`IfTHATdoesn’t\"drumthemoutoftown，\"’shethoughttoherself，’nothingeverwill!’
CHAPTERVIII
`It’smyownInvention’
Afterawhilethenoiseseemedgraduallytodieaway，tillallwasdeadsilence，andAliceliftedupherheadinsomealarm。
Therewasnoonetobeseen，andherfirstthoughtwasthatshemusthavebeendreamingabouttheLionandtheUnicornandthosestilllyingatherfeet，onwhichshehadtriedtocuttheplum—
cake，`SoIwasn’tdreaming，afterall，’shesaidtoherself，`unless——unlesswe’reallpartofthesamedream。OnlyIdohopeit’sMYdream，andnottheRedKing’s!Idon’tlikebelongingtoanotherperson’sdream，’shewentoninarathercomplainingtone：`I’veagreatmindtogoandwakehim，andseewhathappens!’
Atthismomentherthoughtswereinterruptedbyaloudshoutingof`Ahoy!Ahoy!Check!’andaKnightdressedincrimsonarmourcamegallopingdownuponher，brandishingagreatclub。Justashereachedher，thehorsestoppedsuddenly：`You’remyprisoner!’theKnightcried，ashetumbledoffhishorse。
Startledasshewas，Alicewasmorefrightenedforhimthanforherselfatthemoment，andwatchedhimwithsomeanxietyashemountedagain。Assoonashewascomfortablyinthesaddle，hebeganoncemore`You’remy——’buthereanothervoicebrokein`Ahoy!Ahoy!Check!’andAlicelookedroundinsomesurpriseforthenewenemy。
ThistimeitwasaWhiteKnight。HedrewupatAlice’sside，andtumbledoffhishorsejustastheRedKnighthaddone：thenhegotonagain，andthetwoKnightssatandlookedateachotherforsometimewithoutspeaking。Alicelookedfromonetotheotherinsomebewilderment。
`She’sMYprisoner，youknow!’theRedKnightsaidatlast。
`Yes，butthen_I_cameandrescuedher!’theWhiteKnightreplied。
`Well，wemustfightforher，then，’saidtheRedKnight，ashetookuphishelmet（whichhungfromthesaddle，andwassomethingtheshapeofahorse’shead），andputiton。
`YouwillobservetheRulesofBattle，ofcourse？’theWhiteKnightremarked，puttingonhishelmettoo。
`Ialwaysdo，’saidtheRedKnight，andtheybeganbangingawayateachotherwithsuchfurythatAlicegotbehindatreetobeoutofthewayoftheblows。
`Iwonder，now，whattheRulesofBattleare，’shesaidtoherself，asshewatchedthefight，timidlypeepingoutfromherhiding—place：`oneRuleseemstobe，thatifoneKnighthitstheother，heknockshimoffhishorse，andifhemisses，hetumblesoffhimself——andanotherRuleseemstobethattheyholdtheirclubswiththeirarms，asiftheywerePunchandJudy——Whatanoisetheymakewhentheytumble!Justlikeawholesetoffire—
ironsfallingintothefender!Andhowquietthehorsesare!
Theyletthemgetonandoffthemjustasiftheyweretables!’
AnotherRuleofBattle，thatAlicehadnotnoticed，seemedtobethattheyalwaysfellontheirheads，andthebattleendedwiththeirbothfallingoffinthisway，sidebyside：whentheygotupagain，theyshookhands，andthentheRedKnightmountedandgallopedoff。
`Itwasagloriousvictory，wasn’tit？’saidtheWhiteKnight，ashecameuppanting。
`Idon’tknow，’Alicesaiddoubtfully。`Idon’twanttobeanybody’sprisoner。IwanttobeaQueen。’
`Soyouwill，whenyou’vecrossedthenextbrook，’saidtheWhiteKnight。`I’llseeyousafetotheendofthewood——andthenImustgoback，youknow。That’stheendofmymove。’
`Thankyouverymuch，’saidAlice。`MayIhelpyouoffwithyourhelmet？’Itwasevidentlymorethanhecouldmanagebyhimself；however，shemanagedtoshakehimoutofitatlast。
`Nowonecanbreathemoreeasily，’saidtheKnight，puttingbackhisshaggyhairwithbothhands，andturninghisgentlefaceandlargemildeyestoAlice。Shethoughtshehadneverseensuchastrange—lookingsoldierinallherlife。
Hewasdressedintinarmour，whichseemedtofithimverybadly，andhehadaqueer—shapedlittledealboxfastenedacrosshisshoulder，upside—down，andwiththelidhangingopen。Alicelookedatitwithgreatcuriosity。
`Iseeyou’readmiringmylittlebox。’theKnightsaidinafriendlytone。`It’smyowninvention——tokeepclothesandsandwichesin。YouseeIcarryitupside—down，sothattheraincan’tgetin。’
`ButthethingscangetOUT，’Alicegentlyremarked。`Doyouknowthelid’sopen？’
`Ididn’tknowit，’theKnightsaid，ashadeofvexationpassingoverhisface。`Thenallthethingsmuchhavefallenout!Andtheboxisnousewithoutthem。’Heunfasteneditashespoke，andwasjustgoingtothrowitintothebushes，whenasuddenthoughtseemedtostrikehim，andhehungitcarefullyonatree。`CanyouguesswhyIdidthat？’hesaidtoAlice。
Aliceshookherhead。
`Inhopessomebeesmaymakeanestinit——thenIshouldgetthehoney。’
`Butyou’vegotabee—hive——orsomethinglikeone——fastenedtothesaddle，’saidAlice。
`Yes，it’saverygoodbee—hive，’theKnightsaidinadiscontentedtone，`oneofthebestkind。Butnotasinglebeehascomenearityet。Andtheotherthingisamouse—trap。I
supposethemicekeepthebeesout——orthebeeskeepthemiceout，Idon’tknowwhich。’
`Iwaswonderingwhatthemouse—trapwasfor，’saidAlice。`Itisn’tverylikelytherewouldbeanymiceonthehorse’sback。’
`Notverylikely，perhaps，’saidtheKnight：`butiftheyDO
come，Idon’tchoosetohavethemrunningallabout。’
`Yousee，’hewentonafterapause，`it’saswelltobeprovidedforEVERYTHING。That’sthereasonthehorsehasallthoseankletsroundhisfeet。’
`Butwhataretheyfor？’Aliceaskedinatoneofgreatcuriosity。
`Toguardagainstthebitesofsharks，’theKnightreplied。
`It’saninventionofmyown。Andnowhelpmeon。I’llgowithyoutotheendofthewood——What’sthedishfor？’
`It’smeantforplum—cake，’saidAlice。
`We’dbettertakeitwithus，’theKnightsaid。`It’llcomeinhandyifwefindanyplum—cake。Helpmetogetitintothisbag。’
