FromthencetheyproceededtotheStraits，enteredtheMediterranean，andatlengtharrivedatVenice。
\"Godbepraised\"，saidCandide，embracingMartin，\"thisistheplacewhereIamtobeholdmybelovedCunegondeonceagain。IcanconfideinCacambo，likeanotherself。Alliswell，allisverywell，alliswellaspossible。\"
chapter24CHAPTERXXIV
OFPACQUETTEANDFRIARGIROFLEE
UpontheirarrivalatVeniceCandidewentinsearchofCacamboateveryinnandcoffee-house，andamongalltheladiesofpleasure，butcouldhearnothingofhim。Hesenteverydaytoinquirewhatshipswerein，stillnonewsofCacambo。
\"Itisstrange\"，saidhetoMartin，\"verystrangethatIshouldhavetimetosailfromSurinamtoBordeaux;totravelthencetoParis，toDieppe，toPortsmouth;tosailalongthecoastofPortugalandSpain，anduptheMediterraneantospendsomemonthsatVenice;andthatmylovelyCunegondeshouldnothavearrived。Insteadofher，IonlymetwithaParisianimpostor，andarascallyabbeofPerigord。Cunegondeisactuallydead，andIhavenothingtodobutfollowher。Alas！howmuchbetterwouldithavebeenformetohaveremainedintheparadiseofElDoradothantohavereturnedtothiscursedEurope！Youareintheright，mydearMartin;
youarecertainlyintheright;allismiseryanddeceit。\"
Hefellintoadeepmelancholy，andneitherwenttotheoperatheninvogue，norpartookofanyofthediversionsoftheCarnival;
nay，heevenslightedthefairsex。
Martinsaidtohim，\"Uponmyword，Ithinkyouareverysimpletoimaginethatarascallyvalet，withfiveorsixmillionsinhispocket，wouldgoinsearchofyourmistresstothefurtheroftheworld，andbringhertoVenicetomeetyou。Ifhefindsherhewilltakeherforhimself;ifhedoesnot，hewilltakeanother。LetmeadviseyoutoforgetyourvaletCacambo，andyourmistressCunegonde。\"
Martin’sspeechwasnotthemostconsolatorytothedejectedCandide。Hismelancholyincreased，andMartinneverceasedtryingtoprovetohimthatthereisverylittlevirtueorhappinessinthisworld;
except，perhaps，inElDorado，wherehardlyanybodycangainadmittance。
Whiletheyweredisputingonthisimportantsubject，andstillexpectingMissCunegonde，CandideperceivedayoungTheatinfriarinthePiazzaSanMarco，withagirlunderhisarm。TheTheatinlookedfresh-colored，plump，andvigorous;hiseyessparkled;hisairandgaitwereboldandlofty。Thegirlwaspretty，andwassingingasong;andeverynowandthengaveherTheatinanamorousogleandwantonlypinchedhisruddycheeks。
\"Youwillatleastallow\"，saidCandidetoMartin，\"thatthesetwoarehappy。
HithertoIhavemetwithnonebutunfortunatepeopleinthewholehabitableglobe，exceptinElDorado;butastothiscouple，Iwouldventuretolayawagertheyarehappy。\"
\"Done！\"saidMartin，\"theyarenotwhatyouimagine。\"
\"Well，wehaveonlytoaskthemtodinewithus\"，saidCandide，\"andyouwillseewhetherIammistakenornot。\"
Thereuponheaccostedthem，andwithgreatpolitenessinvitedthemtohisinntoeatsomemacaroni，withLombardpartridgesandcaviar，andtodrinkabottleofMontepulciano，LacrymaChristi，Cyprus，andSamoswine。Thegirlblushed;theTheatinacceptedtheinvitationandshefollowedhim，eyeingCandideeverynowandthenwithamixtureofsurpriseandconfusion，whilethetearsstoledownhercheeks。Nosoonerdidsheenterhisapartmentthanshecriedout，\"How，MonsieurCandide，haveyouquiteforgotyourPacquette？doyounotknowheragain？\"
Candidehadnotregardedherwithanydegreeofattentionbefore，beingwhollyoccupiedwiththethoughtsofhisdearCunegonde。
\"Ah！isityou，child？wasityouthatreducedDr。PanglosstothatfineconditionIsawhimin？\"
\"Alas！sir\"，answeredPacquette，\"itwasI，indeed。Ifindyouareacquaintedwitheverything;andIhavebeeninformedofallthemisfortunesthathappenedtothewholefamilyofMyLadyBaronessandthefairCunegonde。ButIcansafelysweartoyouthatmylotwasnolessdeplorable;Iwasinnocenceitselfwhenyousawmelast。
AFranciscan，whowasmyconfessor，easilyseducedme;theconsequencesprovedterrible。I
wasobligedtoleavethecastlesometimeaftertheBaronkickedyououtbythebacksidefromthere;andifafamoussurgeonhadnottakencompassiononme，Ihadbeenadeadwoman。Gratitudeobligedmetolivewithhimsometimeashismistress;hiswife，whowasaverydevilforjealousy，beatmeunmercifullyeveryday。Oh！shewasaperfectfury。Thedoctorhimselfwasthemostuglyofallmortals，andI
themostwretchedcreatureexisting，tobecontinuallybeatenforamanwhomIdidnotlove。
Youaresensible，sir，howdangerousitwasforanill-naturedwomantobemarriedtoaphysician。Incensedatthebehaviorofhiswife，heonedaygavehersoaffectionatearemedyforaslightcoldshehadcaughtthatshediedinlessthantwohoursinmostdreadfulconvulsions。
Herrelationsprosecutedthehusband，whowasobligedtofly，andI
wassenttoprison。
Myinnocencewouldnothavesavedme，ifIhadnotbeentolerablyhandsome。Thejudgegavememylibertyonconditionheshouldsucceedthedoctor。However，Iwassoonsupplantedbyarival，turnedoffwithoutafarthing，andobligedtocontinuetheabominabletradewhichyoumenthinksopleasing，butwhichtousunhappycreaturesisthemostdreadfulofallsufferings。AtlengthIcametofollowthebusinessatVenice。Ah！sir，didyoubutknowwhatitistobeobligedtoreceiveeveryvisitor;oldtradesmen，counselors，monks，watermen，andabbes;tobeexposedtoalltheirinsolenceandabuse;tobeoftennecessitatedtoborrowapetticoat，onlythatitmaybetakenupbysomedisagreeablewretch;toberobbedbyonegallantofwhatwegetfromanother;tobesubjecttotheextortionsofcivilmagistrates;andtohaveforeverbeforeone’seyestheprospectofoldage，ahospital，oradunghill，youwouldconcludethatIamoneofthemostunhappywretchesbreathing。\"
ThusdidPacquetteunbosomherselftohonestCandideinhiscloset，inthepresenceofMartin，whotookoccasiontosaytohim，\"YouseeIhavehalfwonthewageralready。\"
FriarGirofleewasallthistimeintheparlorrefreshinghimselfwithaglassortwoofwinetilldinnerwasready。
\"But\"，saidCandidetoPacquette，\"youlookedsogayandcontented，whenI
metyou，yousangandcaressedtheTheatinwithsomuchfondness，thatI
absolutelythoughtyouashappyasyousayyouarenowmiserable。\"
\"Ah！dearsir\"，saidPacquette，\"thisisoneofthemiseriesofthetrade;
