"
Wetalkedinthismannerforsomemoments，andthensatdowntotable。Myfatherwascharmingalldinnertime。
IwasinahurrytogetbacktoBougivaltotellMargueriteaboutthisfortunatechange，andIlookedattheclockeverymoment。
\"Youarewatchingthetime，\"saidmyfather，\"andyouareimpatienttoleaveme。Oyoungpeople，howyoualwayssacrificesinceretodoubtfulaffections！\"
\"Donotsaythat，father；Margueritelovesme，Iamsureofit。\"
Myfatherdidnotanswer；heseemedtosayneitheryesnorno。
HewasveryinsistentthatIshouldspendthewholeeveningwithhimandnotgotillthemorning；butMargueritehadnotbeenwellwhenIlefther。Itoldhimofit，andbeggedhispermissiontogobacktoherearly，promisingtocomeagainonthemorrow。
Theweatherwasfine；hewalkedwithmeasfarasthestation。
NeverhadIbeensohappy。ThefutureappearedasIhadlongdesiredtoseeit。IhadneverlovedmyfatherasIlovedhimatthatmoment。
JustasIwasleavinghim，heoncemorebeggedmetostay。I
refused。
\"Youarereallyverymuchinlovewithher？\"heasked。
\"Madly。\"
\"Go，then，\"andhepassedhishandacrosshisforeheadasiftochaseathought，thenopenedhismouthasiftosaysomething；
butheonlypressedmyhand，andleftmehurriedly，saying：
\"Tillto-morrow，then！\"
Chapter22
Itseemedtomeasifthetraindidnotmove。IreachedBougivalateleven。
Notawindowinthehousewaslightedup，andwhenIrangnooneansweredthebell。Itwasthefirsttimethatsuchathinghadoccurredtome。Atlastthegardenercame。Ientered。Naninemetmewithalight。IwenttoMarguerite\'sroom。
\"Whereismadame？\"
\"GonetoParis，\"repliedNanine。
\"ToParis！\"
\"Yes，sir。\"
\"When？\"
\"Anhourafteryou。\"
\"Sheleftnowordforme？\"
\"Nothing。\"
Nanineleftme。
Perhapsshehadsomesuspicionorother，Ithought，andwenttoParistomakesurethatmyvisittomyfatherwasnotanexcuseforadayoff。PerhapsPrudencewrotetoheraboutsomethingimportant。IsaidtomyselfwhenIwasalone；butIsawPrudence；
shesaidnothingtomakemesupposethatshehadwrittentoMarguerite。
AllatonceIrememberedMme。Duvernoy\'squestion，\"Isn\'tshecomingto-day？\"whenIhadsaidthatMargueritewasill。I
rememberedatthesametimehowembarrassedPrudencehadappearedwhenIlookedatherafterthisremark，whichseemedtoindicateanappointment。Iremembered，too，Marguerite\'stearsalldaylong，whichmyfather\'skindreceptionhadratherputoutofmymind。Fromthismomentalltheincidentsgroupedthemselvesaboutmyfirstsuspicion，andfixeditsofirmlyinmymindthateverythingservedtoconfirmit，evenmyfather\'skindness。
MargueritehadalmostinsistedonmygoingtoParis；shehadpretendedtobecalmerwhenIhadproposedstayingwithher。HadIfallenintosometrap？WasMargueritedeceivingme？Hadshecountedonbeingbackintimeformenottoperceiveherabsence，andhadshebeendetainedbychance？WhyhadshesaidnothingtoNanine，orwhyhadshenotwritten？Whatwasthemeaningofthosetears，thisabsence，thismystery？
ThatiswhatIaskedmyselfinaffright，asIstoodinthevacantroom，gazingattheclock，whichpointedtomidnight，andseemedtosaytomethatitwastoolatetohopeformymistress\'sreturn。Yet，afterallthearrangementswehadjustmade，afterthesacrificesthathadbeenofferedandaccepted，wasitlikelythatshewasdeceivingme？No。Itriedtogetridofmyfirstsupposition。
