Itwasrough,——mightyrough;
Buttheboystheystoodby,AndtheybroughthimthestuffForahouse,onthesly;
Andtheoldwoman,——well,shedidwashing,andtookonwhennoonewasnigh。
Butthis’yerluckofDow’sWassopowerfulmeanThatthespringnearhishouseDriedrightuponthegreen;
Andhesunkfortyfeetdownforwater,butnaryadroptobeseen。
Thenthebarpeteredout,Andtheboyswouldn’tstay;
Andthechillsgotabout,Andhiswifefellaway;
ButDowinhiswellkeptapeggin’inhisusualridikilousway。
Oneday,——itwasJune,Andayearago,jest——
ThisDowkematnoonTohisworkliketherest,Withashovelandpickonhisshoulder,andderringerhidinhisbreast。
Hegoestothewell,Andhestandsonthebrink,AndstopsforaspellJesttolistenandthink:
Forthesuninhiseyes(jestlikethis,sir!),yousee,kindermadethecussblink。
HistworaggedgalsInthegulchwereatplay,AndagowndthatwasSal’sKinderflappedonabay:
Notmuchforamantobeleavin’,buthisall,——asI’veheer’dthefolkssay。
And——That’sapearthossThetyou’vegot,——ain’titnow?
Whatmightbehercost?
Eh?Oh!——Well,then,Dow——
Let’ssee,——well,thatforty-footgravewasn’this,sir,thatday,anyhow。
ForablowofhispickSortercavedintheside,Andhelookedandturnedsick,Thenhetrembledandcried。
Foryouseethederncusshadstruck——\"Water?\"——Begyourparding,youngman,——thereyoulied!
ItwasGOLD,——inthequartz,Anditranallalike;
AndIreckonfiveoughtsWastheworthofthatstrike;
Andthathousewiththecoopilow’shis’n,——whichthesameisn’tbadforaPike。
Thet’swhyit’sDow’sFlat;
AndthethingofitisThathekindergotthatThroughsheercontrairiness:
For’twasWATERthedernedcusswasseekin’,andhisluckmadehimcertaintomiss。
Thet’sso!Thar’syourway,Totheleftofyontree;
But——a——lookh’yur,say?
Won’tyoucomeuptotea?
No?Well,thenthenexttimeyou’repassin’;andaskafterDow,——
andthet’sME。
INTHETUNNEL
Didn’tknowFlynn,——
FlynnofVirginia,——
Longashe’sbeen’yar?
Look’eehere,stranger,WharHEVyoubeen?
HereinthistunnelHewasmypardner,ThatsameTomFlynn,——
Workingtogether,Inwindandweather,Dayoutandin。
Didn’tknowFlynn!
Well,thatISqueer;
Why,it’sasinTothinkofTomFlynn,——
Tomwithhischeer,Tomwithoutfear,——
Stranger,look’yar!
Tharinthedrift,Backtothewall,HeheldthetimbersReadytofall;
TheninthedarknessIheardhimcall:
\"Runforyourlife,Jake!
Runforyourwife’ssake!
Don’twaitforme。\"
AndthatwasallHeardinthedin,HeardofTomFlynn,——
FlynnofVirginia。
That’sallaboutFlynnofVirginia。
Thatletsmeout。
Hereinthedamp,——
Outofthesun,——
That’ardernedlampMakesmyeyesrun。
Well,there,——I’mdone!
But,sir,whenyou’llHearthenextfoolAskingofFlynn,——
FlynnofVirginia,——
Justyouchipin,SayyouknewFlynn;
Saythatyou’vebeen’yar。
\"CICELY\"
(ALKALISTATION)
Cicelysaysyou’reapoet;maybe,——Iain’tmuchonrhyme:
Ireckonyou’dgivemeahundred,andbeatmeeverytime。
Poetry!——that’sthewaysomechapsputsupanidee,ButItakesmine\"straightwithoutsugar,\"andthat’swhat’sthematterwithme。
Poetry!——justlookroundyou,——alkali,rock,andsage;
Sage-brush,rock,andalkali;ain’titaprettypage!
Sunintheeastatmornin’,suninthewestatnight,Andtheshadowofthis’yerstationtheon’ythingmovesinsight。
Poetry!——Wellnow——Polly!Polly,runtoyourmam;
Runrightaway,mypooty!By-by!Ain’tshealamb?
Poetry!——thatremindsmeo’suthin’rightinthatsuit:
Jestshetthatdoorthar,willyer?——forCicely’searsiscute。
YenoticedPolly,——thebaby?Amonthaforeshewasborn,Cicely——myoldwoman——wasmoody-likeandforlorn;
Outofherheadandcrazy,andtalkedofflowersandtrees;
Familymanyourself,sir?Well,youknowwhatawomanbe’s。
Narvousshewas,andrestless,——saidthatshe\"couldn’tstay。\"
Stay!——andthenearestwomanseventeenmilesaway。
ButIfixeditupwiththedoctor,andhesaidhewouldbeonhand,AndIkinderstuckbytheshanty,andfencedinthatbito’land。
Onenight,——thetenthofOctober,——Iwokewithachillandafright,Forthedooritwasstandingopen,andCicelywarn’tinsight,Butanotewaspinnedontheblanket,whichitsaidthatshe\"couldn’tstay,\"
Buthadgonetovisitherneighbor,——seventeenmilesaway!
