Hoopdriverdrewhiswatchhastily。\"Isay,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,showingittoher,\"don’tyouthinkweoughttobegettingon?\"
Hisfacewasflushed,hisearsbrightred。Sheascribedhisconfusiontomodesty。Herosewithalionaddedtotheburthensofhisconscience,andheldouthishandtoassisther。TheywalkeddownintoCoshamagain,resumedtheirmachines,andwentonataleisurelypacealongthenorthernshoreofthebigharbour。ButMr。Hoopdriverwasnolongerhappy。Thishorrible,thisfulsomelie,stuckinhismemory。WhyHADhedoneit?ShedidnotaskforanymoreSouthAfricanstories,happily——atleastuntilPorchesterwasreached——buttalkedinsteadofLivingOne’sOwnLife,andhowcustomhungonpeoplelikechains。Shetalkedwonderfully,andsetHoopdriver’smindfermenting。BytheCastle,Mr。Hoopdrivercaughtseveralcrabsinlittleshorepools。AtFarehamtheystoppedforasecondtea,andlefttheplacetowardsthehourofsunset,undersuchinvigoratingcircumstancesasyoushallinduecoursehear。
THERESCUEEXPEDITION
XXX
Andnowtotellofthoseenergeticchevaliers,Widgery,Dangle,andPhipps,andofthatdistressedbeauty,’ThomasPlantagenet,’
wellknowninsociety,sotheparagraphssaid,asMrs。Milton。WeleftthematMidhurststation,ifIrememberrightly,waiting,inastateoffineemotion,fortheChichestertrain。ItwasclearlyunderstoodbytheentireRescuePartythatMrs。Miltonwasbearingupbravelyagainstalmostoverwhelminggrief。Thethreegentlemenoutdidoneanotherinsympatheticexpedients;theywatchedhergravelyalmosttenderly。ThesubstantialWidgerytuggedathismoustache,andlookedhisunspeakablefeelingsatherwiththosedog—like,browneyesofhis;theslenderDangletuggedatHISmoustache,anddidwhathecouldwithunsympatheticgreyones。Phipps,unhappily,hadnomoustachetorunanyriskswith,sohefoldedhisarmsandtalkedinabrave,indifferent,bearing—uptoneabouttheLondon,Brighton,andSouthCoastRailway,justtocheerthepoorwomanupalittle。AndevenMrs。
Miltonreallyfeltthatexaltedmelancholytotheverybottomofherheart,andtriedtoshowitinadozenlittle,delicate,feminineways。
\"ThereisnothingtodountilwegettoChichester,\"saidDangle。
\"Nothing。\"
\"Nothing,\"saidWidgery,andasideinherear:\"Youreallyatescarcelyanything,youknow。\"
\"Theirtrainsarealwayslate,\"saidPhipps,withhisfingersalongtheedgeofhiscollar。Dangle,youmustunderstand,wasasub—editorandreviewer,andhispridewastobeThomasPlantagenet’sintellectualcompanion。Widgery,thebigman,wasmanagerofabankandamightygolfer,andhisconceptionofhisrelationstohernevercameintohismindwithoutthosecharmingoldlines,\"Douglas,Douglas,tenderandtrue,\"fallingharduponitsheels。HisnamewasDouglas—DouglasWidgery。AndPhipps,Phippswasamedicalstudentstill,andhefeltthathelaidhisheartatherfeet,theheartofamanoftheworld。Shewaskindtothemallinherway,andinsistedontheirbeingfriendstogether,inspiteofadispositiontoreciprocalcriticismtheydisplayed。DanglethoughtWidgeryaPhilistine,appreciatingbutcoarselythemeritsof\"ASoulUntrammelled,\"andWidgerythoughtDanglelacked,humanity——wouldtalkinsincerelytosayacleverthing。BothDangleandWidgerythoughtPhippsabitofacub,andPhippsthoughtbothDangleandWidgeryacoupleofThunderingBounders。
\"TheywouldhavegottoChichesterintimeforlunch,\"saidDangle,inthetrain。\"After,perhaps。Andthere’snosufficientplaceintheroad。Sosoonaswegetthere,Phippsmustinquireatthechiefhotelstoseeifanyoneansweringtoherdescriptionhaslunchedthere。\"
\"Oh,I’LLinquire,\"saidPhipps。\"Willingly。IsupposeyouandWidgerywilljusthangabout——\"
HesawanexpressionofpainonMrs。Milton’sgentleface,andstoppedabruptly。
\"No,\"saidDangle,\"weshan’tHANGABOUT,asyouputit。TherearetwoplacesinChichesterwheretouristsmightgo——thecathedralandaremarkablyfinemuseum。Ishallgotothecathedralandmakeaninquiryorso,whileWidgery——\"
\"Themuseum。Verywell。Andafterthatthere’salittlethingortwoI’vethoughtofmyself,\"saidWidgery。
TobeginwiththeytookMrs。MiltoninakindofprocessiontotheRedHotelandestablishedhertherewithsometea。\"Youaresokindtome,\"shesaid。\"Allofyou。\"Theysignifiedthatitwasnothing,anddispersedtotheirinquiries。Bysixtheyreturned,theirzealalittledamped,withoutnews。WidgerycamebackwithDangle。Phippswasthelasttoreturn。\"You’requitesure,\"saidWidgery,thatthereisn’tanyflawinthatinferenceofyours?\"