yesterdayIwasstrippedandbeatenbyanofficer;yettodayImustappeargoodhumoredandgaytopleaseafriar。\"
CandidewasconvincedandacknowledgedthatMartinwasintheright。
TheysatdowntotablewithPacquetteandtheTheatin;
theentertainmentwasagreeable，andtowardstheendtheybegantoconversetogetherwithsomefreedom。
\"Father\"，saidCandidetothefriar，\"youseemtometoenjoyastateofhappinessthatevenkingsmightenvy;joyandhealtharepaintedinyourcountenance。Youhaveaprettywenchtodivertyou;andyouseemtobeperfectlywellcontentedwithyourconditionasaTheatin。\"
\"Faith，sir\"，saidFriarGiroflee，\"IwishwithallmysoultheTheatinswereeveryoneofthematthebottomofthesea。IhavebeentemptedathousandtimestosetfiretothemonasteryandgoandturnTurk。
Myparentsobligedme，attheageoffifteen，toputonthisdetestablehabitonlytoincreasethefortuneofanelderbrotherofmine，whomGodconfound！
jealousy，discord，andfury，resideinourmonastery。ItistrueIhavepreachedoftenpaltrysermons，bywhichIhavegotalittlemoney，partofwhichthepriorrobsmeof，andtheremainderhelpstopaymygirls;but，notwithstanding，atnight，whenIgohencetomymonastery，Iamreadytodashmybrainsagainstthewallsofthedormitory;andthisisthecasewithalltherestofourfraternity。\"
Martin，turningtowardsCandide，withhisusualindifference，said，\"Well，whatthinkyounow？haveIwonthewagerentirely？\"
CandidegavetwothousandpiastrestoPacquette，andathousandtoFriarGiroflee，saying，\"Iwillanswerthatthiswillmakethemhappy。\"
\"Iamnotofyouropinion\"，saidMartin，\"perhapsthismoneywillonlymakethemwretched。\"
\"Bethatasitmay\"，saidCandide，\"onethingcomfortsme;Iseethatoneoftenmeetswiththosewhomoneneverexpectedtoseeagain;sothat，perhaps，asIhavefoundmyredsheepandPacquette，I
maybeluckyenoughtofindMissCunegondealso。\"
\"Iwish\"，saidMartin，\"sheonedaymaymakeyouhappy;
butIdoubtitmuch。\"
\"Youlackfaith\"，saidCandide。
\"Itisbecause\"，saidMartin，\"Ihaveseentheworld。\"
\"Observethosegondoliers\"，saidCandide，\"aretheynotperpetuallysinging？\"
\"Youdonotseethem\"，answeredMartin，\"athomewiththeirwivesandbrats。Thedogehashischagrin，gondolierstheirs。Nevertheless，inthemain，Ilookuponthegondolier’slifeaspreferabletothatofthedoge;butthedifferenceissotriflingthatitisnotworththetroubleofexamininginto。\"
\"Ihaveheardgreattalk\"，saidCandide，\"oftheSenatorPococurante，wholivesinthatfinehouseattheBrenta，where，theysay，heentertainsforeignersinthemostpolitemanner。\"
\"Theypretendthismanisaperfectstrangertouneasiness。
Ishouldbegladtoseesoextraordinaryabeing\"，saidMartin。
CandidethereuponsentamessengertoSeignorPococurante，desiringpermissiontowaitonhimthenextday。
chapter25CHAPTERXXV
CANDIDEANDMARTINPAYAVISIT
TOSEIGNOR
POCOCURANTE，ANOBLEVENETIAN
CandideandhisfriendMartinwentinagondolaontheBrenta，andarrivedatthepalaceofthenoblePococurante。Thegardenswerelaidoutineleganttaste，andadornedwithfinemarblestatues;hispalacewasbuiltafterthemostapprovedrulesofarchitecture。Themasterofthehouse，whowasamanofaffairs，andveryrich，receivedourtwotravelerswithgreatpoliteness，butwithoutmuchceremony，whichsomewhatdisconcertedCandide，butwasnotatalldispleasingtoMartin。
Assoonastheywereseated，twoveryprettygirls，neatlydressed，broughtinchocolate，whichwasextremelywellprepared。Candidecouldnothelppraisingtheirbeautyandgracefulcarriage。
\"Thecreaturesareallright\"，saidthesenator;\"Iamusemyselfwiththemsometimes，forIamheartilytiredofthewomenofthetown，theircoquetry，theirjealousy，theirquarrels，theirhumors，theirmeannesses，theirpride，andtheirfolly;Iamwearyofmakingsonnets，orofpayingforsonnetstobemadeonthem;butafterall，thesetwogirlsbegintogrowveryindifferenttome。\"
Afterhavingrefreshedhimself，Candidewalkedintoalargegallery，wherehewasstruckwiththesightofafinecollectionofpaintings。
\"Pray\"，saidCandide，\"bywhatmasterarethetwofirstofthese？\"
\"TheyarebyRaphael\"，answeredthesenator。\"Igaveagreatdealofmoneyforthemsevenyearsago，purelyoutofcuriosity，astheyweresaidtobethefinestpiecesinItaly;butIcannotsaytheypleaseme：thecoloringisdarkandheavy;thefiguresdonotswellnorcomeoutenough;andthedraperyisbad。Inshort，notwithstandingtheencomiumslavisheduponthem，theyarenot，inmyopinion，atruerepresentationofnature。IapproveofnopaintingssavethosewhereinIthinkIbeholdnatureitself;andtherearefew，ifany，ofthatkindtobemetwith。Ihavewhatiscalledafinecollection，butItakenomannerofdelightinit。\"
WhiledinnerwasbeingpreparedPococuranteorderedaconcert。
Candidepraisedthemusictotheskies。
\"Thisnoise\"，saidthenobleVenetian，\"mayamuseoneforalittletime，butifitweretolastabovehalfanhour，itwouldgrowtiresometoeverybody，thoughperhapsnoonewouldcaretoownit。Musichasbecometheartofexecutingwhatisdifficult;now，whateverisdifficultcannotbelongpleasing。
\"IbelieveImighttakemorepleasureinanopera，iftheyhadnotmadesuchamonsterofthatspeciesofdramaticentertainmentasperfectlyshocksme;
andIamamazedhowpeoplecanbeartoseewretchedtragediessettomusic;wherethescenesarecontrivedfornootherpurposethantolugin，asitwerebytheears，threeorfourridiculoussongs，togiveafavoriteactressanopportunityofexhibitingherpipe。LetwhowilldieawayinrapturesatthetrillsofaeunuchquaveringthemajesticpartofCaesarorCato，andstruttinginafoolishmanneruponthestage，butformypartI
havelongagorenouncedthesepaltryentertainments，whichconstitutethegloryofmodernItaly，andaresodearlypurchasedbycrownedheads。\"
Candideopposedthesesentiments;buthediditinadiscreetmanner;asforMartin，hewasentirelyoftheoldsenator’sopinion。
Dinnerbeingservedtheysatdowntotable，and，afteraheartyrepast，returnedtothelibrary。Candide，observingHomerrichlybound，commendedthenobleVenetian’staste。
\"This\"，saidhe，\"isabookthatwasoncethedelightofthegreatPangloss，thebestphilosopherinGermany。\"