Whenandhowshestampeded,Ididn’twaitfortosee,Foroutintheroad,nextminit,Istartedaswildasshe;
Runningfirstthiswayandthatway,likeahoundthatisoffthescent,Fortherewarn’tnotrackinthedarknesstotellmethewayshewent。
I’vehadsomemightymeanmomentsaforeIkemtothisspot,——
LostonthePlainsin’50,drowndedalmostandshot;
Butoutonthisalkalidesert,a-huntingacrazywife,Wasra’lyason-satis-factoryasanythinginmylife。
\"Cicely!Cicely!Cicely!\"Icalled,andIheldmybreath,And\"Cicely!\"camefromthecanyon,——andallwasasstillasdeath。
And\"Cicely!Cicely!Cicely!\"camefromtherocksbelow,Andjestbutawhisperof\"Cicely!\"downfromthempeaksofsnow。
Iain’twhatyoucallreligious,——butIjestlookeduptothesky,And——this’yer’stowhatI’mcoming,andmaybeyethinkIlie:
Butupawaytotheeast’ard,yallerandbigandfar,Isawofasuddentrisingthesingleristkindofstar。
Bigandyalleranddancing,itseemedtobeckontome:
Yallerandbiganddancing,suchasyouneversee:
Bigandyalleranddancing,——Ineversawsuchastar,AndIthoughtofthemsharpsintheBible,andIwentforitthenandthar。
OverthebrushandbowldersIstumbledandpushedahead,Keepingthestaraforeme,Iwentwhereveritled。
Itmighthevbeenforanhour,whensuddentandpeartandnigh,Outoftheyearthaforemetharrizupababy’scry。
Listen!thar’sthesamemusic;butherlungstheyarestrongernowThanthedayIpackedherandhermother,——I’mdernedifIjestknowhow。
Butthedoctorkemthenextminit,andthejokeo’thewholethingisThatCisneverknewwhathappenedfromthatverynighttothis!
ButCicelysaysyou’reapoet,andmaybeyoumight,someday,Jestslingherarhyme’boutababythatwasborninacuriousway,Andseewhatshesays;and,oldfellow,whenyouspeakofthestar,don’ttellAshow’twasthedoctor’slantern,——formaybe’twon’tsoundsowell。
PENELOPE
(SIMPSON’SBAR,1858)
Soyou’vekem’yeragen,Andoneanswerwon’tdo?
Well,ofallthedernedmenThatI’vestruck,itisyou。
OSal!’yer’sthatdernedfoolfromSimpson’s,cavortin’round’yerinthedew。
Kemin,efyouWILL。
Thar,——quit!Takeacheer。
Notthat;youcan’tfillThemtheercushingsthisyear,——
Forthatcheerwasmyoldman’s,JoeSimpson,andtheydon’tmakesuchmenabout’yer。
Hewastall,wasmyJack,Andasstrongasatree。
Thar’shisgunontherack,——
Jestyouheftit,andsee。
AndYOUcomeacourtin’hiswidder!Lord!wherecanthatcritter,Sal,be!
You’dfillmyJack’splace?
Andamanofyoursize,——
Withnobairdtohisface,Norasnaptohiseyes,Andnary——Sho!thar!Iwasfoolin’,——Iwas,Joe,forsartain,——don’trise。
Sitdown。Law!why,sho!
I’masweakasagal。
Sal!Don’tyougo,Joe,OrI’llfaint,——sure,Ishall。
Sitdown,——ANYWHEER,whereyoulike,Joe,——inthatcheer,ifyouchoose,——Lord!where’sSal?
PLAINLANGUAGEFROMTRUTHFULJAMES
(TABLEMOUNTAIN,1870)
WhichIwishtoremark,Andmylanguageisplain,ThatforwaysthataredarkAndfortricksthatarevain,TheheathenChineeispeculiar,WhichthesameIwouldrisetoexplain。
AhSinwashisname;
AndIshallnotdeny,Inregardtothesame,Whatthatnamemightimply;
Buthissmileitwaspensiveandchildlike,AsIfrequentremarkedtoBillNye。
ItwasAugustthethird,Andquitesoftwastheskies;
WhichitmightbeinferredThatAhSinwaslikewise;
YetheplayeditthatdayuponWilliamAndmeinawayIdespise。
Whichwehadasmallgame,AndAhSintookahand:
ItwasEuchre。ThesameHedidnotunderstand;
Buthesmiledashesatbythetable,Withthesmilethatwaschildlikeandbland。
YetthecardstheywerestockedInawaythatIgrieve,AndmyfeelingswereshockedAtthestateofNye’ssleeve,Whichwasstuffedfullofacesandbowers,Andthesamewithintenttodeceive。
ButthehandsthatwereplayedBythatheathenChinee,Andthepointsthathemade,Werequitefrightfultosee,——
Tillatlastheputdownarightbower,WhichthesameNyehaddealtuntome。
ThenIlookedupatNye,Andhegazeduponme;
Andherosewithasigh,Andsaid,\"Canthisbe?