Thistookaverylongtimetomanage，thoughAliceheldthebagopenverycarefully，becausetheKnightwassoVERYawkwardinputtinginthedish：thefirsttwoorthreetimesthathetriedhefellinhimselfinstead。`It’sratheratightfit，yousee，’hesaid，astheygotitinalast；`Therearesomanycandlesticksinthebag。’Andhehungittothesaddle，whichwasalreadyloadedwithbunchesofcarrots，andfire—irons，andmanyotherthings。
`Ihopeyou’vegotyourhairwellfastenedon？’hecontinued，astheysetoff。
`Onlyintheusualway，’Alicesaid，smiling。
`That’shardlyenough，’hesaid，anxiously。`YouseethewindissoVERYstronghere。It’sasstrongassoup。’
`Haveyouinventedaplanforkeepingthehairfrombeingblownoff？’Aliceenquired。
`Notyet，’saidtheKnight。`ButI’vegotaplanforkeepingitfromFALLINGoff。’
`Ishouldliketohearit，verymuch。’
`Firstyoutakeanuprightstick，’saidtheKnight。`Thenyoumakeyourhaircreepupit，likeafruit—tree。NowthereasonhairfallsoffisbecauseithangsDOWN——thingsneverfallUPWARDS，youknow。It’saplanofmyowninvention。Youmaytryitifyoulike。’
Itdidn’tsoundacomfortableplan，Alicethought，andforafewminutesshewalkedoninsilence，puzzlingovertheidea，andeverynowandthenstoppingtohelpthepoorKnight，whocertainlywasNOTagoodrider。
Wheneverthehorsestopped（whichitdidveryoften），hefelloffinfront；andwheneveritwentonagain（whichitgenerallydidrathersuddenly），hefelloffbehind。Otherwisehekeptonprettywell，exceptthathehadahabitofnowandthenfallingoffsideways；andashegenerallydidthisonthesideonwhichAlicewaswalking，shesoonfoundthatitwasthebestplannottowalkQUITEclosetothehorse。
`I’mafraidyou’venothadmuchpracticeinriding，’sheventuredtosay，asshewashelpinghimupfromhisfifthtumble。
TheKnightlookedverymuchsurprised，andalittleoffendedattheremark。`Whatmakesyousaythat？’heasked，ashescrambledbackintothesaddle，keepingholdofAlice’shairwithonehand，tosavehimselffromfallingoverontheotherside。
`Becausepeopledon’tfalloffquitesooften，whenthey’vehadmuchpractice。’
`I’vehadplentyofpractice，’theKnightsaidverygravely：
`plentyofpractice!’
Alicecouldthinkofnothingbettertosaythan`Indeed？’butshesaiditasheartilyasshecould。Theywentonalittlewayinsilenceafterthis，theKnightwithhiseyesshut，mutteringtohimself，andAlicewatchinganxiouslyforthenexttumble。
`Thegreatartofriding，’theKnightsuddenlybeganinaloudvoice，wavinghisrightarmashespoke，`istokeep——’Herethesentenceendedassuddenlyasithadbegun，astheKnightfellheavilyonthetopofhisheadexactlyinthepathwhereAlicewaswalking。Shewasquitefrightenedthistime，andsaidinananxioustone，asshepickedhimup，`Ihopenobonesarebroken？’
`Nonetospeakof，’theKnightsaid，asifhedidn’tmindbreakingtwoorthreeofthem。`Thegreatartofriding，asIwassaying，is——tokeepyourbalanceproperly。Likethis，youknow——’
Heletgothebridle，andstretchedoutbothhisarmstoshowAlicewhathemeant，andthistimehefellflatonhisback，rightunderthehorse’sfeet。
`Plentyofpractice!’hewentonrepeating，allthetimethatAlicewasgettinghimonhisfeetagain。`Plentyofpractice!’
`It’stooridiculous!’criedAlice，losingallherpatiencethistime。
`Yououghttohaveawoodenhorseonwheels，thatyouought!’
`Doesthatkindgosmoothly？’theKnightaskedinatoneofgreatinterest，claspinghisarmsroundthehorse’sneckashespoke，justintimetosavehimselffromtumblingoffagain。
`Muchmoresmoothlythanalivehorse，’Alicesaid，withalittlescreamoflaughter，inspiteofallshecoulddotopreventit。
`I’llgetone，’theKnightsaidthoughtfullytohimself。`Oneortwo——several。’
Therewasashortsilenceafterthis，andthentheKnightwentonagain。`I’magreathandatinventingthings。Now，Idaresayyounoticed，thatlasttimeyoupickedmeup，thatIwaslookingratherthoughtful？’
`YouWEREalittlegrave，’saidAlice。
`Well，justthenIwasinventinganewwayofgettingoveragate——wouldyouliketohearit？’
`Verymuchindeed，’Alicesaidpolitely。
`I’lltellyouhowIcametothinkofit，’saidtheKnight。
`Yousee，Isaidtomyself，\"Theonlydifficultyiswiththefeet：theHEADishighenoughalready。\"Now，firstIputmyheadonthetopofthegate——thenIstandonmyhead——thenthefeetarehighenough，yousee——thenI’mover，yousee。’
`Yes，Isupposeyou’dbeoverwhenthatwasdone，’Alicesaidthoughtfully：`butdon’tyouthinkitwouldberatherhard？’
`Ihaven’ttriedityet，’theKnightsaid，gravely：`soIcan’ttellforcertain——butI’mafraiditWOULDbealittlehard。’
Helookedsovexedattheidea，thatAlicechangedthesubjecthastily。`Whatacurioushelmetyou’vegot!’shesaidcheerfully。
`Isthatyourinventiontoo？’
TheKnightlookeddownproudlyathishelmet，whichhungfromthesaddle。`Yes，’hesaid，`butI’veinventedabetteronethanthat——likeasugarloaf。WhenIusedtowearit，ifIfelloffthehorse，italwaystouchedthegrounddirectly。SoIhadaVERYlittlewaytofall，yousee——ButthereWASthedangeroffallingINTOit，tobesure。Thathappenedtomeonce——andtheworstofitwas，beforeIcouldgetoutagain，theotherWhiteKnightcameandputiton。Hethoughtitwashisownhelmet。’
TheknightlookedsosolemnaboutitthatAlicedidnotdaretolaugh。`I’mafraidyoumusthavehurthim，’shesaidinatremblingvoice，`beingonthetopofhishead。’
`Ihadtokickhim，ofcourse，’theKnightsaid，veryseriously。
`Andthenhetookthehelmetoffagain——butittookhoursandhourstogetmeout。Iwasasfastas——aslightning，youknow。’
`Butthat’sadifferentkindoffastness，’Aliceobjected。