\"Quite,\"saidDangle,rathershortly。
\"Ofcourse,\"saidWidgery,\"theirstartingfromMidhurstontheChichesterroaddoesn’tabsolutelybindthemnottochangetheirminds。\"
\"Mydearfellow!——Itdoes。Reallyitdoes。Youmustallowmetohaveenoughintelligencetothinkofcross—roads。Reallyyoumust。Therearen’tanycross—roadstotemptthem。Wouldtheyturnasidehere?No。Wouldtheyturnthere?Manymorethingsareinevitablethanyoufancy。\"
\"Weshallseeatonce,\"saidWidgery,atthewindow。\"HerecomesPhipps。Formyownpart——\"
\"Phipps!\"saidMrs。Milton。\"Ishehurrying?Doeshelook——\"Sheroseinhereagerness,bitinghertremblinglip,andwenttowardsthewindow。
\"Nonews,\"saidPhipps,entering。
\"Ah!\"saidWidgery。
\"None?\"saidDangle。
\"Well,\"saidPhipps。\"Onefellowhadgotholdofaqueerstoryofamaninbicyclingclothes,whowasaskingthesamequestionaboutthistimeyesterday。\"
\"Whatquestion?\"saidMrs。Milton,intheshadowofthewindow。
Shespokeinalowvoice,almostawhisper。
\"Why——Haveyouseenayoungladyinagreybicyclingcostume?\"
Danglecaughtathislowerlip。\"What’sthat?\"hesaid。
\"Yesterday!Amanaskingafterherthen!WhatcanTHATmean?\"
\"Heavenknows,\"saidPhipps,sittingdownwearily。\"You’dbetterinfer。\"
\"Whatkindofman?\"saidDangle。
\"HowshouldIknow?——inbicyclingcostume,thefellowsaid。\"
\"Butwhatheight?——Whatcomplexion?\"
\"Didn’task,\"saidPhipps。\"DIDN’TASK!Nonsense,\"saidDangle。
\"Askhimyourself,\"saidPhipps。\"He’sanostlerchapintheWhiteHart,——short,thick—setfellow,witharedfaceandacrustymanner。Leaningupagainstthestabledoor。Smellsofwhiskey。Goandaskhim。\"
\"Ofcourse,\"saidDangle,takinghisstrawhatfromtheshadeoverthestuffedbirdonthechiffonierandturningtowardsthedoor。\"Imighthaveknown。\"
Phipps’mouthopenedandshut。
\"You’retired,I’msure,Mr。Phipps,\"saidthelady,soothingly。
\"Letmeringforsometeaforyou。\"ItsuddenlyoccurredtoPhippsthathehadlapsedalittlefromhischivalry。\"Iwasalittleannoyedatthewayherushedmetodoallthisbusiness,\"
hesaid。\"ButI’ddoahundredtimesasmuchifitwouldbringyouanynearertoher。\"Pause。\"IWOULDlikealittletea。\"
\"Idon’twanttoraiseanyfalsehopes,\"saidWidgery。\"ButIdoNOTbelievetheyevencametoChichester。Dangle’saverycleverfellow,ofcourse,butsometimestheseInferencesofhis——\"
\"Tchak!\"saidPhipps,suddenly。
\"Whatisit?\"saidMrs。Milton。
\"SomethingI’veforgotten。Iwentrightoutfromhere,wenttoeveryotherhotelintheplace,andneverthought——Butnevermind。I’llaskwhenthewaitercomes。\"
\"Youdon’tmean——\"Atap,andthedooropened。\"Tea,m’m?yes,m’m,\"saidthewaiter。
\"Oneminute,\"saidPhipps。\"Wasaladyingrey,acyclinglady——\"
\"Stoppedhereyesterday?Yessir。Stoppedthenight。Withherbrother,sir——ayounggent。\"
\"Brother!\"saidMrs。Milton,inalowtone。\"ThankGod!\"
Thewaiterglancedatherandunderstoodeverything。\"Ayounggent,sir,\"hesaid,\"veryfreewithhismoney。GivethenameofBeaumont。\"Heproceededtosomeramblingparticulars,andwascross—examinedbyWidgeryontheplansoftheyoungcouple。
\"Havant!Where’sHavant?\"saidPhipps。\"Iseemtorememberitsomewhere。\"
\"Wasthemantall?\"saidMrs。Milton,intently,\"distinguishedlooking?withalong,flaxenmoustache?andspokewithadrawl?\"
\"Well,\"saidthewaiter,andthought。\"Hismoustache,m’m,wasscarcelylong——scrubbymore,andyounglooking。\"
\"Aboutthirty—five,hewas?\"
\"No,m’m。Morelikefiveandtwenty。Notthat。\"
\"Dearme!\"saidMrs。Milton,speakinginacurious,hollowvoice,fumblingforhersalts,andshowingthefinestself—control。\"ItmusthavebeenherYOUNGERbrother——musthavebeen。\"
\"Thatwilldo,thankyou,\"saidWidgery,officiously,feelingthatshewouldbeeasierunderthisnewsurpriseifthemanweredismissed。Thewaiterturnedtogo,andalmostcollidedwithDangle,whowasenteringtheroom,pantingexcitedlyandwithapockethandkerchiefheldtohisrighteye。\"Hullo!\"saiddangle。
\"What’sup?\"
\"What’supwithYOU?\"saidPhipps。
\"Nothing——analtercationmerelywiththatdrunkenostlerofyours。Hethoughtitwasaplottoannoyhim——thattheYoungLadyinGreywasmythical。Judgedfromyourmanner。I’vegotapieceofrawmeattokeepoverit。Youhavesomenews,Isee?\"
