第4章

Butifshebeblameless:

andif，contumaciousandresentful，sheharshlyrefusesto\"condone\"；if，withblindself-willandarrogance，shehastheindecenthardihoodtoresist，andcomplain。IfshewailandworryforJUSTICE，andtalkofthemotherwholoved——thefatherwhosheltered——thebrotherwhowillprotecther，——andinsistonbeing\"separated\"fromyouandyourmistress，——then，mypoorfriend，Ifearwemustdosomething；butwewilldoaslittleaspossible:wewillgiveher(what，inpointoffact，youhavealreadygivenher)，\"theWoman\'sDivorce\"；——leavetoremainALONE。Alone——marriedtoyourname。Nevertoknowtheprotectionofthisnominalhusband——northejoysoffamily——northeevery-daycompanionshipofarealhome。Nevertofeelorshowpreferenceforanyfriendnotofherownsex；thoughtempted，perhaps，byafeelingnoblerthanpassion；gratitudeforgenerouspity，thathaslightenedthePage58

drearydays。Tobeslandered，tormented，insulted；tofindtheworld，andtheworld\'slaw，astheLordChancellortrulyobserves，utterlyindifferenttoherwrongsorherhusband\'ssin；andthroughallthistoleadachaste，unspotted，patient，cheerfullife；withoutanger，withoutbitterness；andwithmeekrespectforthoseEnglishedictswhich，withaperverseparodyonScripture，pronouncethat\"itisnotgoodforMANtobealone，\"——butextremelygoodforwoman。Hardthatahusbandshouldnotdivorceanadulterouswife!Hardthatheshouldnotforma\"purerconnection!\"

Hard(thoughhehasacareerandoccupationoutofhisownhome)，thatasecondchanceofdomestichappinessshouldnotagaingreethim!——Butnottheleasthardthathisweakerpartner，elevated，accordingtoMrGladstone，toanequalitywithhim，sincetheChristianadvent，——she，whoifshehasnotahomehasnothing——shouldbeleftstrandedandwreckedonthebarrensands，atthefootoftheworld\'simpassiveandimpassablerocks。

\"Oh!sheoughttohavecondoned:

sheoughttohavebeenquiet:herfriendsoughttohavehusheditallup。\"——Perhaps。

Butthereisoneothercontingency:thereisthecontingencythatPage59

thewomanmaysay:\"WouldIhadbeenindeedasinneranddivorced，ratherthanlivethislifeoftorment，injustice，andmockery!\"Wildwords:terriblesinfulwords:aretheynot?Abad，shockingwomantosayso；nothingofthesaintandmartyrinhercomposition。ButalsoabadlawIthink。Abad，wickedlaw，whichmakesitutterlyindifferentwhethershecanorcannotclaimtobeaninnocentwoman:andwhetherherhusbandisorisnotabadworthlessman。

Eitherletmenrenouncetheprivilegeofdivorce，andtheassertionthatmarriageisadissolublecontract，——orallowtheweakerpartythatrefugefromintolerablewrong，whichtheyclaimasamatterofnecessityforthemselves。TheEcclesiasticallaw，whichdeniesthedissolubilityofmarriages，isintelligible，(thoughnotsointelligiblehow，thatbeingthecase，ecclesiasticsre-marrypersonsdivorcedbyparliament)。AndtheScotchlaw，whichreversestheecclesiasticallaw，andmakesmarriagedissolubleforbothsexesandallclasses，isintelligible。

ButtheLordChancellor\'sBill，whichdeniestothepoorwhatitgivestotherich——andgrantstothehusbandwhatitrefusestothewife——isnotintelligibleofanyprincipleofjustice。

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Indenyingwomentheequalclaim，whicheventheEcclesiasticalCourtsadmit，asfarastheyadmitanydivorce，LordCranworthassertshimselftobewiserthanLordEldon，——wiserthanLordThurlow，——andwiser(whichisverypossible)thanLordRosslyn；forthosethreedeceasedChancellors，ononeandthesameoccasion，agreedthattheprincipleonwhichsuchclaimoughttobeadmittedwassimplythis:wheretherewasanimpossibilityofreconciliation。

