\"No,itgotme。Thetidecamein,andthesealbeat。\"
\"Iamgladofthat。\"
\"Thankyou。\"
\"Whatdidyouwantwithit?\"
\"Idon’tthinkIwanteditatall。Atanyrate,that’swhatIalwayssaid。Ishallhavetoaskyoutositonthisside,\"headded,looseningthesheetandpreparingtoshiftthesail。\"Thewindhasbackedroundalittlemoretothesouth,andit’sgettinglighter。\"
\"Ifit’sgoingdownweshallbelate,\"shesaid,withanintimationofapprehension。
\"WeshallbeatLeydenontime。Ifthewindfallsthen,Icangetahorseatthestableandhaveyoudrivenback。\"
\"Well。\"
Hekeptscanningthesky。Then,\"Didyoueverhearthemwhistleforawind?\"heasked。
\"No。Whatisitlike?\"
\"WhenAdamsdoesit,it’slikethis。\"Heputonafurtivelook,andglancedonceortwiceatheraskance。\"Well!\"hesaidwiththereproductionofastrongnasal,\"ofcourseIdon’tbelievethere’sanythinginit。Ofcourseit’sallfoolishness。Nowyoumusturgemealittle,\"headded,inhisownmanner。
\"Oh,byallmeansgoon,Mr。Adams,\"shecried,withalaugh。
Herolledhisheadagaintoonesidesheepishly。
\"Well,Idon’tpresumeitDOEShaveanythingtodowiththewind——well,I
don’tPRESUMEitdoes。\"Hewassilentlongenoughtowhetanimaginedexpectation;thenhesethisfacetowardsthesky,andbeganasoft,low,coaxingsibilationbetweenhisteeth。\"S-s-s-s;s-s-s-s-s-s!Well,itdon’tstandtoreasonitcanbringthewind——S-s-s-s-s-s-s;s-s-s-s。
Why,ofcourseit’sallfoolishness。S-s-s-s。\"Hecontinuedtoemitthesesibilants,interspersingthemwithAdams’sprotests。Suddenlythesailpulledtheloosesheettautandtheboatleapedforwardoverthewater。
\"Wonderful!\"criedthegirl。
\"That’swhatIsaidtoAdams,orwordstothateffect。ButIthoughtweshouldgetitfromthelookoftheskybeforeIproposedtowhistleforit。Now,then,\"hecontinued,\"Iwillbeserious,ifyoulike。\"
\"Serious?\"
\"Yes。Didn’tyouaskmetobeseriousjustbeforethosesealsinterruptedyou?\"
\"Oh!\"sheexclaimed,coloringalittle。\"Idon’tthinkwecangobacktothat,now。\"Hedidnotinsist,andshesaidpresently,\"Ithoughtthesailorshadasuperstitionaboutshipsthatareluckyandunlucky。Butyou’vekeptyourboat\"
\"Ikeptherforluck:thelightningneverstrikestwiceinthesameplace。AndIneversawaboatthatbehavedsowell。\"
\"Doyoucallitbehavingwelltotipover?\"
\"Shebehavedwellbeforethat。Shedidn’ttipoveroutsidethereef\"
\"Itcertainlygoesverysmoothly,\"saidthegirl。Shehadinvainrecurredtothetragicmotiveofhercoming;shecouldnotreviveit;
therehadbeennothinglikeexpiationinthiseventlessvoyage;ithadbeenapleasureandnopenance。Sheabandonedherselfwithaweakluxurytotherespitefromsufferingandanxiety;shemadeherselfthegoodcomradeoftheyoungmanwhomperhapssheeventemptedtoflatterherfartherandfartheroutofthedrearinessinwhichshehaddwelt;andifanywofulcurrentoffeelingsweptbeneath,shewouldnotfathomit,butresolutelyfloated,asonemayatsuchtimes,onthesurface。Theylaughedtogetherandjested;theytalkedinthegayidlenessofsuchraremoods。
Theypassedayachtatanchor,andayoungfellowinawhiteduckcap,leaningovertherail,salutedLibbywiththesignificantgravitywhichoneyoungmanusestowardsanotherwhomheseesinasail-boatwithaprettygirl。
Shelaughedatthis。\"Doyouknowyourfriend?\"sheasked。
\"Yes。ThistimeIdo?\"
\"Hefanciesyouaretakingsomeyoungladyasail。WhatwouldhesayifyouweretostopandintroducemetohimasDr。Breen?\"
\"Oh,heknowswhoyouare。It’sJohnson。\"
\"Theonewhoseclothesyoucameoverin,thatmorning?\"
\"Yes。Isupposeyoulaughedatme。\"
\"Ilikedyourhavingthecouragetodoit。Buthowdoesheknowme?\"
\"I——Idescribedyou。He’sratheranoldfriend。\"Thisalsoamusedher。
\"Ishouldliketohearhowyoudescribedme。\"
\"Iwilltellyousometime。Itwasanelaboratedescription。Icouldn’tgetthroughwithitnowbeforewelanded。\"
Theoldtownhadcomeoutofthehazeofthedistance,——astragglingvillageofweather-beatenwoodandweather-beatenwhitepaint,picturesque,butnolongeravisionofgraystoneandpalemarble。A
coal-yard,andabricklocomotivehouse,andramblingrailroadshedsstretchedalongthewater-front。Theyfoundtheirwayeasilyenoughthroughthesparseshippingtothestepsattheendofthewoodenpier,whereLibbydroppedthesailandmadehisboatfast。
Alittlepleasantgiddiness,asifthelightnessofherhearthadmountedtoherhead,madehergladofhisarmupthesestepsandupthewharf;
andshekeptitastheyclimbedtheslopingelm-shadedvillagestreettothemainthoroughfare,withitsbricksidewalks,itsshopsandawnings,anditscheerfulstirandtraffic。
Thetelegraphofficefrontedtheheadofthestreetwhichtheyhadascended。\"Youcansithereintheapothecary’stillIcomedown,\"hesaid。
\"Doyouthinkthatwillbeprofessionallyappropriate?Iamonlyanursenow。\"
\"No,Iwasn’tthinkingofthat。ButIsawachairinthere。Andwecanmakeapretenseofwantingsomesoda。Itistheproperthingtotreatyoungladiestosodawhenonebringstheminfromthecountry。\"
\"Itdoeshavethatappearance,\"sheassented,withasmile。Shekepthimwaitingwithwhatwouldhavelookedlikecoquettishhesitationinanother,whilesheglancedatthewindowsoverhead,piercedbyaskeinofconvergingwires。\"SupposeIgoupwithyou?\"