Probablyshehadfoundapurchaserforherfurniture，andshehadgonetoParistoconcludethebargain。Shedidnotwishtotellmebeforehand，forsheknewthat，thoughIhadconsentedtoit，thesale，sonecessarytoourfuturehappiness，waspainfultome，andshefearedtowoundmyself-respectinspeakingtomeaboutit。Shewouldrathernotseemetillthewholethingwasdone，andthatwasevidentlywhyPrudencewasexpectingherwhensheletoutthesecret。Margueritecouldnotfinishthewholebusinessto-day，andwasstayingthenightwithPrudence，orperhapsshewouldcomeevennow，forshemustknowbowanxiousI
shouldbe，andwouldnotwishtoleavemeinthatcondition。But，ifso，whythosetears？Nodoubt，despiteherloveforme，thepoorgirlcouldnotmakeuphermindtogiveupalltheluxuryinwhichshehadliveduntilnow，andforwhichshehadbeensoenvied，withoutcryingoverit。Iwasquitereadytoforgiveherforsuchregrets。Iwaitedforherimpatiently，thatImightsaytoher，asIcoveredherwithkisses，thatIhadguessedthereasonofhermysteriousabsence。
Nevertheless，thenightwenton，andMargueritedidnotreturn。
Myanxietytighteneditscirclelittlebylittle，andbegantooppressmyheadandheart。Perhapssomethinghadhappenedtoher。
Perhapsshewasinjured，ill，dead。Perhapsamessengerwouldarrivewiththenewsofsomedreadfulaccident。Perhapsthedaylightwouldfindmewiththesameuncertaintyandwiththesamefears。
TheideathatMargueritewasperhapsunfaithfultomeattheverymomentwhenIwaitedforherinterroratherabsencedidnotreturntomymind。Theremustbesomecause，independentofherwill，tokeepherawayfromme，andthemoreIthought，themoreconvincedIwasthatthiscausecouldonlybesomemishaporother。Ovanityofman，comingbacktousineveryform！
Oneo\'clockstruck。IsaidtomyselfthatIwouldwaitanotherhour，butthatattwoo\'clock，ifMargueritehadnotreturned，I
wouldsetoutforParis。MeanwhileIlookedaboutforabook，forIdarednotthink。ManonLescautwasopenonthetable。Itseemedtomethathereandtherethepageswerewetasifwithtears。I
turnedtheleavesoverandthenclosedthebook，forthelettersseemedtomevoidofmeaningthroughtheveilofmydoubts。
Timewentslowly。Theskywascoveredwithclouds。Anautumnrainlashedthewindows。Theemptybedseemedatmomentstoassumetheaspectofatomb。Iwasafraid。
Iopenedthedoor。Ilistened，andheardnothingbutthevoiceofthewindinthetrees。Notavehiclewastobeseenontheroad。
Thehalfhoursoundedsadlyfromthechurchtower。
Ibegantofearlestsomeoneshouldenter。Itseemedtomethatonlyadisastercouldcomeatthathourandunderthatsombresky。
Twoo\'clockstruck。Istillwaitedalittle。Onlythesoundofthebelltroubledthesilencewithitsmonotonousandrhythmicalstroke。
AtlastIlefttheroom，whereeveryobjecthadassumedthatmelancholyaspectwhichtherestlesssolitudeoftheheartgivestoallitssurroundings。
InthenextroomIfoundNaninesleepingoverherwork。Atthesoundofthedoor，sheawokeandaskedifhermistresshadcomein。
\"No；butifshecomesin，tellherthatIwassoanxiousthatI
hadtogotoParis。\"
\"Atthishour？\"
\"Yes。
\"Buthow？Youwon\'tfindacarriage。\"
\"Iwillwalk。\"
\"Butitisraining。\"
\"Nomatter。\"
\"Butmadamewillbecomingback，orifshedoesn\'tcomeitwillbetimeenoughinthemorningtogoandseewhathaskepther。