Itistruethattheparticularcaseonwhichthatdebatetookplace，wasacaseofincest。ItwasthefirstinstanceofadivorcebillpassedinEnglandonthepetitionofthewife；intheyear1801；inthecaseofMrAddison，whohadlivedwiththesisterofhiswife。ButthegeneralargumentwasnotlimitedtothatonecrimebyLordThurlow；andifithadbeen，whatnewconfusionistoarise，ifthebillnowpending，forMarriagewithaDeceasedWife\'sSister，shouldbecomelaw?IsLordCranworth\'sexceptionnolongertodeservethatdistinction?Orisittoremainincestifcombinedwithadultery；andceasetobeincestwhencombinedwithmarriage?Whatistobetherule?

LordThurlowdidnotattempttoclassify，(asLordCranworthhasdone，)whatshouldbeheldPage61

tobeunendurablewrong；hesaidmerely，thathehadbeenexcitedbythebilltoexaminethewholesubjectofdivorce，andthathewasoftheopiniontheremedywasnotconfinedtothehusband。Thattheprincipleshouldbe，——theimpossibilityofreconciliation。Hesaid，——\"Whydoyougranttothehusbandadivorcefortheadulteryofthewife?Becauseheoughtnottoforgive；andseparationisinevitable。Wherethewifecannotforgive，——andseparationisinevitablebyreasonofthecrimeofthehusband，——thewifeisentitledtothelikeremedy。Whyshouldshebecondemned，forHIScrime，tospendtherestofherdaysintheunheard-of-situation，ofbeingneithervirgin，wife，norwidow?\"

ThespeechofLordThurlowconvertedLordEldon；theprinciplewasadmittedbyall；andtheBillofDivorcewasgrantedtothecomplainingwife。

Itisimpossiblepreviouslytodefinealimitforunendurablewrong，thoughitbepossibletojudgeacasewhenheard。BytheScotchlaw，desertionisheldtobeasufficientcause；byseveralofthecountrieswhichfollowtheoldRomanlaw，causesofpersonaldisgustordislike；thismaybeerringonthecontraryside，andgivingtoogreatfacilityfordivorce；butonPage62

noprincipleofcommonsensecanitbefitthatthereshouldexistcasesofwronginwhichthelawcannotjudge，forthatsetsalimittothepossibilityofjustice。

Solongasahusbandisnotguiltyofincest，——awife，(accordingtoLordsCranworthandCampbell)，hasnothingtocomplainofwhichshemightnot\"condone。\"YetGodknowsitseemsdifficulttoimaginewhatshadeoftorment，insult，orinjury，couldbeaddedtowhathasbeenenduredinmyowncase。Ihavelearnedthelawrespectingwomen，piece-meal，bysufferingfromeveryoneofitsdefectsofprotection。Imarriedveryyoung，andmymarriagewasanunhappyone。Myfamilyinterferedearnestlyandfrequentlyinmybehalf:andasforme，Iforgaveandresented——resentedandforgave——tillatlengthI

leftmyhusband\'sformysister\'shouse。Hewrotethen，adjuringmetopardonhim；beseechingme，byallthatwasholy，\"nottocrushhim，\"but\"totrusttohim，\"toreturn!Hesaidhe\"knelttomeforpardon\"!