\"Didthemanhityou?\"askedWidgery。
Mrs。MiltonroseandapproachedDangle。\"CannotIdoanything?\"
Danglewasheroic。\"Onlytellmeyournews,\"hesaid,roundthecornerofthehandkerchief。
\"Itwasinthisway,\"saidPhipps,andexplainedrathersheepishly。Whilehewasdoingso,witharunningfireofcommentaryfromWidgery,thewaiterbroughtinatrayoftea。\"A
timetable,\"saidDangle,promptly,\"forHavant。\"Mrs。Miltonpouredtwocups,andPhippsandDanglepartookinpassoverform。
Theycaughtthetrainbyahair’sbreadth。SotoHavantandinquiries。
DanglewaspuffeduptofindthathisguessofHavantwasright。
InviewofthefactthatbeyondHavanttheSouthamptonroadhasasteephillcontinuouslyontheright—handside,andtheseaontheleft,hehituponamagnificentschemeforheadingtheyoungfolksoff。HeandMrs。MiltonwouldgotoFareham,WidgeryandPhippsshouldalightoneeachattheintermediatestationsofCoshamandPorchester,andcomeonbythenexttrainiftheyhadnonews。Iftheydidnotcomeon,awiretotheFarehampostofficewastoexplainwhy。ItwasNapoleonic,andmorethanconsoledDanglefortheopenderisionoftheHavantstreetboysatthehandkerchiefwhichstillprotectedhisdamagedeye。
Moreover,theschemeansweredtoperfection。Thefugitivesescapedbyahair’sbreadth。TheywereoutsidetheGoldenAnchoratFareham,andpreparingtomount,asMrs。MiltonandDanglecameroundthecornerfromthestation。\"It’sher!\"saidMrs。
Milton,andwouldhavescreamed。\"Hist!\"saidDangle,grippingthelady’sarm,removinghishandkerchiefinhisexcitement,andleavingthepieceofmeatoverhiseye,anextraordinaryappearancewhichseemedunexpectedlytocalmher。\"Becool!\"saidDangle,glaringunderthemeat。\"Theymustnotseeus。Theywillgetawayelse。Werethereflysatthestation?\"TheyoungcouplemountedandvanishedroundthecorneroftheWinchesterroad。Haditnotbeenforthepublicityofthebusiness,Mrs。Miltonwouldhavefainted。\"SAVEHER!\"shesaid。
\"Ah!Aconveyance,\"saidDangle。\"Oneminute。\"
Heleftherinamostpatheticattitude,withherhandpressedtoherheart,andrushedintotheGoldenAnchor。Dogcartintenminutes。Emerged。Themeathadgonenow,andonesawthecoolingpuffinessoverhiseye。\"Iwillconductyoubacktothestation,\"
saidDangle;\"hurrybackhere,andpursuethem。YouwillmeetWidgeryandPhippsandtellthemIaminpursuit。\"
Shewaswhirledbacktotherailwaystationandleftthere,onahard,blistered,woodenseatinthesun。Shefelttiredanddreadfullyruffledandagitatedanddusty。Danglewas,nodoubt,mostenergeticanddevoted;butforakindly,helpfulmannercommendhertoDouglasWidgery。
MeanwhileDangle,hisfacegoldenintheeveningsun,wasdriving(aswellashecould)alarge,blackhorseharnessedintoathingcalledagig,northwestwardtowardsWinchester。Dangle,barringhisswolleneye,wasarefined—lookinglittleman,andbeworeadeerstalkercapandwasdressedindarkgrey。Hisneckwaslongandslender。Perhapsyouknowwhatgigsare,——huge,big,woodenthingsandveryhighandthehorse,too,washugeandbigandhigh,withknobbylegs,alongface,ahardmouth,andawhackingtrickofpacing。Smack,smack,smack,smackitwentalongtheroad,andhardbythechurchitshiedvigorouslyatahoodedperambulator。
ThehistoryoftheRescueExpeditionnowbecomesconfused。ItappearsthatWidgerywasextremelyindignanttofindMrs。MiltonleftaboutupontheFarehamplatform。Thedayhadirritatedhimsomehow,thoughhehadstartedwiththenoblestintentions,andheseemedgladtofindanoutletforjustifiableindignation。
\"He’ssuchaspasmodiccreature,\"saidWidgery。\"Rushingoff!AndIsupposewe’retowaithereuntilhecomesback!It’slikely。
He’ssoegotistical,isDangle。Alwayswantstomismanageeverythinghimself。\"
\"Hemeanstohelpme,\"saidMrs。Milton,alittlereproachfully,touchinghisarm。Widgerywashardlyinthemoodtobemollifiedallatonce。\"HeneednotpreventME,\"hesaid,andstopped。
\"It’snogoodtalking,youknow,andyouaretired。\"
\"Icangoon,\"shesaidbrightly,\"ifonlywefindher。\"\"WhileIwascoolingmyheelsinCoshamIboughtacountymap。\"Heproducedandopenedit。\"Here,yousee,istheroadoutofFareham。\"HeproceededwiththecalmdeliberationofabusinessmantodevelopaproposaloftakingtrainforthwithtoWinchester。\"TheyMUSTbegoingtoWinchester,\"heexplained。Itwasinevitable。To—morrowSunday,Winchesteracathedraltown,roadgoingnowhereelseoftheslightestimportance,\"ButMr。Dangle?\"