Youwillbemurderedontheway。\"
\"Thereisnodanger，mydearNanine；Iwillseeyouto-morrow。\"
Thegoodgirlwentandgotmeacloak，putitovermyshoulders，andofferedtowakeupMme。Arnouldtoseeifavehiclecouldbeobtained；butIwouldhearofnothing，convincedasIwasthatI
shouldlose，inaperhapsfruitlessinquiry，moretimethanI
shouldtaketocoverhalftheroad。Besides，Ifelttheneedofairandphysicalfatigueinordertocooldowntheover-
excitementwhichpossessedme。
ItookthekeyoftheflatintheRued\'Antin，andaftersayinggood-byetoNanine，whocamewithmeasfarasthegate，Isetout。
AtfirstIbegantorun，buttheearthwasmuddywithrain，andI
fatiguedmyselfdoubly。AttheendofhalfanhourIwasobligedtostop，andIwasdrenchedwithsweat。Irecoveredmybreathandwenton。ThenightwassodarkthatateverystepIfearedtodashmyselfagainstoneofthetreesontheroadside，whichroseupsharplybeforemelikegreatphantomsrushinguponme。
Iovertookoneortwowagons，whichIsoonleftbehind。A
carriagewasgoingatfullgalloptowardBougival。AsitpassedmethehopecametomethatMargueritewasinit。Istoppedandcriedout，\"Marguerite！Marguerite！\"Butnooneansweredandthecarriagecontinueditscourse。Iwatcheditfadeawayinthedistance，andthenstartedonmywayagain。ItooktwohourstoreachtheBarrieredel\'Etoile。ThesightofParisrestoredmystrength，andIranthewholelengthofthealleyIhadsooftenwalked。
Thatnightnoonewaspassing；itwaslikegoingthroughthemidstofadeadcity。Thedawnbegantobreak。WhenIreachedtheRued\'Antinthegreatcitystirredalittlebeforequiteawakening。Fiveo\'clockstruckatthechurchofSaintRochatthemomentwhenIenteredMarguerite\'shouse。Icalledoutmynametotheporter，whohadhadfrommeenoughtwenty-francpiecestoknowthatIhadtherighttocallonMlle。Gautieratfiveinthemorning。Ipassedwithoutdifficulty。ImighthaveaskedifMargueritewasathome，buthemighthavesaid\"No，\"andI
preferredtoremainindoubttwominuteslonger，for，aslongasIdoubted，therewasstillhope。
Ilistenedatthedoor，tryingtodiscoverasound，amovement。
Nothing。Thesilenceofthecountryseemedtobecontinuedhere。
Iopenedthedoorandentered。Allthecurtainswerehermeticallyclosed。Idrewthoseofthedining-roomandwenttowardthebed-roomandpushedopenthedoor。Isprangatthecurtaincordanddrewitviolently。Thecurtainopened，afaintlightmadeitswayin。Irushedtothebed。Itwasempty。
Iopenedthedoorsoneafteranother。Ivisitedeveryroom。Noone。Itwasenoughtodriveonemad。
Iwentintothedressing-room，openedthewindow，andcalledPrudenceseveraltimes。Mme。Duvernoy\'swindowremainedclosed。
IwentdownstairstotheporterandaskedhimifMlle。Gautierhadcomehomeduringtheday。
\"Yes，\"answeredtheman；\"withMme。Duvernoy。\"
\"Sheleftnowordforme？\"
\"No。\"
\"Doyouknowwhattheydidafterward？\"
\"Theywentawayinacarriage。\"
\"Whatsortofacarriage？\"
\"Aprivatecarriage。\"
Whatcoulditallmean？
Irangatthenextdoor。
\"Whereareyougoing，sir？\"askedtheporter，whenhehadopenedtome。
\"ToMme。Duvernoy\'s。\"
\"Shehasnotcomeback。\"
\"Youaresure？\"
\"Yes，sir；here\'salettereven，whichwasbroughtforherlastnightandwhichIhavenotyetgivenher。\"