WeareruinedbyChinesecheaplabor,\"——
AndhewentforthatheathenChinee。
InthescenethatensuedIdidnottakeahand,ButtheflooritwasstrewedLiketheleavesonthestrandWiththecardsthatAhSinhadbeenhiding,Inthegame\"hedidnotunderstand。\"
Inhissleeves,whichwerelong,Hehadtwenty-fourpacks,——
Whichwascomingitstrong,YetIstatebutthefacts;
Andwefoundonhisnails,whichweretaper,Whatisfrequentintapers,——that’swax。
WhichiswhyIremark,Andmylanguageisplain,ThatforwaysthataredarkAndfortricksthatarevain,TheheathenChineeispeculiar,——
WhichthesameIamfreetomaintain。
THESOCIETYUPONTHESTANISLAUS
IresideatTableMountain,andmynameisTruthfulJames;
Iamnotuptosmalldeceitoranysinfulgames;
AndI’lltellinsimplelanguagewhatIknowabouttherowThatbrokeupourSocietyupontheStanislow。
ButfirstIwouldremark,thatitisnotaproperplanForanyscientificgenttowhalehisfellow-man,And,ifamemberdon’tagreewithhispeculiarwhim,Tolayforthatsamememberforto\"putahead\"onhim。
NownothingcouldbefinerormorebeautifultoseeThanthefirstsixmonths’proceedingsofthatsameSociety,TillBrownofCalaverasbroughtalotoffossilbonesThathefoundwithinatunnelnearthetenementofJones。
ThenBrownhereadapaper,andhereconstructedthere,Fromthosesamebones,ananimalthatwasextremelyrare;
AndJonesthenaskedtheChairforasuspensionoftherules,Tillhecouldprovethatthosesameboneswasoneofhislostmules。
ThenBrownhesmiledabittersmile,andsaidhewasatfault,ItseemedhehadbeentrespassingonJones’sfamilyvault;
Hewasamostsarcasticman,thisquietMr。Brown,Andonseveraloccasionshehadcleanedoutthetown。
NowIholditisnotdecentforascientificgentTosayanotherisanass,——atleast,toallintent;
NorshouldtheindividualwhohappenstobemeantReplybyheavingrocksathim,toanygreatextent。
ThenAbnerDeanofAngel’sraisedapointoforder,whenAchunkofoldredsandstonetookhimintheabdomen,Andhesmiledakindofsicklysmile,andcurleduponthefloor,Andthesubsequentproceedingsinterestedhimnomore。
For,inlesstimethanIwriteit,everymemberdidengageInawarfarewiththeremnantsofapalaeozoicage;
Andthewaytheyheavedthosefossilsintheirangerwasasin,TilltheskullofanoldmammothcavedtheheadofThompsonin。
AndthisisallIhavetosayoftheseimpropergames,ForIliveatTableMountain,andmynameisTruthfulJames;
AndI’vetoldinsimplelanguagewhatIknowabouttherowThatbrokeupourSocietyupontheStanislow。
LUKE
(INTHECOLORADOPARK,1873)
Wot’sthatyou’rereadin’?——anovel?Anovel!——well,darnmyskin!
Youamangrownandbeardedandhistin’suchstuffezthatin——
Stuffaboutgalsandtheirsweethearts!Nowonderyou’rethinezaknife。
Lookatme——clartwohundred——andneverreadoneinmylife!
That’smyopiniono’novels。Andeztotheirlyin’roundhere,TheybelongtotheJedge’sdaughter——theJedgewhocameuplastyearOnaccountofhislungsandthemountainsandthebalsamo’pineandfir;
Andhisdaughter——well,shereadnovels,andthat’swhat’sthematterwithher。
YetshewassweetontheJedge,andstuckbyhimdayandnight,Aloneinthecabinup’yer——tillshegrewlikeaghost,allwhite。
Shewusonlyaslipofathing,ezlightandezupandawayEzriflesmokeblownthroughthewoods,butshewasn’tmykind——noway!
Speakin’o’gals,d’yemindthathouseezyourisethehill,AmileandahalffromWhite’s,andjistaboveMattingly’smill?
Youdo?WellnowTHAR’sagal!What!yousawher?Oh,comenow,thar!quit!
Shewasonlybedevlin’youboys,fortomeshedon’tcottononebit。
Nowshe’swhatIcallagal——ezprettyandplumpezaquail;
Teethezwhiteezahound’s,andthey’dgothroughaten-pennynail;
Eyesthatkinsnaplikeacap。Sosheaskedtoknow\"wharIwashid?\"
Shedid!Oh,it’sjistlikehersass,forshe’speartezaKatydid。
ButwhatwasItalkingof?——Oh!theJedgeandhisdaughter——shereadNovelsthewholedaylong,andIreckonshereadthemabed;
AndsometimesshereadthemoutloudtotheJedgeontheporchwherehesat,And’twashow\"LordAugustus\"saidthis,andhow\"LadyBlanche\"shesaidthat。
ButthesickestofallthatIheerdwasayarnthettheyread’boutachap,\"Leather-stocking\"byname,andahunterchockfullo’thegreenesto’sap;
Andtheyaskedmetohear,butIsays,\"MissMabel,notanyforme;
WhenIlikesIkinslingmyownlies,andthetchapandIshouldn’tagree。\"
YetsomehoworotherthatgalallussaidthatIbroughthertomindOffolksaboutwhomshehadread,orsuthinbelikeofthetkind,Andtharwarn’tnoendo’thenamesthatshegivemethetsummeruphere——
\"RobinHood,\"\"Leather-stocking\"\"RobRoy,\"——Oh,Itellyou,thecritterwasqueer!
Andyet,efshehadn’tbeenspiled,shewasharmlessenoughinherway;
ShecouldjabberinFrenchtoherdad,andtheysaidthatsheknewhowtoplay;
Andsheworkedmethatshot-pouchupthar,whichthemandoesn’tliveezkinuse;
Andslippers——yousee’emdown’yer——ezwouldcradleanInjin’spapoose。
Yetalongo’themnovels,yousee,shewaswastin’andmopin’away,Andthenshegotshywithhertongue,andatlastshehadnothin’tosay;
AndwheneverIhappenedaround,herfaceitwashidbyabook,Anditwarn’ttillthedaysheleftthatshegivemeezmuchezalook。
Andthiswasthewayitwas。ItwasnightwhenIkemuphereTosayto’emall\"good-by,\"forIreckonedtogofordeerAt\"sunup\"thedaytheyleft。SoIshook’emallroundbythehand,’CeptMabel,andshewassick,eztheygivemetounderstand。
ButjistezIpassedthehousenextmorningatdawn,someone,Likealittlewavero’mistgotuponthehillwiththesun;
MissMabelitwas,alone——allwrappedinamantleo’lace——
Andshestoodtherestraightintheroad,withatoucho’thesuninherface。
Andshelookedmerightintheeye——I’dseensuthin’likeitbeforeWhenIhuntedawoundeddoetotheedgeo’theClearLakeShore,AndIhadmykneeonitsneck,andIjistwasraisin’myknife,Whenitgivemealooklikethat,and——well,itgotoffwithitslife。
\"Wearegoingto-day,\"shesaid,\"andIthoughtIwouldsaygood-byToyouinyourownhouse,Luke——thesewoodsandthebrightbluesky!