\"Hewillsimplygoonuntilhehastopasssomething,andthenhewillbreakhisneck。IhaveseenDangledrivebefore。It’sscarcelylikelyadog—cart,especiallyahireddog—cart,willovertakebicyclesinthecooloftheevening。Relyuponme,Mrs。
Milton——\"
\"Iaminyourhands,\"shesaid,withpatheticlittleness,lookingupathim,andforthemomentheforgottheexasperationoftheday。
Phipps,duringthisconversation,hadstoodinasomewhatdepressedattitude,leaningonhisstick,feelinghiscollar,andlookingfromonespeakertotheother。TheideaofleavingDanglebehindseemedtohimanexcellentone。\"Wemightleaveamessageattheplacewherehegotthedog—cart,\"hesuggested,whenhesawtheireyesmeeting。Therewasacheerfulalacrityaboutallthreeattheproposal。
ButtheynevergotbeyondBotley。Forevenastheirtrainranintothestation,amightyrumblingwasheard,therewasashoutingoverhead,theguardstoodastonishedontheplatform,andPhipps,thrustinghisheadoutofthewindow,cried,\"Therehegoes!\"andsprangoutofthecarriage。Mrs。Milton,followinginalarm,justsawit。FromWidgeryitwashidden。Botleystationliesinacutting,overheadwastheroadway,andacrossthelemonyellowsandflushedpinksofthesunset,therewhirledagreatblackmass,ahorselikealong—nosedchessknight,theupperworksofagig,andDangleintransitfromfronttoback。A
monstrousshadowapedhimacrossthecutting。Itwastheeventofasecond。Dangleseemedtojump,hangintheairmomentarily,andvanish,andafteramoment’spausecameaheart—rendingsmash。
Thentwoblackheadsrunningswiftly。
\"Bettergetout,\"saidPhippstoMrs。Milton,whostoodfascinatedinthedoorway。
Inanothermomentallthreewerehurryingupthesteps。TheyfoundDangle,hatless,standingupwithcuthandsextended,havinghishandsbrushedbyanofficioussmallboy。Abroad,uglyroadrandownhillinalongvista,andinthedistancewasalittlegroupofBotleyinhabitantsholdingthebig,blackhorse。
Evenatthatdistancetheycouldseetheexpressionofconsciousprideonthemonster’svisage。Itwasaswooden—facedahorseasyoucanimagine。ThebeastsintheTowerofLondon,onwhichthemeninarmourareperched,aretheonlyhorsesIhaveeverseenatalllikeit。However,wearenotconcernednowwiththehorse,butwithDangle。\"Hurt?\"askedPhipps,eagerly,leading。
\"Mr。Dangle!\"criedMrs。Milton,claspingherhands。
\"Hullo!\"saidDangle,notsurprisedintheslightest。\"Gladyou’vecome。Imaywantyou。BitofamessI’min——eigh?ButI’vecaught’em。AttheveryplaceIexpected,too。\"
\"Caughtthem!\"saidWidgery。Wherearethey?\"
\"Upthere,\"hesaid,withabackwardmotionofhishead。\"Aboutamileupthehill。Ileft’em。IHADto。\"
\"Idon’tunderstand,\"saidMrs。Milton,withthatrapt,painfullookagain。\"HaveyoufoundJessie?\"
\"Ihave。IwishIcouldwashthegraveloutofmyhandssomewhere。Itwaslikethis,youknow。Cameonthemsuddenlyroundacorner。Horseshiedatthebicycles。Theyweresittingbytheroadsidebotanisingflowers。Ijusthadtimetoshout,’JessieMilton,we’vebeenlookingforyou,’andthenthatconfoundedbrutebolted。Ididn’tdareturnround。Ihadallmyworktodotosavemyselfbeingturnedover,asitwas——solongasIdid,Imean。Ijustshouted,’Returntoyourfriends。Allwillbeforgiven。’AndoffIcame,clatter,clatter。Whethertheyheard——\"
\"TAKEMETOHER,\"saidMrs。Milton,withintensity,turningtowardsWidgery。
\"Certainly,\"saidWidgery,suddenlybecomingactive。\"Howfarisit,Dangle?\"
\"Mileandahalfortwomiles。Iwasdeterminedtofindthem,youknow。Isaythough——Lookatmyhands!ButIbegyourpardon,Mrs。
Milton。\"HeturnedtoPhipps。\"Phipps,Isay,whereshallIwashthegravelout?Andhavealookatmyknee?\"
\"There’sthestation,\"saidPhipps,becominghelpful。Danglemadeastep,andadamagedkneebecameevident。\"Takemyarm,\"saidPhipps。
\"Wherecanwegetaconveyance?\"askedWidgeryoftwosmallboys。
Thetwosmallboysfailedtounderstand。Theylookedatoneanother。
\"There’snotacab,notago—cart,insight,\"saidWidgery。\"It’sacaseofahorse,ahorse,mykingdomforahorse。\"
\"There’saharseallright,\"saidoneofthesmallboyswithamovementofthehead。
\"Don’tyouknowwherewecanhiretraps?askedWidgery。\"Oracartor——anything?\"askedMrs。Milton。