\"Ishouldlikethatbetter,\"hesaid;andshefollowedhimlightlyupthestairsthatledtothetelegraphoffice。Ayoungmanstoodatthemachinewithacigarinhismouth,andhiseyesintentupontheribbonofpaperunreelingitselfbeforehim。
\"Justholdon,\"hesaidtoLibby,withoutturninghishead。\"I’vegotsomethinghereforyou。\"Heread:\"Despatchreceivedyesterday。Comingrightthrough。GeorgeMaynard。\"
\"Good!\"criedLibby。
\"DatedCouncilBluffs。Wantitwrittenout?\"
\"No。What’stopay?\"`
\"Paid,\"saidtheoperator。
Thelaconicallytransactedbusinessendedwiththis,thewirebegantocluckagainliketheanxioushenwhosemannerthemostawfulandmysteriousoftheelementsassumesinbecomingarticulate,andnothingremainedforthembuttocomeaway。
\"ThatwaswhatIwasafraidof,\"saidLibby。\"Maynardwasathisranch,anditmusthavebeenagoodwayout。They’refiftyorsixtymilesout,sometimes。Thatwouldaccountforthedelay。Well,Mrs。Maynarddoesn’tknowhowlongittakestocomefromCheyenne,andwecantellherhe’sontheway,andhastelegraphed。\"Theywerewalkingrapidlydownthestreettothewharfwherehisboatlay。\"Oh!\"heexclaimed,haltingabruptly。
\"Ipromisedtosendyoubackbyland,ifyoupreferred。\"
\"Hasthewindfallen?\"
\"Oh,no。Weshallhaveagoodbreeze:\"
\"Iwon’tputyoutothetroubleofgettingahorse。Icangobackperfectlywellintheboat。\"
\"Well,that’swhatIthink,\"hesaidcheerily。
Shedidnotrespond,andhecouldnotbeawarethatanychangehadcomeoverhermood。Butwhentheywereoncemoreseatedintheboat,andthesailwaspullinginthefreshbreeze,sheturnedtohimwithascarcelyconcealedindignation。\"Haveyouafancyforexperimentinguponpeople,Mr。Libby?\"
\"Experimenting?I?Idon’tknowintheleastwhatyoumean!\"
\"Whydidyoutellmethattheoperatorwasawoman?\"
\"Becausetheotheroperatoris,\"heanswered。
\"Oh!\"shesaid,andfellblanklysilent。
\"Thereisagooddealofbusinessthere。Theyhavetohavetwooperators,\"heexplained,afterapause。
\"Why,ofcourse,\"shemurmuredindeephumiliation。Ifhehadsufferedhertobesilentaslongasshewould,shemighthaveofferedhimsomereparation;buthespoke。
\"WhydidyouthinkIhadbeenexperimentingonyou?\"heasked。
\"Why?\"sherepeated。Thesenseofhavingputherselfinthewrongexasperatedherwithhim。\"Oh,Idaresayyouwerecurious。Don’tyousupposeIhavenoticedthatmenarepuzzledatme?WhatdidyoumeanbysayingthatyouthoughtIwouldbeequaltoanything?\"
\"Imeant——Ithoughtyouwouldliketobetreatedfrankly。\"
\"Andyouwouldn’ttreateverybodyso?\"
\"Iwouldn’ttreatMrs。Maynardso。\"
\"Oh!\"shesaid。\"Youtreatmeuponatheory。\"
\"Don’tyoulikethat?Wetreateverybodyuponatheory\"——
\"Yes,Iknow\"
\"AndIshouldtellyoutheworstofanythingatonce,becauseIthinkyouareoneofthekindthatdon’tliketohavetheirconclusionsmadeforthem。\"
\"Andyouwouldreallyletwomenmaketheirownconclusions,\"shesaid。
\"Youareverypeculiar!\"Shewaitedawhile,andthensheasked,\"Andwhatisyourtheoryofme?\"
\"Thatyouareverypeculiar。\"
\"How?\"
\"Youareproud。\"
\"Andispridesoverypeculiar?\"
\"Yes;inwomen。\"
\"Indeed!Yousetupforaconnoisseuroffemalecharacter。That’sverycommon,nowadays。Whydon’tyoutellmesomethingmoreaboutYourself?
We’realwaystalkingaboutme。\"
Hemightwellhavebeendoubtfulofherhumor。Heseemedtodecidethatshewasjesting,forheansweredlightly,\"Why,youbeganit。\"
\"IknowIdid,thistime。ButnowIwishtostopit,too。\"
Helookeddownatthetillerinhishands。\"Well,\"hesaid,\"Ishouldliketotellyouaboutmyself。IshouldliketoknowwhatyouthinkofthekindofmanIam。WillyoubehonestifIwill?\"
\"That’saverystrangecondition,\"sheanswered,meetingandthenavoidingthegazeheliftedtoherface。
\"What?Beinghonest?\"
\"Well,no——Or,yes!\"
\"Itisn’tforyou。\"
\"Thankyou。ButI’mnotunderdiscussionnow。\"
\"Well,inthefirstplace,\"hebegan,\"Iwasafraidofyouwhenwemet。\"
\"Afraidofme?\"
\"Thatisn’ttheword,perhaps。We’llsayashamedofmyself。Mrs。
Maynardtoldmeaboutyou,andIthoughtyouwoulddespisemefornotdoingorbeinganythinginparticular。Ithoughtyoumust。\"
\"Indeed!\"
Hehesitated,asifstilluncertainofhermoodfromthisintonation,andthenhewenton:\"ButIhadsomelittlehopeyouwouldtolerateme,afterall。YoulookedlikeafriendIusedtohave。——Doyoumindmytellingyou?\"
\"Oh,no。ThoughIcan’tsaythatit’seververycomfortabletobetoldthatyoulooklikesomeoneelse。\"
\"Idon’tsupposeanyoneelsewouldhavebeenstruckbytheresemblance,\"
saidLibby,withalaughofreminiscence。\"Hewashuge。Buthehadeyeslikeagirl,——Ibegyourpardon,——likeyours。\"
\"YoumeanthatIhaveeyeslikeaman。\"
Helaughed,andsaid,\"No,\"andthenturnedgrave。\"Aslongashelived\"——
\"Oh,ishedead?\"sheaskedmoregentlythanshehadyetspoken。
\"Yes,hediedjustbeforeIwentabroad。Iwentoutonbusinessformyfather,——he’sanimporterandjobber,——andboughtgoodsforhim。Doyoudespisebusiness?\"
\"Idon’tknowanythingaboutit。\"
\"Ididittopleasemyfather,andhesaidIwasaverygoodbuyer。Hethinksthere’snothinglikebuying——exceptselling。Heusedtosellthingshimself,overthecounter,andnotsolongago,either。