You’vealwaysbeenkindtous,Luke,andpapahasfoundyoustillAsgoodastheairhebreathes,andwholesomeasLaurelTreeHill。
\"Andwe’llalwaysthinkofyou,Luke,asthethingwecouldnottakeaway,——
Thebalsamthatdwellsinthewoods,therainbowthatlivesinthespray。
Andyou’llsometimesthinkofME,Luke,asyouknowyouonceusedtosay,Ariflesmokeblownthroughthewoods,amoment,butnevertostay。\"
Andthenweshookhands。Sheturned,buta-suddentshetotteredandfell,AndIcaughthersharpbythewaist,andheldheraminit。Well,Itwasonlyaminit,youknow,thetezcoldandezwhiteshelayEzasnowflakehereonmybreast,andthen——well,shemeltedaway——
Andwasgone……Andtharareherbooks;butIsaysnotanyforme;
Goodenoughmaybeforsome,butthemandImightn’tagree。
Theyspiledadecentgalezmighthevmadesomechapawife,Andlookatme!——clartwohundred——andneverreadoneinmylife!
\"THEBABESINTHEWOODS\"
(BIGPINEFLAT,1871)
\"Somethingcharacteristic,\"eh?
Humph!IreckonyoumeanbythatSomethingthathappenedinourway,Hereatthecrossin’ofBigPineFlat。
Timesaren’tnowastheyusedtobe,Whengoldwasflushandtheboyswerefrisky,AndamanwouldpullouthisbatteryForanything——maybethepriceofwhiskey。
Nothingofthatsort,eh?That’sstrange!
Why,IthoughtyoumightbedivertedHearinghowJonesofRedRockRangeDrawedhis\"hinttotheunconverted,\"
Andsaying,\"Wharwillyouhaveit?\"shotCherokeeBobatthelastdebating!
WhatwasthequestionIforgot,ButJonesdidn’tlikeBob’swayofstating。
Nothingofthatkind,eh?YoumeanSomethingmilder?Let’ssee!——OJoe!
TelltothestrangerthatlittlesceneOutofthe\"BabesintheWoods。\"Youknow,\"Babes\"wasthenamethatwegave’em,sir,Twoleanladsintheirteens,andgreenerThaneventhebeltofspruceandfirWheretheybuilttheirnest,andeachdaygrewleaner。
Nooneknewwheretheycamefrom。NoneCaredtoaskiftheyhadamother。
Runawayschoolboys,maybe。OneTallanddarkasaspruce;theotherBlueandgoldintheeyesandhair,Softandlowinhisspeech,butrarelyTalkingwithus;andwedidn’tcareTogetattheirsecretatallunfairly。
Fortheyweresoquiet,sosadandshy,Contenttotrusteachothersolely,Thatsomehowwe’dalwaysshutoneeye,AndneverseemtoobservethemwhollyAstheypassedtotheirwork。’Twasaworn-outclaim,Anditpaidthemgrub。Theycouldlivewithoutit,FortheboyshadawayofleavinggameIntheirtent,andforgettingallaboutit。
Yetnooneaskedfortheirsecret。DumbItlayintheirbigeyes’heavyhollows。
ItwasunderstoodthatnooneshouldcomeTotheirtentunawares,savethebeesandswallows。
Sotheylivedalone。UntilonewarmnightIwassittinghereatthetent-door,——so,sir!
Whenoutofthesunset’srosylightUprosetheSheriffofMariposa。
Iknewatoncetherewassomethingwrong,Forhishandandhisvoiceshookjustalittle,Andthereisn’tmuchyoucanfetchalongTomakethesinewsofJackHillbrittle。
\"GowarntheBabes!\"hewhispered,hoarse;
\"TellthemI’mcoming——togetandscurry;
ForI’vegotastorythat’sbad,——andworse,I’vegotawarrant:G-dd——nit,hurry!\"
Toolate!theyhadseenhimcrossthehill;
IrantotheirtentandfoundthemlyingDeadineachother’sarms,andstillClaspingthedrugtheyhadtakenflying。
Andtherelaytheirsecretcoldandbare,Theirlife,theirtrial——theold,oldstory!
ForthesweetblueeyesandthegoldenhairWasaWOMAN’SshameandaWOMAN’Sglory。
\"Whowerethey?\"Asknomore,oraskThesunthatvisitstheirgravesolightly;
Askofthewhisperingreeds,ortaskThemourningcricketsthatchirrupnightly。
Alloftheirlifebutitsloveforgot,Everythingtenderandsoftandmystic,TheseareourBabesintheWoods,——you’vegot,Well——humannature——that’scharacteristic。
THELATESTCHINESEOUTRAGE
Itwasnoonbythesun;wehadfinishedourgame,Andwaspassin’remarksgoin’backtoourclaim;
Joneswascountin’hischips,Smithrelievin’hismindOfideasthata\"straight\"shouldbeat\"threeofakind,\"
WhenJohnsonofElkocamegallopin’down,Withalookonhisface’twixtagrinandafrown,Andhecalls,\"Dropyourshovelsandfacerightabout,ForthemChineesfromMurphy’sarecleanin’usout——
Withtheirching-a-ring-chowAndtheirchic-colorowThey’rebentuponmakingNoslouchofarow。\"
ThenJones——myownpardner——looksupwithasigh;
\"It’syourwash-bill,\"sezhe,andIanswers,\"Youlie!\"
Butaforehecoulddrawortheotherscouldarm,UptumblestheBatesboys,whoheardthealarm。
Andayellfromthehill-topandroarofagong,Mixedupwithremarkslike\"Hi!yi!Chang-a-wong,\"
Andbombs,shells,andcrackers,thatcrashedthroughthetrees,Revealedintheirwar-togsfourhundredChinees!