AndtheportershowedmealetterwhichIglancedatmechanically。IrecognisedMarguerite\'swriting。Itooktheletter。Itwasaddressed，\"ToMme。Duvernoy，toforwardtoM。
Duval。\"
\"Thisletterisforme，\"Isaidtotheporter，asIshowedhimtheaddress。
\"YouareM。Duval？\"hereplied。
\"Yes。
\"Ah！Iremember。YouoftencametoseeMme。Duvernoy。\"
WhenIwasinthestreetIbrokethesealoftheletter。Ifathunder-bolthadfallenatmyfeetIshouldhavebeenlessstartledthanIwasbywhatIread。
\"Bythetimeyoureadthisletter，Armand，Ishallbethemistressofanotherman。Allisoverbetweenus。
\"Gobacktoyourfather，myfriend，andtoyoursister，andthere，bythesideofapureyounggirl，ignorantofallourmiseries，youwillsoonforgetwhatyouwouldhavesufferedthroughthatlostcreaturewhoiscalledMargueriteGautier，whomyouhavelovedforaninstant，andwhoowestoyoutheonlyhappymomentsofalifewhich，shehopes，willnotbeverylongnow。\"
WhenIhadreadthelastword，IthoughtIshouldhavegonemad。
ForamomentIwasreallyafraidoffallinginthestreet。A
cloudpassedbeforemyeyesandmybloodbeatinmytemples。AtlastIcametomyselfalittle。Ilookedaboutme，andwasastonishedtoseethelifeofotherscontinuewithoutpausingatmydistress。
Iwasnotstrongenoughtoenduretheblowalone。ThenI
rememberedthatmyfatherwasinthesamecity，thatImightbewithhimintenminutes，andthat，whatevermightbethecauseofmysorrow，hewouldshareit。
Iranlikeamadman，likeathief，totheHoteldeParis；Ifoundthekeyinthedoorofmyfather\'sroom；Ientered。Hewasreading。Heshowedsolittleastonishmentatseeingme，thatitwasasifhewasexpectingme。Iflungmyselfintohisarmswithoutsayingaword。IgavehimMarguerite\'sletter，and，fallingonmykneesbesidehisbed，Iwepthottears。
Chapter23
Whenthecurrentoflifehadresumeditscourse，IcouldnotbelievethatthedaywhichIsawdawningwouldnotbelikethosewhichhadprecededit。ThereweremomentswhenIfanciedthatsomecircumstance，whichIcouldnotrecollect，hadobligedmetospendthenightawayfromMarguerite，butthat，ifIreturnedtoBougival，IshouldfindheragainasanxiousasIhadbeen，andthatshewouldaskmewhathaddetainedmeawayfromhersolong。
Whenone\'sexistencehascontractedahabit，suchasthatofthislove，itseemsimpossiblethatthehabitshouldbebrokenwithoutatthesametimebreakingalltheotherspringsoflife。IwasforcedfromtimetotimetorereadMarguerite\'sletter，inordertoconvincemyselfthatIhadnotbeendreaming。
Mybody，succumbingtothemoralshock，wasincapableofmovement。Anxiety，thenightwalk，andthemorning\'snewshadprostratedme。Myfatherprofitedbythistotalprostrationofallmyfacultiestodemandofmeaformalpromisetoaccompanyhim。Ipromisedallthatheasked，forIwasincapableofsustainingadiscussion，andIneededsomeaffectiontohelpmetolive，afterwhathadhappened。Iwastoothankfulthatmyfatherwaswillingtoconsolemeundersuchacalamity。
AllthatIrememberisthatonthatday，aboutfiveo\'clock，hetookmewithhiminapost-chaise。Withoutawordtome，hehadhadmyluggagepackedandputupbehindthechaisewithhisown，andsohecarriedmeoff。IdidnotrealizewhatIwasdoinguntilthetownhaddisappearedandthesolitudeoftheroadrecalledtometheemptinessofmyheart。Thenmytearsagainbegantoflow。