IfancieditmadeadifferenceformewhenIwasincollege,andthattheyardstickcamebetweenmeandsociety。Iwasanassforthinkinganythingaboutit。ThoughIdidn’treallycare,much。Ineverlikedsociety,andIdidlikeboatsandhorses。Ithoughtofaprofession,once。Butitwouldn’twork。I’vebeenroundtheworldtwice,andI’vedonenothingbutenjoymyselfsinceIleftcollege,——ortryto。WhenI
firstsawyouIwashesitatingaboutlettingmyfathermakemeofuse。
Hewantsmetobecomeoneofthemostrespectablemembersofsociety,hewantsmetobeacotton-spinner。Youknowthere’snothingsoirreproachableascotton,forabusiness?\"
\"No。Idon’tknowaboutthosethings。\"
\"Well,thereisn’t。WhenIwasabroad,buyingandselling,Imadealittlediscovery:IfoundthatthereweregoodswecouldmakeandsellintheEuropeanmarketcheaperthantheEnglish,andthatgavemyfatherthenotionofbuyingamilltomakethem。I’mboringyou!\"
\"No。\"
\"Well,heboughtit;andhewantsmetotakechargeofit。\"
\"Andshallyou?\"
\"DoyouthinkI’mfitforit?\"
\"I?HowshouldIknow?\"
\"Youdon’tknowcotton;butyouknowmealittle。DoIstrikeyouasfitforanything?\"Shemadenoreplytothis,andhelaughed。\"IassureyouIfeltsmallenoughwhenIheardwhatyouhaddone,andthought——whatI
haddone。Itgavemeastart;andIwrotemyfatherthatnightthatI
wouldgoinforit。\"
\"Ioncethoughtofgoingtoafactorytown,\"sheanswered,withoutwilfulevasion,\"tobeginmypracticethereamongtheoperatives’children。I
shouldhavedoneitifithadnotbeenforcomingherewithMrs。Maynard。
Itwouldhavebeenbetter。\"
\"Cometomyfactorytown,MissBreen!Thereoughttobefeversthereintheautumn,withallthelowlandsthatI’mallowedtofloodMrs。Maynardtoldmeaboutyourplan。\"
\"Pray,whatelsedidMrs。Maynardtellyouaboutme?\"
\"Aboutyourtakingupaprofession,inthewayyoudid,whenyouneedn’t,andwhenyoudidn’tparticularlylikeit。\"
\"Oh!\"shesaid。Thensheadded,\"AndbecauseIwasn’tobligedtoit,anddidn’tlikeit,youtoleratedme?\"
\"Tolerated?\"heechoed。
Thisvexedher。\"Yes,tolerate!Everybody,interestedornot,hastomakeuphismindwhethertotoleratemeassoonashehearswhatIam。
Whatexcusedidyoumakeforme?\"
\"Ididn’tmakeany,\"saidLibby。
\"Butyouhadyourmisgiving,yoursurprise。\"
\"Ithoughtifyoucouldstandit,otherpeoplemight。Ithoughtitwasyouraffair。\"
\"JustasifIhadbeenayoungman?\"
\"No!Thatwasn’tpossible。\"
Shewassilent。Then,\"Theconversationhas-gotbackintotheoldquarter,\"shesaid。\"Youaretalkingaboutmeagain。Haveyouheardfromyourfriendssincetheywentaway?\"
\"Whatfriends?\"
\"Thoseyouwerecampingwith。\"
\"No。\"
\"WhatdidtheysaywhentheyheardthatyouhadfoundayoungdoctressatJocelyn’s?Howdidyoubreakthefacttothem?Whatjokesdidtheymake?Youneedn’tbeafraidtotellme!\"shecried。\"GivemeMr。
Johnson’scomments。\"
Helookedatherinsurprisethatincensedherstillmore,andrenderedherincapableofregardingthepainwithwhichheansweredher。\"I’mafraid,\"hesaid,\"thatIhavedonesomethingtooffendyou。\"
\"Ohno!Whatcouldyouhavedone?\"
\"ThenyoureallymeantoaskmewhetherIwouldletanyonemakeajokeofyouinmypresence?\"
\"Yes;whynot?\"
\"Becauseitwasimpossible,\"heanswered。
\"Whywasitimpossible?\"shepursued。
\"Because——Iloveyou。\"
Shehadbeenlookinghimdefiantlyintheeyes,andshecouldnotwithdrawhergaze。Fortheendlessmomentthatensued,herbreathwastakenaway。Thensheaskedinalow,steadyvoice,\"Didyoumeantosaythat?\"
\"No。\"
\"Ibelieveyou,andIforgiveyou。No,no!\"shecried,atademonstrationofprotestfromhim,\"don’tspeakagain!\"
Heobeyed,instantly,implicitly。Withthetillerinhishandhelookedpastherandguidedtheboat’scourse。Itbecameintolerable。
\"HaveIeverdoneanythingthatgaveyoutherightto——to——saythat?\"sheasked,withouttheself-commandwhichshemighthavewishedtoshow。
\"No,\"hesaid,\"youwereonlythemostbeautiful\"——
\"Iamnotbeautiful!AndifIwere\"——
\"Itwasn’ttobehelped!Isawfromthefirsthowgoodandnobleyouwere,and\"——
\"Thisisabsurd!\"sheexclaimed。\"Iamneithergoodnornoble;andifI
were\"——
\"Itwouldn’tmakeanydifference。Whateveryouare,youaretheonewomanintheworldtome;andyoualwayswillbe。\"
\"Mr。Libby!\"
\"Oh,Imustspeaknow!Youwerealwaysthinking,becauseyouhadstudiedaman’sprofession,thatnoonewouldthinkofyouasawoman,asifthatcouldmakeanydifferencetoamanthathadthesoulofamaninhim!\"
\"No,no!\"sheprotested。\"Ididn’tthinkthat。Ialwaysexpectedtobeconsideredasawoman。\"
\"Butnotasawomantofallinlovewith。Iunderstood。Andthatsomehowmadeyouallthedearertome。Ifyouhadbeenagirllikeothergirls,Ishouldn’thavecaredforyou。\"
\"Oh!\"
\"Ididn’tmeantospeaktoyouto-day。ButsometimeIdidmeantospeak;because,whateverIwas,Ilovedyou;andIthoughtyoudidn’tdislikeme。\"
\"Ididlikeyou,\"shemurmured,\"verymuch。AndIrespectedyou。Butyoucan’tsaythatIevergaveyouanyhopeinthis——this——way。\"Shealmostaskedhimifshehad。
\"No,——notpurposely。Andifyoudid,it’sovernow。Youhaverejectedme。Iunderstandthat。There’snoreasonwhyyoushouldn’t。AndIcanholdmytongue。\"Hedidnotturn,butlookedsteadilypastherattheboat’shead。
Anemotionstirredinherbreastwhichtooktheformofareproach。
\"Wasitfair,then,tosaythiswhenneitherofuscouldescapeafterwards?\"
\"Ididn’tmeantospeak,\"hesaid,withoutlookingup,\"andInevermeanttoplaceyouwhereyoucouldn’tescape。\"