FourhundredChinee;
Weareeight,don’tyesee!
ThatmadeasquarefiftyTojustoneo’we。
Theyweredressedintheirbest,butIgrievethatthatsameWaslargelymadeupofourown,totheirshame;
Andmypardner’sbestshirtandhistrouserswerehungOnaspear,andabovehimweretauntinglyswung;
Whilethatbeggar,CheyLee,likeaconjurersatPullin’outeggsandchickensfromJohnson’sbesthat;
AndBates’sgameroosterwaspartoftheir\"loot,\"
AndallofSmith’spigswereskyugledtoboot;
ButtheclimaxwasreachedandIliketohavediedWhenmydemijohn,empty,camedownthehillside,——
Downthehillside——
WhatonceheldtheprideOfRobertsonCountyPitcheddownthehillside!
Thenweaxedforaparley。WhenoutofthedinTothefrontcomesa-rockin’thatheathen,AhSin!
\"Youoweflowtydollee——mewasheeyoucamp,Youcatcheemywashee——mecatcheenostamp;
Onedollarhapdozen,menocatcheeyet,Nowthatflowtydollee——nohab?——howcanget?
Mecatcheeyoupiggee——meselleeforcash,Itcatcheemelicee——youcatcheeno’hash;’
MebellygoodSheliff——melebbeewhencan,MealleesamehalppinasMelicanman!
ButMelicanmanHewasheehimpanOnBOTTOMsidehilleeAndcatchee——howcan?\"
\"Arewemen?\"saysJoeJohnson,\"andlisttothisjaw,Withoutprocessofwarrantorcoloroflaw?
Arewemenor——a-chew!\"——herebegaspedinhisspeech,Forastink-pothadfallenjustoutofhisreach。
\"Shallwestandhereasidle,andletAsiapourHerbarbarichordesonthiscivilizedshore?
HastheWhiteMannocountry?Areweleftinthelurch?
Andlikewisewhat’sgoneoftheEstablishedChurch?
Onemantofourhundredisgreatodds,Iown,Butthis’yer’saWhiteMan——Iplaysitalone!\"
Andhesprangupthehillside——tostophimnonedare——
Tillayellfromthetoptolda\"WhiteManwasthere!\"
AWhiteManwasthere!
WeprayedhemightspareThosemisguidedheathensThefewclothestheywear。
Theyfled,andhefollowed,butnomatterwhere;
Theyfledtoescapehim,——the\"WhiteManwasthere,\"——
Tillwemissedfirsthisvoiceonthepine-woodedslope,Andweknewfortheheathenhenceforthwasnohope;
Andtheyellstheygrewfainter,whenPetersensaid,\"Itsimplywashumantoburyhisdead。\"
Andthen,withslowtread,Wecreptup,indread,Butfoundnarymortalthere,Livingordead。
Buttherewashistrail,andthewaythattheycame,Andyonder,nodoubt,hewasbagginghisgame。
WhenJonesdropshispickaxe,andThompsonsays\"Shoo!\"
Andbothof’empointstoacageofbambooHangingdownfromatree,withalabelthatswungConspicuous,withlettersinsomeforeigntongue,Which,whenfreelytranslated,thesamedidappearWastheChineseforsaying,\"AWhiteManishere!\"
Andaswedrewnear,Inangerandfear,Boundhandandfoot,JohnsonLookeddownwithaleer!
Inhismouthwasanopiumpipe——whichwaswhyHeleeredatussowithadrunken-likeeye!
Theyhadshavedoffhiseyebrows,andtackedonacue,Theyhadpaintedhisfaceofacopperyhue,Andriggedhimallupinaheathenishsuit,Thensoftlydeparted,eachmanwithhis\"loot。\"
Yes,everygaloot,AndAhSin,toboot,HadlefthimtherehangingLikeripeningfruit。
AtamassmeetingheldupatMurphy’snextdayTherewereseventeenspeakersandeachhadhissay;
Thereweretwelveresolutionsthatinstantlypassed,Andeachresolutionwasworsethanthelast;
Therewerefourteenpetitions,which,grantingthesame,WilldeterminewhatGovernorMurphy’sshallname;
AndthemanfromourdistrictthatgoesupnextyearGoesupononeissue——that’spatentandclear:
\"Cantheworkofamean,Degraded,uncleanBelieverinBuddhaBeheldasalien?\"
TRUTHFULJAMESTOTHEEDITOR
(YREKA,1873)
WhichitisnotmystyleToproduceneedlesspainBystatementsthatrileOrthatgo’ginthegrain,Buthere’sCaptainJackstilla-livin’,andNyehasnoskelponhisbrain!
OnthatCaucasianheadThereisnocrownofhair;
Ithasgone,ithasfled!