\"Homerisnofavoriteofmine\"，answeredPococurante，coolly，\"IwasmadetobelieveoncethatItookapleasureinreadinghim;
buthiscontinualrepetitionsofbattleshaveallsucharesemblancewitheachother;hisgodsthatareforeverinhasteandbustle，withouteverdoinganything;hisHelen，whoisthecauseofthewar，andyethardlyactsinthewholeperformance;
hisTroy，thatholdsoutsolong，withoutbeingtaken：
inshort，allthesethingstogethermakethepoemveryinsipidtome。Ihaveaskedsomelearnedmen，whethertheyarenotinrealityasmuchtiredasmyselfwithreadingthispoet：thosewhospokeingenuously，assuredmethathehadmadethemfallasleep，andyetthattheycouldnotwellavoidgivinghimaplaceintheirlibraries;butthatitwasmerelyastheywoulddoanantique，orthoserustymedalswhicharekeptonlyforcuriosity，andareofnomannerofuseincommerce。\"
\"ButyourexcellencydoesnotsurelyformthesameopinionofVirgil？\"saidCandide。
\"Why，Igrant\"，repliedPococurante，\"thatthesecond，third，fourth，andsixthbooksofhisAeneid，areexcellent;butasforhispiousAeneas，hisstrongCloanthus，hisfriendlyAchates，hisboyAscanius，hissillykingLatinus，hisill-bredAmata，hisinsipidLavinia，andsomeothercharactersmuchinthesamestrain，Ithinktherecannotinnaturebeanythingmoreflatanddisagreeable。ImustconfessIpreferTassofarbeyondhim;nay，eventhatsleepytaletellerAriosto。\"
\"MayItakethelibertytoaskifyoudonotexperiencegreatpleasurefromreadingHorace？\"saidCandide。
\"Therearemaximsinthiswriter\"，repliedPococurante，\"whenceamanoftheworldmayreapsomebenefit;andtheshortmeasureoftheversemakesthemmoreeasilytoberetainedinthememory。ButIseenothingextraordinaryinhisjourneytoBrundusium，andhisaccountofhishaddinner;norinhisdirty，lowquarrelbetweenoneRupillius，whosewords，asheexpressesit，werefullofpoisonousfilth;andanother，whoselanguagewasdippedinvinegar。Hisindelicateversesagainstoldwomenandwitcheshavefrequentlygivenmegreatoffense：norcanIdiscoverthegreatmeritofhistellinghisfriendMaecenas，thatifhewillbutrankhimintheclassoflyricpoets，hisloftyheadshalltouchthestars。Ignorantreadersareapttojudgeawriterbyhisreputation。Formypart，Ireadonlytopleasemyself。I
likenothingbutwhatmakesformypurpose。\"
Candide，whohadbeenbroughtupwithanotionofnevermakinguseofhisownjudgment，wasastonishedatwhatheheard;butMartinfoundtherewasagooddealofreasoninthesenator’sremarks。
\"Oh！hereisaTully\"，saidCandide;\"thisgreatmanI
fancyyouarenevertiredofreading？\"
\"IndeedIneverreadhimatall\"，repliedPococurante。
\"WhatisittomewhetherhepleadsforRabiriusorCluentius？Itrycausesenoughmyself。I
hadoncesomelikingforhisphilosophicalworks;butwhenIfoundhedoubtedeverything，IthoughtIknewasmuchashimself，andhadnoneedofaguidetolearnignorance。\"
\"Ha！\"criedMartin，\"herearefourscorevolumesofthememoirsoftheAcademyofSciences;perhapstheremaybesomethingcuriousandvaluableinthiscollection。\"
\"Yes\"，answeredPococurante，\"sotheremightifanyoneofthesecompilersofthisrubbishhadonlyinventedtheartofpin-making;
butallthesevolumesarefilledwithmerechimericalsystems，withoutonesinglearticleconductivetorealutility。\"
\"Iseeaprodigiousnumberofplays\"，saidCandide，\"inItalian，Spanish，andFrench。\"
\"Yes\"，repliedtheVenetian，\"thereareIthinkthreethousand，andnotthreedozenofthemgoodforanything。Astothosehugevolumesofdivinity，andthoseenormouscollectionsofsermons，theyarenotalltogetherworthonesinglepageinSeneca;andIfancyyouwillreadilybelievethatneithermyself，noranyoneelse，everlooksintothem。\"
Martin，perceivingsomeshelvesfilledwithEnglishbooks，saidtothesenator，\"Ifancythatarepublicanmustbehighlydelightedwiththosebooks，whicharemostofthemwrittenwithanoblespiritoffreedom。\"
\"Itisnobletowriteaswethink\"，saidPococurante;\"itistheprivilegeofhumanity。ThroughoutItalywewriteonlywhatwedonotthink;andthepresentinhabitantsofthecountryoftheCaesarsandAntoninesdarenotacquireasingleideawithoutthepermissionofaDominicanfather。IshouldbeenamoredofthespiritoftheEnglishnation，diditnotutterlyfrustratethegoodeffectsitwouldproducebypassionandthespiritofparty。\"
Candide，seeingaMilton，askedthesenatorifhedidnotthinkthatauthoragreatman。
\"Who？\"saidPococurantesharply;\"thatbarbarianwhowritesatediouscommentaryintenbooksofrumblingverse，onthefirstchapterofGenesis？
thatslovenlyimitatoroftheGreeks，whodisfiguresthecreation，bymakingtheMessiahtakeapairofcompassesfromHeaven’sarmorytoplantheworld;whereasMosesrepresentedtheDietyasproducingthewholeuniversebyhisfiat？CanIthinkyouhaveanyesteemforawriterwhohasspoiledTasso’sHellandtheDevil;whotransformsLucifersometimesintoatoad，andatothersintoapygmy;whomakeshimsaythesamethingoveragainahundredtimes;whometamorphoseshimintoaschool-divine;
andwho，byanabsurdlyseriousimitationofAriosto’scomicinventionoffirearms，representsthedevilsandangelscannonadingeachotherinHeaven？NeitherInoranyotherItaliancanpossiblytakepleasureinsuchmelancholyreveries;butthemarriageofSinandDeath，andsnakesissuingfromthewomboftheformer，areenoughtomakeanypersonsickthatisnotlosttoallsenseofdelicacy。Thisobscene，whimsical，anddisagreeablepoemmetwiththeneglectitdeservedatitsfirstpublication;
andIonlytreattheauthornowashewastreatedinhisowncountrybyhiscontemporaries。\"
Candidewassensiblygrievedatthisspeech，ashehadagreatrespectforHomer，andwasfondofMilton。
\"Alas！\"saidhesoftlytoMartin，\"IamafraidthismanholdsourGermanpoetsingreatcontempt。\"
\"Therewouldbenosuchgreatharminthat\"，saidMartin。
\"Owhatasurprisingman！\"saidCandide，stilltohimself;
\"whataprodigiousgeniusisthisPococurante！nothingcanpleasehim。\"
Afterfinishingtheirsurveyofthelibrary，theywentdownintothegarden，whenCandidecommendedtheseveralbeautiesthatofferedthemselvestohisview。
\"Iknownothinguponearthlaidoutinsuchhadtaste\"，saidPococurante;
\"everythingaboutitischildishandtrifling;butIshallhaveanotherlaidouttomorrowuponanoblerplan。\"