Itwastruethatshehadproposedtogowithhimintheboat,andthatshehadchosentocomebackwithhim,whenhehadofferedtohaveherdrivenhomefromLeyden。\"No,youarenottoblame,\"shesaid,atlast。
\"Iaskedtosomewithyou。ShallItellyouwhy?\"Hervoicebegantobreak。Inherpityforhimandhershameforherselfthetearsstartedtohereyes。Shedidnotpressherquestion,but,\"ThankyouforremindingmethatIinvitedmyselftogowithyou,\"shesaid,withfeeblebitterness。
Helookedupatherinsilentwonder,andshebrokeintoasob。Hesaidgently,\"Idon’tsupposeyouexpectmetodenythat。Youdon’tthinkmesuchapoordogasthat。\"
\"Why,ofcoursenot,\"sheanswered,withquiveringlips,whileshepressedherhandkerchieftohereyes。
\"Iwasonlytoogladtohaveyoucome。Ialwaysmeanttotellyou——whatIhavetold;butnotwhenIshouldseemtotrapyouintolistening。\"
\"No,\"shemurmured,\"Icanbelievethatofyou。Idobelieveit。ItakebackwhatIsaid。Don’tletusspeakofitanymorenow,\"shecontinued,strugglingforherlostcomposure,withwhatsuccessappearedinthefreshoutburstwithwhichsherecognizedhisforbearancetohintatanypainfulnesstohimselfinthesituation。
\"Idon’tminditsomuchonmyaccount,butoh!howcouldyouforyourownsake?Doletusgethomeasfast-aswecan!\"
\"IamdoingeverythingIcantoreleaseyou,\"hesaid。\"Ifyouwillsithere,\"headded,indicatingtheplacebesidehiminthestern,\"youwon’thavetochangesomuchwhenIwanttotack。\"
Shetooktheotherseat,andforthefirsttimeshenoticedthatthewindhadgrownverylight。Shewatchedhimwithapiteousimpatiencewhileheshiftedthesailfromsidetoside,keepingthesheetinhishandforconvenienceinthefrequentchanges。Hescannedthesky,andturnedeverycurrentoftheebbingtidetoaccount。Itwasuseless;theboatcrept,andpresentlyitscarcelymoved。
\"Thewindisdown,\"hesaid,makingthesheetfast,andrelaxinghisholdonthetillerAnd——Andthetideisgoingout!\"sheexclaimed。
\"Thetideisgoingout,\"headmitted。
\"Ifweshouldgetcaughtontheseflats,\"shebegan,withrisingindignation。
\"Weshouldhavetostaytillthetideturned。\"
Shelookedwildlyaboutforaid。Iftherewerearow-boatanywherewithinhail,shecouldbetakentoJocelyn’sinthat。Buttheywerequitealoneonthoselifelesswaters。
Libbygotoutapairofheavyoarsfromthebottomoftheboat,and,settingtherowlocksoneitherside,tuggedsilentlyatthem。
Thefutileeffortsuggestedanideatoherwhichdoubtlessshewouldnothaveexpressedifshehadnotbeenlacking,assheoncesaid,inasenseofhumor。
\"Whydon’tyouwhistleforawind?\"
Hestaredatherinsadastonishmenttomakesurethatshewasinearnest,andthen,\"Whistle!\"heechoedforlornly,andbrokeintoajoylesslaugh。
\"YouknewthechancesofdelaythatItookinaskingtocomewithyou,\"
shecried,\"andyoushouldhavewarnedme。Itwasungenerous——itwasungentlemanly!\"
\"Itwaswhateveryoulike。Imustbetoblame。IsupposeIwastoogladtohaveyoucome。IfIthoughtanything,IthoughtyoumusthavesomeparticularerrandatLeyden。Youseemedanxioustogo,evenifitstormed。\"
\"Ifithadstormed,\"sheretorted,\"Ishouldnothavecared!Ihopeditwouldstorm。ThenatleastIshouldhaverunthesamedanger,——Ihopeditwouldbedangerous。\"
\"Idon’tunderstandwhatyoumean,\"hesaid。
\"Iforcedthatwretchedcreaturetogowithyouthatdaywhenyousaiditwasgoingtoberough;andIshallhaveherblooduponmyhandsifshedies\"
\"Isitpossible,\"criedLibby,pullinginhisuselessoars,andleaningforwarduponthem,\"thatshehasgoneonlettingyouthinkIbelievedtherewasgoingtobeastorm?SheknewperfectlywellthatIdidn’tmindwhatAdamssaid;hewasalwayscroaking。\"Shesatlookingathiminadaze,butshecouldnotspeak,andhecontinued。\"Isee:ithappenedbyonechanceinamilliontoturnoutashesaid;andshehasbeenmakingyoupayforit。Why,Isuppose,\"headded,withamelancholysmileofintelligence,\"she’shadsomuchsatisfactioninholdingyouresponsibleforwhat’shappened,thatshe’salmostgladofit!\"
\"Shehastorturedme!\"criedthegirl。\"Butyou——you,whenyousawthatIdidn’tbelievetherewasgoingtobeanystorm,whydidyou——whydidn’t——you\"——
Ididn’tbelieveiteither!ItwasMrs。Maynardthatproposedthesail,butwhenIsawthatyoudidn’tlikeitIwasgladofanyexcuseforputtingitoff。Icouldn’thelpwantingtopleaseyou,andI
couldn’tseewhyyouurgedusafterwards;butIsupposedyouhadsomereason。\"
Shepassedherhandoverherforehead,asiftoclearawaytheconfusioninwhichallthisinvolvedher。\"Butwhy——whydidyouletmegoonthinkingmyselftoblame\"——
\"HowcouldIknowwhatyouwerethinking?HeavenknowsIdidn’tdreamofsuchathing!ThoughIremember,now,yoursaying\"——
\"Oh,Isee!\"shecried。\"Youareaman!ButIcan’tforgiveit,——no,I
can’tforgiveit!Youwishedtodeceiveherifyoudidn’twishtodeceiveme。Howcanyouexcuseyourselfforrepeatingwhatyoudidn’tbelieve?\"
\"IwaswillingsheshouldthinkAdamswasright。\"
\"Andthatwasdeceit。Whatcanyousaytoit?\"
\"ThereisonlyonethingIcouldsay,\"hemurmured,lookinghopelesslyintohereyes,\"andthat’sofnouse。\"
Sheturnedherheadaway。Hertragedyhadfallentonothing;orratherithadneverbeen。Allherremorse,allhersuffering,wasmerefarcenow;buthisguiltinthematterwasthegreater。Afierceresentmentburnedinherheart;shelongedtomakehimfeelsomethingoftheanguishshehadneedlesslyundergone。