\"JohnOoker’sgartacart,butnoonecan’t’ire’n,\"saidthelargerofthesmallboys,partiallyavertinghisfaceandstaringdowntheroadandmakingasongofit。\"Andso’smyfeyther,for’slegusbroke。\"
\"Notacarteven!Evidently。Whatshallwedo?\"
ItoccurredtoMrs。MiltonthatifWidgerywasthemanforcourtlydevotion,Danglewasinfinitelyreadierofresource。\"I
suppose——\"shesaid,timidly。\"PerhapsifyouweretoaskMr。
Dangle——\"
AndthenallthegiltcameoffWidgery。Heansweredquiterudely。
\"ConfoundDangle!Hasn’themessedusupenough?Hemustneedsdriveaftertheminatraptotellthemwe’recoming,andnowyouwantmetoaskhim——\"
Herbeautifulblueeyeswerefilledwithtears。Hestoppedabruptly。\"I’llgoandaskDangle,\"hesaid,shortly。\"Ifyouwishit。\"Andwentstridingintothestationanddownthesteps,leavingherintheroadunderthequietinspectionofthetwolittleboys,andwithakindofballadrefrainrunningthroughherhead,\"WherearetheKnightsoftheOldenTime?\"andfeelingtiredtodeathandhungryanddustyandoutofcurl,and,inshort,amartyrwoman。
XXXI
Itgoestomyhearttotelloftheendofthatday,howthefugitivesvanishedintoImmensity;howtherewerenomoretrainshowBotleystaredunsympatheticallywithapalpabledispositiontoderision,denyingconveyanceshowthelandlordoftheHeronwassuspicious,howthenextdaywasSunday,andthehotsummer’sdayhadcrumpledthecollarofPhippsandstainedtheskirtsofMrs。Milton,anddimmedtheradiantemotionsofthewholeparty。
Dangle,withsticking—plasterandablackeye,felttheabsurdityoftheposeoftheWoundedKnight,andabandoneditafterthefaintestefforts。Recriminationsnever,perhaps,heldtheforegroundofthetalk,buttheyplayedlikesummerlightningontheedgeoftheconversation。Anddeepintheheartsofallwasagallingsenseoftheridiculous。Jessie,theythought,wasmosttoblame。Apparently,too,theworst,whichwouldhavemadethewholebusinesstragic,wasnothappening。Herewasayoungwoman——youngwomandoIsay?ameregirl!——hadchosentoleaveacomfortablehomeinSurbiton,andallthedelightsofarefinedandintellectualcircle,andhadrushedoff,trailingusafterher,posinghard,mutuallyjealous,andnowtiredandweather—worn,toflickusoffatlast,meremudfromherwheel,intothisdetestablevillagebeer—houseonaSaturdaynight!Andshehaddoneit,notforLoveandPassion,whichareseriousexcusesonemayrecogniseevenifonemustreprobate,butjustforaFreak,justforafantasticIdea;fornothing,infact,buttheoutragingofCommonSense。Yetwithal,suchwasourrestraint,thatwetalkedofherstillasonemuchmisguided,asonewhoburtheneduswithanxiety,asalambastray,andMrs。
Miltonhavingeaten,continuedtoshowthefinestfeelingsonthematter。
Shesat,Imaymention,inthecushionedbasket—chair,theonlycomfortablechairintheroom,andwesatonincrediblyhard,horsehairthingshavingantimacassarstiedtotheirbacksbymeansoflemon—colouredbows。ItwasdifferentfromthosedearoldtalksatSurbiton,somehow。Shesatfacingthewindow,whichwasopen(thenightwassotranquilandwarm),andthedimlight—
—forwedidnotusethelamp——suitedheradmirably。Shetalkedinavoicethattoldyoushewastired,andsheseemedinclinedtostateacaseagainstherselfinthematterof\"ASoulUntrammelled。\"Itwassuchaneveningasmightliveinasympatheticmemoir,butitwasalittledullwhileitlasted。
\"Ifeel,\"shesaid,\"thatIamtoblame。IhaveDeveloped。Thatfirstbookofmine——Idonotgobackuponawordofit,mind,butithasbeenmisunderstood,misapplied。\"
\"Ithas,\"saidWidgery,tryingtolooksodeeplysympatheticastobevisibleinthedark。\"Deliberatelymisunderstood。\"
\"Don’tsaythat,\"saidthelady。\"Notdeliberately。Itryandthinkthatcriticsarehonest。Aftertheirlights。Iwasnotthinkingofcritics。Butshe——Imean——\"Shepaused,aninterrogation。
\"Itispossible,\"saidDangle,scrutinisinghissticking—plaster。
\"Iwriteabookandstateacase。IwantpeopletoTHINKasI
recommend,nottoDOasIrecommend。ItisjustTeaching。OnlyI
makeitintoastory。IwanttoTeachnewIdeas,newLessons,topromulgateIdeas。ThenwhentheIdeashavebeenspreadabroad——Thingswillcomeabout。Onlynowitismadnesstoflyinthefaceoftheestablishedorder。BernardShaw,youknow,hasexplainedthatwithregardtoSocialism。Weallknowthattoearnallyouconsumeisright,andthatlivingoninvestedcapitaliswrong。Onlywecannotbeginwhilewearesofew。ItisThoseOthers。\"