AssoonasourtwotravelershadtakenleaveofHisExcellency，CandidesaidtoMartin，\"Well，Ihopeyouwillownthatthismanisthehappiestofallmortals，forheisaboveeverythinghepossesses。\"
\"Butdonotyousee\"，answeredMartin，\"thathelikewisedislikeseverythinghepossesses？ItwasanobservationofPlato，longsince，thatthosearenotthebeststomachsthatreject，withoutdistinction，allsortsofaliments。\"
\"True\"，saidCandide，\"butstilltheremustcertainlybeapleasureincriticisingeverything，andinperceivingfaultswhereothersthinktheyseebeauties。\"
\"Thatis\"，repliedMartin，\"thereisapleasureinhavingnopleasure。\"
\"Well，well\"，saidCandide，\"IfindthatIshallbetheonlyhappymanatlast，whenIamblessedwiththesightofmydearCunegonde。\"
\"Itisgoodtohope\"，saidMartin。
Inthemeanwhile，daysandweekspassedaway，andnonewsofCacambo。
Candidewassooverwhelmedwithgrief，thathedidnotreflectonthebehaviorofPacquetteandFriarGiroflee，whoneverstayedtoreturnhimthanksforthepresentshehadsogenerouslymadethem。
chapter26CHAPTERXXVI
CANDIDEANDMARTINSUPWITHSIXSHARPERS。WHO
THEYWERE
OneeveningasCandide，withhisattendantMartin，wasgoingtositdowntosupperwithsomeforeignerswholodgedinthesameinnwheretheyhadtakenuptheirquarters，amanwithafacethecolorofsootcamebehindhim，andtakinghimbythearm，said，\"Holdyourselfinreadinesstogoalongwithus;besureyoudonotfail。\"
Uponthis，turningabouttoseefromwhomthesewordscame，hebeheldCacambo。NothingbutthesightofMissCunegondecouldhavegivenhimgreaterjoyandsurprise。Hewasalmostbesidehimself，andembracedthisdearfriend。
\"Cunegonde！\"saidhe，\"Cunegondeiscomewithyoudoubtless！
Where，whereisshe？Carrymetoherthisinstant，thatImaydiewithjoyinherpresence。\"
\"Cunegondeisnothere\"，answeredCacambo;\"sheisinConstantinople。\"
\"Goodheavens！inConstantinople！butnomatterifshewereinChina，I
wouldflythither。Quick，quick，dearCacambo，letusbegone。\"
\"Softandfair\"，saidCacambo，\"staytillyouhavesupped。
Icannotatpresentstaytosayanythingmoretoyou;Iamaslave，andmymasterwaitsforme;Imustgoandattendhimattable：butmum！saynotaword，onlygetyoursupper，andholdyourselfinreadiness。\"
Candide，dividedbetweenjoyandgrief，charmedtohavethusmetwithhisfaithfulagentagain，andsurprisedtohearhewasaslave，hisheartpalpitating，hissensesconfused，butfullofthehopesofrecoveringhisdearCunegonde，satdowntotablewithMartin，whobeheldallthesesceneswithgreatunconcern，andwithsixstrangers，whohadcometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。
Cacambowaitedattableupononeofthosestrangers。Whensupperwasnearlyover，hedrewneartohismaster，andwhisperedinhisear：
\"Sire，YourMajestymaygowhenyouplease;theshipisready\";andsosayinghelefttheroom。
Theguests，surprisedatwhattheyhadheard，lookedateachotherwithoutspeakingaword;whenanotherservantdrawingneartohismaster，inlikemannersaid，\"Sire，YourMajesty’spost-chaiseisatPadua，andthebarkisready。\"Themastermadehimasign，andheinstantlywithdrew。
Thecompanyallstaredateachotheragain，andthegeneralastonishmentwasincreased。Athirdservantthenapproachedanotherofthestrangers，andsaid，\"Sire，ifYourMajestywillbeadvisedbyme，youwillnotmakeanylongerstayinthisplace;Iwillgoandgeteverythingready\";andinstantlydisappeared。
CandideandMartinthentookitforgrantedthatthiswassomeofthediversionsoftheCarnival，andthatthesewerecharactersinmasquerade。
Thenafourthdomesticsaidtothefourthstranger，\"YourMajestymaysetoffwhenyouplease\";sayingwhich，hewentawayliketherest。Afifthvaletsaidthesametoafifthmaster。Butthesixthdomesticspokeinadifferentstyletothepersononwhomhewaited，andwhosatneartoCandide。
\"Troth，sir\"，saidhe，\"theywilltrustYourMajestynolonger，normyselfneither;andwemaybothofuschancetobesenttojailthisverynight;andthereforeIshalltakecareofmyself，andsoadieu。\"
Theservantsbeingallgone，thesixstrangers，withCandideandMartin，remainedinaprofoundsilence。AtlengthCandidebrokeitbysaying：
\"Gentlemen，thisisaverysingularjokeuponmyword;
howcameyoualltobekings？FormypartIownfrankly，thatneithermyfriendMartinhere，normyself，haveanyclaimtoroyalty。\"
Cacambo’smasterthenbegan，withgreatgravity，todeliverhimselfthusinItalian：
\"Iamnotjokingintheleast，mynameisAchmetIII。I
wasGrandSultanformanyyears;Idethronedmybrother，mynephewdethronedme，myvizierslosttheirheads，andIamcondemnedtoendmydaysintheoldseraglio。
Mynephew，theGrandSultanMahomet，givesmepermissiontotravelsometimesformyhealth，andIamcometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。\"
AyoungmanwhosatbyAchmet，spokenext，andsaid：
\"MynameisIvan。IwasonceEmperorofalltheRussians，butwasdethronedinmycradle。Myparentswereconfined，andIwasbroughtupinaprison，yetIamsometimesallowedtotravel，thoughalwayswithpersonstokeepaguardoverme，andIcometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。\"
Thethirdsaid：
\"IamCharlesEdward，KingofEngland;myfatherhasrenouncedhisrighttothethroneinmyfavor。Ihavefoughtindefenseofmyrights，andnearathousandofmyfriendshavehadtheirheartstakenoutoftheirbodiesaliveandthrownintheirfaces。Ihavemyselfbeenconfinedinaprison。IamgoingtoRometovisittheKing，myfather，whowasdethronedaswellasmyself;andmygrandfatherandIhavecometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。\"
Thefourthspokethus：
\"IamtheKingofPoland;thefortuneofwarhasstrippedmeofmyhereditarydominions。Myfatherexperiencedthesamevicissitudesoffate。I
resignmyselftothewillofProvidence，inthesamemannerasSultanAchmet，theEmperorIvan，andKingCharlesEdward，whomGodlongpreserve;andIhavecometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。\"
Thefifthsaid：
\"IamKingofPolandalso。Ihavetwicelostmykingdom;
butProvidencehasgivenmeotherdominions，whereIhavedonemoregoodthanalltheSarmatiankingsputtogetherwereeverabletodoonthebanksoftheVistula;IresignmyselflikewisetoProvidence;andhavecometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。\"