Hesatwatchingheravertedface。\"MissBreen,\"hesaidhuskily,\"willyouletmespeaktoyou?\"
\"Oh,youhavemeinyourpower,\"sheansweredcruelly。\"Saywhatyoulike。\"
Hedidnotspeak,normakeanymotiontodoso。
Afoolish,idlecuriositytoknowwhat,afterallthathadhappened,hecouldpossiblyhavetosay,stirredwithinher,butshedisdainfullystifledit。Theywerebothsostillthatacompanyofsealsfounditsafetoputtheirheadsabovewater,andapproachnearenoughtoexamineherwiththeirroundsofteyes。Sheturnedfromthesillythingsincontemptthattheyshouldevenhaveinterestedher。Shefeltthatfromtimetotimehercompanionliftedananxiousglancetothedullheavens。
Atlastthelimpsailfaintlystirred;itflapped;itfilledshallowly;
theboatmoved。Thesailseemedtohavehadaprescienceofthewindbeforeitpassedoverthesmoothwaterlikeashadow。
Whenawomansayssheneverwillforgiveaman,shealwayshasaconditionofforgivenessinherheart。Nowthatthewindhadrisenagain,\"Ihavenorighttoforbidyoutospeak,\"shesaid,asifnosilencehadelapsed,andsheturnedroundandquietlyconfrontedhim;shenolongerfeltsoimpatienttoescape。
Hedidnotmeethereyeatonce,andheseemedinnohastetoavailhimselfoftheleavegrantedhim。Aheavysadnessblottedthegayetyofafacewhosesunnysympathyhadbeenheronlycheerformanydays。Shefanciedabewildermentinitshopelessnesswhichsmoteherwithstillsharperpathos。\"Ofcourse,\"shesaid,\"IappreciateyourwishtodowhatIwanted,aboutMrs。Maynard。Iremembermytellingyouthatsheoughtn’ttogoout,thatday。Butthatwasnotthewaytodoit\"——
\"Therewasnoother,\"hesaid。
\"No,\"sheassented,uponreflection。\"Thenitoughtn’ttohavebeendone。\"
Heshowednosignofintendingtocontinue,andafteramomentofrestlessness,shebeganagain。
\"IfIhavebeenrudeorhastyinrefusingtohearyou,Mr。Libby,Iamverywrong。Imusthearanythingyouhavetosay。\"
\"Oh,notunlessyouwish。\"
\"Iwishwhateveryouwish。\"
\"I’mnotsurethatIwishthatnow。Ihavethoughtitover;Ishouldonlydistressyoufornothing。Youarelettingmesaywhysentenceshouldn’tbepasseduponme。Sentenceisgoingtobepassedanyway。
IshouldonlyrepeatwhatIhavesaid。Youwouldpityme,butyoucouldn’thelpme。Andthatwouldgiveyoupainfornothing。No,itwouldbeuseless。\"
\"Itwouldbeuselesstotalktomeabout——loving。\"Shetookthewordonherlipswithacertaineffectofadoptingitforconvenience’sakeinhervocabulary。\"Allthatwasendedformelongago,——tenyearsago。
Andmywholelifesincethenhasbeenshapedtodowithoutit。Iwilltellyoumystoryifyoulike。Perhapsit’syourdue。Iwishtobejust。Youmayhavearighttoknow。\"
\"No,Ihaven’t。But。——perhapsIoughttosaythatMrs。Maynardtoldmesomething。\"
\"Well,Iamgladofthat,thoughshehadnorighttodoit。Thenyoucanunderstand。\"
\"Oh,yes,Icanunderstand。Idon’tpretendthatIhadanyreasoninit。\"
Heforboreagaintourgeanypleaforhimself,andoncemoreshewasobligedtointerfereinhisbehalf。\"Mr。Libby,IhaveneverconfessedthatIoncewrongedyouinawaythatI’mverysorryfor。\"
\"AboutMrs。Maynard?Yes,Iknow。Iwon’ttrytowhitewashmyself;butitdidn’toccurtomehowitwouldlook。Iwantedtotalkwithheraboutyou。\"
\"Yououghttohaveconsideredher,though,\"shesaidgently。
\"Sheoughttohaveconsideredherself,\"heretorted,withhisunfailingbitternessforMrs。Maynard。\"Butitdoesn’tmatterwhosefaultitwas。
I’msufficientlypunished;forIknowthatitinjuredmewithyou。\"
\"Itdidatfirst。ButnowIcanseethatIwaswrong。Iwishedtotellyouthat。Itisn’tcreditabletomethatIthoughtyouintendedtoflirtwithher。IfIhadbeenbettermyself\"——
\"You!\"Hecouldnotsaymore。
Thatutterfaithinherwasverycharming。Itsoftenedhermoreandmore;itmadeherwishtoreasonwithhim,andtrygentlytoshowhimhowimpossiblehishopewas。\"Andyouknow,\"shesaid,recurringtosomethingthathadgonebefore,\"thatevenifIhadcaredforyouinthewayyouwish,itcouldn’tbe。Youwouldn’twanttohavepeoplelaughingandsayingIhadbeenadoctress。\"
\"Ishouldn’thaveminded。Iknowhowmuchpeople’stalkisworth。\"
\"Yes,\"shesaid,\"Iknowyouwouldbegenerousandbraveaboutthat——
aboutanything。Butwhat——what,ifIcouldn’tgiveupmycareer——myhopesofbeingusefulinthewayIhaveplanned?Youwouldn’thavelikedmetogoonpractisingmedicine?\"
\"Ithoughtofthat,\"heansweredsimply。\"Ididn’tseehowitcouldbedone。Butifyousawanyway,Iwaswilling——No,thatwasmygreattrouble!Iknewthatitwasselfishinme,andveryconceited,tosupposeyouwouldgiveupyourwholelifeforme;andwheneverIthoughtofthat,Ideterminednottoaskyou。ButItriednottothinkofthat。\"
\"Well,don’tyousee?ButifIcouldhaveansweredyouasyouwish,itwouldn’thavebeenanythingtogiveupeverythingforyou。Awomanisn’tsomethingelsefirst,andawomanafterwards。Iunderstandhowunselfishlyyoumeant,andindeed,indeed,Ithankyou。Butdon’tlet’stalkofitanymore。Itcouldn’thavebeen,andthereisnothingbutmiseryinthinkingofit。\"Come,\"shesaid,withastruggleforcheerfulness,\"letusforgetit。Letitbejustasifyouhadn’tspokentome;Iknowyoudidn’tintendtodoit;andletusgoonasifnothinghadhappened。\"
\"Oh,wecan’tgoon,\"heanswered。\"Ishallgetaway,assoonasMaynardcomes,andridyouofthesightofme。\"