\"Precisely,\"saidWidgery。\"ItisThoseOthers。Theymustbeginfirst。\"
\"Andmeanwhileyougoonbanking——\"
\"IfIdidn’t,someoneelsewould。\"
\"AndIliveonMr。Milton’sLotionwhileItrytogainafootinginLiterature。\"
\"TRY!\"saidPhipps。\"YouHAVEdoneso。\"And,\"That’sdifferent,\"
saidDangle,atthesametime。
\"Youaresokindtome。Butinthismatter。OfcourseGeorginaGriffithsinmybooklivedaloneinaflatinParisandwenttolifeclassesandhadmenvisitors,butthenshewasovertwenty—one。\"
\"Jessicaisonlyseventeen,andgirlishforthat,\"saidDangle。
\"Italterseverything。Thatchild!Itisdifferentwithawoman。
AndGeorginaGriffithsneverflauntedherfreedom——onabicycle,incountryplaces。Inthiscountry。Whereeveryoneissoparticular。Fancy,SLEEPINGawayfromhome。It’sdreadful——Ifitgetsaboutitspellsruinforher。\"
\"Ruin,\"saidWidgery。
\"Nomanwouldmarryagirllikethat,\"saidPhipps。
\"Itmustbehushedup,\"saidDangle。
\"Italwaysseemstomethatlifeismadeupofindividuals,ofindividualcases。Wemustweigheachpersonagainsthisorhercircumstances。Generalrulesdon’tapply——\"
\"Ioftenfeeltheforceofthat,\"saidWidgery。\"Thosearemyrules。Ofcoursemybooks——\"
\"It’sdifferent,altogetherdifferent,\"saidDangle。\"Anoveldealswithtypicalcases。\"
\"Andlifeisnottypical,\"saidWidgery,withimmenseprofundity。
Thensuddenly,unintentionally,beinghimselfmostsurprisedandshockedofanyintheroom,Phippsyawned。Thefailingwasinfectious,andthegatheringhaving,asyoucaneasilyunderstand,talkeditselfweary,dispersedontrivialpretences。
Butnottosleepimmediately。DirectlyDanglewasalonehebegan,withinfinitedisgust,toscrutinisehisdarklingeye,forhewasaneat—mindedlittlemaninspiteofhisenergy。Thewholebusiness——sonearacapture——washorriblyvexatious。Phippssatonhisbedforsometimeexamining,withequaldisgust,acollarhewouldhavethoughtincredibleforSundaytwenty—fourhoursbefore。Mrs。Miltonfella—musingonthemortalityofevenbig,fatmenwithdog—likeeyes,andWidgerywasunhappybecausehehadbeensocrosstoheratthestation,andbecausesofarhedidnotfeelthathehadscoredoverDangle。AlsohewasangrywithDangle。Andallfourofthem,beingsoulslivingverymuchupontheappearancesofthings,hadapainful,mentalmiddledistanceofBotleyderisiveandsuspicious,andaremoterbackgroundofLondonhumorous,andSurbitonspeculative。Weretheyreally,afterall,behavingabsurdly?
MR。HOOPDRIVER,KNIGHTERRANT
XXXII
AsMr。Danglebadwitnessed,thefugitiveshadbeenleftbyhimbythesideoftheroadabouttwomilesfromBotley。BeforeMr。
Dangle’sappearance,Mr。Hoopdriverhadbeenlearningwithgreatinterestthatmereroadsideflowershadnames,——star—flowers,wind—stars,St。John’swort,willowherb,lordsandladies,bachelor’sbuttons,——mostcuriousnames,someofthem。\"TheflowersarealldifferentinSouthAfrica,y’know,\"hewasexplainingwithahappyflukeofhisimaginationtoaccountforhisignorance。Thensuddenly,heraldedbyclatteringsoundsandagrideofwheels,Danglehadflaredandthunderedacrossthetranquillityofthesummerevening;Dangle,swayingandgesticulatingbehindacorybanticblackhorse,hadhailedJessiebyhername,hadbackedtowardsthehedgefornoostensiblereason,andvanishedtotheaccomplishmentoftheFatethathadbeenwrittendownforhimfromtheverybeginningofthings。
JessieandHoopdriverhadscarcelytimetostandupandseizetheirmachines,beforethistumultuous,thisswiftandwonderfulpassingofDanglewasachieved。Hewentfromsidetosideoftheroad,——worseeventhantheridingforthofMr。Hoopdriveritwas,——andvanishedroundthecorner。
\"Heknewmyname,\"saidJessie。\"Yes——itwasMr。Dangle。\"
\"Thatwasourbicyclesdidthat,\"saidMr。Hoopdriversimultaneously,andspeakingwithacertaincomplacentconcern。
\"Ihopehewon’tgethurt。\"
\"ThatwasMr。Dangle,\"repeatedJessie,andMr。Hoopdriverheardthistime,withaviolentstart。Hiseyebrowswentupspasmodically。
\"What!someoneyouknow?\"
\"Yes。\"
\"Lord!\"
\"Hewaslookingforme,\"saidJessie。\"Icouldsee。Hebegantocalltomebeforethehorseshied。Mystepmotherhassenthim。\"
Mr。Hoopdriverwishedhehadreturnedthebicycleafterall,forhisideaswerestillalittlehazyaboutBechamelandMrs。
Milton。HonestyISthebestpolicy——often,hethought。Heturnedhisheadthiswayandthat。Hebecameactive。\"Afterus,eigh?