Myfatherhadrealizedthatwords，evenfromhim，woulddonothingtoconsoleme，andheletmeweepwithoutsayingaword，onlysometimespressingmyhand，asiftoremindmethatIhadafriendatmyside。
AtnightIsleptalittle。IdreamedofMarguerite。
Iwokewithastart，notrecallingwhyIwasinthecarriage。
Thenthetruthcamebackuponme，andIletmyheadsinkonmybreast。Idarednotsayanythingtomyfather。Iwasafraidhewouldsay，\"YouseeIwasrightwhenIdeclaredthatthiswomandidnotloveyou。\"Buthedidnotusehisadvantage，andwereachedC。withouthishavingsaidanythingtomeexcepttospeakofmattersquiteapartfromtheeventwhichhadoccasionedmyleavingParis。
WhenIembracedmysister，IrememberedwhatMargueritehadsaidaboutherinherletter，andIsawatoncehowlittlemysister，goodasshewas，wouldbeabletomakemeforgetmymistress。
Shootinghadbegun，andmyfatherthoughtthatitwouldbeadistractionforme。Hegotupshootingpartieswithfriendsandneighbours。Iwentwithouteitherreluctanceorenthusiasm，withthatsortofapathyintowhichIhadsunksincemydeparture。
WewerebeatingaboutforgameandIwasgivenmypost。Iputdownmyunloadedgunatmyside，andmeditated。Iwatchedthecloudspass。Iletmythoughtwanderoverthesolitaryplains，andfromtimetotimeIheardsomeonecalltomeandpointtoaharenottenpacesoff。Noneofthesedetailsescapedmyfather，andhewasnotdeceivedbymyexteriorcalm。Hewaswellawarethat，brokenasInowwas，Ishouldsomedayexperienceaterriblereaction，whichmightbedangerous，and，withoutseemingtomakeanyefforttoconsoleme，hedidhisutmosttodistractmythoughts。
Mysister，naturally，knewnothingofwhathadhappened，andshecouldnotunderstandhowitwasthatI，whohadformerlybeensolighthearted，hadsuddenlybecomesosadanddreamy。
Sometimes，surprisinginthemidstofmysadnessmyfather\'sanxiousscrutiny，Ipressedhishandasiftoaskhimtacitlytoforgivemeforthepainwhich，inspiteofmyself，Iwasgivinghim。
Thusamonthpassed，butattheendofthattimeIcouldendureitnolonger。ThememoryofMargueritepursuedmeunceasingly。I
hadloved，IstilllovedthiswomansomuchthatIcouldnotsuddenlybecomeindifferenttoher。Ihadtoloveortohateher。
Aboveall，whateverIfeltforher，Ihadtoseeheragain，andatonce。Thisdesirepossessedmymind，andwithalltheviolenceofawillwhichhadbeguntoreassertitselfinabodysolonginert。
ItwasnotenoughformetoseeMargueriteinamonth，aweek。I
hadtoseehertheverynextdayafterthedaywhenthethoughthadoccurredtome；andIwenttomyfatherandtoldhimthatI
hadbeencalledtoParisonbusiness，butthatIshouldreturnpromptly。Nodoubtheguessedthereasonofmydeparture，forheinsistedthatIshouldstay，but，seeingthatifIdidnotcarryoutmyintentiontheconsequences，inthestateinwhichIwas，mightbefatal，heembracedme，andbeggedme，almost，withtears，toreturnwithoutdelay。
IdidnotsleeponthewaytoParis。Oncethere，whatwasIgoingtodo？Ididnotknow；IonlyknewthatitmustbesomethingconnectedwithMarguerite。Iwenttomyroomstochangemyclothes，and，astheweatherwasfineanditwasstillearly，I
mademywaytotheChamps-Elysees。AttheendofhalfanhourI
sawMarguerite\'scarriage，atsomedistance，comingfromtheRond-PointtothePlacedelaConcorde。Shehadrepurchasedherhorses，forthecarriagewasjustasIwasaccustomedtoseeit，butshewasnotinit。ScarcelyhadInoticedthisfact，whenlookingaroundme，IsawMargueriteonfoot，accompaniedbyawomanwhomIhadneverseen。