Hewrotetomyfamilyintheextremestandmostexaggeratedtermsofsubmission。

HesaidhewasgladPage63

theyhadavengedmeandscornedhim，andhevowedtotreatmekindlyforthefuture。Tomylastinginjury，——(evennowIwillnotwrite，tomylastingregret)，——I\"condoned。\"IknewIwasnotmyselffaultless；Iwasdeeplytouchedbyhisimploringphrases；andIreturnedtothehomeandthehusbandIhadabjured。Myfamily，however，didnotchoosetoresumetermsofintimacywithhim；andhequarrelledwithmeonthataccount。Iinsistedonmyrighttotakemychildrentomybrother\'shouse，thoughmybrotherwouldnotreceivehim。ThosechildrenwerekidnappedwhileIwaswithmysister，andsentbymyhusbandtoawomanwhohassincelefthimmoney，andofwhomheknewIhadtheworstopinion。

Atthattimethelawwas，(andIthankGodIbelieveIwasgreatlyinstrumentalinchangingthatlaw)，thatamanmighttakechildrenfromthemotheratanyage，andwithoutanyfaultoroffenceonherpart。Therehadbeenaninstanceinwhichthehusbandseizedandcarriedawayasucklinginfant，ashiswifesatenursingitinherownmother\'shouse。Another，inwhichthehusbandbeinghimselfinprisonfordebt，gavehiswife\'slegitimatechildtothewomanhecohabitedwith。Athird(inwhichthepartiesPage64

wereofhighrank)，wherethehusbanddesertedhiswife；claimedthebabebornafterhisdesertion(havingalreadyhisotherchildren)；

andlefthertolearnitsdeathfromthenewspapers!Afourth，inwhichthehusbandlivingwithamistress，andtravellingwithherunderhiswife\'sname，thelatterappealedforaseparationtotheEcclesiasticalCourt；

andtheadulteroushusband，torevengehimself，claimedfromherhisthreeinfantgirls。Inallthesecases，andinallothercases，theclaimofthefatherwasheldtobeindisputable。Therewasnolawthentohelpthemother，asthereisnolawnowtohelpthewife。Theblamelessnessofthemothersignifiednothinginthosedays，astheblamelessnessofthewifesignifiesnothinginthispresentday。Thefatherpossessedpreciselytherightthehusbandstillpossesses——namely，todoexactlywhathepleased。

MrNorton，then，tookmylittlechildren(agedtwo，four，andsixyears)；

andItracedthemtothehouseofthatvilewoman，whothreatenedtogiveme\"tothepolice\"whenIwentthereandclaimedthem。

Itwasnottillsixweeksafterthestealingofmychildren，——afteralong，angrycorrespondence——andafterhavingattemptedtoconditionthat\"ifmyfamilywouldretractallthathadbeensaidPage65

againsthim，hewouldretractallhehadsaidagainstme\"——thatMrNortontookhighergroundthanhisrealcauseofanger，——andappearedbeforetheworldinthecharacterof\"aninjuredhusband。\"HebroughtanactionagainstLordMelbourne；whowasinnowayconnectedwithourquarrel；

whohadbeenamostkindfriendtous；andwithwhom，thelasttimeIhadeverseenhiminmyhome，——myhusbandwasonthebestpossibleterms，endeavouringtoprocurefromhimaloanofmoney!Theinfamousopportunityaffordedtounscrupulousmen，intheEnglish\"ActionforDamages\"(whichLordStLeonard\'shaslatelytermeda\"disgracetothecountry\"——\"astigmaonthelawofEngland，\"——\"anactionwhichshocksone\'ssenseofwhatisright\")

wassuggestedasatemptationandabait。LordMelbournedeclaredthat，sofarasMrNortonwasconcerned，hebelievedtheactiontobebroughtentirelyasameansofobtainingmoney。And，astothepersonswhowereknowntohaveinstigatedtheproceedings，heconsidereditwasapoliticalplotonthepartofasmallsectionoftheTories，toruinhimasPrimeMinister。AndIknowthatinthisopinionyourMajesty\'sUncle，KingWilliamIV。，entirelyconcurred。

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LordMelbourneneverforamomentsupposedMrNortonwasreallyjealousofhim；butscornfullywrotetomethus，——ofmyhusband，——\"YououghttoknowhimbetterthanIdo，andmustdoso。ButyouseemtometobehardlyawarewhataGNOMEheis。Inmyopinionhehassomehoworothermadethiswholemattersubservienttohispecuniaryinterest。\"