AndEchosez\"Where?\"
AndIasks,\"IsthisNationaWhiteMan’s,andisgenerallythingsonthesquare?\"
ShewasknowninthecampAs\"Nye’sothersquaw,\"
AndfolksofthatstampHeznorightsinthelaw,Butistreacherous,sinful,andslimy,asNyemighthevwellknownbefore。
ButshesaidthatsheknewWheretheInjinswashid,Andthestatementwastrue,Foritseemedthatshedid,SincesheledWilliamwherehewascoveredbyseventeenModocs,and——
slid!
Thentheyreachedforhishair;
ButNyesez,\"BythelawOfnations,forbear!
Isurrenders——nomore:
AndIlookstobetreated,——youhearme?——asapris’ner,apris’nerofwar!\"
ButCaptainJackroseAndhesez,\"It’stoothin!
SuchstatementsasthoseIt’stoolatetobegin。
There’saMODOCINDICTMENTaginyou,OPaleface,andyou’regoin’in!
\"YoustoleSchonchin’ssquawIntheyearsixty-two;
Itwasinsixty-fourThatLongJackyouwentthrough,AndyouburnedNastyJim’srancheria,andhiswivesandhispapoosestoo。
\"ThisguninmyhandWassoldmebyyou’Gainstthelawoftheland,AndIgrievesitistrue!\"
Andheburiedhisfaceinhisblanketandweptashehiditfromview。
Butyou’retriedandcondemned,Andskelping’syourdoom,\"
Andhepausedandhehemmed——
Butwhythisresume?
Hewasskelped’gainstthecustomofnations,andcutofflikearoseinitsbloom。
SoIaskswithoutguile,AndItrustsnotinvain,IfthisisthestyleThatisgoingtoobtain——
Ifhere’sCaptainJackstilla-livin’,andNyewithnoskelponhisbrain?
ANIDYLOFTHEROAD
(SIERRAS,1876)
DRAMATISPERSONAE
FirstTouristSecondTouristYubaBill,DriverAStrangerFIRSTTOURIST
Lookhowtheuplandplungesintocover,Greenwherethepinesfadesullenlyaway。
Wonderfulthoseolivedepths!andwonderful,moreover——
SECONDTOURIST
Thereddustthatrisesinasuffocatingway。
FIRSTTOURIST
Smallisthesoulthatcannotsoaraboveit,Cannotbutclingtoitsever-kindredclay:
Betterbeyonbird,thatseemstobreatheandloveit——
SECONDTOURIST
Doubtlessahawkorsomeotherbirdofprey。
Werewe,likehim,assureofadinnerThatonourstomachswouldcomfortablystay;
Orwerethefriedhamashadeortwojustthinner,Thatmustconfrontusatclosingoftheday:
ThenmightyousinglikeTheocritusorVirgil,Thenmightweeachmakeametricalessay;
Butversejustnow——Imustprotestandurge——illFitsadigestionbytravelledastray。
CHORUSOFPASSENGERS
Speed,YubaBill!oh,speedustoourdinner!
Speedtothesunsetthatbeckonsfaraway。
SECONDTOURIST
WilliamofYuba,OSonofNimshi,hearken!
Checkthyprofanity,butnotthychariot’splay。
Tellus,OWilliam,beforetheshadowsdarken,Where,and,oh!howweshalldine?OWilliam,say!
YUBABILL
Itain’tmyfault,northeKumpeney’s,Ireckon,Yecan’tgetezsquaremealezanyontheBay,Upatyouplace,wharthesenset’pearstobeckon——
Ezthetsharpallowsinhisairysorto’way。
Tharwozaplaceworyerhashyemighthevwrestled,Keptbyawomanezchipperezajay——
Warminherbreastallthemorningsunshinenestled;
Redonhercheeksalltheevening’ssunshinelay。
SECONDTOURIST
Praiseisbutbreath,Ochariotcompeller!
Yetofthathashwewouldbidyoufarthersay。
YUBABILL
Tharwozasnipe——likeyou,afancytourist——
Kemtothatrancheziftomakeastay,Ranoffthegal,andruinedjistthepuristCritterthatlived——
STRANGER(quietly)
You’realiar,driver!
YUBABILL(reachingforhisrevolver)。
Eh!
Heretakemylines,somebody——
CHORUSOFPASSENGERS
Hush,boys!listen!
Insidethere’salady!Remember!Noaffray!
YUBABILL
Efthatmanlives,thefaultain’tmineorhis’n。
STRANGER
Waitforthesunsetthatbeckonsfaraway,Then——asyouwill!But,meantime,friends,believeme,Nowhereonearthlivesapurerwoman;nay,Ifmyperceptionsdosurelynotdeceiveme,Sheistheladywehaveinsideto-day。
Asfortheman——youseethatblackenedpinetree,Upwhichthegreenvinecreepsheavenwardaway!
Hewasthatscarredtrunk,andshethevinethatsweetlyClothedhimwithlifeagain,andlifted——
SECONDTOURIST
Yes;butprayHowknowyouthis?
STRANGER
She’smywife。
YUBABILL
Theh-llyousay!
THOMPSONOFANGELS
ItisthestoryofThompson——ofThompson,theheroofAngels。
FrequentlydrunkwasThompson,butalwayspolitetothestranger;
LightandfreewasthetouchofThompsonuponhisrevolver;
Greatthemortalityincidentonthatlightnessandfreedom。
YetnothappyorgaywasThompson,theheroofAngels;
Oftenspoketohimselfinaccentsofanguishandsorrow,\"WhydoImakethegravesofthefrivolousyouthwhoinfollyThoughtlesslypassmyrevolver,forgettingitslightnessandfreedom?