Asshepassedmesheturnedpale，andanervoussmiletightenedaboutherlips。Formypart，myheartbeatviolentlyinmybreast；butIsucceededingivingacoldexpressiontomyface，asIbowedcoldlytomyformermistress，whojustthenreachedhercarriage，intowhichshegotwithherfriend。
IknewMarguerite：thisunexpectedmeetingmustcertainlyhaveupsether。NodoubtshehadheardthatIhadgoneaway，andhadthusbeenreassuredastotheconsequencesofourrupture；but，seeingmeagaininParis，findingherselffacetofacewithme，paleasIwas，shemusthaverealizedthatIhadnotreturnedwithoutpurpose，andshemusthaveaskedherselfwhatthatpurposewas。
IfIhadseenMargueriteunhappy，if，inrevengingmyselfuponher，Icouldhavecometoheraid，Ishouldperhapshaveforgivenher，andcertainlyIshouldhaveneverdreamtofdoingheraninjury。ButIfoundherapparentlyhappy，someoneelsehadrestoredtohertheluxurywhichIcouldnotgiveher；herbreakingwithmeseemedtoassumeacharacterofthebasestself-interest；Iwasloweredinmyownesteemaswellasinmylove。IresolvedthatsheshouldpayforwhatIhadsuffered。
Icouldnotbeindifferenttowhatshedid，consequentlywhatwouldhurtherthemostwouldbemyindifference；itwas，therefore，thissentimentwhichImustaffect，notonlyinhereyes，butintheeyesofothers。
Itriedtoputonasmilingcountenance，andIwenttocallonPrudence。Themaidannouncedme，andIhadtowaitafewminutesinthedrawing-room。AtlastMme。Duvernoyappearedandaskedmeintoherboudoir；asIseatedmyselfIheardthedrawing-roomdooropen，alightfootstepmadethefloorcreakandthefrontdoorwasclosedviolently。
\"Iamdisturbingyou，\"IsaidtoPrudence。
\"Notintheleast。Margueritewasthere。Whensheheardyouannounced，shemadeherescape；itwasshewhohasjustgoneout。\"
\"Issheafraidofmenow？\"
\"No。butsheisafraidthatyouwouldnotwishtoseeher。\"
\"Butwhy？\"Isaid，drawingmybreathwithdifficulty，forIwaschokedwithemotion。\"Thepoorgirlleftmeforhercarriage，herfurniture，andherdiamonds；shedidquiteright，andIdon\'tbearheranygrudge。Imetherto-day，\"Icontinuedcarelessly。
\"Where？\"askedPrudence，lookingatmeandseemingtoaskherselfifthiswasthesamemanwhomshehadknownsomadlyinlove。
\"IntheChamps-Elysees。Shewaswithanotherwoman，verypretty。
Whoisshe？\"
\"Whatwasshelike？\"
\"Blonde，slender，withsidecurls；blueeyes；veryelegant。\"
\"Ali！ItwasOlympe；sheisreallyverypretty。\"
\"Whomdoesshelivewith？\"
\"Withnobody；withanybody。\"
\"Wheredoesshelive？\"
\"RueTroncliet，No。——。Doyouwanttomakelovetoher？\"
\"Oneneverknows。\"
\"AndMarguerite？\"
\"IshouldhardlytellyouthetruthifIsaidIthinknomoreabouther；butIamoneofthosewithwhomeverythingdependsonthewayinwhichonebreakswiththem。NowMargueriteendedwithmesolightlythatIrealizeIwasagreatfooltohavebeenasmuchinlovewithherasIwas，forIwasreallyverymuchinlovewiththatgirl。\"
YoucanimaginethewayinwhichIsaidthat；thesweatbrokeoutonmyforehead。
\"Shewasveryfondofyou，youknow，andshestillis；theproofis，thataftermeetingyouto-day，shecamestraighttotellmeaboutit。Whenshegothereshewasallofatremble；Ithoughtshewasgoingtofaint。\"