Itnowcametothesixthmonarch’sturntospeak。\"Gentlemen\"，saidhe，\"I
amnotsogreataprinceastherestofyou，itistrue，butIam，however，acrownedhead。IamTheodore，electedKingofCorsica。
IhavehadthetitleofMajesty，andamnowhardlytreatedwithcommoncivility。
Ihavecoinedmoney，andamnotnowworthasingleducat。Ihavehadtwosecretaries，andamnowwithoutavalet。Iwasonceseatedonathrone，andsincethathavelainuponatrussofstraw，inacommonjailinLondon，andIverymuchfearIshallmeetwiththesamefatehereinVenice，whereIcame，likeYourMajesties，todivertmyselfattheCarnival。\"
TheotherfiveKingslistenedtothisspeechwithgreatattention;itexcitedtheircompassion;eachofthemmadetheunhappyTheodoreapresentoftwentysequins，andCandidegavehimadiamond，worthjustahundredtimesthatsum。
\"Whocanthisprivatepersonbe\"，saidthefiveKingstooneanother，\"whoisabletogive，andhasactuallygiven，ahundredtimesasmuchasanyofus？\"
Justastheyrosefromtable，incamefourSereneHighnesses，whohadalsobeenstrippedoftheirterritoriesbythefortuneofwar，andhadcometospendtheremainderoftheCarnivalatVenice。Candidetooknomannerofnoticeofthem;forhisthoughtswerewhollyemployedonhisvoyagetoConstantinople，whereheintendedtogoinsearchofhislovelyMissCunegonde。
chapter27CHAPTERXXVII
CANDIDE’S
VOYAGETOCONSTANTINOPLE
ThetrustyCacambohadalreadyengagedthecaptainoftheTurkishshipthatwastocarrySultanAchmetbacktoConstantinopletotakeCandideandMartinonboard。Accordinglytheybothembarked，afterpayingtheirobeisancetohismiserableHighness。Astheyweregoingonboard，CandidesaidtoMartin：
\"YouseewesuppedincompanywithsixdethronedKings，andtooneofthemIgavecharity。Perhapstheremaybeagreatmanyotherprincesstillmoreunfortunate。FormypartIhavelostonlyahundredsheep，andamnowgoingtoflytothearmsofmycharmingMissCunegonde。
MydearMartin，Imustinsistonit，thatPanglosswasintheright。Allisforthebest。\"
\"Iwishitmaybe\"，saidMartin。
\"ButthiswasanoddadventurewemetwithatVenice。I
donotthinkthereeverwasaninstancebeforeofsixdethronedmonarchssuppingtogetheratapublicinn。\"
\"Thisisnotmoreextraordinary\"，saidMartin，\"thanmostofwhathashappenedtous。Itisaverycommonthingforkingstobedethroned;andasforourhavingthehonortosupwithsixofthem，itisamereaccident，notdeservingourattention。\"
AssoonasCandidesethisfootonboardthevessel，heflewtohisoldfriendandvaletCacamboand，throwinghisarmsabouthisneck，embracedhimwithtransportsofjoy。
\"Well\"，saidhe，\"whatnewsofMissCunegonde？Doesshestillcontinuetheparagonofbeauty？Doesshelovemestill？Howdoesshedo？Youhave，doubtless，purchasedasuperbpalaceforheratConstantinople。\"
\"Mydearmaster\"，repliedCacambo，\"MissCunegondewashesdishesonthebanksofthePropontis，inthehouseofaprincewhohasveryfewtowash。SheisatpresentaslaveinthefamilyofanancientsovereignnamedRagotsky，whomtheGrandTurkallowsthreecrownsadaytomaintainhiminhisexile;butthemostmelancholycircumstanceofallis，thatsheisturnedhorriblyugly。\"
\"Uglyorhandsome\"，saidCandide，\"Iamamanofhonorand，assuch，amobligedtoloveherstill。Buthowcouldshepossiblyhavebeenreducedtosoabjectacondition，whenIsentfiveorsixmillionstoherbyyou？\"
\"Lordblessme\"，saidCacambo，\"wasnotIobligedtogivetwomillionstoSeignorDonFernandod’IbaraayFigueorayMascarenesyLampourdosySouza，theGovernorofBuenosAyres，forlibertytotakeMissCunegondeawaywithme？Andthendidnotabravefellowofapirategallantlystripusofalltherest？AndthendidnotthissamepiratecarryuswithhimtoCapeMatapan，toMilo，toNicaria，toSamos，toPetra，totheDardanelles，toMarmora，toScutari？MissCunegondeandtheoldwomanarenowservantstotheprinceIhavetoldyouof;andImyselfamslavetothedethronedSultan。\"
\"Whatachainofshockingaccidents！\"exclaimedCandide。
\"Butafterall，I
havestillsomediamondsleft，withwhichIcaneasilyprocureMissCunegonde’sliberty。Itisapitythoughsheisgrownsougly。\"
ThenturningtoMartin，\"Whatthinkyou，friend\"，saidhe，\"whoseconditionismosttobepitied，theEmperorAchmet’s，theEmperorIvan’s，KingCharlesEdward’s，ormine？\"
\"Faith，Icannotresolveyourquestion\"，saidMartin，\"unlessIhadbeeninthebreastsofyouall。\"
\"Ah！\"criedCandide，\"wasPanglossherenow，hewouldhaveknown，andsatisfiedmeatonce。\"
\"Iknownot\"，saidMartin，\"inwhatbalanceyourPanglosscouldhaveweighedthemisfortunesofmankind，andhavesetajustestimationontheirsufferings。AllthatIpretendtoknowofthematteristhattherearemillionsofmenontheearth，whoseconditionsareahundredtimesmorepitiablethanthoseofKingCharlesEdward，theEmperorIvan，orSultanAchmet。\"
\"Why，thatmaybe\"，answeredCandide。
InafewdaystheyreachedtheBosphorus;andthefirstthingCandidedidwastopayahighransomforCacambo;then，withoutlosingtime，heandhiscompanionswentonboardagalley，inordertosearchforhisCunegondeonthebanksofthePropontis，notwithstandingshewasgrownsougly。
Thereweretwoslavesamongthecrewofthegalley，whorowedveryill，andtowhosebarebacksthemasterofthevesselfrequentlyappliedalash。
Candide，fromnaturalsympathy，lookedatthesetwoslavesmoreattentivelythanatanyoftherest，anddrewnearthemwithaneyeofpity。Theirfeatures，thoughgreatlydisfigured，appearedtohimtobearastrongresemblancewiththoseofPanglossandtheunhappyBaronJesuit，MissCunegonde’sbrother。Thisideaaffectedhimwithgriefandcompassion：heexaminedthemmoreattentivelythanbefore。
\"Introth\"，saidhe，turningtoMartin，\"ifIhadnotseenmymasterPanglossfairlyhanged，andhadnotmyselfbeenunluckyenoughtoruntheBaronthroughthebody，Ishouldabsolutelythinkthosetworowerswerethemen。\"
NosoonerhadCandideutteredthenamesoftheBaronandPangloss，thanthetwoslavesgaveagreatcry，ceasedrowing，andletfalltheiroarsoutoftheirhands。Themasterofthevessel，seeingthis，ranuptothem，andredoubledthedisciplineofthelash。
\"Hold，hold\"，criedCandide，\"Iwillgiveyouwhatmoneyyoushallaskforthesetwopersons。\"