Thenhe’llcomeback。He’sgonedownthathill,andhewon’tbeabletopullupforabit,I’mcertain。\"
Jessie,hesaw,hadwheeledhermachineintotheroadandwasmounting。StillstaringatthecornerthathadswallowedupDangle,Hoopdriverfollowedsuit。Andso,justasthesunwassetting,theybegananotherflighttogether,——ridingnowtowardsBishopsWaltham,withMr。Hoopdriverinthepostofdanger——therear——everandagainlookingoverhisshoulderandswervingdangerouslyashedidso。OccasionallyJessiehadtoslackenherpace。Hebreathedheavily,andhatedhimselfbecausehismouthfellopen,Afternearlyanhour’shardriding,theyfoundthemselvesuncaughtatWinchester。NotatraceofDanglenoranyotherdangerwasvisibleastheyrodeintothedusky,yellow—litstreet。ThoughthebatshadbeenflutteringbehindthehedgesandtheeveningstarwasbrightwhiletheywerestilltwomilesfromWinchester,Mr。Hoopdriverpointedoutthedangersofstoppinginsuchanobviousabiding—place,andgentlybutfirmlyinsisteduponreplenishingthelampsandridingontowardsSalisbury。FromWinchester,roadsbranchineverydirection,andtoturnabruptlywestwardwasclearlythewaytothrowoffthechase。AsHoopdriversawthemoonrisingbroadandyellowthroughthetwilight,hethoughtheshouldrevivetheeffectofthatrideoutofBognor;butsomehow,albeitthemoonandalltheatmosphericeffectswerethesame,theemotionsweredifferent。Theyrodeinabsolutesilence,andslowlyaftertheyhadclearedtheoutskirtsofWinchester。Bothofthemwerenownearlytiredout,——thelevelwastedious,andevenalittlehillaburden;andsoitcameaboutthatinthehamletofWallenstocktheywerebeguiledtostopandaskforaccommodationinanexceptionallyprosperouslookingvillageinn。Aplausiblelandladyrosetotheoccasion。
Now,astheypassedintotheroomwheretheirsupperswereprepared,Mr。Hoopdrivercaughtaglimpsethroughadoorajarandfloatinginareekofsmoke,ofthreeandahalffaces——fortheedgeofthedoorcutonedown——andanAmericancloth—coveredtablewithseveralglassesandatankard。Andhealsoheardaremark。Inthesecondbeforeheheardthatremark,Mr。Hoopdriverhadbeenaproudandhappyman,toparticularize,abaronet’sheirincognito。Hehadsurrenderedtheirbicyclestotheoddmanoftheplacewithinfiniteeasydignity,andhadbowinglyopenedthedoorforJessie。\"Who’sthat,then?\"heimaginedpeoplesaying;andthen,\"Some’nprettywellorf——judgebythebicycles。\"Thentheimaginaryspectatorswouldfalla—talkingofthefashionablenessofbicycling,——howjudgesAndstockbrokersandactressesand,infact,allthebestpeoplerode,andhowthatitwasoftenthefancyofsuchgreatfolktoshunthebighotels,theadulationofurbancrowds,andseek,incognito,thecosyquaintnessesofvillagelife。Then,maybe,theywouldthinkofacertainnamelessairofdistinctionabouttheladywhohadsteppedacrossthedoorway,andaboutthehandsome,flaxen—moustached,blue—eyedCavalierwhohadfollowedherin,andtheywouldlookonetoanother。\"Tellyouwhatitis,\"oneofthevillageelderswouldsay——justastheydoinnovels——voicingthethoughtofall,inalow,impressivetone:\"There’ssuchathinasentertainingbarranetsunawares—nottomentionnohigherthings——\"
Such,Isay,hadbeenthefilmy,delightfulstuffinMr。
Hoopdriver’sheadthemomentbeforeheheardthatremark。Buttheremarktoppledhimheadlong。Whatthepreciseremarkwasneednotconcernus。ItwasacasualpieceofsuchsatireasStrephondelightsin。Shouldyoubecurious,dearlady,astoitsnature,youhavemerelytodressyourselfinareallymoderncyclingcostume,getoneofthefeeblest—lookingofyourmentoescortyou,andrideout,nextSaturdayevening,toanypublichousewherehealthy,homelypeoplegathertogether。ThenyouwillhearquitealotofthekindofthingMr。Hoopdriverheard。More,possibly,thanyouwilldesire。
Theremark,Imustadd,implicatedMr。Hoopdriver。Itindicatedanentiredisbeliefinhissocialstanding。Atablow,itshatteredallthegorgeousimaginativefabrichismindhadbeenrejoicingin。Allthatfoolishhappinessvanishedlikeadream。
Andtherewasnothingtoshowforit,asthereisnothingtoshowforanyspitefulremarkthathaseverbeenmade。Perhapsthemanwhosaidthethinghadagleamofsatisfactionattheideaoftakingacomplacent—lookingfooldownapeg,butitisjustaspossiblehedidnotknowatthetimethathisstrayshothadhit。
Hehadthrownitasaboythrowsastoneatabird。Anditnotonlydemolishedafoolish,happyconceit,butitwounded。IttouchedJessiegrossly。
Shedidnothearit,heconcludedfromhersubsequentbearing;
butduringthesuppertheyhadinthelittleprivatedining—room,thoughshetalkedcheerfully,hewaspreoccupied。Whiffsofindistinctconversation,andnowandthenlaughter,cameinfromtheinnparloiirthroughthepelargoniumsintheopenwindow。