IdonotknowwhatpecuniaryadvantageconsentingtobringthelosttrialobtainedforMrNorton:thoughifhehadwonit，certainlythe\"damages\"wouldhavebeenexcessive；LordMelbournebeingrepresentedbyMrNorton\'scounsel，asaprofligateoldgrandee，whohadcomeintothishappyhome，toseducetheyouthfulandbelovedmotherofMrNorton\'sthreeinfantchildren。Idonotknow，Isay，whatbasebargainmayhavebeenmadeaboutit，asLordMelbourneconjecturedtherewas；butthisIbelieve，thatbutfortheschemetooustLordMelbourneasaMinister，andthefeasibilityofanactionfor\"damages，\"thisquarrelwithmyhusbandmighthavebeenarranged——asotherdisputeshadbeen，equallybitter。

Atthetrial，itwasprovedthatthewitnessesforthe\"injuredhusband\"hadreceivedmoney，Page67

andhadactuallyresidedtillthetimeofthetrialatthecountry-seatofLordGrantley，MrNorton\'selderbrother。Thejurylistenedwithincredulityanddisgusttotheevidence；andwithoutrequiringtohearasinglewitnessforLordMelbourne，orleavingthejury-box，theyinstantlygavetheirverdictagainstMrNorton:averdictwhichwasreceivedwithcheerswhichthejudgecouldnotsuppress:sovehementwastheexpressionofpubliccontemptandindignation。

MrDavidLeahythusdescribedthefeelingofthetime:——\"Alltheworld——whatevertheirpoliticsmaybe，orwhatevertheiropinionsaboutthediscretionofthebehaviourofalloreitherofthethreeprincipalparties——mustacknowledgethatthethreeprincipalwitnesseswereperjuredandsuborned。Ihavespokenwithalmosteverypersonpresent，andthereexistsaperfectunanimityuponthispoint。\"

Afterthetrialwasover，MrNortonnotifiedtomethatmyfamilymightsupportme，orthatImightwriteformybread；andthatmychildrenwerebylawathissoledisposal。

Andhere，again，MONEYwashisavowedmotive；forhefirstaffirmedthattheresidenceoftheseinfantswithmemightmakehimliableforthedebtsofmyhousehold；andthen，thatPage68

\"others\"onwhomhehimselfdepended，wouldnotpermithimtosendbackhischildren，asitwouldappeartojustifyme，andsoprovethetrialamockery。

Hisowncounsel，SirJohnBayley，gavethisaccountinapublishedletterlastyear:——\"IfoundMrsNortonanxiousonlyononepoint，andnearlybroken-heartedaboutit；namely，therestorationofherchildren。Shetreatedherpecuniaryaffairsasamatterofperfectindifference，andleftmetoarrangethemwithMrNortonasIthoughtfit。Ifoundherhusband，onthecontrary，anxiousONLYaboutthepecuniaryarrangement，andsoobviouslymakingtheloveofthemotherforheroffspringameansofbarterandbargain，thatIwrotetohimIcouldbe\'nopartytoanyarrangementwhichmadeMoneythepriceofMrsNorton\'sfairandhonourableaccesstoherchildren。\'Ifoundthetakingawayofthosechildrenhadbeentherealgroundofquarrel，andthatnotonlyMrNortonthrewtheblameofthesubsequenttrialonhisadvisors，anddeclaredthatthetrialwasbrought\'againsthisjudgment，\'

butthatoneofhisangriestgroundsofcomplaintagainsthiswifewas，thatshehadsaidshe\'neverwouldreturntohim；\'……Ifound，underMrNorton\'sownhandwriting，Page69

confessionsofthegrossestpersonalviolencetowardshiswife……

MrNortonadmittedtomehisfirmbeliefofhiswife\'sinnocenceofthechargehehadbroughtagainstherandLordMelbourne……Iconsiderthereneverwasamoredeeply-injuredwoman，andthathisconducttohercertainlyhadbeenmarkedby\'thegrossestcruelty，injustice，andinconsistency，\'

thateveranymandisplayed。\"