\"Goodheavens！itisCandide\"，saidoneofthemen。
\"Candide！\"criedtheother。
\"DoIdream\"，saidCandide，\"oramIawake？AmIactuallyonboardthisgalley？IsthisMyLordtheBaron，whomIkilled？andthatmymasterPangloss，whomIsawhangedbeforemyface？\"
\"ItisI！itisI！\"criedtheybothtogether。
\"What！isthisyourgreatphilosopher？\"saidMartin。
\"Mydearsir\"，saidCandidetothemasterofthegalley，\"howmuchdoyouaskfortheransomoftheBaronofThunder-ten-tronckh，whoisoneofthefirstbaronsoftheempire，andofMonsieurPangloss，themostprofoundmetaphysicianinGermany？\"
\"Why，then，Christiancur\"，repliedtheTurkishcaptain，\"sincethesetwodogsofChristianslavesarebaronsandmetaphysicians，whonodoubtareofhighrankintheirowncountry，thoushaltgivemefiftythousandsequins。\"
\"Youshallhavethem，sir;carrymebackasquickasthoughttoConstantinople，andyoushallreceivethemoneyimmediately-No！
carrymefirsttoMissCunegonde。\"
Thecaptain，uponCandide’sfirstproposal，hadalreadytackedabout，andhemadethecrewplytheiroarssoeffectually，thatthevesselflewthroughthewater，quickerthanabirdcleavestheair。
CandidebestowedathousandembracesontheBaronandPangloss。
\"Andsothen，mydearBaron，Ididnotkillyou？andyou，mydearPangloss，arecometolifeagainafteryourhanging？ButhowcameyouslavesonboardaTurkishgalley？\"
\"Andisittruethatmydearsisterisinthiscountry？\"
saidtheBaron。
\"Yes\"，saidCacambo。
\"AnddoIonceagainbeholdmydearCandide？\"saidPangloss。
CandidepresentedMartinandCacambotothem;theyembracedeachother，andallspoketogether。Thegalleyflewlikelightning，andsoontheyweregotbacktoport。CandideinstantlysentforaJew，towhomhesoldforfiftythousandsequinsadiamondrichlyworthonehundredthousand，thoughthefellowsworetohimallthetimebyFatherAbrahamthathegavehimthemosthecouldpossiblyafford。Henosoonergotthemoneyintohishands，thanhepaiditdownfortheransomoftheBaronandPangloss。Thelatterflunghimselfatthefeetofhisdeliverer，andbathedhimwithhistears;
theformerthankedhimwithagraciousnod，andpromisedtoreturnhimthemoneythefirstopportunity。
\"Butisitpossible\"，saidhe，\"thatmysistershouldbeinTurkey？\"
\"Nothingismorepossible\"，answeredCacambo，\"forshescoursthedishesinthehouseofaTransylvanianprince。\"
CandidesentdirectlyfortwoJews，andsoldmorediamondstothem;andthenhesetoutwithhiscompanionsinanothergalley，todeliverMissCunegondefromslavery。
chapter28CHAPTERXXVIII
WHATBEFELLCANDIDE，CUNEGONDE，PANGLOSS，MARTIN，ETC。
Pardon\"，saidCandidetotheBaron;\"oncemoreletmeentreatyourpardon，ReverendFather，forrunningyouthroughthebody。\"
\"Saynomoreaboutit\"，repliedtheBaron。\"IwasalittletoohastyImustown;butasyouseemtobedesiroustoknowbywhataccidentIcametobeaslaveonboardthegalleywhereyousawme，Iwillinformyou。AfterIhadbeencuredofthewoundyougaveme，bytheCollegeapothecary，IwasattackedandcarriedoffbyapartyofSpanishtroops，whoclappedmeinprisoninBuenosAyres，attheverytimemysisterwassettingoutfromthere。IaskedleavetoreturntoRome，tothegeneralofmyOrder，whoappointedmechaplaintotheFrenchAmbassadoratConstantinople。
Ihadnotbeenaweekinmynewoffice，whenIhappenedtomeetoneeveningayoungIcoglan，extremelyhandsomeandwell-made。Theweatherwasveryhot;theyoungmanhadaninclinationtobathe。Itooktheopportunitytobathelikewise。IdidnotknowitwasacrimeforaChristiantobefoundnakedincompanywithayoungTurk。Acadiorderedmetoreceiveahundredblowsonthesolesofmyfeet，andsentmetothegalleys。Idonotbelievethattherewaseveranactofmoreflagrantinjustice。
ButIwouldfainknowhowmysistercametobeasculliontoaTransylvanianprince，whohastakenrefugeamongtheTurks？\"
\"ButhowhappensitthatIbeholdyouagain，mydearPangloss？\"
saidCandide。
\"Itistrue\"，answeredPangloss，\"yousawmehanged，thoughIoughtproperlytohavebeenburned;butyoumayremember，thatitrainedextremelyhardwhentheyweregoingtoroastme。Thestormwassoviolentthattheyfounditimpossibletolightthefire;sotheyhangedmebecausetheycoulddonobetter。Asurgeonpurchasedmybody，carriedithome，andpreparedtodissectme。Hebeganbymakingacrucialincisionfrommynaveltotheclavicle。ItisimpossibleforanyonetohavebeenmorelamelyhangedthanIhadbeen。Theexecutionerwasasubdeacon，andknewhowtoburnpeopleverywell，butasforhanging，hewasanoviceatit，beingquiteoutofpractice;thecordbeingwet，andnotslippingproperly，thenoosedidnotjoin。Inshort，Istillcontinuedtobreathe;
thecrucialincisionmademescreamtosuchadegree，thatmysurgeonfellflatuponhisback;
andimaginingitwastheDevilhewasdissecting，ranaway，andinhisfrighttumbleddownstairs。Hiswifehearingthenoise，flewfromthenextroom，andseeingmestretcheduponthetablewithmycrucialincision，wasstillmoreterrifiedthanherhusband，andfelluponhim。Whentheyhadalittlerecoveredthemselves，Iheardhersaytoherhusband，’Mydear，howcouldyouthinkofdissectingaheretic？Don’tyouknowthattheDevilisalwaysinthem？I’llrundirectlytoapriesttocomeanddrivetheevilspiritout。’I
trembledfromheadtofootathearinghertalkinthismanner，andexertedwhatlittlestrengthIhadlefttocryout，’Havemercyonme！’AtlengththePortuguesebarbertookcourage，sewedupmywound，andhiswifenursedme;andIwasuponmylegsinafortnight’stime。ThebarbergotmeaplacetobelackeytoaKnightofMalta，whowasgoingtoVenice;
butfindingmymasterhadnomoneytopaymemywages，IenteredintotheserviceofaVenetianmerchantandwentwithhimtoConstantinople。