\"Areyougoingaway?\"shesoftlyasked。\"Whyneedyou?Iknowthatpeoplealwaysseemtothinktheycan’tbefriendsafter——suchathingasthis。Butwhyshouldn’twe?Irespectyou,andIlikeyouverymuch。
Youhaveshownmemoreregardandmorekindnessthananyotherfriend\"——
\"ButIwasn’tyourfriend,\"heinterrupted。\"Ilovedyou。\"
\"Well,\"shesighed,ingentleperplexity,\"thenyoucan’tbemyfriend?\"
Never。ButIshallalwaysloveyou。Ifitwoulddoanygood,Iwouldstay,asyouaskit。Ishouldn’tmindmyself。ButIshouldbeanuisancetoyou。\"
\"No,no!\"sheexclaimed。\"Iwilltaketheriskofthat。Ineedyouradvice,your——sympathy,your——Youwon’ttroubleme,indeedyouwon’t。
Perhapsyouhavemistakenyour——feelingaboutme。It’ssuchaverylittletimesincewemet,\"shepleaded。
\"Thatmakesnodifference,——thetime。AndI’mnotmistaken。\"
\"Well,stayatleasttillMrs。Maynardiswell,andwecanallgoawaytogether。Promisemethat!\"Sheinstinctivelyputoutherhandtowardhiminentreaty。Hetookit,andpressingittohislipscovereditwithkisses。
\"Oh!\"shegrievedinreproachfulsurprise。
\"There!\"hecried。\"YouseethatImustgo!\"
\"Yes,\"shesighedinassent,\"youmustgo。\"
Theydidnotlookateachotheragain,butremainedinalamentablesilencewhiletheboatpushedswiftlybeforethefresheningbreeze;andwhentheyreachedtheplacewherethedorylay,hedroppedthesailandthrewouttheanchorwithoutaword。
Hewashaggardtotheglanceshestoleathim,whentheyhadtakentheirplacesinthedory,andheconfrontedher,pullinghardattheoars。Hedidnotlifthiseyestohers,butfromtimetotimehelookedoverhisshoulderattheboat’sprow,andherowedfromonepointtoanotherforagoodlanding。Adreamypityforhimfilledher;throughthememoriesofherownsuffering,shedivinedthesorenessofhisheart。
Shestartedfromherreverieasthebottomofthedorystruckthesand。
Theshoalwaterstretchedtwentyfeetbeyond。Hepulledintheoarsandrosedesperately。\"It’sofnouse:Ishallhavetocarryyouashore。\"
Shesatstaringupintohisface,andlongingtoaskhimsomething,toaccusehimofhavingdonethispurposely。Butshehaderredinsomanydoubts,hersuspicionsofhimhadallrecoiledsopitilesslyuponher,thatshehadnolongerthecouragetoquestionorreproachhim。\"Oh,no,thankyou,\"shesaidweakly。\"Iwon’ttroubleyou。I——Iwillwaittillthetideisout。\"
\"Thetide’soutnow,\"heansweredwithcoldness,\"andyoucan’twade。\"
Sherosedesperately。\"Why,ofcourse!\"shecriedinself-contempt,glancingatthewater,intowhichhepromptlysteppedtohisboot-tops。
\"Awomanmustn’tgetherfeetwet。\"
VIII。
Gracewenttoherownroomtolayasidehershawlandhat,beforegoingtoMrs。Maynard,andfoundhermothersewingthere。
\"Why,whoiswithMrs。Maynard?\"sheasked。
\"MissGleasonisreadingtoher,\"saidMrs。Breen。\"Ifshehadanysortofactivetreatment,shecouldgetwellatonce。Icouldn’ttaketheresponsibilityofdoinganythingforher,anditwassuchaworrytostayandseeeverythinggoingwrong,thatwhenMissGleasoncameinIwasgladtogetaway。MissGleasonseemstobelieveinyourDr。Mulbridge。\"
\"MyDr。Mulbridge!\"echoedGrace。
\"Shetalkedofhimasifhewereyours。Idon’tknowwhatyou’vebeensayingtoherabouthim;butyouhadbetterbecareful。Thewomanisafool。\"Shenowlookedupatherdaughterforthefirsttime。\"Why,whatisthematterwithyouwhatkeptyousolong?Youlookperfectlywild。\"
\"Ifeelwild,\"saidGracecalmly。\"Thewindwentdown。\"
\"Wasthatall?Idon’tseewhythatshouldmakeyoufeelwild,\"saidhermother,droppingherspectaclestohersewingagain。
\"Itwasn’tall,\"answeredthegirl,sinkingprovisionallyuponthesideofachair,withhershawlstillonherarm,andherhatinherhand。
\"Mother,haveyounoticedanythingpeculiaraboutMr。Libby?\"
\"He’stheonlypersonwhoseemstobeoftheslightestuseabouthere;
I’venoticedthat,\"saidMrs。Breen。\"He’salwaysgoingandcomingforyouandMrs。Maynard。Whereisthatworthlesshusbandofhers?Hasn’thehadtimetocomefromCheyenneyet?\"
\"He’sontheway。HewasoutathisranchwhenMr。Libbytelegraphedfirst,andhadtobesentfor。WefoundadespatchfromhimatLeyden,sayinghehadstarted,\"Graceexplained。
\"Whatbusinesshadhetobesofarawayatall?\"demandedhermother。
ItwasplainthatMrs。Breenwasinhermostcensorioustemper,whichhadprobablyacquiredasharperedgetowardsMaynardfromherreconciliationwithhiswife。
Graceseizedherchancetomeettheworst。\"DoyouthinkthatIhavedoneanythingtoencourageMr。Libby?\"sheasked,lookingbravelyathermother。
\"Encouragehimtodowhat?\"askedMrs。Breen,withoutliftinghereyesfromherwork。
\"Encouragedhimto——thinkIcaredforhim;to——tobeinlovewithme。\"
Mrs。Breenliftedherheadnow,andpushedherspectaclesuponherforehead,whilesheregardedherdaughterinsilence。\"Hashebeenmakinglovetoyou?\"
\"Yes。\"
Hermotherpushedherspectaclesdownagain;and,turningtheseamwhichshehadbeensewing,flatteneditwithherthumb-nail。Shemadethisactionexpressiveofhavingforeseensucharesult,andofhavingstruggledagainstit,neglectedandalone。\"Verywell,then。Ihopeyouacceptedhim?\"sheaskedquietly。
\"Mother!\"
\"Whynot?Youmustlikehim,\"shecontinuedinthesametone。\"Youhavebeenwithhimeverymomentthelastweekthatyouhaven’tbeenwithMrs。
Maynard。AtleastI’veseennothingofyou,exceptwhenyoucametotellmeyouweregoingtowalkortodrivewithhim。Youseemtohaveaskedhimtotakeyoumostofthetime。\"