Hoopdriverfeltitmustallbeinthesamestrain,——atherexpenseandhis。Heansweredherabstractedly。Shewastired,shesaid,andpresentlywenttoherroom。Mr。Hoopdriver,inhiscourtlyway,openedthedoorforherandbowedherout。Hestoodlisteningandfearingsomenewoffenceasshewentupstairs,androundthebendwherethebarometerhungbeneaththestuffedbirds。Thenhewentbacktotheroom,andstoodonthehearthrugbeforethe。paperfireplaceornament。\"Cads!\"hesaidinascathingundertone,asafreshburstoflaughtercamefloatingin。Allthroughsupperhehadbeencomposingstingingrepartee,ablisteringspeechofdenunciationtobepresentlydelivered。Hewouldratethemasanoblemanshould:\"CallthemselvesEnglishmen,indeed,andinsultawoman!\"hewouldsay;takethenamesandaddressesperhaps,threatentospeaktotheLordoftheManor,promisetoletthemhearfromhimagain,andsooutwithconsternationinhiswake。Itreallyoughttobedone。
\"Teach’embetter,\"hesaidfiercely,andtweakedhismoustachepainfully。Whatwasit?Herevivedtheobjectionableremarkforhisownexasperation,andthenwentovertheheadsofhisspeechagain。
Hecoughed,madethreestepstowardsthedoor,thenstoppedandwentbacktothehearthrug。Hewouldn’t——afterall。YetwashenotaKnightErrant?Shouldsuchmengounreproved,unchecked,bywanderingbaronetsincognito?Magnanimity?Lookatitinthatway?Churlsbeneathone’snotice?No;merelyacowardlysubterfuge。HeWOULDafterall。
Somethingwithinhimprotestedthathewasahot—headedassevenashewenttowardsthedooragain。Butheonlywentonthemoreresolutely。Hecrossedthehall,bythebar,andenteredtheroomfromwhichtheremarkhadproceeded。Heopenedthedoorabruptlyandstoodscowlingontheminthedoorway。\"You’llonlymakeamessofit,\"remarkedtheinternalsceptic。Therewerefivemenintheroomaltogether:afatperson,withalongpipeandagreatnumberofchins,inanarmchairbythefireplace,whowishedMr。Hoopdriveragoodeveningveryaffably;ayoungfellowsmokingacuttyanddisplayingcrossedlegswithgaiters;alittle,beardedmanwithatoothlesslaugh;amiddle—aged,comfortablemanwithbrighteyes,whoworeavelveteenjacket;
andafairyoungman,verygenteelinayellowish—brownready—madesuitandawhitetie。
\"H’m,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,lookingverysternandharsh。Andtheninaforbiddingtone,asonewhoconsentedtonoliberties,\"Goodevening。\"
\"Verypleasantdaywe’vebeen’aving,\"saidthefairyoungmanwiththewhitetie。
\"Very,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,slowly;andtakingabrownarmchair,heplanteditwithgreatdeliberationwherehefacedthefireplace,andsatdown。Let’ssee——howdidthatspeechbegin?
\"Verypleasantroadsabouthere,\"saidthefairyoungmanwiththewhitetie。
\"Very,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,eyeinghimdarkly。Havetobeginsomehow。\"Theroadsabouthereareallright,andtheweatherabouthereisallright,butwhatI’vecomeinheretosayis——there’ssomedamnedunpleasantpeople——damnedunpleasantpeople!\"
\"Oh!\"saidtheyoungmanwiththegaiters,apparentlymakingamentalinventoryofhispearlbuttonsashespoke。\"How’sthat?\"
Mr。Hoopdriverputhishandsonhiskneesandstuckouthiselbowswithextremeangularity。Inhishearthewasravingathisidioticfollyatthusbeardingtheselions,——indisputablytheyWERElions,——buthehadtogothroughwithitnow。Heavensend,hisbreath,whichwasalreadygettingatriflespasmodic,didnotsuddenlygiveout。Hefixedhiseyeonthefaceofthefatmanwiththechins,andspokeinalow,impressivevoice。\"Icamehere,sir,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,andpausedtoinflatehischeeks,\"withalady。\"
\"Verynicelady,\"saidthemanwiththegaiters,puttinghisheadononesidetoadmireapearlbuttonthathadbeenhidingbehindthecurvatureofhiscalf。\"Veryniceladyindeed。\"
\"Icamehere,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,\"withalady。\"
\"Wesawyoudid,blessyou,\"saidthefatmanwiththechins,inacuriouswheezyvoice。\"Idon’tseethere’sanythingsoveryextraordinaryinthat。One’udthinkwehadn’teyes。\"
Mr。Hoopdrivercoughed。\"Icame,here,sir——\"
\"We’ve’eardthat,\"saidthelittlemanwiththebeard,sharplyandwentoffintoanamiablechuckle。\"Weknowitby’art,\"saidthelittleman,elaboratingthepoint。
Mr。Hoopdrivertemporarilylosthisthread。Heglaredmalignantlyatthelittlemanwiththebeard,andtriedtorecoverhisdiscourse。Apause。
\"Youweresaying,\"saidthefairyoungmanwiththewhitetie,speakingverypolitely,\"thatyoucameherewithalady。\"
\"Alady,\"meditatedthegaitergazer。
Themaninvelveteen,whowaslookingfromonespeakertoanotherwithkeen,brighteyes,nowlaughedasthoughapointhadbeenscored,andstimulatedMr。Hoopdrivertospeak,byfixinghimwithanexpectantregard。
\"Somedirtycad,\"saidMr。Hoopdriver,proceedingwithhisdiscourse,andsuddenlygrowingextremelyfierce,\"madearemarkaswewentbythisdoor。\"
\"Steadyon!\"saidtheoldgentlemanwithmanychins。,Steadyon!
Don’tyougoa—callingusnames,please。\"
\"Oneminute!\"saidMr。Hoopdriver。\"Itwasn’tIbegancallingnames。\"(\"Whodid?saidthemanwiththechins。)\"I’mnotcallinganyofyoudirtycads。Don’trunawaywiththatimpression。Onlysomepersoninthisroommadearemarkthatshowedhewasn’tfittowipebootson,and,withallduedeferencetosuchgentlemenasAREgentlemen\"(Mr。Hoopdriverlookedroundformoralsupport),\"Iwanttoknowwhichitwas。\"
\"Meanin’?\"saidthefairyoungmaninthewhitetie。
\"ThatI’mgoingtowipemybootson’imstraightaway,\"saidMr。