Oneofmychildrenwasafterwardskilled，forwantofthecommonestcareamotherwouldhavegiventoherhousehold。MrNortonallowedthischildtolieillaweekbeforehesenttotellmehewasdying；and，whenIarrived，Ifoundthepoorlittlecreaturealreadyinhiscoffin。

Whenitwasnotacaseofdeath，Iwasnotallowedtohearatall。Once，whentheywereill，Iwrotetoasknewsofthem；andmyownletterwasrefoldedandsentbacktome。

Thathusband，whosepetitionforpardonhadtouchedmesoeasily，neverpitiedme。WhatIsufferedrespectingthosechildren，Godknows，andHeonly:whatIendured，andyetlivedpast，——ofpain，exasperation，helplessness，anddespair，undertheevillawwhichsufferedanyman，forvengeanceorforinterest，totakebabychildrenfromthemother，Ishallnoteventrytoexplain。Page70

Ibelievemenhavenomorenotionofwhatthatanguishis，thantheblindhaveofcolours；andIblessGodthatatleastminewasoneofthecaseswhichcalledattentiontothestateofthelawasitthenexisted。

AftertheactionagainstLordMelbourne(inwhich，accordingtothepreposterousEnglishcode，I

couldhavenopersonaldefence，noranymeansofshowinghowIhadbeentreatedasawife):IconsultedcounselwhetherIcouldnotnowdivorcemyhusband:whetheradivorce\"byreasonofcruelty\"mightnotbepleadedforme；andIlaidbeforemylawyersthemanyinstancesofviolence，injustice，andill-usage，ofwhichthetrialwasbutthecrowningexample。IwasthentoldthatnodivorceIcouldobtainwouldbreakmymarriage；thatIcouldnotpleadcrueltywhichIhadforgiven；

thatbyreturningtoMr。NortonIhad\"condoned\"allIcomplainedof。IwasanENGLISHWIFE，andformetherewasnopossibilityofredress。Theanswerwasalwaysthesame。TheLAW\"HaveInoremedy?\"——\"NoremedyinLAW。TheLAWcandonothingforyou:yourcaseisoneofsingular，ofincrediblehardship；butthereisnopossiblewayinwhichtheLAWcouldassistyou。\"ItriedtheEdinburghlawyers。

Iin-Page71

quirediftheycouldnotprovemymarriageaScotchone，allMrNorton\'spropertybeinginScotland，hisfatheraScotchBaronofExchequer，andhismotherofaScotchfamily，——butwithoutsuccess。

Whenthewomandied，towhommychildrenhadbeensent，MrNortonproposedtometo\"forgive\"thepublictrial，andreturntohim(showinghowmuchhehadbelieveditsaccusations。)Ireceivedfromhimamostextraordinarynote，sayingthatheconsideredourdifferences\"capableofadjustment，\"andhopedIwouldmeethimalone，inanemptyhouse，No。1，Berkeley-street，wherehewouldwaitforme。Ireceivedthiscommunicationwithdoubtanddistrust。

Themeasuresadoptedtowardsme，intheefforttogetridofme，hadbeensostrange，thatIwasafraidtomeetmyhusband\"alone，inanemptyhouse。\"ButIagreed，onhispetition，tocometohisownhouse。Hethenbesoughtmeoncemore\"toforgetthepast\"andreturnhome。Helaidtheblameofallthathadhappened，onhisfriendsandadvisers；saidthetrialwasagainsthiswillandjudgment，andthathelonged\"totakemetohisheartagain。\"Hesentnotesalmostdailytomyhouse。Thoselettersbegan，\"MyCarry，\"\"MydearCarry，\"Page72

andweresigned\"Yoursaffectionately。\"Twoofthem(inallusiontomyfearofmeetinghim)boretheplayfulsignatureof\"GREENACRE，\"——thenameofamanwhohadbeenrecentlyhung，forenticingawomantohishousebypromisingmarriage，andthenmurderingandcuttingherintopieces。