\"Howcanyousaysuchathing,mother?\"criedthegirl。
\"Didn’tyouaskhimtoletyougowithhimthisafternoon?Youtoldmeyoudid。\"
\"Yes,Idid。Ididitforapurpose。\"
\"Ah!forapurpose,\"saidMrs。Breen,takingasurveyofthenewseam,whichshepulledfromherknee,whereoneendofitwaspinned,towardsherchin。Sheleftthewordtoherdaughter,whowasobligedtotakeit。
\"IaskedhimtoletmegowithhimbecauseLouisehadtorturedmeaboutmakinghergooutinhisboat,tillIcouldn’tbearitanylonger。ItseemedtomethatifItookthesameriskmyself,itwouldbesomething;
andIhopedtherewouldbeastorm。\"
\"Ishouldthinkyouhadtakenleaveofyoursenses,\"Mrs。Breenobserved,withherspectaclesintentuponherseam。\"Didyouthinkitwouldbeanyconsolationtohimifyouweredrowned,ortoher?Andif,\"sheadded,herconsciencerisingequaltothevicariousdemanduponit,\"youhopedtherewouldbedanger,hadyouanyrighttoexposehimtoit?Evenifyouchosetoriskyourownlife,youhadnorighttoriskhis。\"Sheliftedherspectaclesagain,andturnedtheiraustereglitteruponherdaughter。
\"Yes,itallseemsverysillynow,\"saidthegirl,withahopelesssigh。
\"Silly!\"criedhermother。\"I’mgladyoucancallitsilly。\"
\"Anditseemedworsestillwhenhetoldmethathehadneverbelieveditwasgoingtostormthatday,whenhetookLouiseout。Hismansaiditwas,andherepeateditbecausehesawIdidn’twanthertogo。\"
\"Perhaps,\"suggestedMrs。Breen,\"ifhewaswillingtodeceiveherthen,heiswillingtodeceiveyounow。\"
\"Hedidn’tdeceiveher。Hesaidwhathehadheard。Andhesaiditbecausehe——Iwishedit。\"
\"Icallitdeceiving。Truthistruth。ThatiswhatIwastaught;andthat’swhatIsupposedIhadtaughtyou。\"
\"IwouldtrustMr。Libbyinanything,\"returnedthedaughter。\"Heisperfectlyfrankabouthimself。Heconfessedthathehaddoneittopleaseme。Hesaidthatnothingelsecouldexcuseit。\"
\"Oh,thenyouhaveacceptedhim!\"
\"No,mother,Ihaven’t。Ihaverefusedhim,andheisgoingawayassoonasMr。Maynardcomes。\"Shesatlookingatthewindow,andthetearsstoleintohereyes,andblurredtheseaandskytogetherwhereshesawtheirmeetingatthehorizonline。
\"Well,\"saidhermother,\"theirthatistheendofit,Ipresume。\"
\"Yes,that’stheend,\"saidGrace。\"But——Ifeltsorryforhim,mother。
Once,\"shewenton,\"IthoughtIhadeverythingclearbeforeme;butnowIseemonlytohavemadeconfusionofmylife。Yes,\"sheaddeddrearily,\"itwasfoolishandwicked,anditwasperfectlyuseless,too。Ican’tescapefromtheconsequencesofwhatIdid。Itmakesnodifferencewhathebelievedoranyonebelieved。IdrovethemontorisktheirlivesbecauseIthoughtmyselfsomuchbetterthanthey;becauseIwasself-
righteousandsuspiciousandstubborn。Well,Imustbearthepenalty:
andoh,ifIcouldonlybearitalone!\"Withalongsighshetookbacktheburdenwhichshehadbeenstrugglingtocastoff,andfromwhichforatimeshehadactuallyseemedtoescape。Sheputawayherhatandshawl,andstoodbeforetheglass,smoothingherhair。\"Whenwilliteverend?\"shemoanedtothereflectionthere,ratherthantohermother,whodidnotinterruptthisspiritualordeal。Inanotherage,suchaNewEnglandgirlwouldhavetorturedherselfwithinquisitionastosomeneglecteddutytoGod;——inours,whenreligionissolargelyhumanified,thisPuritansoulcouldonlywreakitselfinasenseofirreparablewrongtoherfellow-creature。
WhenshewentoutshemetMissGleasonhalf-waydownthecorridortoMrs。
Maynard’sdoor。Thelatterhadabookinherhand,andcameforwardwhispering。\"She’sasleep,\"shesaidverysibilantly。\"Ihavereadhertosleep,andshe’ssleepingbeautifully。Haveyoueverreadit?\"sheasked,withhoarsebreaksfromherundertone,asshehelduponeofthosecheaplibrary-editionsofanoveltowardGrace。
\"JaneEyre?Why,ofcourse。Longago。\"
\"SohaveI,\"saidMissGleason。\"ButIsentandgotitagain,torefreshmyimpressionsofRochester。WeallthinkDr。Mulbridgeisjustlikehim。Rochesterismyidealcharacter,——aperfectconceptionofaman:soabrupt,sorough,sosavage。Oh,Ilikethosemen!Don’tyou?\"shefluted。\"Mrs。Maynardseestheresemblance,aswellastherestofus。
ButIknow!Youdon’tapproveofthem。Isupposetheycan’tbedefendedonsomegrounds;butIcanseehow,eveninsuchacaseasthis,theperfectmasteryoftheman-physicianconstitutesthehighestusefulnessofthewoman-physician。Theadvancementofwomenmustbeaswomen。
’Maleandfemalecreatedhethem,’anditisonlyinrememberingthisthatwearehelpingGawd,whetherasananthropomorphicconceptionorauniversallypervadinginstinctoflove,don’tyouthink?\"
Withhernovelclappedagainstherbreast,sheleanedwinninglyovertowardGrace,andfixedherwithherwideeyes,whichhadringsofwhiteroundthepupils。
\"Dotellme!\"sheranonwithoutwaitingananswer。\"Didn’tyougowithMr。Libbybecauseyouhopeditmightstorm,andwishedtotakethesameriskasMrs。Maynard?ItoldMrs。Algeryoudid!\"
Graceflushedguiltily,andMissGleasoncoweredalittle,perhapsinterpretingthecolorasresentment。\"Ishouldconsiderthataverysillymotive,\"shesaid,helplesslyashamedthatshewasleavingtheweightoftheblowuponMissGleason’sshouldersinsteadofherown。
\"Ofcourse,\"saidMissGleasonenthusiastically,\"youcan’tconfessit。
ButIknowyouarecapableofsuchathing——ofanythingheroic!