TheKnightshookhishead。`Itwasallkindsoffastnesswithme，Icanassureyou!’hesaid。Heraisedhishandsinsomeexcitementashesaidthis，andinstantlyrolledoutofthesaddle，andfellheadlongintoadeepditch。
Alicerantothesideoftheditchtolookforhim。Shewasratherstartledbythefall，asforsometimehehadkeptonverywell，andshewasafraidthathereallyWAShurtthistime。
However，thoughshecouldseenothingbutthesolesofhisfeet，shewasmuchrelievedtohearthathewastalkingoninhisusualtone。`Allkindsoffastness，’herepeated：`butitwascarelessofhimtoputanotherman’shelmeton——withthemaninit，too。’
`HowCANyougoontalkingsoquietly，headdownwards？’Aliceasked，asshedraggedhimoutbythefeet，andlaidhiminaheaponthebank。
TheKnightlookedsurprisedatthequestion。`Whatdoesitmatterwheremybodyhappenstobe？’hesaid。`Mymindgoesonworkingallthesame。Infact，themoreheaddownwardsIam，themoreIkeepinventingnewthings。’
`NowthecleverestthingofthesortthatIeverdid，’hewentonafterapause，`wasinventinganewpuddingduringthemeat—
course。’
`Intimetohaveitcookedforthenextcourse？’saidAlice。
`Well，nottheNEXTcourse，’theKnightsaidinaslowthoughtfultone：`no，certainlynotthenextCOURSE。’
`Thenitwouldhavetobethenextday。Isupposeyouwouldn’thavetwopudding—coursesinonedinner？’
`Well，nottheNEXTday，’theKnightrepeatedasbefore：`notthenextDAY。Infact，’hewenton，holdinghisheaddown，andhisvoicegettinglowerandlower，`Idon’tbelievethatpuddingeverWAScooked!Infact，Idon’tbelievethatpuddingeverWILL
becooked!Andyetitwasaverycleverpuddingtoinvent。’
`Whatdidyoumeanittobemadeof？’Aliceasked，hopingtocheerhimup，forthepoorKnightseemedquitelow—spiritedaboutit。
`Itbeganwithblottingpaper，’theKnightansweredwithagroan。
`Thatwouldn’tbeverynice，I’mafraid——’
`NotveryniceALONE，’heinterrupted，quiteeagerly：`butyou’venoideawhatadifferenceitmakesmixingitwithotherthings——suchasgunpowderandsealing—wax。AndhereImustleaveyou。’Theyhadjustcometotheendofthewood。
Alicecouldonlylookpuzzled：shewasthinkingofthepudding。
`Youaresad，’theKnightsaidinananxioustone：`letmesingyouasongtocomfortyou。’
`Isitverylong？’Aliceasked，forshehadheardagooddealofpoetrythatday。
`It’slong，’saidtheKnight，`butvery，VERYbeautiful。
Everybodythathearsmesingit——eitheritbringstheTEARS
intotheireyes，orelse——’
`Orelsewhat？’saidAlice，fortheKnighthadmadeasuddenpause。
`Orelseitdoesn’t，youknow。Thenameofthesongiscalled\"HADDOCKS’EYES。\"’
`Oh，that’sthenameofthesong，isit？’Alicesaid，tryingtofeelinterested。
`No，youdon’tunderstand，’theKnightsaid，lookingalittlevexed。`That’swhatthenameisCALLED。ThenamereallyIS\"THE
AGEDAGEDMAN。\"’
`ThenIoughttohavesaid\"That’swhattheSONGiscalled\"？’
Alicecorrectedherself。
`No，yououghtn’t：that’squiteanotherthing!TheSONGiscalled\"WAYSANDMEANS\"：butthat’sonlywhatit’sCALLED，youknow!’
`Well，whatISthesong，then？’saidAlice，whowasbythistimecompletelybewildered。
`Iwascomingtothat，’theKnightsaid。`ThesongreallyIS
\"A—SITTINGONAGATE\"：andthetune’smyowninvention。’
Sosaying，hestoppedhishorseandletthereinsfallonitsneck：then，slowlybeatingtimewithonehand，andwithafaintsmilelightinguphisgentlefoolishface，asifheenjoyedthemusicofhissong，hebegan。
OfallthestrangethingsthatAlicesawinherjourneyThroughTheLooking—Glass，thiswastheonethatshealwaysrememberedmostclearly。Yearsafterwardsshecouldbringthewholescenebackagain，asifithadbeenonlyyesterday——themildblueeyesandkindlysmileoftheKnight——thesettingsungleamingthroughhishair，andshiningonhisarmourinablazeoflightthatquitedazzledher——thehorsequietlymovingabout，withthereinshanginglooseonhisneck，croppingthegrassatherfeet——andtheblackshadowsoftheforestbehind——allthisshetookinlikeapicture，as，withonehandshadinghereyes，sheleantagainstatree，watchingthestrangepair，andlistening，inahalfdream，tothemelancholymusicofthesong。
`ButthetuneISN’Thisowninvention，’shesaidtoherself：
`it’s\"IGIVETHEEALL，ICANNOMORE。\"’Shestoodandlistenedveryattentively，butnotearscameintohereyes。
`I’lltelltheeeverythingIcan；
There’slittletorelate。
Isawanagedagedman，A—sittingonagate。
\"Whoareyou，agedman？\"Isaid，\"andhowisityoulive？\"
AndhisanswertrickledthroughmyheadLikewaterthroughasieve。
Hesaid\"IlookforbutterfliesThatsleepamongthewheat：
Imakethemintomutton—pies，Andselltheminthestreet。
Isellthemuntomen，\"hesaid，\"Whosailonstormyseas；
Andthat’sthewayIgetmybread——
Atrifle，ifyouplease。\"
ButIwasthinkingofaplanTodyeone’swhiskersgreen，AndalwaysusesolargeafanThattheycouldnotbeseen。
So，havingnoreplytogiveTowhattheoldmansaid，Icried，\"Come，tellmehowyoulive!\"
Andthumpedhimonthehead。
Hisaccentsmildtookupthetale：
Hesaid\"Igomyways，AndwhenIfindamountain—rill，Isetitinablaze；
AndthencetheymakeastufftheycallRolands’MacassarOil——
Yettwopence—halfpennyisallTheygivemeformytoil。\"
ButIwasthinkingofawayTofeedoneselfonbatter，AndsogoonfromdaytodayGettingalittlefatter。
Ishookhimwellfromsidetoside，Untilhisfacewasblue：
\"Come，tellmehowyoulive，\"Icried，\"Andwhatitisyoudo!\"
Hesaid\"Ihuntforhaddocks’eyesAmongtheheatherbright，Andworkthemintowaistcoat—buttonsInthesilentnight。
AndtheseIdonotsellforgoldOrcoinofsilveryshineButforacopperhalfpenny，Andthatwillpurchasenine。