\"OnedayIhappenedtoenteramosque，whereIsawnoonebutanoldmanandaveryprettyyoungfemaledevotee，whowastellingherbeads;herneckwasquitebare，andinherbosomshehadabeautifulnosegayoftulips，roses，anemones，ranunculuses，hyacinths，andauriculas;sheletfallhernosegay。Iranimmediatelytotakeitup，andpresentedittoherwithamostrespectfulbow。Iwassolongindeliveringitthatthemanbegantobeangry;and，perceivingIwasaChristian，hecriedoutforhelp;theycarriedmebeforethecadi，whoorderedmetoreceiveonehundredbastinadoes，andsentmetothegalleys。IwaschainedintheverygalleyandtotheverysamebenchwiththeBaron。OnboardthisgalleytherewerefouryoungmenbelongingtoMarseilles，fiveNeapolitanpriests，andtwomonksofCorfu，whotoldusthatthelikeadventureshappenedeveryday。TheBaronpretendedthathehadbeenworseusedthanmyself;andIinsistedthattherewasfarlessharmintakingupanosegay，andputtingitintoawoman’sbosom，thantobefoundstarknakedwithayoungIcoglan。Wewerecontinuallywhipped，andreceivedtwentylashesadaywithaheavythong，whentheconcatenationofsublunaryeventsbroughtyouonboardourgalleytoransomusfromslavery。\"
\"Well，mydearPangloss\"，saidCandidetohim，\"whenYouwerehanged，dissected，whipped，andtuggingattheoar，didyoucontinuetothinkthateverythinginthisworldhappensforthebest？\"
\"Ihavealwaysabidedbymyfirstopinion\"，answeredPangloss;
\"for，afterall，Iamaphilosopher，anditwouldnotbecomemetoretractmysentiments;especiallyasLeibnitzcouldnotbeinthewrong：andthatpreestablishedharmonyisthefinestthingintheworld，aswellasaplenumandthemateriasubtilis。\"
chapter29CHAPTERXXIX
INWHATMANNERCANDIDEFOUNDMISSCUNEGONDE
ANDTHEOLDWOMANAGAIN
WhileCandide，theBaron，Pangloss，Martin，andCacambo，wererelatingtheirseveraladventures，andreasoningonthecontingentornoncontingenteventsofthisworld;oncausesandeffects;onmoralandphysicalevil;onfreewillandnecessity;andontheconsolationthatmaybefeltbyapersonwhenaslaveandchainedtoanoarinaTurkishgalley，theyarrivedatthehouseoftheTransylvanianprinceontheshoresofthePropontis。Thefirstobjectstheybeheldthere，wereMissCunegondeandtheoldwoman，whowerehangingsometableclothsonalinetodry。
TheBaronturnedpaleatthesight。EventhetenderCandide，thataffectionatelover，uponseeinghisfairCunegondeallsunburned，withblearyeyes，awitheredneck，wrinkledfaceandarms，allcoveredwitharedscurf，startedbackwithhorror;but，notwithstanding，recoveringhimself，headvancedtowardsheroutofgoodmanners。SheembracedCandideandherbrother;theyembracedtheoldwoman，andCandideransomedthemboth。
TherewasasmallfarmintheneighborhoodwhichtheoldwomanproposedtoCandidetomakeshiftwithtillthecompanyshouldmeetwithamorefavorabledestiny。Cunegonde，notknowingthatshewasgrownugly，asnoonehadinformedherofit，remindedCandideofhispromiseinsoperemptoryamanner，thatthesimpleladdidnotdaretorefuseher;hethenacquaintedtheBaronthathewasgoingtomarryhissister。
\"Iwillneversuffer\"，saidtheBaron，\"mysistertobeguiltyofanactionsoderogatorytoherbirthandfamily;norwillIbearthisinsolenceonyourpart。No，IneverwillbereproachedthatmynephewsarenotqualifiedforthefirstecclesiasticaldignitiesinGermany;norshallasisterofmineeverbethewifeofanypersonbelowtherankofBaronoftheEmpire。\"
Cunegondeflungherselfatherbrother’sfeet，andbedewedthemwithhertears;buthestillcontinuedinflexible。
\"Thoufoolishfellow，saidCandide，\"haveInotdeliveredtheefromthegalleys，paidthyransom，andthysister’s，too，whowasascullion，andisveryugly，andyetcondescendtomarryher？andshaltthoupretendtoopposethematch！IfIweretolistenonlytothedictatesofmyanger，I
shouldkilltheeagain。\"
\"Thoumayestkillmeagain\"，saidtheBaron;\"butthoushaltnotmarrymysisterwhileIamliving。\"
chapter30CHAPTERXXX
CONCLUSION
Candidehad，intruth，nogreatinclinationtomarryMissCunegonde;buttheextremeimpertinenceoftheBarondeterminedhimtoconcludethematch;
andCunegondepressedhimsowarmly，thathecouldnotrecant。HeconsultedPangloss，Martin，andthefaithfulCacambo。
Panglosscomposedafinememorial，bywhichheprovedthattheBaronhadnorightoverhissister;andthatshemight，accordingtoallthelawsoftheEmpire，marryCandidewiththelefthand。MartinconcludedtothrowtheBaronintothesea;CacambodecidedthathemustbedeliveredtotheTurkishcaptainandsenttothegalleys;afterwhichheshouldbeconveyedbythefirstshiptotheFatherGeneralatRome。Thisadvicewasfoundtobegood;theoldwomanapprovedofit，andnotasyllablewassaidtohissister;thebusinesswasexecutedforalittlemoney;andtheyhadthepleasureoftrickingaJesuit，andpunishingtheprideofaGermanbaron。
Itwasaltogethernaturaltoimagine，thatafterundergoingsomanydisasters，Candide，marriedtohismistressandlivingwiththephilosopherPangloss，thephilosopherMartin，theprudentCacambo，andtheoldwoman，havingbesidesbroughthomesomanydiamondsfromthecountryoftheancientIncas，wouldleadthemostagreeablelifeintheworld。ButhehadbeensorobbedbytheJews，thathehadnothingleftbuthislittlefarm;
hiswife，everydaygrowingmoreandmoreugly，becameheadstrongandinsupportable;theoldwomanwasinfirm，andmoreill-naturedyetthanCunegonde。Cacambo，whoworkedinthegarden，andcarriedtheproduceofittosellinConstantinople，wasabovehislabor，andcursedhisfate。
PanglossdespairedofmakingafigureinanyoftheGermanuniversities。
AndastoMartin，hewasfirmlypersuadedthatapersonisequallyill-situatedeverywhere。Hetookthingswithpatience。
Candide，Martin，andPanglossdisputedsometimesaboutmetaphysicsandmorality。Boatswereoftenseenpassingunderthewindowsofthefarmladenwitheffendis，bashaws，andcadis，thatweregoingintobanishmenttoLemnos，MytileneandErzerum。Andothercadis，bashaws，andeffendiswereseencomingbacktosucceedtheplaceoftheexiles，andweredrivenoutintheirturns。Theysawseveralheadscuriouslystuckuponpoles，andcarriedaspresentstotheSublimePorte。Suchsightsgaveoccasiontofrequentdissertations;andwhennodisputeswereinprogress，theirksomenesswassoexcessivethattheoldwomanventuredonedaytotellthem：
\"Iwouldbegladtoknowwhichisworst，toberavishedahundredtimesbyNegropirates，tohaveonebuttockcutoff，torunthegauntletamongtheBulgarians，tobewhippedandhangedatanauto-da-fe，tobedissected，tobechainedtoanoarinagalley;and，inshort，toexperienceallthemiseriesthroughwhicheveryoneofushathpassed，ortoremainheredoingnothing？\"
\"This\"，saidCandide，\"isagrandquestion。\"