\"Whyinmydailywalksdoesthesurgeondrophislefteyelid,Theundertakersmile,andthesculptorofgravestonemarblesLeanonhischiselandgaze?Icarenoto’ermuchforattention;
SimpleamIinmyways,savebutforthislightnessandfreedom。\"
Sospakethatpensiveman——thisThompson,theheroofAngels,Bitterlysmiledtohimself,ashestrodethroughthechapparalmusing。
\"Why,oh,why?\"echoedthepinesinthedarkolivedepthfarresounding。
\"Why,indeed?\"whisperedthesagebrushthatbent’neathhisfeetnon-elastic。
Pleasantindeedwasthatmornthatdawnedo’erthebarroomatAngels,Whereintheirmanhood’sprimewasgatheredtheprideofthehamlet。
Six\"tooksugarintheirs,\"andninetothebarkeeperlightlySmiledastheysaid,\"Well,Jim,youcangiveusourregularfusil。\"
Suddenlyasthegrayhawkswoopsdownonthebarnyard,alightingWhere,pensivelypickingtheircorn,thefavoritepulletsaregathered,Sointhatfestivebar-roomdroppedThompson,theheroofAngels,Graspinghisweapondreadwithhispristinelightnessandfreedom。
Neverawordhespoke;divestinghimselfofhisgarments,Dancedthewar-danceoftheplayfulyettruculentModoc,Utteredasinglewhoop,andthen,intheaccentsofchallenge,Spake:\"Oh,beholdinmeaCrestedJayHawkofthemountain。\"
Thenroseapallidman——amansickwithfeverandague;
Smallwashe,andhisstepwastremulous,weak,anduncertain;
SlowlyaDerringerdrew,andcoveredthepersonofThompson;
Saidinhisfeeblestpipe,\"I’maBald-headedSnipeoftheValley。\"
Asonitsnativeplainsthekangaroo,startledbyhunters,Leapswithsuccessivebounds,andhurriesawaytothethickets,SoleapedtheCrestedHawk,andquietlyhoppingbehindhimRan,andoccasionallyshot,thatBald-headedSnipeoftheValley。
VainatthefestivebarstilllingeredthepeopleofAngels,Hearingafarinthewoodsthepetulantpopofthepistol;
NeveragainreturnedtheCrestedJayHawkofthemountains,NeveragainwasseentheBald-headedSnipeoftheValley。
YetinthehamletofAngels,whentruculentspeechesareuttered,Whenbloodshedandlifealonewillatoneforsometriflingmisstatement,MaidensandmenintheirprimerecallthelastheroofAngels,ThinkofandvainlyregrettheBald-headedSnipeoftheValley!
THEHAWK’SNEST
(SIERRAS)
Wecheckedourpace,theredroadsharplyrounding;
WeheardthetroubledflowOfthedarkolivedepthsofpinesresoundingAthousandfeetbelow。
Abovethetumultofthecanyonlifted,Thegrayhawkbreathlesshung,OronthehillawingedshadowdriftedWherefurzeandthorn-bushclung;
Orwherehalf-waythemountainsidewasfurrowedWithmanyaseamandscar;
Orsomeabandonedtunneldimlyburrowed,——
Amole-hillseensofar。
WelookedinsilencedownacrossthedistantUnfathomablereach:
Asilencebrokenbytheguide’sconsistentAndrealisticspeech。
\"WalkerofMurphy’sblewaholethroughPetersFortellinghimhelied;
ThenupanddustedoutofSouthHornitosAcrosstheLongDivide。
\"WeranhimoutofStrong’s,andupthroughEden,And’crossthefordbelow,Andupthiscanyon(Peters’brotherleadin’),AndmeandClarkandJoe。
\"Hefou’tusgame:somehowIdisrememberJesthowthethingkemround;
Somesay’twaswadding,someascatteredemberFromfiresontheground。
\"ButinoneminuteallthehillbelowhimWasjustonesheetofflame;
Guardin’thecrest,SamClarkandIcalledtohim,And,——well,thedogwasgame!
\"Hemadenosign:thefiresofhellwereroundhim,Thepitofhellbelow。
Wesatandwaited,butweneverfoundhim;
Andthenweturnedtogo。
\"Andthen——youseethatrockthat’sgrownsobristlyWithchapparalandtan——
Suthincrep’out:itmighthevbeenagrizzlyItmighthevbeenaman;
\"Suthinthathowled,andgnasheditsteeth,andshoutedInsmokeanddustandflame;
Suthinthatsprangintothedepthsaboutit,Grizzlyorman,——butgame!