\"Isometimesdigforbutteredrolls，Orsetlimedtwigsforcrabs；
IsometimessearchthegrassyknollsForwheelsofHansom—cabs。
Andthat’stheway\"（hegaveawink）
\"BywhichIgetmywealth——
AndverygladlywillIdrinkYourHonour’snoblehealth。\"
Iheardhimthen，forIhadjustCompletedmydesignTokeeptheMenaibridgefromrustByboilingitinwine。
IthankedmuchfortellingmeThewayhegothiswealth，ButchieflyforhiswishthatheMightdrinkmynoblehealth。
Andnow，ife’erbychanceIputMyfingersintoglueOrmadlysqueezearight—handfootIntoaleft—handshoe，OrifIdropuponmytoeAveryheavyweight，Iweep，foritremindsmeso，OfthatoldmanIusedtoknow——
Whoselookwasmild，whosespeechwasslow，Whosehairwaswhiterthanthesnow，Whosefacewasverylikeacrow，Witheyes，likecinders，allaglow，Whoseemeddistractedwithhiswoe，Whorockedhisbodytoandfro，Andmutteredmumblinglyandlow，Asifhismouthwerefullofdough，Whosnortedlikeabuffalo——Thatsummerevening，longago，A—sittingonagate。’
AstheKnightsangthelastwordsoftheballad，hegatheredupthereins，andturnedhishorse’sheadalongtheroadbywhichtheyhadcome。`You’veonlyafewyardstogo，’hesaid，’downthehillandoverthatlittlebrook，andthenyou’llbeaQueen——
Butyou’llstayandseemeofffirst？’headdedasAliceturnedwithaneagerlookinthedirectiontowhichhepointed。`I
shan’tbelong。You’llwaitandwaveyourhandkerchiefwhenI
gettothatturnintheroad？Ithinkit’llencourageme，yousee。’
`OfcourseI’llwait，’saidAlice：`andthankyouverymuchforcomingsofar——andforthesong——Ilikeditverymuch。’
`Ihopeso，’theKnightsaiddoubtfully：`butyoudidn’tcrysomuchasIthoughtyouwould。’
Sotheyshookhands，andthentheKnightrodeslowlyawayintotheforest。`Itwon’ttakelongtoseehimOFF，Iexpect，’
Alicesaidtoherself，asshestoodwatchinghim。`Therehegoes!Rightonhisheadasusual!However，hegetsonagainprettyeasily——thatcomesofhavingsomanythingshungroundthehorse——’Soshewentontalkingtoherself，asshewatchedthehorsewalkingleisurelyalongtheroad，andtheKnighttumblingoff，firstononesideandthenontheother。Afterthefourthorfifthtumblehereachedtheturn，andthenshewavedherhandkerchieftohim，andwaitedtillhewasoutofsight。
`Ihopeitencouragedhim，’shesaid，assheturnedtorundownthehill：`andnowforthelastbrook，andtobeaQueen!
Howgranditsounds!’Averyfewstepsbroughthertotheedgeofthebrook。`TheEighthSquareatlast!’shecriedassheboundedacross，*******
******
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andthrewherselfdowntorestonalawnassoftasmoss，withlittleflower—bedsdottedaboutithereandthere。`Oh，howgladIamtogethere!AndwhatISthisonmyhead？’sheexclaimedinatoneofdismay，assheputherhandsuptosomethingveryheavy，andfittedtightallroundherhead。
`ButhowCANithavegottherewithoutmyknowingit？’shesaidtoherself，asshelifteditoff，andsetitonherlaptomakeoutwhatitcouldpossiblybe。
Itwasagoldencrown。
CHAPTERIX
QueenAlice`Well，thisISgrand!’saidAlice。`IneverexpectedIshouldbeaQueensosoon——andI’lltellyouwhatitis，yourmajesty，’shewentoninaseveretone（shewasalwaysratherfondofscoldingherself），`it’llneverdoforyoutobelollingaboutonthegrasslikethat!Queenshavetobedignified，youknow!’
Soshegotupandwalkedabout——ratherstifflyjustatfirst，asshewasafraidthatthecrownmightcomeoff：butshecomfortedherselfwiththethoughtthattherewasnobodytoseeher，`andifIreallyamaQueen，’shesaidasshesatdownagain，`Ishallbeabletomanageitquitewellintime。’
Everythingwashappeningsooddlythatshedidn’tfeelabitsurprisedatfindingtheRedQueenandtheWhiteQueensittingclosetoher，oneoneachside：shewouldhavelikedverymuchtoaskthemhowtheycamethere，butshefeareditwouldnotbequitecivil。However，therewouldbenoharm，shethought，inaskingifthegamewasover。`Please，wouldyoutellme——’shebegan，lookingtimidlyattheRedQueen。
`Speakwhenyou’respokento!’TheQueensharplyinterruptedher。
`Butifeverybodyobeyedthatrule，’saidAlice，whowasalwaysreadyforalittleargument，`andifyouonlyspokewhenyouwerespokento，andtheotherpersonalwayswaitedforYOUtobegin，youseenobodywouldeversayanything，sothat——’
`Ridiculous!’criedtheQueen。`Why，don’tyousee，child——’
hereshebrokeoffwithafrown，and，afterthinkingforaminute，suddenlychangedthesubjectoftheconversation。`Whatdoyoumeanby\"IfyoureallyareaQueen\"？Whatrighthaveyoutocallyourselfso？Youcan’tbeaQueen，youknow，tillyou’vepassedtheproperexamination。Andthesoonerwebeginit，thebetter。’
`Ionlysaid\"if\"!’poorAlicepleadedinapiteoustone。
ThetwoQueenslookedateachother，andtheRedQueenremarked，withalittleshudder，`SheSAYSsheonlysaid\"if\"——’
`Butshesaidagreatdealmorethanthat!’theWhiteQueenmoaned，wringingherhands。`Oh，eversomuchmorethanthat!’
`Soyoudid，youknow，’theRedQueensaidtoAlice。`Alwaysspeakthetruth——thinkbeforeyouspeak——andwriteitdownafterwards。’
`I’msureIdidn’tmean——’Alicewasbeginning，buttheRedQueeninterruptedherimpatiently。
`That’sjustwhatIcomplainof!YouSHOULDhavemeant!Whatdoyousupposeistheuseofchildwithoutanymeaning？Evenajokeshouldhavesomemeaning——andachild’smoreimportantthanajoke，Ihope。Youcouldn’tdenythat，evenifyoutriedwithbothhands。’
`Idon’tdenythingswithmyHANDS，’Aliceobjected。
`Nobodysaidyoudid，’saidtheRedQueen。`Isaidyoucouldn’tifyoutried。’
`She’sinthatstateofmind，’saidtheWhiteQueen，`thatshewantstodenySOMETHING——onlyshedoesn’tknowwhattodeny!’