Thisdiscoursegavebirthtonewreflections，andMartinespeciallyconcludedthatmanwasborntoliveintheconvulsionsofdisquiet，orinthelethargyofidleness。ThoughCandidedidnotabsolutelyagreetothis，yethedidnotdetermineanythingonthathead。Panglossavowedthathehadundergonedreadfulsufferings;buthavingoncemaintainedthateverythingwentonaswellaspossible，hestillmaintainedit，andatthesametimebelievednothingofit。
TherewasonethingwhichmorethaneverconfirmedMartininhisdetestableprinciples，madeCandidehesitate，andembarrassedPangloss，whichwasthearrivalofPacquetteandBrotherGirofleeonedayattheirfarm。Thiscouplehadbeenintheutmostdistress;theyhadveryspeedilymadeawaywiththeirthreethousandpiastres;theyhadparted，beenreconciled;quarreledagain，beenthrownintoprison;
hadmadetheirescape，andatlastBrotherGirofleehadturnedTurk。
Pacquettestillcontinuedtofollowhertrade;butshegotlittleornothingbyit。
\"Iforesawverywell\"，saidMartintoCandide\"thatyourpresentswouldsoonbesquandered，andonlymakethemmoremiserable。YouandCacambohavespentmillionsofpiastres，andyetyouarenotmorehappythanBrotherGirofleeandPacquette。\"
\"Ah！\"saidPanglosstoPacquette，\"itisHeaventhathasbroughtyouhereamongus，mypoorchild！Doyouknowthatyouhavecostmethetipofmynose，oneeye，andoneear？Whatahandsomeshapeishere！
andwhatisthisworld！\"
Thisnewadventureengagedthemmoredeeplythaneverinphilosophicaldisputations。
IntheneighborhoodlivedafamousdervishwhopassedforthebestphilosopherinTurkey;theywenttoconsulthim：Pangloss，whowastheirspokesman，addressedhimthus：
\"Master，wecometoentreatyoutotelluswhysostrangeananimalasmanhasbeenformed？\"
\"Whydoyoutroubleyourheadaboutit？\"saidthedervish;
\"isitanybusinessofyours？\"
\"But，ReverendFather\"，saidCandide，\"thereisahorribledealofevilontheearth。\"
\"Whatsignifiesit\"，saidthedervish，\"whetherthereisevilorgood？WhenHisHighnesssendsashiptoEgyptdoeshetroublehisheadwhethertheratsinthevesselareattheireaseornot？\"
\"Whatmustthenbedone？\"saidPangloss。
\"Besilent\"，answeredthedervish。
\"Iflatteredmyself\"，repliedPangloss，\"tohavereasonedalittlewithyouonthecausesandeffects，onthebestofpossibleworlds，theoriginofevil，thenatureofthesoul，andapre-establishedharmony。\"
Atthesewordsthedervishshutthedoorintheirfaces。
Duringthisconversation，newswasspreadabroadthattwoviziersofthebenchandthemuftihadjustbeenstrangledatConstantinople，andseveraloftheirfriendsimpaled。Thiscatastrophemadeagreatnoiseforsomehours。Pangloss，Candide，andMartin，astheywerereturningtothelittlefarm，metwithagood-lookingoldman，whowastakingtheairathisdoor，underanalcoveformedoftheboughsoforangetrees。
Pangloss，whowasasinquisitiveashewasdisputative，askedhimwhatwasthenameofthemuftiwhowaslatelystrangled。
\"Icannottell\"，answeredthegoodoldman;\"Ineverknewthenameofanymufti，orvizierbreathing。Iamentirelyignorantoftheeventyouspeakof;I
presumethatingeneralsuchasareconcernedinpublicaffairssometimescometoamiserableend;andthattheydeserveit：butIneverinquirewhatisdoingatConstantinople;Iamcontentedwithsendingthithertheproduceofmygarden，whichIcultivatewithmyownhands。\"
Aftersayingthesewords，heinvitedthestrangerstocomeintohishouse。
Histwodaughtersandtwosonspresentedthemwithdiverssortsofsherbetoftheirownmaking;besidescaymac，heightenedwiththepeelsofcandiedcitrons，oranges，lemons，pineapples，pistachionuts，andMochacoffeeunadulteratedwiththebadcoffeeofBataviaortheAmericanislands。AfterwhichthetwodaughtersofthisgoodMussulmanperfumedthebeardsofCandide，Pangloss，andMartin。
\"Youmustcertainlyhaveavastestate\"，saidCandidetotheTurk。
\"Ihavenomorethantwentyacresofground\"，hereplied，\"thewholeofwhichIcultivatemyselfwiththehelpofmychildren;
andourlaborkeepsofffromusthreegreatevils-idleness，vice，andwant。\"
Candide，ashewasreturninghome，madeprofoundreflectionsontheTurk’sdiscourse。
\"Thisgoodoldman\"，saidhetoPanglossandMartin，\"appearstometohavechosenforhimselfalotmuchpreferabletothatofthesixKingswithwhomwehadthehonortosup。\"
\"Humangrandeur\"，saidPangloss，\"isverydangerous，ifwebelievethetestimoniesofalmostallphilosophers;forwefindEglon，KingofMoab，wasassassinatedbyAod;Absalomwashangedbythehairofhishead，andrunthroughwiththreedarts;KingNadab，sonofJeroboam，wasslainbyBaaza;KingElabyZimri;OkosiasbyJehu;AthaliahbyJehoiada;theKingsJehooiakim，Jeconiah，andZedekiah，wereledintocaptivity：IneednottellyouwhatwasthefateofCroesus，Astyages，Darius，DionysiusofSyracuse，Pyrrhus，Perseus，Hannibal，Jugurtha，Ariovistus，Caesar，Pompey，Nero，Otho，Vitellius，Domitian，RichardIIofEngland，EdwardII，HenryVI，RichardIll，MaryStuart，CharlesI，thethreeHenrysofFrance，andtheEmperorHenryIV。\"
\"Neitherneedyoutellme\"，saidCandide，\"thatwemusttakecareofourgarden。\"
\"Youareintheright\"，saidPangloss;\"forwhenmanwasputintothegardenofEden，itwaswithanintenttodressit;andthisprovesthatmanwasnotborntobeidle。\"
\"Workthenwithoutdisputing\"，saidMartin;\"itistheonlywaytorenderlifesupportable。\"
Thelittlesociety，oneandall，enteredintothislaudabledesignandsetthemselvestoexerttheirdifferenttalents。Thelittlepieceofgroundyieldedthemaplentifulcrop。Cunegondeindeedwasveryugly，butshebecameanexcellenthandatpastrywork：Pacquetteembroidered;theoldwomanhadthecareofthelinen。Therewasnone，downtoBrotherGiroflee，butdidsomeservice;hewasaverygoodcarpenter，andbecameanhonestman。
PanglossusednowandthentosaytoCandide：
\"Thereisaconcatenationofalleventsinthebestofpossibleworlds;for，inshort，hadyounotbeenkickedoutofafinecastlefortheloveofMissCunegonde;hadyounotbeenputintotheInquisition;
hadyounottraveledoverAmericaonfoot;hadyounotruntheBaronthroughthebody;andhadyounotlostallyoursheep，whichyoubroughtfromthegoodcountryofElDorado，youwouldnothavebeenheretoeatpreservedcitronsandpistachionuts。\"
\"Excellentlyobserved\"，answeredCandide;\"butwemustcultivateourgarden。\"