\"Well，whatdidshesay？\"
\"Shesaid，\'Heissuretocomehere，\'andshebeggedmetoaskyoutoforgiveher。\"
\"Ihaveforgivenher，youmaytellher。Shewasagoodgirl；but，afterall，liketheothers，andIoughttohaveexpectedwhathappened。Iamevengratefultoher，forIseenowwhatwouldhavehappenedifIhadlivedwithheraltogether。Itwasridiculous。\"
\"Shewillbeverygladtofindthatyoutakeitsowell。Itwasquitetimesheleftyou，mydearfellow。Therascalofanagenttowhomshehadofferedtosellherfurniturewentaroundtohercreditorstofindouthowmuchsheowed；theytookfright，andintwodaysshewouldhavebeensoldup。\"
\"Andnowitisallpaid？\"
\"Moreorless。\"
\"Andwhohassuppliedthemoney？\"
\"TheComtedeN。Ah，mydearfriend，therearemenmadeonpurposeforsuchoccasions。Tocutalongstoryshorthegavehertwentythousandfrancs，buthehashadhiswayatlast。HeknowsquitewellthatMargueriteisnotinlovewithhim；butheisverynicewithherallthesame。Asyouhaveseen，hehasrepurchasedherhorses，hehastakenherjewelsoutofpawn，andhegivesherasmuchmoneyasthedukeusedtogiveher；ifshelikestolivequietly，hewillstaywithheralongtime。\"
\"Andwhatisshedoing？IsshelivinginParisaltogether？\"
\"ShewouldnevergobacktoBougivalafteryouwent。Ihadtogomyselfandseeafterallherthings，andyours，too。Imadeapackageofthemandyoucansendhereforthem。Youwillfindeverything，exceptalittlecasewithyourinitials。Margueritewantedtokeepit。Ifyoureallywantit，Iwillaskherforit。\"
\"Letherkeepit，\"Istammered，forIfeltthetearsrisefrommyhearttomyeyesattherecollectionofthevillagewhereIhadbeensohappy，andatthethoughtthatMargueritecaredtokeepsomethingwhichhadbelongedtomeandwouldrecallmetoher。Ifshehadenteredatthatmomentmythoughtsofvengeancewouldhavedisappeared，andIshouldhavefallenatherfeet。
\"Fortherest，\"continuedPrudence，\"Ineversawherassheisnow；shehardlytakesanysleep，shegoestoalltheballs，shegoestosuppers，sheevendrinks。Theotherday，afterasupper，shehadtostayinbedforaweek；andwhenthedoctorlethergetup，shebeganagainattheriskofherlife。Shallyougoandseeher？\"
\"Whatisthegood？Icametoseeyou，becauseyouhavealwaysbeencharmingtome，andIknewyoubeforeIeverknewMarguerite。IoweittoyouthatIhavebeenherlover，andalso，don\'tI，thatIamherlovernolonger？\"
\"Well，IdidallIcouldtogetherawayfromyou，andIbelieveyouwillbethankfultomelateron。\"
Ioweyouadoublegratitude，\"Iadded，rising，forIwasdisgustedwiththewoman，seeinghertakeeverywordIsaidtoherasifitwereserious。
\"Youaregoing？\"
\"Yes。\"
Ihadlearnedenough。
\"WhenshallIbeseeingyou？\"
\"Soon。Good-bye。\"
\"Good-bye。\"
Prudencesawmetothedoor，andIwentbacktomyownroomswithtearsofrageinmyeyesandadesireforvengeanceinmyheart。
SoMargueritewasnodifferentfromtheothers；sothesteadfastlovethatshehadhadformecouldnotresistthedesireofreturningtoherformerlife，andtheneedofhavingacarriageandplungingintodissipation。SoIsaidtomyself，asIlayawakeatnightthoughifIhadreflectedascalmlyasIprofessedtoIshouldhaveseeninthisnewandturbulentlifeofMargueritetheattempttosilenceaconstantthought，aceaselessmemory。Unfortunately，evilpassionhadtheupperhand，andI