`Anasty，vicioustemper，’theRedQueenremarked；andthentherewasanuncomfortablesilenceforaminuteortwo。
TheRedQueenbrokethesilencebysayingtotheWhiteQueen，`IinviteyoutoAlice’sdinner—partythisafternoon。’
TheWhiteQueensmiledfeebly，andsaid`AndIinviteYOU。’
`Ididn’tknowIwastohaveapartyatall，’saidAlice；`butifthereistobeone，Ithink_I_oughttoinvitetheguests。’
`Wegaveyoutheopportunityofdoingit，’theRedQueenremarked：`butIdaresayyou’venothadmanylessonsinmannersyet？’
`Mannersarenottaughtinlessons，’saidAlice。`Lessonsteachyoutodosums，andthingsofthatsort。’
`AndyoudoAddition？’theWhiteQueenasked。`What’soneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandoneandone？’
`Idon’tknow，’saidAlice。`Ilostcount。’
`Shecan’tdoAddition，’theRedQueeninterrupted。
`CanyoudoSubtraction？Takeninefromeight。’
`NinefromeightIcan’t，youknow，’Alicerepliedveryreadily：
`but——’
`Shecan’tdoSubtraction，’saidtheWhiteQueen。`CanyoudoDivision？Dividealoafbyaknife——what’stheanswertothat？’
`Isuppose——’Alicewasbeginning，buttheRedQueenansweredforher。`Bread—and—butter，ofcourse。TryanotherSubtractionsum。Takeabonefromadog：whatremains？’
Aliceconsidered。`Thebonewouldn’tremain，ofcourse，ifI
tookit——andthedogwouldn’tremain；itwouldcometobiteme——andI’msureIshouldn’tremain!’
`Thenyouthinknothingwouldremain？’saidtheRedQueen。
`Ithinkthat’stheanswer。’
`Wrong，asusual，’saidtheRedQueen：`thedog’stemperwouldremain。’
`ButIdon’tseehow——’
`Why，lookhere!’theRedQueencried。`Thedogwouldloseitstemper，wouldn’tit？’
`Perhapsitwould，’Alicerepliedcautiously。
`Thenifthedogwentaway，itstemperwouldremain!’theQueenexclaimedtriumphantly。
Alicesaid，asgravelyasshecould，`Theymightgodifferentways。’Butshecouldn’thelpthinkingtoherself，`WhatdreadfulnonsenseweAREtalking!’
`Shecan’tdosumsaBIT!’theQueenssaidtogether，withgreatemphasis。
`CanYOUdosums？’Alicesaid，turningsuddenlyontheWhiteQueen，forshedidn’tlikebeingfoundfaultwithsomuch。
TheQueengaspedandshuthereyes。`IcandoAddition，’`ifyougivemetime——butIcandoSubtraction，underANY
circumstances!’
`OfcourseyouknowyourABC？’saidtheRedQueen。
`TobesureIdo。’saidAlice。
`SodoI，’theWhiteQueenwhispered：`we’lloftensayitovertogether，dear。AndI’lltellyouasecret——Icanreadwordsofoneletter!Isn’tTHATgrand!However，don’tbediscouraged。
You’llcometoitintime。’
HeretheRedQueenbeganagain。`Canyouanswerusefulquestions？’shesaid。`Howisbreadmade？’
`IknowTHAT!’Alicecriedeagerly。`Youtakesomeflour——’
`Wheredoyoupicktheflower？’theWhiteQueenasked。`Inagarden，orinthehedges？’
`Well，itisn’tPICKEDatall，’Aliceexplained：`it’sGROUND
——’
`Howmanyacresofground？’saidtheWhiteQueen。`Youmustn’tleaveoutsomanythings。’
`Fanherhead!’theRedQueenanxiouslyinterrupted。`She’llbefeverishaftersomuchthinking。’Sotheysettoworkandfannedherwithbunchesofleaves，tillshehadtobegthemtoleaveoff，itblewherhairaboutso。
`She’sallrightagainnow，’saidtheRedQueen。`DoyouknowLanguages？What’stheFrenchforfiddle—de—dee？’
`Fiddle—de—dee’snotEnglish，’Alicerepliedgravely。
`Whoeversaiditwas？’saidtheRedQueen。
Alicethoughtshesawawayoutofthedifficultythistime。
`Ifyou’lltellmewhatlanguage\"fiddle—de—dee\"is，I’lltellyoutheFrenchforit!’sheexclaimedtriumphantly。
ButtheRedQueendrewherselfupratherstiffly，andsaid`Queensnevermakebargains。’
`IwishQueensneveraskedquestions，’Alicethoughttoherself。
`Don’tletusquarrel，’theWhiteQueensaidinananxioustone。`Whatisthecauseoflightning？’
`Thecauseoflightning，’Alicesaidverydecidedly，forshefeltquitecertainaboutthis，`isthethunder——no，no!’shehastilycorrectedherself。`Imeanttheotherway。’
`It’stoolatetocorrectit，’saidtheRedQueen：`whenyou’veoncesaidathing，thatfixesit，andyoumusttaketheconsequences。’
`Whichremindsme——’theWhiteQueensaid，lookingdownandnervouslyclaspingandunclaspingherhands，`wehadSUCHathunderstormlastTuesday——ImeanoneofthelastsetofTuesdays，youknow。’
Alicewaspuzzled。`InOURcountry，’sheremarked，`there’sonlyonedayatatime。’
TheRedQueensaid，`That’sapoorthinwayofdoingthings。
NowHERE，wemostlyhavedaysandnightstwoorthreeatatime，andsometimesinthewinterwetakeasmanyasfivenightstogether——forwarmth，youknow。’
`Arefivenightswarmerthanonenight，then？’Aliceventuredtoask。
`Fivetimesaswarm，ofcourse。’
`ButtheyshouldbefivetimesasCOLD，bythesamerule——’
`Justso!’criedtheRedQueen。`Fivetimesaswarm，ANDfivetimesascold——justasI’mfivetimesasrichasyouare，AND
fivetimesasclever!’
Alicesighedandgaveitup。`It’sexactlylikeariddlewithnoanswer!’shethought。
`HumptyDumptysawittoo，’theWhiteQueenwentoninalowvoice，moreasifsheweretalkingtoherself。`Hecametothedoorwithacorkscrewinhishand——’
`Whatdidhewant？’saidtheRedQueen。
`HesaidheWOULDcomein，’theWhiteQueenwenton，`becausehewaslookingforahippopotamus。Now，asithappened，therewasn’tsuchathinginthehouse，thatmorning。’
`Istheregenerally？’Aliceaskedinanastonishedtone。
`Well，onlyonThursdays，’saidtheQueen。
`Iknowwhathecamefor，’saidAlice：`hewantedtopunishthefish，because——’
HeretheWhiteQueenbeganagain。`ItwasSUCHathunderstorm，youcan’tthink!’（SheNEVERcould，youknow，’saidtheRedQueen。）`Andpartoftheroofcameoff，andeversomuchthundergotin——anditwentrollingroundtheroomingreatlumps——
andknockingoverthetablesandthings——tillIwassofrightened，Icouldn’tremembermyownname!’