Thisplannedreconciliationdidnottakeplace。MrNorton\'ssisterinformedhimthatIdidnotintend\"honestly\"toreturntohim。ThatisthatIdidnotintendtoremaininmyhome。ThatIwouldgobackforatriumph；formyreputationandmychildren；butnottostay。Renewedbitterdisputestookplace，andmychildrenweredeliveredovertohissister。

ItcostMrNortonnothing，toreverttothehypocriticalpretencehehadadoptedintheactionofdamages。He，whohadjustwrittenthosecoaxingletterssignedGreenacre，——whohadjustbeggedhiswifeto\"meethiminanemptyhouse，\"andtrytoarrangesoastooutwitthosewhohadbeenhis\"advisers，\"——leapednimblyupagaintothepedestalfromwhichhehaddescended，andresumedtheattitudeofan\"injuredhusband。\"Actually，thenextstepaftertheGREENACREletters，wastoadvertisemeintheEnglishnewspapers；MrNortonbeing，IPage73

believe，theonlymanofhisownrankinlifewhoeverresortedtothatmeasure。

WhenIsawthiswonderfulinsultgazettedbythehusbandwhohadjustbeenwooingmyreturn:——\"Whereason30thMarch，1830，mywife，CarolineElizabethSarah，leftme，herfamily，andhome，andhathfromthenceforthcontinuedtoliveseparateandapartfromme，\"&；c。，——IagaininquiredifIhad\"noremedy?\"None。Onlymybrother\'ssolicitorsweredirectedtopublishacounteradvertisement，declaringthewholeofwhatMrNortonhadstatedwasfalse。

Afterwards，SirJohnBayley(MrNorton\'sowncounsel)submittedhisletterstoLordWynford(whohadbeenMrNorton\'sguardian)。LordWynfordexpressedhimselfinthestrongestandmostcontemptuoustermswithrespecttohisformerward；andfinally——fortheexpresspurposeofbeingshowntoMrNorton——hewrotethefollowingnote(theoriginalofwhichisinmypossession)——

\"MyDearBayley，\"Ihavebeenthinkingofthecorrespondenceyoureadtomethismorning。IamconvincedthatGeorgeNortoncanhavenodefencePage74

totheactions，andthathisdefendingthemwillbeattendedWITH

LOSSOFCHARACTER，aswellasgreatexpense。Heshouldagreetothearrangementthatyoupropose，oranyotherthatcanbemade。IwillwritetoGrantleytotellhimthatIhaveadvisedasettlementonANYterms。\"

\"Faithfullyyours，\"WYNFORD。\"

MrNortonhadgivenhispledgedwordinwriting，tohiscounselandreferee，toabidebyanydecisionhemightcometo。Hebrokehisword，refusedtoabidebyhiswrittenpledge，andactuallyhadtheeffronterytocomplainofhisletters\"havingbeenshewn\"!TowhichSirJohnBayleybluntlyreplied，thatifhewasdoingwhatwasrightandhonestbyme，\"itwasastonishingheshouldsodreaditsbeingknown。\"

Atlength，afterIhadremainedfortwoyearswithoutafarthingofsupportfrommyhusband；dependentonmyfamily；oneofmycreditorsbroughtanactionagainstMrNorton；

whooncemoreundertook——(beingtheaggressor)——topretendtobetheaggrieved。

OncemoreI，also，struggledtoprove，undertheblessedEnglishlaw，whatweretherealfactsofthecase。MyPage75

husbandhimselfhaspublished，thereasonofmynon-success。HereareMrNorton\'sprintedwords:——\"LordAbinger，whotriedthecause，uponasuggestionofmycounsel\"(SirFitzroyKelly)，\"thatSirJohnBayleyhadbeenmyadvocateandreferee，REFUSEDTOHEARHISEVIDENCE。\"