Doforgiveme,\"shesaid,seizingGrace’shand。Shehelditamoment,gazingwithadevouringfondnessintoherface,whichshestoopedalittlesidewisetopeerupinto。Thenshequicklydroppedherhand,and,whirlingaway,glidedslimlyoutofthecorridor。
GracesoftlyopenedMrs。Maynard’sdoor,andthesickwomanopenedhereyes。\"Iwasn’tasleep,\"shesaidhoarsely,\"butIhadtopretendtobe,orthatwomanwouldhavekilledme。\"
Gracewenttoherandfeltherhandsandherflushedforehead。
\"Iamworsethisevening,\"saidMrs。Maynard。
\"Oh,no,\"sighedthegirl,droppingintoachairatthebedside,withhereyesfixedinasortoffascinationontheluridfaceofthesickwoman。
\"Aftergettingmehere,\"continuedMrs。Maynard,inthesamelow,hoarsemurmur,\"youmightatleaststaywithmealittle。Whatkeptyousolong?\"
\"Thewindfell。Wewerebecalmed。\"
\"WewerenotbecalmedthedayIwentoutwithMr。Libby。Butperhapsnobodyforcedyoutogo。
Havinglaunchedthisdart,sheclosedhereyesagainwithsomethingmorelikecontentthanshehadyetshown:ithadanaimofwhichshecouldalwaysbesure。
\"WehaveheardfromMr。Maynard,\"saidGracehumbly。\"TherewasadespatchwaitingforMr。LibbyatLeyden。Heisonhisway。\"
Mrs。Maynardbetrayednoimmediateeffectofthisotherthantosay,\"Hehadbetterhurry,\"anddidnotopenhereyes。
Gracewentabouttheroomwithaleadenweightineveryfibre,puttingtheplaceinorder,andMrs。Maynarddidnotspeakagaintillshehadfinished。Thenshesaid,\"IwantyoutotellmejusthowbadDr。
MulbridgethinksIam。\"
\"Hehasneverexpressedanyanxiety,\"Gracebegan,withherinaptnessatevasion。
\"Ofcoursehehasn’t,\"murmuredthesickwoman。\"Heisn’tafool!
Whatdoeshesay?\"
Thispassedthesufferanceevenofremorse。\"Hesaysyoumustn’ttalk,\"
thegirlflashedout。\"Andifyouinsistupondoingso,Iwillleaveyou,andsendsomeoneelsetotakecareofyou。\"
\"Verywell,then。Iknowwhatthatmeans。Whenadoctortellsyounottotalk,it’sbecauseheknowshecan’tdoyouanygood。AssoonasGeorgeMaynardgetshereIwillhavesomeonethatcancureme,orIwillknowthereasonwhy。\"Theconceptionofherhusbandasachampionseemedtocommendhimtoherinnoveldegree。Sheshedsometears,andafteralittlereflectionsheasked,\"Howsoonwillhebehere?\"
\"Idon’tknow,\"saidGrace。\"Heseemstohavestartedyesterdaymorning。\"
\"Hecanbeherebydayafterto-morrow,\"Mrs。Maynardcomputed。\"TherewillbesomeonetolookafterpoorlittleBellathen,\"sheadded,asif,duringhersickness,Bellamusthavebeenwhollyneglected。\"Don’tletthechildbealldirtwhenherfathercomes。\"
\"MotherwilllookafterBella,\"Gracereplied,toomeekagaintoresenttheimplication。Afterapause,\"Oh,Louise,\"sheaddedbeseechingly,\"I’vesufferedsomuchfrommyownwrong-headednessandobstinacythatI
couldn’tbeartoseeyoutakingthesamerisk,andI’msogladthatyouaregoingtomeetyourhusbandintherightspirit。\"
\"Whatrightspirit?\"croakedMrs。Maynard。
\"Thewishtopleasehim,to\"——
\"Idon’tchoosetohavehimsaythathischilddisgraceshim,\"repliedMrs。Maynard,inthelow,husky,monotonousmurmurinwhichshewasobligedtouttereverything。
\"But,dearLouise!\"criedtheother,\"youchoosesomethingelsetoo,don’tyou?Youwishtomeethimasifnounkindnesshadpartedyou,andasifyouweretobealwaystogetherafterthis?Ihopeyoudo!ThenI
shouldfeelthatallthissufferingand,troublewasamercy。\"
\"Otherpeople’smiseryisalwaysamercytothem,\"hoarselysuggestedMrs。Maynard。
\"Yes,Iknowthat,\"Gracesubmitted,withmeekconviction。\"But,Louise,\"shepleaded,\"youwillmakeupwithyourhusband,won’tyou?
Whateverhehasdone,thatwillsurelybebest。Iknowthatyoulovehim,andthathemustloveyou,yet。It’stheonlyway。Ifyouwerefinallyseparatedfromhim,andyouandhecouldbehappyapart,whatwouldbecomeofthatpoorchild?Whowilltakeafather’splacewithher?That’stheworstaboutit。Oh,Louise,Ifeelsobadlyforyou——
forwhatyouhavelost,andmaylose。Marriagemustchangepeoplesothatunlesstheylivetoeachother,theirliveswillbemaimedanduseless。Itoughttobesomucheasiertoforgiveanywrongyourhusbanddoesyouthantopunishit;forthatperpetuatesthewrong,andforgivenessendsit,andit’stheonlythingthatcanendawrong。Iamsurethatyourhusbandwillbereadytodoorsayanythingyouwish;butifheshouldn’t,Louise,youwillreceivehimforgivingly,andmakethefirstadvance?It’sawoman’srighttomaketheadvancesinforgiving。\"
Mrs。Maynardlaywithherhandsstretchedathersideunderthecovering,andonlyherfacevisibleaboveit。Shenowturnedherheadalittle,soastopiercetheearnestspeakerwithagleamfromherdulleye。\"HaveyouacceptedWalterLibby?\"sheasked。
\"Louise!\"criedGrace,withablushthatburnedlikefire。
\"That’sthewayIusedtotalkwhenIwasfirstengaged。Waittillyou’remarriedawhile。IwantBellatohaveonherpique,andherpinksash,——notthecherryone。Ishouldthinkyouwouldhavestudiedtobeaministerinsteadofadoctor。Butyouneedn’tpreachtome;IshallknowhowtobehavetoGeorgeMaynardwhenhecomes,——ifheeverdoescome。AndnowIshouldthinkyouhadmademetalkenough!\"
\"Yes,Yes,\"saidGrace,recalledtohermoreimmediatedutyinalarm。