Alicethoughttoherself，`InevershouldTRYtoremembermynameinthemiddleofanaccident!Wherewouldbetheuseofit？’butshedidnotsaythisaloud，forfearofhurtingthepoorQueen’sfeeling。
`YourMajestymustexcuseher，’theRedQueensaidtoAlice，takingoneoftheWhiteQueen’shandsinherown，andgentlystrokingit：`shemeanswell，butshecan’thelpsayingfoolishthings，asageneralrule。’
TheWhiteQueenlookedtimidlyatAlice，whofeltsheOUGHTtosaysomethingkind，butreallycouldn’tthinkofanythingatthemoment。
`Sheneverwasreallywellbroughtup，’theRedQueenwenton：
`butit’samazinghowgood—temperedsheis!Patheronthehead，andseehowpleasedshe’llbe!’ButthiswasmorethanAlicehadcouragetodo。
`Alittlekindness——andputtingherhairinpapers——woulddowonderswithher——’
TheWhiteQueengaveadeepsigh，andlaidherheadonAlice’sshoulder。`IAMsosleepy？’shemoaned。
`She’stired，poorthing!’saidtheRedQueen。`Smoothherhair——lendheryournightcap——andsingherasoothinglullaby。’
`Ihaven’tgotanightcapwithme，’saidAlice，asshetriedtoobeythefirstdirection：`andIdon’tknowanysoothinglullabies。’
`Imustdoitmyself，then，’saidtheRedQueen，andshebegan：
`Hush—a—bylady，inAlice’slap!
Tillthefeast’sready，we’vetimeforanap：
Whenthefeast’sover，we’llgototheball——
RedQueen，andWhiteQueen，andAlice，andall!
`Andnowyouknowthewords，’sheadded，assheputherheaddownonAlice’sothershoulder，`justsingitthroughtoME。I’mgettingsleepy，too。’InanothermomentbothQueenswerefastasleep，andsnoringloud。
`WhatAMItodo？’exclaimedAlice，lookingaboutingreatperplexity，asfirstoneroundhead，andthentheother，rolleddownfromhershoulder，andlaylikeaheavylumpinherlap。
`Idon’tthinkitEVERhappenedbefore，thatanyonehadtotakecareoftwoQueensasleepatonce!No，notinalltheHistoryofEngland——itcouldn’t，youknow，becausethereneverwasmorethanoneQueenatatime。`Dowakeup，youheavythings!’
shewentoninanimpatienttone；buttherewasnoanswerbutagentlesnoring。
Thesnoringgotmoredistincteveryminute，andsoundedmorelikeatune：atlastshecouldevenmakeoutthewords，andshelistenedsoeagerlythat，whenthetwogreatheadsvanishedfromherlap，shehardlymissedthem。
ShewasstandingbeforeanarcheddoorwayoverwhichwerethewordsQUEENALICEinlargeletters，andoneachsideofthearchtherewasabell—handle；onewasmarked`Visitors’Bell，’andtheother`Servants’Bell。’
`I’llwaittillthesong’sover，’thoughtAlice，`andthenI’llring——the——WHICHbellmustIring？’shewenton，verymuchpuzzledbythenames。`I’mnotavisitor，andI’mnotaservant。
ThereOUGHTtobeonemarked\"Queen，\"youknow——’
Justthenthedooropenedalittleway，andacreaturewithalongbeakputitsheadoutforamomentandsaid`Noadmittancetilltheweekafternext!’andshutthedooragainwithabang。
Aliceknockedandranginvainforalongtime，butatlast，averyoldFrog，whowassittingunderatree，gotupandhobbledslowlytowardsher：hewasdressedinbrightyellow，andhadenormousbootson。
`Whatisit，now？’theFrogsaidinadeephoarsewhisper。
Aliceturnedround，readytofindfaultwithanybody。`Where’stheservantwhosebusinessitistoanswerthedoor？’shebeganangrily。
`Whichdoor？’saidtheFrog。
Alicealmoststampedwithirritationattheslowdrawlinwhichhespoke。`THISdoor，ofcourse!’
TheFroglookedatthedoorwithhislargedulleyesforaminute：
thenhewentnearerandrubbeditwithhisthumb，asifheweretryingwhetherthepaintwouldcomeoff；thenhelookedatAlice。
`Toanswerthedoor？’hesaid。`What’sitbeenaskingof？’
HewassohoarsethatAlicecouldscarcelyhearhim。
`Idon’tknowwhatyoumean，’shesaid。
`ItalksEnglish，doesn’tI？’theFrogwenton。`Orareyoudeaf？
Whatdiditaskyou？’
`Nothing!’Alicesaidimpatiently。`I’vebeenknockingatit!’
`Shouldn’tdothat——shouldn’tdothat——’theFrogmuttered。
`Vexesit，youknow。’Thenhewentupandgavethedoorakickwithoneofhisgreatfeet。`YouletITalone，’hepantedout，ashehobbledbacktohistree，`andit’llletYOUalone，youknow。’
Atthismomentthedoorwasflungopen，andashrillvoicewasheardsinging：
`TotheLooking—GlassworlditwasAlicethatsaid，\"I’veasceptreinhand，I’veacrownonmyhead；
LettheLooking—Glasscreatures，whatevertheybe，ComeanddinewiththeRedQueen，theWhiteQueen，andme。\"’
Andhundredsofvoicesjoinedinthechorus：
`Thenfilluptheglassesasquickasyoucan，Andsprinklethetablewithbuttonsandbran：
Putcatsinthecoffee，andmiceinthetea——
AndwelcomeQueenAlicewiththirty—times—three!’
Thenfollowedaconfusednoiseofcheering，andAlicethoughttoherself，`Thirtytimesthreemakesninety。Iwonderifanyone’scounting？’Inaminutetherewassilenceagain，andthesameshrillvoicesanganotherverse；
`\"OLooking—Glasscreatures，\"quotheAlice，\"drawnear!
’Tisanhonourtoseeme，afavourtohear：
’TisaprivilegehightohavedinnerandteaAlongwiththeRedQueen，theWhiteQueen，andme!\"’
Thencamethechorusagain：——
`Thenfilluptheglasseswithtreacleandink，Oranythingelsethatispleasanttodrink：
Mixsandwiththecider，andwoolwiththewine——
AndwelcomeQueenAlicewithninety—times—nine!’