onlysoughtforsomemeansofavengingmyselfonthepoorcreature。Oh，howpettyandvileismanwhenheiswoundedinoneofhisnarrowpassions！
ThisOlympewhomIhadseenwas，ifnotafriendofMarguerite，atalleventsthewomanwithwhomshewasmostoftenseensinceherreturntoParis。Shewasgoingtogiveaball，and，asItookitforgrantedthatMargueritewouldbethere，Itriedtogetaninvitationandsucceeded。
When，fullofmysorrowfulemotions，Iarrivedattheball，itwasalreadyveryanimated。Theyweredancing，shoutingeven，andinoneofthequadrillesIperceivedMargueritedancingwiththeComtedeN。，whoseemedproudofshowingheroff，asifhesaidtoeverybody：\"Thiswomanismine。\"
Ileanedagainstthemantel-piecejustoppositeMargueriteandwatchedherdancing。Herfacechangedthemomentshecaughtsightofme。Isalutedhercasuallywithaglanceoftheeyesandawaveofthehand。
WhenIreflectedthataftertheballshewouldgohome，notwithmebutwiththatrichfool，whenIthoughtofwhatwouldfollowtheirreturn，thebloodrosetomyface，andIfelttheneedofdoingsomethingtotroubletheirrelations。
AfterthecontredanseIwentuptothemistressofthehouse，whodisplayedforthebenefitofherguestsadazzlingbosomandmagnificentshoulders。Shewasbeautiful，and，fromthepointofviewoffigure，morebeautifulthanMarguerite。IrealizedthisfactstillmoreclearlyfromcertainglanceswhichMargueritebestoweduponherwhileIwastalkingwithher。ThemanwhowastheloverofsuchawomanmightwellbeasproudasM。deN。，andshewasbeautifulenoughtoinspireapassionnotlessgreatthanthatwhichMargueritehadinspiredinme。Atthatmomentshehadnolover。Itwouldnotbedifficulttobecomeso；itdependedonlyonshowingenoughmoneytoattractherattention。
Imadeupmymind。Thatwomanshouldbemymistress。Ibeganbydancingwithher。Halfanhourafterward，Marguerite，paleasdeath，putonherpelisseandlefttheball。
Chapter24
Itwassomethingalready，butitwasnotenough。IsawtheholdwhichIhaduponthiswoman，andItookacowardlyadvantageofit。
WhenIthinkthatsheisdeadnow，IaskmyselfifGodwilleverforgivemeforthewrongIdidher。
Afterthesupper，whichwasnoisyascouldbe，therewasgambling。IsatbythesideofOlympeandputdownmymoneysorecklesslythatshecouldnotbutnoticeme。InaninstantIhadgainedonehundredandfiftyortwohundredlouis，whichIspreadoutbeforemeonthetable，andonwhichshefastenedhereyesgreedily。
Iwastheonlyonenotcompletelyabsorbedbythegame，andabletopayhersomeattention。AlltherestofthenightIgained，anditwasIwhogavehermoneytoplay，forshehadlostallshehadbeforeherandprobablyallshehadinthehouse。
Atfiveinthemorning，theguestsdeparted。Ihadgainedthreehundredlouis。
Alltheplayerswerealreadyontheirwaydownstairs；Iwastheonlyonewhohadremainedbehind，andasIdidnotknowanyofthem，noonenoticedit。Olympeherselfwaslightingtheway，andIwasgoingtofollowtheothers，when，turningback，Isaidtoher：
\"Imustspeaktoyou。\"
\"To-morrow，\"shesaid。
\"No，now。\"
\"Whathaveyoutosay？\"
\"Youwillsee。\"
AndIwentbackintotheroom。
\"Youhavelost，\"Isaid。
\"Yes。
\"Allthatyouhadinthehouse？\"
Shehesitated。
\"Befrank。\"
\"Well，itistrue。\"
\"Ihavewonthreehundredlouis。Heretheyare，ifyouwillletmestayhereto-night。\"
AndIthrewthegoldonthetable。