\"That’sall!Well,yes,itdoeslookratherrisky,AndkindermakesonequeerAnddizzylookingdown。AdropofwhiskeyAin’tabadthingrighthere!\"
HERLETTER
I’msittingalonebythefire,DressedjustasIcamefromthedance,InarobeevenYOUwouldadmire,——
ItcostacoolthousandinFrance;
I’mbe-diamondedoutofallreason,Myhairisdoneupinacue:
Inshort,sir,\"thebelleoftheseason\"
Iswastinganhouruponyou。
AdozenengagementsI’vebroken;
Ileftinthemidstofaset;
Likewiseaproposal,halfspoken,Thatwaits——onthestairs——formeyet。
Theysayhe’llberich,——whenhegrowsup,——
Andthenheadoresmeindeed;
Andyou,sir,areturningyournoseup,Threethousandmilesoffasyouread。
\"AndhowdoIlikemyposition?\"
\"AndwhatdoIthinkofNewYork?\"
\"Andnow,inmyhigherambition,WithwhomdoIwaltz,flirt,ortalk?\"
\"Andisn’titnicetohaveriches,Anddiamondsandsilks,andallthat?\"
\"Andaren’ttheyachangetotheditchesAndtunnelsofPovertyFlat?\"
Well,yes,——ifyousawusoutdrivingEachdayinthePark,four-in-hand,IfyousawpoordearmammacontrivingTolooksupernaturallygrand,——
Ifyousawpapa’spicture,astakenByBrady,andtintedatthat,You’dneversuspecthesoldbaconAndflouratPovertyFlat。
Andyet,justthismoment,whensittingIntheglareofthegrandchandelier,——
InthebustleandglitterbefittingThe\"finestsoireeoftheyear,\"——
InthemistsofagazedeChambery,Andthehumofthesmallestoftalk,——
Somehow,Joe,Ithoughtofthe\"Ferry,\"
Andthedancethatwehadon\"TheFork;\"
OfHarrison’sbarn,withitsmusterOfflagsfestoonedoverthewall;
OfthecandlesthatshedtheirsoftlustreAndtallowonhead-dressandshawl;
Ofthestepsthatwetooktoonefiddle,Ofthedressofmyqueervis-a-vis;
AndhowIoncewentdownthemiddleWiththemanthatshotSandyMcGee;
OfthemoonthatwasquietlysleepingOnthehill,whenthetimecametogo;
OfthefewbabypeaksthatwerepeepingFromundertheirbedclothesofsnow;
Ofthatride——thattomewastherarest;
Of——thesomethingyousaidatthegate。
Ah!Joe,thenIwasn’tanheiressTo\"thebest-payingleadintheState。\"
Well,well,it’sallpast;yetit’sfunnyTothink,asIstoodintheglareOffashionandbeautyandmoney,ThatIshouldbethinking,rightthere,Ofsomeonewhobreastedhighwater,AndswamtheNorthFork,andallthat,JusttodancewitholdFolinsbee’sdaughter,TheLilyofPovertyFlat。
Butgoodness!whatnonsenseI’mwriting!
(Mammasaysmytastestillislow),Insteadofmytriumphsreciting,I’mspooningonJoseph,——heigh-ho!
AndI’mtobe\"finished\"bytravel,——
Whatever’sthemeaningofthat。
Oh,whydidpapastrikepaygravelIndriftingonPovertyFlat?
Good-night!——here’stheendofmypaper;
Good-night!——ifthelongitudeplease,——
Formaybe,whilewastingmytaper,YOURsun’sclimbingoverthetrees。
Butknow,ifyouhaven’tgotriches,Andarepoor,dearestJoe,andallthat,Thatmyheart’ssomewherethereintheditches,Andyou’vestruckit,——onPovertyFlat。
HISANSWERTO\"HERLETTER\"
(REPORTEDBYTRUTHFULJAMES)
Beingaskedbyanintimateparty,——
WhichthesameIwouldtermasafriend,——
Thoughhishealthitwerevaintocallhearty,Sincethemindtodeceititmightlend;
Forhisarmitwasbrokenquiterecent,Andthere’ssomethinggonewrongwithhislung,——
WhichiswhyitisproperanddecentIshouldwritewhatherunsoffhistongue。
First,hesays,Miss,he’sreadthroughyourletterTotheend,——and\"theendcametoosoon;\"
Thata\"slightillnesskepthimyourdebtor,\"
(Whichforweekshewaswildasaloon);
That\"hisspiritsarebuoyantasyoursis;\"
Thatwithyou,Miss,he\"challengesFate,\"
(WhichthelanguagethatinvalidusesAttimesitwerevaintorelate)。
Andhesays\"thatthemountainsarefairerForoncebeingheldinyourthought;\"
Thateachrock\"holdsawealththatisrarerThaneverbygold-seekersought。\"
(Whicharewordshewouldputinthesepages,Byapartynotgiventoguile;
Thoughtheclaimnot,atdate,payingwages,Mightproduceinthesinfulasmile。)
HerememberstheballattheFerry,Andtheride,andthegate,andthevow,Andtherosethatyougavehim,——thatverySameroseheis\"treasuringnow。\"
(Whichhisblankethe’skickedonhistrunk,Miss,AndinsistsonhislegsbeingfreeAndhislanguagetomefromhisbunk,Miss,Isfrequentandpainfulandfree。)
Hehopesyouarewearingnowillows,Butarehappyandgayallthewhile;
Thatheknows——(whichthisdodgingofpillowsImpartsbutsmalleasetothestyle,Andthesameyouwillpardon)——heknows,Miss,That,thoughpartedbymanyamile,Yet,wereHElyingunderthesnows,Miss,They’dmeltintotearsatyoursmile。\"
And\"you’llstillthinkofhiminyourpleasures,Inyourbrieftwilightdreamsofthepast;
Inthisgreenlaurelspraythathetreasures,——
Itwaspluckedwhereyourpartingwaslast;
Inthisspecimen,——butasmalltrifle,——
Itwilldoforapinforyourshawl。\"
(Which,thetruthnottowickedlystifle,Washislastweek’s\"cleanup,\"——andHISALL。)
He’sasleep,whichthesamemightseemstrange,Miss,WereitnotthatIscorntodenyThatIraisedhislastdose,forachange,Miss,Inviewthathisfeverwashigh;
Butheliestherequitepeacefulandpensive。
Andnow,myrespects,Miss,toyou;
Whichmylanguage,althoughcomprehensive,Mightseemtobefreedom,istrue。
ForIhaveasmallfavortoaskyou,Asconcernsabull-pup,andthesame,——
Ifthedutywouldnotovertaskyou,——
Youwouldpleasetoprocureforme,GAME;
AndsendperexpresstotheFlat,Miss,——
FortheysayYorkisfamedforthebreed,Which,thoughwordsofdeceitmaybethat,Miss,I’lltrusttoyourtaste,Miss,indeed。