`Ninetytimesnine!’Alicerepeatedindespair，`Oh，that’llneverbedone!I’dbettergoinatonce——’andtherewasadeadsilencethemomentsheappeared。
Aliceglancednervouslyalongthetable，asshewalkedupthelargehall，andnoticedthattherewereaboutfiftyguests，ofallkinds：somewereanimals，somebirds，andtherewereevenafewflowersamongthem。`I’mgladthey’vecomewithoutwaitingtobeasked，’shethought：`Ishouldneverhaveknownwhoweretherightpeopletoinvite!’
Therewerethreechairsattheheadofthetable；theRedandWhiteQueenshadalreadytakentwoofthem，butthemiddleonewasempty。Alicesatdowninit，ratheruncomfortableinthesilence，andlongingforsomeonetospeak。
AtlasttheRedQueenbegan。`You’vemissedthesoupandfish，’shesaid。`Putonthejoint!’AndthewaiterssetalegofmuttonbeforeAlice，wholookedatitratheranxiously，asshehadneverhadtocarveajointbefore。
`Youlookalittleshy；letmeintroduceyoutothatlegofmutton，’saidtheRedQueen。`Alice——Mutton；Mutton——Alice。’
ThelegofmuttongotupinthedishandmadealittlebowtoAlice；andAlicereturnedthebow，notknowingwhethertobefrightenedoramused。
`MayIgiveyouaslice？’shesaid，takinguptheknifeandfork，andlookingfromoneQueentotheother。
`Certainlynot，’theRedQueensaid，verydecidedly：
`itisn’tetiquettetocutanyoneyou’vebeenintroducedto。
Removethejoint!’Andthewaiterscarrieditoff，andbroughtalargeplum—puddinginitsplace。
`Iwon’tbeintroducedtothepudding，please，’Alicesaidratherhastily，`orweshallgetnodinneratall。MayIgiveyousome？’
ButtheRedQueenlookedsulky，andgrowled`Pudding——Alice；
Alice——Pudding。Removethepudding!’andthewaiterstookitawaysoquicklythatAlicecouldn’treturnitsbow。
However，shedidn’tseewhytheRedQueenshouldbetheonlyonetogiveorders，so，asanexperiment，shecalledout`Waiter!
Bringbackthepudding!’andthereitwasagaininamomentlikeaconjuring—trick。Itwassolargethatshecouldn’thelpfeelingaLITTLEshywithit，asshehadbeenwiththemutton；
however，sheconqueredhershynessbyagreateffortandcutasliceandhandedittotheRedQueen。
`Whatimpertinence!’saidthePudding。`Iwonderhowyou’dlikeit，ifIweretocutasliceoutofYOU，youcreature!’
Itspokeinathick，suetysortofvoice，andAlicehadn’tawordtosayinreply：shecouldonlysitandlookatitandgasp。
`Makearemark，’saidtheRedQueen：`it’sridiculoustoleavealltheconversationtothepudding!’
`Doyouknow，I’vehadsuchaquantityofpoetryrepeatedtometo—day，’Alicebegan，alittlefrightenedatfindingthat，themomentsheopenedherlips，therewasdeadsilence，andalleyeswerefixeduponher；`andit’saverycuriousthing，Ithink——
everypoemwasaboutfishesinsomeway。Doyouknowwhythey’resofondoffishes，allabouthere？’
ShespoketotheRedQueen，whoseanswerwasalittlewideofthemark。`Astofishes，’shesaid，veryslowlyandsolemnly，puttinghermouthclosetoAlice’sear，`herWhiteMajestyknowsalovelyriddle——allinpoetry——allaboutfishes。Shallsherepeatit？’
`HerRedMajesty’sverykindtomentionit，’theWhiteQueenmurmuredintoAlice’sotherear，inavoicelikethecooingofapigeon。`ItwouldbeSUCHatreat!MayI？’
`Pleasedo，’Alicesaidverypolitely。
TheWhiteQueenlaughedwithdelight，andstrokedAlice’scheek。Thenshebegan：
`\"First，thefishmustbecaught。\"
Thatiseasy：ababy，Ithink，couldhavecaughtit。
\"Next，thefishmustbebought。\"
Thatiseasy：apenny，Ithink，wouldhaveboughtit。
\"Nowcookmethefish!\"
Thatiseasy，andwillnottakemorethanaminute。
\"Letitlieinadish!\"
Thatiseasy，becauseitalreadyisinit。
\"Bringithere!Letmesup!\"
Itiseasytosetsuchadishonthetable。
\"Takethedish—coverup!\"
Ah，THATissohardthatIfearI’munable!
Foritholdsitlikeglue——
Holdsthelidtothedish，whileitliesinthemiddle：
Whichiseasiesttodo，Un—dish—coverthefish，ordishcovertheriddle？’
`Takeaminutetothinkaboutit，andthenguess，’saidtheRedQueen。
`Meanwhile，we’lldrinkyourhealth——QueenAlice’shealth!’
shescreamedatthetopofhervoice，andalltheguestsbegandrinkingitdirectly，andveryqueerlytheymanagedit：
someofthemputtheirglassesupontheirheadslikeextinguishers，anddrankallthattrickleddowntheirfaces——othersupsetthedecanters，anddrankthewineasitranofftheedgesofthetable——andthreeofthem（wholookedlikekangaroos）scrambledintothedishofroastmutton，andbeganeagerlylappingupthegravy，`justlikepigsinatrough!’
thoughtAlice。
`Yououghttoreturnthanksinaneatspeech，’theRedQueensaid，frowningatAliceasshespoke。
`Wemustsupportyou，youknow，’theWhiteQueenwhispered，asAlicegotuptodoit，veryobediently，butalittlefrightened。
`Thankyouverymuch，’shewhisperedinreply，`butIcandoquitewellwithout。’
`Thatwouldn’tbeatallthething，’theRedQueensaidverydecidedly：soAlicetriedtosubmittoitwithagoodgrace。
（`AndtheyDIDpushso!’shesaidafterwards，whenshewastellinghersisterthehistoryofthefeast。`Youwouldhavethoughttheywantedtosqueezemeflat!’）
Infactitwasratherdifficultforhertokeepinherplacewhileshemadeherspeech：thetwoQueenspushedherso，oneoneachside，thattheynearlyliftedherupintotheair：`Irisetoreturnthanks——’Alicebegan：andshereallyDIDriseasshespoke，severalinches；butshegotholdoftheedgeofthetable，andmanagedtopullherselfdownagain。
`Takecareofyourself!’screamedtheWhiteQueen，seizingAlice’shairwithbothherhands。`Something’sgoingtohappen!’
Andthen（asAliceafterwardsdescribedit）allsortsofthinghappenedinamoment。Thecandlesallgrewuptotheceiling，lookingsomethinglikeabedofrusheswithfireworksatthetop。
Astothebottles，theyeachtookapairofplates，whichtheyhastilyfittedonaswings，andso，withforksforlegs，wentflutteringaboutinalldirections：`andverylikebirdstheylook，’Alicethoughttoherself，aswellasshecouldinthedreadfulconfusionthatwasbeginning。
Atthismomentsheheardahoarselaughatherside，andturnedtoseewhatwasthematterwiththeWhiteQueen；but，insteadoftheQueen，therewasthelegofmuttonsittinginthechair。
`HereIam!’criedavoicefromthesouptureen，andAliceturnedagain，justintimetoseetheQueen’sbroadgood—naturedfacegrinningatherforamomentovertheedgeofthetureen，beforeshedisappearedintothesoup。
Therewasnotamomenttobelost。Alreadyseveraloftheguestswerelyingdowninthedishes，andthesoupladlewaswalkingupthetabletowardsAlice’schair，andbeckoningtoherimpatientlytogetoutofitsway。
`Ican’tstandthisanylonger!’shecriedasshejumpedupandseizedthetable—clothwithbothhands：onegoodpull，andplates，dishes，guests，andcandlescamecrashingdowntogetherinaheaponthefloor。
`AndasforYOU，’shewenton，turningfiercelyupontheRedQueen，whomsheconsideredasthecauseofallthemischief——buttheQueenwasnolongeratherside——shehadsuddenlydwindleddowntothesizeofalittledoll，andwasnowonthetable，merrilyrunningroundandroundafterherownshawl，whichwastrailingbehindher。
Atanyothertime，Alicewouldhavefeltsurprisedatthis，butshewasfartoomuchexcitedtobesurprisedatanythingNOW。
`AsforYOU，’sherepeated，catchingholdofthelittlecreatureintheveryactofjumpingoverabottlewhichhadjustlighteduponthetable，`I’llshakeyouintoakitten，thatIwill!’
CHAPTERX
ShakingShetookheroffthetableasshespoke，andshookherbackwardsandforwardswithallhermight。
TheRedQueenmadenoresistancewhatever；onlyherfacegrewverysmall，andhereyesgotlargeandgreen：andstill，asAlicewentonshakingher，shekeptongrowingshorter——andfatter——andsofter——androunder——and——
CHAPTERXI
Waking——anditreallyWASakitten，afterall。
CHAPTERXII
WhichDreamedit？
`Yourmajestyshouldn’tpurrsoloud，’Alicesaid，rubbinghereyes，andaddressingthekitten，respectfully，yetwithsomeseverity。`Youwokemeoutofoh!suchanicedream!Andyou’vebeenalongwithme，Kitty——allthroughtheLooking—Glassworld。
Didyouknowit，dear？’
Itisaveryinconvenienthabitofkittens（Alicehadoncemadetheremark）that，whateveryousaytothem，theyALWAYSpurr。
`Ifthemwouldonlypurrfor\"yes\"andmewfor\"no，\"oranyruleofthatsort，’shehadsaid，`sothatonecouldkeepupaconversation!ButhowCANyoutalkwithapersoniftheyalwayssaythesamething？’
Onthisoccasionthekittenonlypurred：anditwasimpossibletoguesswhetheritmeant`yes’or`no。’
SoAlicehuntedamongthechessmenonthetabletillshehadfoundtheRedQueen：thenshewentdownonherkneesonthehearth—rug，andputthekittenandtheQueentolookateachother。`Now，Kitty!’shecried，clappingherhandstriumphantly。
`Confessthatwaswhatyouturnedinto!’
（`Butitwouldn’tlookatit，’shesaid，whenshewasexplainingthethingafterwardstohersister：`itturnedawayitshead，andpretendednottoseeit：butitlookedaLITTLE
ashamedofitself，soIthinkitMUSThavebeentheRedQueen。’）
`Situpalittlemorestiffly，dear!’Alicecriedwithamerrylaugh。`Andcurtseywhileyou’rethinkingwhatto——whattopurr。Itsavestime，remember!’Andshecaughtitupandgaveitonelittlekiss，`justinhonourofhavingbeenaRedQueen。’
`Snowdrop，mypet!’shewenton，lookingoverhershoulderattheWhiteKitten，whichwasstillpatientlyundergoingitstoilet，`whenWILLDinahhavefinishedwithyourWhiteMajesty，I
wonder？Thatmustbethereasonyouweresountidyinmydream——
Dinah!doyouknowthatyou’rescrubbingaWhiteQueen？
Really，it’smostdisrespectfulofyou!
`AndwhatdidDINAHturnto，Iwonder？’sheprattledon，asshesettledcomfortablydown，withoneelbowintherug，andherchininherhand，towatchthekittens。`Tellme，Dinah，didyouturntoHumptyDumpty？ITHINKyoudid——however，you’dbetternotmentionittoyourfriendsjustyet，forI’mnotsure。
`Bytheway，Kitty，ifonlyyou’dbeenreallywithmeinmydream，therewasonethingyouWOULDhaveenjoyed——Ihadsuchaquantityofpoetrysaidtome，allaboutfishes!To—morrowmorningyoushallhavearealtreat。Allthetimeyou’reeatingyourbreakfast，I’llrepeat\"TheWalrusandtheCarpenter\"toyou；andthenyoucanmakebelieveit’soysters，dear!
`Now，Kitty，let’sconsiderwhoitwasthatdreameditall。
Thisisaseriousquestion，mydear，andyoushouldNOTgoonlickingyourpawlikethat——asifDinahhadn’twashedyouthismorning!Yousee，Kitty，itMUSThavebeeneithermeortheRedKing。Hewaspartofmydream，ofcourse——butthenIwaspartofhisdream，too!WASittheRedKing，Kitty？Youwerehiswife，mydear，soyououghttoknow——Oh，Kitty，DOhelptosettleit!I’msureyourpawcanwait!’Buttheprovokingkittenonlybeganontheotherpaw，andpretendedithadn’theardthequestion。
WhichdoYOUthinkitwas？
———
Aboatbeneathasunnysky，LingeringonwarddreamilyInaneveningofJuly——
Childrenthreethatnestlenear，Eagereyeandwillingear，Pleasedasimpletaletohear——
Longhaspaledthatsunnysky：
Echoesfadeandmemoriesdie。
AutumnfrostshaveslainJuly。
Stillshehauntsme，phantomwise，AlicemovingunderskiesNeverseenbywakingeyes。
Childrenyet，thetaletohear，Eagereyeandwillingear，Lovinglyshallnestlenear。
InaWonderlandtheylie，Dreamingasthedaysgoby，Dreamingasthesummersdie：
Everdriftingdownthestream——
Lingeringinthegoldengleam——
Life，whatisitbutadream？